Summary of Set Boundaries, Find Peace - Alexander Cooper - E-Book

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Alexander Cooper

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Summary of Set Boundaries, Find Peace

Set Boundaries, Find Peace is an outstanding and the most recent self-help book by Nedra Glover Tawwab; an experienced therapist who has worked in helping many people deal with unhealthy relationships. The book kicks off with the author sharing a preview of her life. She explains how drained she was when going through life saying yes to every request from people. That was until she discovered the benefits that lie in setting boundaries. With this discovery, she moved from someone who always has unfulfilling relationships to someone who finds confidence, and happiness in boundaries setting which in turn brings about healthier relationships.
In the introduction to Set Boundaries, Find Peace, Nedra Glover Tawwab discusses how in her fourteen years of being a therapist, she noticed that most of the problems people sought to solve are problems caused by lack of boundaries. The book gives an in-depth analysis of what boundaries are and all it entails.
Relationships are demanding and if there isn’t a limitation set in place, one can be certain of feeling burnout, overwhelmed and somewhat resentful. These are not only caused by the lack of time for the many ostensible responsibilities in every relationship but by the inability to turn down requests or express a feeling of discomfort. The book explains the different subtle, unhealthy, and unsuccessful ways in which boundaries are created while proffering a lasting, healthy and effective solution to creating boundaries. Not only this, the book prepares you for the different reactions to expect from implementing boundaries as stated in this book. To achieve boundary setting, NedraTawwab gives practical steps to follow regardless of the type of relationship you are setting it for.

Here is a Preview of What You Will Get:

⁃ A Full Book Summary
⁃ An Analysis
⁃ Fun quizzes
⁃ Quiz Answers
⁃ Etc

Get a copy of this summary and learn about the book.

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Alexander Cooper

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Table of contents

SUMMARY of Set Boundaries, Find Peace

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Conclusion

SUMMARY of Set Boundaries, Find Peace

by Nedra Glover Tawwab - A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself - A Comprehensive Summary

SUMMARY of Set Boundaries, Find Peace

Set Boundaries, Find Peace is an outstanding and the most recent self-help book by Nedra Glover Tawwab; an experienced therapist who has worked in helping many people deal with unhealthy relationships. The book kicks off with the author sharing a preview of her life. She explains how drained she was when going through life saying yes to every request from people. That was until she discovered the benefits that lie in setting boundaries. With this discovery, she moved from someone who always has unfulfilling relationships to someone who finds confidence, and happiness in boundaries setting which in turn brings about healthier relationships.

In the introduction to Set Boundaries, Find Peace, Nedra Glover Tawwab discusses how in her fourteen years of being a therapist, she noticed that most of the problems people sought to solve are problems caused by lack of boundaries. The book gives an in-depth analysis of what boundaries are and all it entails.

Relationships are demanding and if there isn’t a limitation set in place, one can be certain of feeling burnout, overwhelmed and somewhat resentful. These are not only caused by the lack of time for the many ostensible responsibilities in every relationship but by the inability to turn down requests or express a feeling of discomfort. The book explains the different subtle, unhealthy, and unsuccessful ways in which boundaries are created while proffering a lasting, healthy and effective solution to creating boundaries. Not only this, the book prepares you for the different reactions to expect from implementing boundaries as stated in this book. To achieve boundary setting, NedraTawwab gives practical steps to follow regardless of the type of relationship you are setting it for.

Here is a Preview of What You Will Get:

⁃ A Full Book Summary

⁃ An Analysis

⁃ Fun quizzes

⁃ Quiz Answers

⁃ Etc

Get a copy of this summary and learn about the book.

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TABLE OF CONTENTS

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Conclusion

Introduction

Set Boundaries, Find Peace is an outstanding and the most recent self-help book by Nedra Glover Tawwab; an experienced therapist who has worked in helping many people deal with unhealthy relationships. The book kicks off with the author sharing a preview of her life. She explains how drained she was when going through life saying yes to every request from people. That was until she discovered the benefits that lie in setting boundaries. With this discovery, she moved from someone who always has unfulfilling relationships to someone who finds confidence, and happiness in boundaries setting which in turn brings about healthier relationships.

In the introduction to Set Boundaries, Find Peace, Nedra Glover Tawwab discusses how in her fourteen years of being a therapist, she noticed that most of the problems people sought to solve are problems caused by lack of boundaries. The book gives an in-depth analysis of what boundaries are and all it entails.

Relationships are demanding and if there isn’t a limitation set in place, one can be certain of feeling burnout, overwhelmed and somewhat resentful. These are not only caused by the lack of time for the many ostensible responsibilities in every relationship but by the inability to turn down requests or express a feeling of discomfort. The book explains the different subtle, unhealthy, and unsuccessful ways in which boundaries are created while proffering a lasting, healthy and effective solution to creating boundaries. Not only this, the book prepares you for the different reactions to expect from implementing boundaries as stated in this book. To achieve boundary setting, NedraTawwab gives practical steps to follow regardless of the type of relationship you are setting it for.

Chapter One

The first section of the book; “Understanding the Importance of Boundaries” is targeted at explaining the what and the why of boundaries. It has nine chapters in which the first chapter is titled What the Heck Are Boundaries? The author defines boundaries as the “expectations and needs that help you feel safe and comfortable in your relationships.” Using Kim – a newly wedded woman that had already been overwhelmed – as a case study. She found herself constantly burnt out by the plans, responsibility, and help she has to offer. Constant exhaustion is the big pointer that you don’t set boundaries. At every turn, you feel the need to always say yes to everyone’s request for help. while in itself, this isn’t bad, this often time leads to you neglecting your self-care.

Contrary to what people think, self-care isn’t a subtle way of saying you are selfish, it simply means you are putting your well-being first before others. if you ever feel overwhelmed by tasks you have to do, resent people when they ask for your help or you avoid people you know might want your help, then you should consider setting boundaries to enhance your self-care. Boundaries are more than just your means of getting self-care. They are also a pointer to people on how they should treat you, they bring clarity to what your role is in any relationship, and in case you are unknowingly stepping out of line, it serves as a precaution.

Boundaries can either be explicit or implicit. Explicit boundaries are the ones you have to communicate to others while implicit boundaries are what your actions communicate. Given these two types of boundaries, you must also be aware of what boundaries others are setting in place for you. When it comes to boundaries, how many people set and interpret them depends on upbringing. Kids that grew up in a family that frequently disregard boundaries would find it hard to create boundaries as they grow up. But in a family that isn’t afraid to communicate the limits they’ve set while respecting others, it would be easy for kids from such a house to assert their limits.

There are three levels of boundaries, namely; the porous, the rigid, and the healthy. Porous boundaries are simply weak boundaries. They are limits set without assertion and often cause anxiety, depression, and uneven dynamics in a relationship. Porous boundaries are common with people that co-depend, overshare, seek approval from people, are too emotionally attached, and accept maltreatment. In simpler terms, these people say yes to anything and everything. The rigid level is more like creating a wall around yourself to keep people out. This is often a form of self-protection which is caused by the fear of being seen as vulnerable.

People at this level never share, are always cold and they have strict unbending rules whilst having high expectations of others. A healthy boundary is the final level. It involves being self-aware of one’s mental, emotional, and physical capacities as well as the ability to communicate this. Healthy boundaries allow you to share suitably, consider other people's opinions without resentment, have clarity of value, and mostly be okay hearing and saying no to people’s requests. With healthy boundaries, you can say no without apologizing and help people without putting yourself at a disadvantage.

Furthermore, there are two parts of setting boundaries; communication and action. Verbally expressing your feelings and need is the first step to creating boundaries. When you explicitly state what you want or feel, you dispel misinterpretation others might have. This must however be done assertively. Action is the final and most important stage of setting boundaries. After stating your limits, you must be ready to enforce them through your actions. If for example, a friend cancels a plan at a moment’s notice, you can gently tell your friend the time that you are most convenient for the meeting instead of just going with their suggestions.

Setting boundaries is a two-way street. They are for you and the other person. When you set limits, it’s expected that people would violate them hence the need for you to always follow through to the end. So, to prepare you for this, here are eight ways people can respond when you share your boundaries with them. People resent changes, especially if it brings limitations which is why pushback is a common response to boundaries. Friends and family will communicate pushback against your boundaries but you must reiterate what your limits are while acknowledging their feelings or concern.