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Is profound reconciliation with one's own parents really possible? With an effective process, it is possible to gradually transform years of conflict into a loving parent-child relationship in order to free everyone involved from old patterns. In the book "Wir haben uns alles gesagt" by Florian Scherbauer, you will learn about the power of your deep feelings to increasingly let go of permanently disturbing emotions such as shame, self-pity, frustration and disappointment in relation to your parents. Embark on the path to pacification and grow into a deeply fulfilling life. This book holds the keys for you with vivid examples and practical applications.
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Seitenzahl: 53
Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2024
Foreword
In 2023, my mother closed the book of her life forever after a long illness. One of the last sentences she spoke to me in consciousness in the clinic was the answer to my question: "Mom, is there anything else you want to tell me?" Her answer was: "We have told each other everything." This sentence came from the bottom of her heart and was so full of purity that I was incredibly touched at that moment. A good week later, she gave up her fight and died.
I was not shocked, rigid, sad or depressed, but calmly aware. Death is a serious, individual event for everyone involved, but sadness did not dominate me, it accompanied me lovingly and I accepted all my pain without suffering. Many positive feelings arose: relief, affection and above all gratitude, even though my mother and I had a difficult relationship for most of our lives.
I am happy that my mother and I had already started to make peace with the past a few years ago. Even if appearances often suggest otherwise, there are always issues between parents and children and that is probably how it has to be. Resolving my issues and reconciling with her as a mother and a person made her passing easier for me. I was able to let her go with love without feeling that things had not yet been resolved. The reason for this is quite simple: we were and are at peace with ourselves.
In addition to my experiences, this book also contains my personal beliefs. These are based on Christian, Asian and Indian teachings, as well as knowledge of heart-based coaching. This book therefore also includes my spiritual views. All of this has given my life an invaluable depth for several years. For me, they are the truth and I am happy if you can benefit from them. Perhaps one day your mother, father or another loved one will say to you on their way home: "We have told each other everything." I hope so for you!
In March 2024
Florian Scherbauer
The Time: A phenomenon
The death of a loved one confronts us with our OWN dwindling lifespan. Every breath brings us a little closer to our own passing and if we are honest, we find it difficult to accept the truth that our own life can end at any time.
Time is a purely earthly phenomenon. We cannot avoid it and we become dependent on it. Having a lot of time is not necessarily viewed as positive in society and not having much time has been a trend that has been going on for decades. People who do not have much time deserve recognition because, according to the prevailing opinion, they achieve a lot. Some people also talk about it in great detail (unsolicited) and emphasize their leadership skills to the outside world.
But what seems really interesting is what you actually do with your time. There are many lifestyle trends here, such as the work-life balance that is currently attracting a lot of attention. I ask the questions: aren't you living at work? Isn't life also work? Does implementing a work-life balance really create more time and meaning in life?
Life is constantly happening and that is how it is intended. It is about dealing with yourself and your life at all times. Of course, that is not possible all day long, because we have to look after our family, work, shop, clean up, eat, sleep, etc. But one thing is clear: a satisfied person will not talk about the money they have accumulated or professional successes at the end of their life, but the really important memories will emerge: moments of relief, reconciliations, beautiful family celebrations, love relationships, funny events, moving experiences, etc. Such events cannot be programmed in time. They are situations that happen at a heart level.
In the final stages of life, many people have the desire to make peace with family members or situations. The heart longs to put something right so that any perceived damage can be repaired. But now time is really short and only the bare essentials can be resolved. I therefore think it is a good idea to start making peace earlier, because then you still have enough time to change as much as possible and can reap the rewards while the parents are still alive. I will go into this in more detail later, but assume that as an adult child you can and may begin the steps to resolve the points of conflict yourself.
From a universal perspective, time is not important. I find this fact comforting, because what would it be like to be in paradise or hell forever? We imagine that to be boring, and maybe it would be. The higher authority, whatever it may be called for you, does not know time. If we assume that there is an indelible soul, it is of little importance to it when the changing situations are created. The only thing that matters is that they happen. So don't be disappointed in yourself if, for example, you do not start reconciling with your parents until you are 60. On the contrary: This is a very brave step and should only be seen in the best light.
Life: The most significant circumstance