Apostrophe Catastrophe E-Book

Patrick C. Notchtree

• Herausgeber: The History Press
• Kategorie: Bildung
• Sprache: Englisch

Seitenzahl: 79

Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2015

Beschreibung

The apostrophe causes more problems in the English language than any other aspect of grammar. Grown adults with a university education don't know how to use it properly, and our high streets are filled with hilarious examples of its misuse. Join the pedants as they revolt against the misuse of this essential piece of punctuation and with one simple rule learn how to use the apostrophe correctly – once and for all.

Leseprobe

CONTENTS

Title

Introduction

One Easy Rule

Possessives

The Olden Days

The Book of Cassius

Test Yourself

Some Other Grammatical Grumbles

Frequently Asked Questions

Postscript

By the Same Author

Copyright

INTRODUCTION

They cause arguments. They go missing when they should be there, and they litter the place when they shouldn’t. Market traders – greengrocers especially – are renowned for flinging them about with careless abandon. Some people want to ban them altogether. Others go to the extremes of pedantry in trying to keep them. Almost everybody makes them much more complicated than they need to be.

Apostrophes. Puzzled by them? Frustrated by them? Frightened of them, even? Worry not, because all is about to be revealed. By going back to the roots of the language and understanding why we use those little things, all will be made clear, and instead of a complicated system of varying rules for varying circumstances, you will realise from now on that there is just one rule. Yes, just one.

ONE EASY RULE

The apostrophe must be the most misunderstood and misused piece of punctuation in the English language. This is worsened by the fact that most people simply fail to understand what it does, and make it unnecessarily complicated. The result is that many people, in an effort to appear correct, use a scattergun approach, dropping in apostrophes every time the letter ‘s’ ends a word – for plurals, possessives and contractions alike.

In fact, using the apostrophe correctly is easy – once you know the rule.

Notice I say ‘the’ rule. Despite the confusion about this and many variations, there is, in fact, just one place where an apostrophe is used. Just one. It really is easy to remember:

Use an apostrophe when letters are missing.

I have taught many children, mainly Year 6 (aged 10–11), this method over many years and 90 per cent of them have ‘got it’ immediately and never get it wrong again.

Explaining something in written form is not the same as interactive teaching, where the listeners respond and the teacher can adapt as they go along. I have tried to take this step by step and cover all the angles, but it means there is a lot of reading to do. Please be patient.

© www.dreaded-apostrophe.com

Those of you who were taught a multi-rule method (presumably unsuccessfully or why would you be here?) are probably now puzzled. How can there be just one rule which covers all uses of the dreaded apostrophe? I repeat:

Use an apostrophe when letters are missing.

Misuse often occurs where plurals are involved. Plural simply means more than one. So we see the famous greengrocer signs like:

Carrot’s cheap today

But there is nothing missing here – it just means more than one carrot – so it should read:

Carrots cheap today

Another example:

Parent’s are asked to supervise their children

Again, nothing is missing; it is a request to more than one parent to look after their kids. The correct form is:

Parents are asked to supervise their children

But the children belong to the parents, you say. True, no doubt, but the two words are not together in the sentence and the message is directed at parents, not children. Parents children would need an apostrophe – but before or after the ‘s’? Have no fear, all will be explained later.

So where do we use an apostrophe?

We use an apostrophe when letters are missing.

I will look at the obvious cases first. These are where we deliberately shorten a word or phrase and then use an apostrophe to show that letters are missing.

These are called contractions.

© www.dreaded-apostrophe.com

© www.dreaded-apostrophe.com

In full

Letters missing

Shortened form

can not

no

can’t

could not

o

couldn’t

do not

o

don’t

I am

a

I’m

it has

ha

it’s

it is

i

it’s

let us

u

let’s

that is

i

that’s

they are

a

they’re

they had

ha

they’d

was not

o

wasn’t

we had

ha

we’d

what is

i

what’s

would not

o

wouldn’t

you are

a

you’re

you would

woul

you’d

my car is there

i

my car’s there

the coat is on the peg

i

the coat’s on the peg

The list above does not contain every possible abbreviated form, but from that one can see how the apostrophe goes in place of the missing letters. Missing spaces do not get an apostrophe. Think of it this way: it was a space so there was nothing to go missing in the first place.

People often confuse you’re and your. But now you know the rule, you need never confuse them again. You’re is short for You are, while your means belonging to you, as in ‘Your head is probably spinning by now’.

© www.dreaded-apostrophe.com

There, their and they’re are often confused but there is a place, their means belonging to them and they’re is short for they are.

English is a living language, and all such languages contain irregularities. One which is relevant to apostrophe usage is it’s and its. It’s is short for it is or it has as you see in the table above. Its means belonging to it, as in ‘It’s probably spun off its neck by now’. If you are uncertain which to use, say it in full, e.g. ‘The world spins on it is axis’ is plainly silly, so one should use its rather than it’s.

Contractions – the shortening of words and phrases – is a common use of the apostrophe to show where letters have been left out. Most people get that and understand it fairly well. A lot of the confusion arises of the use of the dreaded apostrophe to show belonging, possession and similar relationships.

I have mentioned belonging already. So what about possessives? It is in fact the same rule.

POSSESSIVES

PLURAL INITIALS

How often have you seen signs that say CD’s for sale or similar? The MP’s voted against the bill is another example.

These are plurals, nothing is missing, so the correct form is CDs and MPs. If your child writes that he or she gained four As at A level, be pleased also that he or she knows when not use an apostrophe. If they tell you they got four A’s, I just hope English was not one of them!

This is by far where most of the confusion arises. Panic sets in as people think, ‘Where shall I put the dreaded apostrophe?’ But there is no need to panic. Keep calm; it’s only an apostrophe. The same rule applies:

Use an apostrophe when letters are missing.

First, though, a little definition for readers for whom some time has passed since they were taught grammar, if at all. When we talk about nouns, these are the names of things, objects, etc. Table, dog, coat, child – these are all nouns. They don’t have to be physical objects – dream, idea, thought are also nouns.

There are also pronouns – words that stand in for nouns: he, she, they, it. Each of these has a possessive form: his, her, their and its. That last one causes a lot of confusion, but more about its and it’s later.

Other types of word are verbs, which are actions such as walk, run, think, often called ‘doing words’.

Nouns and verbs can be modified or described. Adjectives are words that describe nouns: big table, small dog, black coat, noisy child, bad dream, good idea, clever thought and so on. Adverbs are words that describe verbs and often end in ly: walk slowly, run quickly, think carefully. I include these for the sake of completeness but adverbs don’t usually cause a problem when it comes to apostrophes.

© www.dreaded-apostrophe.com

There is a class of nouns called Proper Nouns. Note I’ve used capital letters. This is because these are the names of people and places, etc. and so have capital letters; London, Stephen, America, Susan, Titanic, Seattle, Melbourne and so on. Notice Titanic got in there. The word ‘ship’ is a noun but ships usually have names, and those names are Proper Nouns, hence Titanic, Nautilus and so on.

Nouns can be singular or plural. Singular means there is just one: girl, boy, ship, coat. If we are writing about more than one of these – girls, boys, ships, coats – this is the plural form. Nothing is missing here so no apostrophe is needed. Adding the letter s is the most common way to make a noun plural in English. Some nouns remain the same in the plural form – sheep, deer for example. Others have plural forms going back to the roots of modern English, such as child of which the plural is children. But these different forms do not affect the way in which we use the dreaded apostrophe to show possession. It’s still the same rule:

Use an apostrophe when letters are missing.

To understand this, we need first to take a trip back in time …