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It started with a laugh, a lighthearted jest. But the descent was swift and brutal, a rollercoaster plummeting into the darkest recesses of a tormented mind. Alcohol offered false solace, while the twisted voices within stoked an all-consuming need: to know if the carefully constructed world of your thoughts and beliefs aligned with the elusive inner life of Aurora. This wasn't a simple infatuation destined to fade; it metastasized into something immense, a fragile territory where fact and fiction became indistinguishable. Each spin on this chaotic merry-go-round scattered seeds of paranoia, poisoning the nascent stages of love and forcing uncomfortable moral questions into the light. Does Aurora truly see the intricate workings of your mind? Can she ever comprehend the weight of the sacrifices made to grant her a better existence? And will she ever understand the final, ultimate act undertaken in her name?
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Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2020
Aurora
Darren Hobson
Published by Darren Hobson at Bookrix
Copyright ©2019 Darren Hobson.
©2020 updated Darren Hobson.
As this book is written by the poet Darren Hobson it is most likely to contain foul language that most adults use in their daily life, but when these fucking words are written down in a cunt of a book only then do these words become offensive. It is obviously not the poets intention to shock without a proper reason but as this poet is actually writing about real life and it’s daily dark dose of cruel reality then foul language will be generously sprinkled like parmesan on your warmed up overcooked dinners.
We all want to escape from the daily routine of life, if someone says they enjoy being at work and enjoy being at home then they are lying. Some people love their work but despise being at home, for some other lazy fucker they hate work and prefer to lounge around their living room all day.
For me I don’t like being at home and being obliged to do the daily choirs and I definitely don’t being at work following someone else’s rules so I am stuck in limbo, I am not one of those modern men who go to the gym or strips down to my micro trunks to swim in a piss infested swimming pool.
After a day of work I generally opt for a beer or two, I always have it might be a pub, a café or something along the lines but they have to serve me alcohol without charging me half my wage, this is where I come in contact with the real people I observe the customers and the owners and they end up in my books.
I also find myself talking to the bar staff and the waitresses as you do, some are more flirty than others some are stoned faced and sterile, the problem is while you are trying hard not to overthink, you are trying hard to drown your sorrows, it’s a very dangerous situation as the lines of reality and fantasy blur, so the more you drink trying to stop the voices in your head the more wild your fantasies become. You have to realize that she is just playing, just joking and making a fool out of you because she is bored shitless and can’t wait to go see her skinny little boyfriend after work.
Overthinkers though always have a card ready to play, it’s the what if card.
Darren Hobson Nettuno 2020
I promised myself not to walk down this road anymore
But as my bones age and weaknesses grow
I tried so hard not to break what I promised myself
But I felt my barriers melt like autumn snow
One bad habit collides with another
One bad mistake leads to another bad lover
Trying to step out of the never-ending ferocious circle
One more time for old times’ sake
I tried to ignore you but you were always near
Every corner I turned you was always there
Life always has always got a trick up its sleeve
It showed me a ghost of what could be
But that is the point don’t you see
She could never be anything to me
Far too young and far too good to mention
She blew a hole in my mind
And it got called infatuation
She was teasing everyone all the time
I suppose being young and cheeky isn’t a crime
I tried to breathe and I tried to look away
But she kept colliding with me every single day
Don’t call it by anything else don’t call it fate
I wasn’t the person foolishly inserting himself into a web
Before I knew it, it was way too late
I sent myself to permanent detention
And it got called infatuation
Don’t blame me because I just happened to be there
One thousand miles from reality out in nowhere
I just wanted a drink and forget who I really am
Let the arguments run free in this worm of a man
It’s been a long time since I made someone smile
You would chew me up in seconds, discarded on a pile
You didn’t need my wit or old-time attention
You certainly didn’t need my sickly infatuation
I pulled myself up but I couldn’t bear to look down
I was on the merry-go-round without a sound
All the cheeky bloody kids mocked me aloud
I felt so alienated and the least bit proud
So why do I do when I am in touching distance of you
Why do I get so frustrated just trying to talk to you?
You call me names and you laugh into my face
Have you got an antivirus for my infatuation?
I look in the mirror behind you and I try not to stare
I get angry with myself for keeping myself so near
I drink some poison to erase the poison that is you
Why is it that I am always thinking about you?
When you have the lemon knife pointing at my throat
You murmur under your breath ancient curses from earth
You think I am just an object that you can punch at will
I think all this infatuation is making me ill
You lower your guard and flash a smile once more
Knowing that I was heading out and searching for the door
The stupid idiot of me accepts just another expensive cold beer
She wants to continue to torture me in here
How could I let her win all over again?
Every bloody night it’s the same goddamn game
It just leads to some more dirty frustration
Everyone can see my infatuation.
My claws were broken away a long time ago
My heart is so frozen in my mind only snow
My soul is a multifracture I am all the rage
Looks like I was born on the wrong side of the page
So, don’t turn me over because I’m a nasty motherfucker
Don’t ever underline me or try to undermine me
If you crease one of my corners I will come back to haunt you
Don’t tear me out until you know what I’m about
When the author set his mind on writing one more book
He needed a character that was way down on his luck
The type of person that would always be one paragraph away
That’s were I was written on the wrong side of the page
My eyesight use to be normal before my life became abnormal
I used to have taste until pussy love ripped the taste buds from me,
I use to get my teeth into any steak that would do
Now the doctor's advice is I should be drinking from a paper straw
So, don’t you come over giving me some manly advice
That is when I get hysterically when I promise I won’t be nice
When they thought of me it's when they unlocked my cage
Guess I was born on the wrong side of the page
So, Mr. author what is this infatuation you gave to me?
Why did you have to drop me into the deep end of love
Knowing that everywhere I looked that I could never see