I beat Depression E-Book

Eunice Higuchi

• Herausgeber: Unipro
• Kategorie: Religion und Spiritualität
• Sprache: Englisch

Seitenzahl: 70

Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2020

Beschreibung

Eunice Higuchi, a successful doctor, was a married mother of four beautiful children when she became depressed and saw her world collapse. A series of events struck her family and ended up ruining her emotional health. Eunice found herself at rock bottom. In search of a way out, she spent a lot of money, and her depressive condition got worse when a tragic event happened — her psychiatrist committed suicide. What do you do when the only person who can help you loses the fight against your greatest enemy? She knew that her illness had no cure, but she also knew that couldn't remain in such a state. Eunice sought a way out in religion and ventured into the most different beliefs and religious rituals. However, it was in the most unlikely place that she accidentally found the answer she was looking for. Immerse yourself in the story of a woman whose life was destroyed by the "evil of the century" and who from ashes, managed to rise again. Get to know the lessons she learnt, her experiences, and the steps Eunice Higuchi took in her fight to overcome depression.

Leseprobe

COPYRIGHT © 2019 UNIPRO EDITORA

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. NO PART OF THIS BOOK MAY BE REPRODUCED OR TRANSMITTED IN ANY FORM OR BY ANY MEANS, ELECTRONIC OR MECHANICAL, INCLUDING PHOTOCOPYING AND RECORDING, OR BY ANY INFORMATION STORAGE AND RETRIEVAL SYSTEM, WITHOUT PERMISSION IN WRITING FROM THE PUBLISHER.

SCRIPTURE QUOTATIONS TAKEN FROM THE MODERN ENGLISH VERSION. COPYRIGHT © 2014 BY MILITARY BIBLE ASSOCIATION. USED BY PERMISSION. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

GENERAL DIRECTOR: MARCOS XAVIER

MANAGING EDITOR: SANDRA GOUVÊA

TRANSLATOR: SANDRA GOUVÊA

ART DIRECTOR: PAULO JUNIOR

GRAPHIC DESIGN: LUIZ FELIPE KESSLER

COVER ART: DUDA STEOLA AND WILLIAN SOUZA

EDITORIAL ASSISTANT: GABRIELA ARRUDA

EPUB PRODUCTION: GABRIELA ARRUDA

H638 HIGUCHI, EUNICE.

I BEAT DEPRESSION / EUNICE HIGUCHI.

1st EDITION – SÃO PAULO; UNIPRO EDITORA, 2019.

ISBN 978-85-7140-976-7

1. DEPRESSION. 2. AUTOBIOGRAPHY I. SELF-HELP.

UNIPRO EDITORA DOES NOT TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR ANY ACCOUNTS OR OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE AUTHOR IN THIS BOOK. ALL INFORMATION CONTAINED HERE IN EXPRESSES THE AUTHOR`S VIEWPOINT. .

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CONTENTS

Introduction

The darkness in me

Hell in my family

Rise and fall

"Your psychiatrist committed suicide"

Looking for a change

Hope through the radio

"Dumped"

The weapons

What science ignores

Completely healed

In God's dependence

Salt?

Come out of the dark

How can you help someone who's depressed?

Bibliography

INTRODUCTION

“Get up!” “Get out of bed!” “Go to work!” “Your kids need you!”These were phrases I heard from relatives.

They wanted to help me because they saw how critical my situation was and often heard me say that I wanted to die. And I really wanted to. I could not bear living anymore.

For those who have never experienced depression, it is practically impossible to understand what happens. The person you once knew suddenly changes in such a way that you no longer recognise them. Depression takes over and they can no longer live like before.

I loved my profession and worked hard to get into medical school. I came from a poor family. My mother became a widow when I was 18 months old and my younger sister was just a few months old, in addition to my four older brothers. We were six children that my mother took care of alone.

My father was a Japanese immigrant. He made and sold plastic dolls in Brazil. He was an artist who painted and lived amongst other artists and hotshots in São Paulo. Because of his bohemian lifestyle, he eventually contracted tuberculosis, a common disease in urban regions at that time, and died at the age of 33.

My mother was of Brazilian and Japanese descent. She spent all the money we had on treatment for my father when he was admitted to hospital. We lived in misery. That’s why my brothers and I started working while we were still kids.

I have always worked hard and despite having studied in public schools, I managed to pass the medical entrance exam at the University of São Paulo. It is the most popular programme at this University. It was a dream for me to take this course.

After spending six years in college, I did my residency at the Clinical Hospital of the Medicine Faculty of the University of São Paulo (Hospital das Clínicas da Faculdade de Medicina da Universidade de São Paulo). With a lot of determination, studying, working hard, and sleeping very little, I achieved a successful career.

I worked as a paediatrician in a rural district of São Paulo where I constantly had a full waiting room. There were a large number of regular patients waiting for my consultations. I also worked as a health worker and served as the health director for the Department of Health in two municipalities.

This is an inspirational story about someone who managed to overcome, despite being raised in a poor and broken family. Although I accomplished many things in my professional and academic life, none of them was enough to give me the will to live. A whirlwind of problems in my personal life led me into a deep depression that took away the passion for my profession and everything else. Depression took the life out of me.

Today, 25 years after I overcame depression — without ever relapsing — I live a new reality, I have decided to share my journey to help all those who cannot see an end to their suffering. May this book help you to see that depression can be overcome.

One day, my daughter asked me why, on a hot summer’s day, would I keep the windows closed, stay in bed and isolate myself in complete darkness. “I don’t know, this is how I want to be, and I have heard many stories of people who are in the same situation, who do the exact same thing,” I told her.

The darkness I was in was not just a lack of physical light, but mainly a lack of hope. I could not see a way out of that condition. I no longer believed that happiness and love existed, at least not for me.

It was four years of depression. During this time, I lived the worst days of my life — as if I could call it life. I no longer had control over myself. I was a living dead. I felt as though I was on the edge of the abyss of death; I was suffering a lot.

Nothing gave me energy. What used to bring me joy had turned grey, dull. The most basic things such as getting up and brushing my teeth had become a burden, demanding a supernatural effort on my part.

Isolating myself was all that I had left to do. I stayed in a dark room, not wanting to see anyone, suffering alone, crying day and night, and feeling hopeless. Staying in the dark might not make sense but seeing the sun would not take away the darkness within me.

My hell of a life

Unlike physical illnesses such as heart disease and diabetes, when it comes to emotional illnesses, people tend to lessen the severity of the problem. “It’s just depression,” they say. Others think the person is being difficult, lazy, has nothing to do, and that when they simply decide that they no longer want to live in anguish, that’s it — they’ll be free! The reality of depression is far from this...

I had suicidal thoughts every day. The need to end all that suffering was enormous... “I can’t take it anymore, it’s too much pain, it’s unbearable… There’s no hope for me… I’ve tried everything… I don’t want to continue living… I need to end all this… This pain has to end,” were the thoughts that tormented me. I cried day and night. My face only conveyed sadness to those who lived with me.

My family members wanted me to get out of this state. They tried to help me, but they could not understand what was going on with me. I moved to my sister’s house and later rented an apartment with my children.

My mother came to live with me for a while to help take care of my children. She wanted the best for me, but she had no patience. She’d constantly tell me to get moving, but that made me feel even worse. It was not that I did not want to get up or that I was trying to be difficult. I had no strength.

I knew I needed to get out of that situation, that my children needed me, but I just couldn’t react. It was stronger than me, far beyond my strength. I couldn’t take care of myself anymore, let alone take care of others. I wanted to die.

I did not have a reason to continue living. I was sad. There was a deep void in my soul, an abyss within me, an endless pain... I did not have a reason to live at that moment, let alone to think about the future! I had no more dreams. The dreams I once had no longer seemed interesting. I had no reason to exist.

Bedtime was also a torment. I could not sleep and whenever I did, I had a lot of nightmares — terrible nightmares. I would wake up in the middle of the night, frightened, screaming and sweating with my heart racing. It was a horrible feeling. My children said it seemed as if something afflicted me during my sleep, making me have those terrible nightmares and causing me a lot of harm.

At that time, I completely lost my appetite. Nothing motivated me to eat, not even the dishes that I liked the most. I lost too much weight — I weighed 39 kilos. All my clothes were too big, and I had to make new holes in the belts, which no longer fitted my waist. A little longer and my body certainly could not stand that situation anymore.