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- Herausgeber: John Wiley & Sons
- Kategorie: Bildung
- Sprache: Englisch
Stand out like you're 7 feet tall -- how to think and act differently as a K-12 leader Tall people stand out in a crowd. Tall people think and act differently: people like author Steven Bollar. He has spent his career as a principal and administrator creating school cultures that make students excited to learn and achieve their goals. In Stand Tall Leadership, Steven shows you that it doesn't matter what your natural height really is--you can stand tall in everything you do by thinking and acting differently from those around you. Designed for K-12 leaders, this unique and engaging book helps you overcome challenges in your school, manage effectively, inspire your staff, build strong relationships, communicate clearly, and much more. The Stand Tall Leadership philosophy is all about creating the best possible environment at your school. Strong leadership skills are essential for making better decisions, maintaining your focus and priority, and maximizing outcomes with students, staff, parents, and the entire community. The principles and techniques in this book will strengthen your own leadership skills and assist you in developing effective leaders within your school. Providing hands-on tools and real-world guidance, this valuable resource will help you: * Connect with staff, understand their needs, and set them up for success * Keep your best employees and leaders right where they are, not chasing other opportunities * Assessyour leadership skills and make immediate, meaningful improvements * Maintain focus in any situation to increase productivity and get outstanding results * Repair damaged relationships that slow down progress and impede success Stand Tall Leadership: Stand Tall to Think Differently and Lead Successfully is a must-read for all K-12 leaders and administrators, as well as K-12 educators looking to develop their leadership skills.
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Seitenzahl: 386
Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2020
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Table of Contents
COVER
INTRODUCTION TO STAND TALL LEADERSHIP
CHAPTER ONE: Stand Tall Leaders Should Not Blend In
1.1. Stand Tall Traits of a Good Leader
1.2. Hide and Seek
1.3. Step It Up
1.4. Timing
1.5. Practice? It's Just Practice!
CHAPTER TWO: Stand Tall Leaders Have Influence
2.1. Influence
2.2. Integrity
2.3. Compliance vs. Commitment
Note
CHAPTER THREE: Stand Tall Leaders Get Results
3.1. The Results Formula
3.2. Don't Let a Good Crisis Go to Waste
3.3. Get It When You Don't Get It
3.4. Hallway Brand
CHAPTER FOUR: Stand Tall Leaders Value Relationships
4.1. Expectations
4.2. How to Move Past Unhealthy Expectations
4.3. Selflessness
4.4. The Top Four Ways to Maintain and Attract the Best Substitute Teachers
4.5. Retreat!
4.6. Reasons to NOT Recognize
4.7. I Just Cannot Help You
CHAPTER FIVE: Stand Tall Leaders Make Strategic, Smart, and Creative Decisions
5.1. What Is Climate and Culture?
5.2. Respect and Value
5.3. Climate
5.4. Culture
5.5. Decisions
5.6. Get Over It
5.7. The Power of Now
5.8. Efficiency vs. Effectiveness
CHAPTER SIX: Stand Tall Leaders Take Action
6.1. BADASS
6.2. One Action
CHAPTER SEVEN: Stand Tall Leaders Use Their Voice
7.1. Stand Tall Speaking
7.2. Parent Phone Communication
7.3. Uncomfortable Silence
CHAPTER EIGHT: Stand Tall Leaders Are Reflective
8.1. Hold on a Second
8.2. Stand Tall Professional Development
8.3. Standing Tall Words of Power
8.4. Three Sides of Leadership Growth
8.5. Be a Finisher!
ARE YOU A STAND TALL LEADER?
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
INDEX
END USER LICENSE AGREEMENT
Guide
Cover
Table of Contents
Begin Reading
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STAND TALL LEADERSHIP
Stand Tall to Think Differently and Lead Successfully
Steven A. Bollar
Copyright © 2020 John Wiley & Sons. All rights reserved.
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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Names: Bollar, Steven A., author.
Title: Stand tall leadership: stand tall to think differently and lead successfully / Steven A. Bollar.
Description: Hoboken, NJ: Jossey-Bass, 2020. | Includes index.
Identifiers: LCCN 2020022307 (print) | LCCN 2020022308 (ebook) | ISBN 9781119638896 (paperback) | ISBN 9781119638964 (adobe pdf) | ISBN 9781119638919 (epub)
Subjects: LCSH: Educational leadership. | School management and organization.
Classification: LCC LB2806 .B586 2020 (print) | LCC LB2806 (ebook) | DDC 371.2—dc23
LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2020022307
LC ebook record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2020022308
Cover Design: Wiley
Cover Image: Courtesy of Steven A. Bollar
Printed in the United States of America
FIRST EDITION
Introduction to Stand Tall Leadership
Obviously, Stand Tall Leadership has something to do with being tall, or not being tall enough, or a desire to be tall. What's the hook? There has to be more to it. If that is what you're thinking, you are kind of right. There is a connection to me being tall. Personally, I am 6′7″ tall. I have been this height since my first year in college. I was 6′6″ and then jumped one inch in college, lucky me. I look like I walked right off the college basketball courts into the NBA. Throughout most of my life, being a taller person was just something that I lived with. At times I loved it and at times I hated it. It isn't something that I could run away from. Just like you, your height is something that was given to you by your parents and ancestors. There isn't much you can do about it. But unlike most people my height started to truly define who I was as a person and ultimately as a leader within the schools.
Becoming a tall person wasn't something that I wanted. I fought the process as much as possible. Eighth grade was the year that everything went nuts. At the start of eight grade I was 5′8″. At the end of eight grade I was 6′3″. Basically, puberty kicked in and beat the hell out of me. I was constantly in pain. All of my joints hurt. I started having back pain. At night I would have muscle cramps so bad that I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to get up the next morning. Because I was growing so quickly and standing out from my friends, I started to slouch. I hunched my shoulders over and bent. I figured that if I did this I wouldn't stand out as much as I was.
One day during my eighth-grade year I was walking home from school with Danielle. Where I grew up, everybody walked home from school. Danielle and I kind of liked each other, so we would walk home together most days. I lived on Ninth Street and Danielle lived on Seventh Street. Once we turned onto Seventh Street, Danielle said, “Steve, stop.”
I said, “Stop why?”
She said, “Just stop where you are.”
I said, “Okay, why?”
She walked around behind me, and I was thinking, “What are you doing?”
She said, “Just stay still.” She took one hand and put it on my shoulder. She took her other hand, balled it up into a fist, and punched me in the middle of my back.
I arched my back and yelled, “Girl, are you crazy?”
She said, “You are a tall person. Stop slouching and trying to be small – STAND TALL!”
At that moment it clicked. Everything changed in my entire world. I stood there and stared at her and I realized I wasn't being who I was supposed to be. Just to give you some perspective… my father is six foot six, my mother five foot nine, my brother is six foot six. I'm going to be tall! This is happening! Regardless if I was fighting it or not. When she punched me in the back, I realized I was not becoming who I was supposed to be.
I also realized that I was a leader. I was in student council, Boy Scouts, band, art club. I had leadership positions within them. People looked to me, they listened to me, and they observed the things that I did. I also realized that leaders are not supposed to blend in. Leaders are supposed to STAND TALL. Not necessarily physically tall, but within their actions and relationships. Standing Tall is all about your state of mind and how you operate within the world around you.
The start of my career was as a lower elementary visual arts teacher. Yes, kindergarten to third grade visual arts teacher. The little guys barely came up to my hip. I must admit, I did step on a few of them down there. They were just so small, and they move so quickly, it's hard not to step on a few and knock a couple down from time to time. I truly enjoyed being an art teacher. It was a dream job. Basically, every day I would host a party every 40 minutes throughout the day. Additionally, I was growing as an artist. My illustrations were being purchased and I even owned a mural painting business. As a visual arts teacher, I realized very quickly that my height was an amazement to the students and families. The students saw me as a giant. Most of the learning spaces within the school were designed for the little people. For me to maneuver and work within those spaces was difficult at times. In the beginning, the families were shocked that I was there. You don't often see a 6′7″ African American man teaching visual arts in a predominately white lower elementary school. Teaching at that school was a different learning experience for me on many levels. Eventually, I moved to the upper elementary school within the same district and then became the supervisor of visual and performing arts.
Most of my professional career was as a school principal. Fifteen years to be exact. There was some time as a curriculum supervisor, assistant superintendent, director, and superintendent. But the bulk of my time within the world of education was in the role as a principal. I must admit, I loved every second! There is nothing like heading your own building. The reason I became an administrator was because I didn't like administrators. I found them to be unimaginative, unwilling to take risks, uncollaborative, and just way too stiff. Usually you would think that if this is the norm for administrators, I'll just stay far away from it. Not me! My goal was to change what I saw in school administration. My goal as an administrator and specifically as a principal was to be creative, take smart risks, collaborate with others, and just loosen up.
As I moved through my career as a school principal, I continually made the connection between how I lived my life as a tall person and the leadership as a building principal. I was amazed at how the things that I did in order to adjust my life to fit within the world as a tall person and as a creative artist assisted me as a leader. Over many years I came to the understanding of what I now call Stand Tall Leadership. It is a blend of beliefs and lifestyles of tall people, the creativeness and risk of artists, and the practicality and strength of a school principal. Ultimately, it breaks down into nine areas that lead to the philosophy of Stand Tall Leadership:
Stand Tall Leaders Should Not Blend In
Stand Tall Leaders Have Influence
Stand Tall Leaders Get Results
Stand Tall Leaders Value Relationships
Stand Tall Leaders Make Strategic, Smart, and Creative Decisions
Stand Tall Leaders Take Action
Stand Tall Leaders Use Their Voice
Stand Tall Leaders Are Reflective
Stand Tall Leaders Have Vision
Throughout this book we will explore each of these areas as it relates to the world of tall people and the role of being a school administrator, specifically a building principal. It will blend between developing strategies to improve, personal reflection, how to help others, and just have fun and be creative. Many of the areas of focus can be implemented into your life well beyond the role of principal and administrator in a school. Look at your life overall. See how it can help, improve, or maintain areas that you want to become better.
My motto is, “When you stand TALL you don't think small.” This statement is the backbone of Stand Tall Leadership. A giraffe is the tallest land animal on the planet. The giraffe only knows how to see the world from the perspective that it has. It operates through the world confidently. It sees everything around. It has a level of vision and perspective that is unique. It knows so much more about the world that it lives in because of its perspective. The giraffe is unable to think like a gazelle. It does not have the lower level of vision like the gazelle. The giraffe operates at a much different level. The giraffe can see potential threats, food, and can answer the eternal tall question, “How's the weather up there?” This is true with Stand Tall Leaders. Once you see the world from a taller perspective … Once you see your role as a leader from a taller perspective … Once you experience your life from a taller perspective. You are unable to think small ever again … You now know what it is like. You know how to operate at a different level. Stand Tall Leadership will provide you that opportunity to see the world of school leadership at a new perspective. It doesn't matter if you are 4′3″ or 7′2″, you can Stand Tall as a leader and in your life. It's all a matter of perspective.
When you Stand TALL, you don't think small.
#standtallstatement
Stand Tall Statements
Throughout the book I've added “Stand Tall Statements” that highlight some of the book's main themes, ideas, and takeaways. All of the Stand Tall Statements are Twitter-friendly and include the hashtag #standtallstatement. Please join me in the social media conversation about the Stand Tall Statement you found most helpful. Here's an example of a Stand Tall Statement.
Stand Tall Ideas
Here's the deal. As a school leader we are continually looking for new, fresh, and original ideas to improve our schools. We attend workshops and conferences with the hope of locating and finding a different way of doing what we do. Many times, we go to get training or go to a conference and we hear ideas that just reaffirm what it is that we already know, or the outcome of the idea isn't impactful enough to make the effort to do it. On the other hand, there are times that we hear amazing ideas, but we are unwilling to put forth the effort to actually do the idea properly so that we get the proper outcomes. Every now and then we get that one idea that is perfect! The ideas that we can easily or quickly implement into our leadership that will provide the outcomes that we are hoping for.
The opposite becomes true as well. We attend conferences and get a TON of amazing ideas that can be implemented quickly and effectively. We leave each training or session with pages and pages of notes. Each idea is better than the last idea. You are pumped up and excited about how your school and leadership will be transformed almost overnight. The people you meet and the conversations you have are rich with professionalism and pedagogy. There are others who think the same way you do, and you vow to stay in touch and keep the synergy going. Then when you get back to your school, reality kicks in. You put down your notebook and start working on the daily tasks that you usually do. You may do one or two follow-up emails with that other amazing leader you met, but eventually you lose touch. After about a month or two, you come across your notes and read them through. Your thought is, “Oh yeah, that was a good idea. It's too late now to start that.”
This was what I experienced for years as an administrator. I would attend conferences continually searching for that one idea or get a ton of ideas and never do anything with it. I found my notes with tons and tons of ideas in them, but never did anything. I started to really think about what to do with them. I decided to take all of these ideas and turn them into a keynote, training, and workshop. I realized that educational leaders were looking for these ideas. They wanted to find that one idea that could work. Additionally, I started to figure out the best way to move from gathering a bunch of ideas in a notebook into real actionable items that can actually happen within my leadership. Therefore, throughout this book I will share a plethora of realistic and actionable ideas that can be easily implemented into your leadership and school to help improve the climate, culture, and relationships. By improving the climate, culture, and relationships throughout the school you will ultimately improve your leadership. Your level of influence will expand extensively.
Here's an example of a Stand Tall Idea.
Stand Tall Idea
High-Five Monday
At the entrance of the school, every Monday morning have a different group give high fives to students entering the building. Be sure to have music and bubbles as well. If you don't have different groups, you do it! The groups could be sports groups or clubs. Be sure to preassign the week they need to do it and have someone send a reminder out on the Friday before you start. It's a great way to kick off the week.
CHAPTER ONEStand Tall Leaders Should Not Blend In
One thing that we all can agree on is that tall people don't blend in. When you look into a crowd of people, it is very easy to point out the tall people. Their heads seem to pop out from those around them. Usually, you see them bending down and back up again often. That is so they can talk and hear what is being said by all the “little” people around them. As a tall person, we are very aware that we do not blend in with those around us. We get that we need to make some alterations and changes to ourselves and surrounding in order to make our environment work. For example, the standard chair height is 18″, which is designed for people up to 6″1″. Therefore, anyone over 6′1″ needs to make some adjustments. Don't even get me started with airplane seats.
We also know that as a tall person we have a different view of the world from everyone else. What we see isn't what everyone else sees. Yes, that does give us an advantage. If we attend a concert, we rarely see the back of people's heads. It is a perfect view every time. When in a crowd of people if you ever need to get somewhere take your tall friend with you. He or she will be able to see the best way to get to the exit or restroom. It's like having GPS in a crowd. Having that level of vision and awareness is normal within the world of tall people.
When tall people speak, people listen. I think it's like a natural animal instinct. The bigger and taller the beast, the more authority it has. Therefore, others look to that bigger and taller beast and assume that the beast has something valuable to say or roar. I've found it rather peculiar how at times others ask my opinion on a topic or within a discussion that I have no part in. It happens more so when I'm standing than sitting. The physical presence and the desire to hear what the tall guy has to say is strong.
I truly believe that teachers and education are the last noble profession on earth. I also believe that every teacher, administrator, and support person within a school is a leader in some way. Whether you lead other adults or students within a classroom, you are perceived as a leader. The students and others within the school and community are watching what you do and watching what you don't do. The question becomes, what kind of leader will you show them? This chapter will focus on what makes a leader stand tall. A Stand Tall Leader doesn't blend in with others around them. You can pick them out of a crowd right away. A Stand Tall Leader has a different view of the world from everyone else. A Stand Tall Leader speaks, and others take notice. How does that happen? Even if the Stand Tall Leader is only 5′1″ with heels, it is all about how the Stand Tall Leader thinks, behaves, and acts on a daily basis.
Teachers and education are the last noble profession on earth.
#standtallstatement
Have you ever met a leader who was just like everyone else? If you did, I'm sure that the leader wasn't very successful as a leader. Who wants a leader who is the same as everyone else? If you do, you obviously don't want to grow as an organization. You are happy with just the way things are. What good is that? Yes, you want to have a leader who is relatable, understands your needs, and has similar interests, but just like everyone else? I don't think so.
1.1. Stand Tall Traits of a Good Leader
What makes a good leader? I ask this question when I give my Stand Tall Leadership seminars, speeches, or workshops. During the workshops, the participants have the opportunity to talk with their groups and report back what they believe what a good leader is. Over the many years of doing this, four distinct areas continually come up from educators that define leadership:
Visionary
Great communicator
Makes difficult decisions
Makes others better
Let's look at each one.
1.1.1. Visionary
Elena Aguilar wrote,
A visionary leader is clear about what he or she believes and knows is best for children – for their academic, social, and emotional learning. The leader's individual beliefs have developed in collaboration with other stakeholders and articulated into some kind of vision or mission statement.
I find that statement to be true and nearly complete. Yes, a visionary educational leader is clear about belief and what is best for children, but according to the thousands of educators who I have trained, it is that and being able to develop an image or picture of what the school, district, or program could be and therefore able to share that vision with others so that they can all move forward toward that vision. Having a vision or mission statement means nothing if others don't believe in that vision. Others have to be able to see that vision. It has to become real and obtainable. As stated earlier, Stand Tall Leaders are able to see things differently. They have a different perspective of the world from those around them. As much as that is a benefit of a visionary Stand Tall Leader, it does not carry much weight if the Stand Tall Leader is unable to share that vision with others. The goal is to have vision and share with others so that they can move forward together. If a leader is able to do that, does that leader blend in with everyone else or stand out and stand tall?
Having a vision or mission statement means nothing if others don't believe in that vision.
#standtallstatement
1.1.2. Great Communicator
There are so many books and articles about being a great communicator. We hear terms like listen more and speak less, use less words, be clear, watch nonverbal communication, and be genuine. All of them are correct. I am sure you could identify several more traits that make a good communicator. No matter what communication traits you list, it comes down to being able to clearly state what you want and getting others to do it or understand it.
Each organization has its own climate, culture, and history. That will determine what type of communication works best for the people within the organization. There may be a very open and cheerful climate and less formality is necessary when communicating, and the leader may be able to continually speak openly without worry of offense or misinterpretations. The climate may be very traditional and formal where all communication from the leader needs to be doublechecked and within the guidelines of policy and contracts. The organization may have a history of leaders who have communicated poorly so there is a lack of trust about what is being said. There might be a perception that there is a hidden agenda behind every statement. The ultimate goal of a Stand Tall Leader is understanding that no matter what type of environment the organization has, it must be able to clearly identify what the climate, culture, and history is like and then communicate in a way that would allow those within the organization to understand what the leader wants and be able to do it well.
A Stand Tall Leader takes the time necessary to think carefully about what is being said and the implications of what is said. There is nothing wrong with stating that you need time to think and respond appropriately. It is better to wait and speak with power than to rush and speak with uncertainty.
With that said, I ask: Is that a common trait of leadership? If someone is able to understand the climate, culture, and history of an organization and communicate in a way that gets people to act, does that person blend in with everyone else, or does he, she stand out and stand tall?
It is better to wait and speak with power than to rush and speak with uncertainty.
#standtallstatement
1.1.3. Makes Difficult Decisions
There is a difference between making decisions and making difficult decisions. When educators were asked about traits of a leader, most of them stated that leaders make decisions. Then when I clarified and stated that leaders make difficult decisions, most would hum and nod their heads in agreement. Therefore, even though making decisions was the most popular statement, making difficult decisions was the most impactful statement.
Seriously, let's think about this. Everyone makes decisions. You have to decide if you are going to get out of bed every day. You have to decide if you are going to say good morning to someone else. You have to decide what to eat each day. Making decisions is too common an action to say about a leader. It truly comes down to making the difficult decisions that others do not want to make. Way back when I was a new administrator, I remember sitting in a meeting with a student, school counselor, and angry parent. They were all staring at me waiting for me to decide whether the student was going to be suspended. Mom had a scowl, the student looked afraid, and the school counselor had a look like, “Come on, man! You can do this!” At that moment, I realized the importance of making hard decisions as a leader.
Making hard decisions isn't easy, but someone has to do it. Some people tend to pull others into the issue so that they don't have to make the hard decisions alone and it's not all on them. Leaders don't always have the opportunity to do that. Yes, they might get the input from others to help them, but it usually rests on their shoulders. Later on, in the book I'll share with you specifically the five levels of decision-making. Not only do leaders have to make the hard decisions but they have to stick to them and make sure that others stick with their decisions. With that said, I ask again: Is that a common trait? Walk into difficult situations on a regular basis, make difficult decisions, and get others to follow those decisions. Does that person blend in with everyone else, or does he, she stand out and stand tall as a Leader?
Making hard decisions isn't easy, but someone has to do it.
#standtallstatement
1.1.4. Make Others Better
We would not be in education if we didn't want to improve the world around us. Specifically, making other people better than what they are. When educators talk about this in my workshops, they frame it as leaders helping those under them become better within their subject, with instruction, mentoring, and setting the example for others to follow. Basically, making others better through their own actions. Everyone within a school needs something different from the leader. Yes, even the 40-year veteran teacher who doesn't talk to anyone. A great leader understands the needs of those within the organization. Either individually, within groups, specific pockets, or as a whole. Being able to gain that understanding and then acting on it is a skill that not many people have. The interesting thing about leaders trying to make others better is that leaders might think they are doing a great job but are failing miserably. I am sure you have either experienced moments or know situations where the organization is failing miserably but the leader is trucking along completely unaware, thinking that everything is growing by leaps and bounds. That level of being completely unaware isn't leadership. It is the inability to self-assess and make personal changes to ensure that the growth of others is taking place in the right directions. The most successful leaders are able to self-assess and properly connect their actions to the needs of others so that each person grows. With that said, I ask: Is that a common trait? Does that person blend in with everyone else, or does he, she stand out and stand tall?
The most successful leaders are able to self-assess and properly connect their actions to the needs of others so that each person grows.
#standtallstatement
Think about the leaders that you admire. It doesn't matter if you know them or not. Do they Stand Tall?
Do they have a vision and are they able to share that vision with others in order to move people toward success?
Are they a great communicator by understanding the culture of an organization and molding their messages so that it is clearly understood?
Do they step up and make the hard decisions when it is time and stand by those decisions?
Are they making others better through continual self-assessment and personalized connections?
Think about yourself as a leader. Do you blend in with every other person in your organization? If the answer is yes, take a moment and think about how you are implementing the above into your leadership. If you noticed, none of them have to do with how tall you are. They do have everything to do with how you Stand Tall. Are you a Stand Tall Leader?
Stand Tall Action
Question people within your organization about what your vision is. If they are unable to explain it, adjust your communication style so that everyone knows it.
1.2. Hide and Seek
Tall people can't play hide and seek very well. There is just something about that game that doesn't work for us. Unless there is a tree or column around, we just can't seem to find a hiding spot. The only good thing about the game, depending on how you play it, is once found, we can usually outrun, reach, or tag the person who found them in order to not be “it.” But to be honest, I rather be “it” anyway. If I'm “it,” I don't have to worry about finding a place to hide. It is just too much pressure. Many times, when I would play hide and seek, I would purposely get found. “Oh darn, you found me… what a shame… I guess I'm it now…”
Tall people are always seen. They don't blend in with those around them. As much as I think that I don't stand out, I do. I am always on. Sure, I can walk around as if nobody can see me, but I know differently. The first thing they think when they see me is, “Wow, he is tall. I wonder if he plays basketball?” There are many times I don't want to be in the spotlight. I do want to play hide and don't seek. That time to hide and don't seek is valuable to me. It is time that I use to think, be alone, and make plans for what I want to do. Many shorter people take that opportunity for granted. It is common to blend in with the crowd and not stand out. Many people go out of their way to be noticed. But when your entire life revolves around people noticing you, blending in becomes something that you long for.
Many educational leaders have an open-door policy. Just to be clear, an open-door policy is the act of a leader literally or figuratively having your door open so that those under you can come in when they need to meet informally, share ideas, or discuss issues at any time. I remember interviewing for different administrative positions in the past, stating that I pride myself on having an open-door policy. Having an open-door policy is good in theory, but it lends itself to preventing you from getting any work done. Basically, you are a tall person on display all the time.
The thought of having an open-door policy is nice. You can imagine your staff coming into your office with a frown and after they talk with you, they leave with a smile. All of your staff loves you and you are the solver of many of their issues and problems. That may sound nice, but it just isn't reality. In truth, the staff come in at the moment you are trying to finish writing a difficult evaluation. They pop in when you are gathering your notes from a complicated parent meeting. They show up when you have to finalize your budget for the year before 3:00 p.m. and it's already 2:15 p.m. Each time someone comes into your “open door,” you smile and offer an ear and your advice. How in the world can you get anything done? As a building principal, there were times I thought that if I heard, “You got a minute?” or “Are you busy?” one more time, I might just slap someone.
That does it! I'm shutting my door, and nobody can bother me. Slam!! After about 10 minutes of work… “knock, knock, knock.” Who could that be? Can't they see my door is closed? You check to see, and it is Guilt standing there to reach out and give you a big bear hug.
The feeling of not being there for everyone can gnaw at you. Even though you are working alone in your office, you are hypersensitive to every sound, bump, or ring of the phone that is going on outside of your door. You feel guilty for not being there for everyone and for going back on your open-door policy statement.
What is administrator guilt? An administrator's feeling of missing out on actions and work that is taking place in the building or district and having remorse for focusing on one's self-growth or family, or for not handling situations within the school.
Examples of administrator guilt:
Working on an evaluation and listening to a teacher scolding a student in the hallway
Being a “manager” (of student and adult behaviors) and not an instructional leader
Not attending every single event (concert, exhibit, sports, coffeehouse, etc.)
Taking a sick day
Taking a personal day
Making the conscious choice to leave before your work for the day is done in order to be present for your family
Being too exhausted from work to enjoy your own kiddos
Having to ask staff to help cover for their peers who are absent
Having to go to administration meetings instead of being on campus
Being in data meetings instead of taking the data and going back to the classroom to help fix the data
Not being able to give enough time to each teacher to provide adequate support
Not dealing with a discipline issue in favor of an instructional leadership situation
Missing amazing things going on in classrooms because I get stuck dealing with adults
Not knowing all 582 student names on the spot and the names of their parents
Taking a mental health day and not answering emails
Not being everything to everyone
As a Stand Tall Leader, getting out of the spotlight is important. Similar to a tall person, as a leader you are always “ON.” Even when you don't think you are, guess what? You are! Your staff, students, and community are watching everything you do. When you walk down the hallway, they are wondering where you are going. If you wear a new shirt, they are wondering where you got it and what it means. As a leader, you must be very aware that others are always expecting something from you. Therefore, you need the opportunity and time to get out of the spotlight and not be found. Work needs to get done. You are not wrong, and you should not feel guilty for closing your door.
1.3. Step It Up
When you take time to get out of the spotlight and close your door, the world will not come to an end. True, things may not go exactly the way you want it to, but you can be assured that it won't blow up and crumble to the ground. The goal is to train up those around you to be able to handle issues and concerns. When you are not there for every little thing, the staff builds problem-solving skills. What better way for your staff to become better at solving issues than to have issues to solve? They need to step up. It may take some time to get them to where you want them to be. You may need to go through the process of the levels of Stand Tall Decision Making (see page 92). By having those around you step up their game for decision making, you can be less guilty for shutting your door and taking time do what you need to do so that you are a better leader.
What better way for your staff to become better at solving issues than to have issues to solve?
#standtallstatement
1.4. Timing
When choosing to get out of the spotlight and get work done, it doesn't have to be sporadic. As a building principal, my assistant superintendent visited me to check in every month. One time when she was visiting, I was interrupted about four times in a row. She asked me if the interruptions were a problem. Trying to act like I could handle everything, I responded that it wasn't a problem and it was rare to have four interruptions in a row. Actually, it is usually about six to seven interruptions in a row. She suggested that I put time in my calendar to close the door and have uninterrupted time. I could read an article, reflect on my leadership, or plan the upcoming week. It doesn't matter what you do, you just need to schedule it or it won't happen. Schedule when your door is open and when it isn't. Live by your calendar and be committed to that time. Let your secretary know that time is sacred. Don't let other things get in the way of your time. Having my direct supervisor give me permission to take that time was huge. It allowed me to give guilt a big slap. So, if you need permission to take some personal time, I'm giving it to you now.
I know, I know, I know… at first you will do it for a week or two, and then you may start making excuses for not taking the time. After a month or so, your time is gone, and the pop-ins continue. You are back to what you were doing before. You need to resist the temptation to make excuses. Make sure everyone knows about this time for you to get away and hide. If you need to rotate the time so that you are not alienating the same people every day or week, that is fine. Just schedule the time and stick to it.
If you need permission to take some personal time, I'm giving it to you now.
#standtallstatement
1.5. Practice? It's Just Practice!
When you have time to think things through and practice how you will respond, you come out as a better leader. You are a more polished, prepared, and stronger Stand Tall Leader. It is amazing how on television shows they always say the right thing all the time. Even if they are supposed to say the wrong thing, they say the wrong thing the right way. That is because it is fake, and the actors rehearse what was going to be said and how to say it. Imagine if you as a leader were able to say and do the right thing all the time. You were polished and prepared, especially when things around you were going crazy. That only happens when you properly prepare and rehearse prior to the actual event. When is that practice supposed to take place? Exactly! It usually doesn't.
I used to be so proud of how I could react on a moment's notice within my position. I thought that the outcomes I produced were best when I was pushed, and I operated on instinct. Boy, was I wrong about that. Within my second year as a principal, I had a faculty meeting after school. One of my teachers challenged me with a question about a building management process within the school. I quickly provided an answer and tried to continue with the meeting. Immediately afterward, she asked another question. I responded to that question as well. Then others asked another and another and another question. As a school leader, I am sure you have experienced this. Eventually, I had to stop everyone, stating that I would figure it out and get back with an answer. I wouldn't have minded playing hide and seek at that moment. The next day, I realized that I needed time for myself to think and prepare how I was going to solve the issue and respond appropriately.
Upon reflection and time, I was able to be better prepared and a stronger leader. Take the time you need to get out of the spotlight and reflect on being a leader. It is okay to do this. Others who work with you will be empowered and you will respond much better to those around you. You will be amazed at how refreshed you will feel after having the time to think and practice how to react and respond. Thinking is a valuable commodity that does not happen as often as you would hope. Most of the time as school leaders we are reactionary and on auto pilot. We even get comfortable with operating that way on a regular basis. The sad part is that when we do have time to think, we get FOMO (fear of missing out). When we are behind closed doors alone, thinking and practicing, we think that we are missing out on something that is happening in the school. It's hard to truly shift our thinking toward what we need to be thinking about. Even though we are in our own thoughts, we have an ear out to the noises in the hallway—especially if it is too quiet. It's like when you go on vacation. It takes a day or two to truly wind down and start to fully immerse yourself in the vacation experience. It takes practice for you to get used to having time to think and practice. Work with your office staff and other leaders to carve out time to make it happen. Put it on your calendar. Then keep that schedule. It will help you become a Stand Tall Leader.
When you have time to think things through and practice how you will respond, you come out as a better leader.
#standtallstatement
