The Homeschool Advantage E-Book

Colleen Kessler

• Herausgeber: John Wiley & Sons
• Kategorie: Bildung
• Sprache: Englisch

Seitenzahl: 363

Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2024

Beschreibung

Focus on your child's strengths and passions to support lifelong learning

This book provides parents with practical tools to teach and engage their children at home. By focusing on their children's strengths and passions, rather than on their limitations, parents can foster a love of learning that will last a lifetime. All children have passions, talents, and interests that can be promoted and developed, supporting their achievement and wellbeing. In this book, readers will gain a deeper understanding of how to shift their mindset from focusing on deficits to tapping into a child's strengths. Whether their child has a passion for reading, sports, theater, or anything else, this book will help parents focus on the passions of their homeschooled child.

This versatile book will encourage both new and experienced homeschooling parents, caregivers, and educators. It describes strengths-based and child-focused educational practices and offers clear instructions for using them inside any home, with any age learner. The book features anecdotes from homeschooling parents and children from around the world, and it will help parents spark a love of learning that will last a lifetime!

• Discover how a strengths-based approach to homeschooling can help your kids thrive
• Learn how to foster your children's social, cognitive, and creative development at home
• Get practical tools for enriching childhood and creating a homeschool you'll love
• Build a deeper connection with your children by fostering a shared love of learning

This conversational and informative book is essential reading for homeschool parents. It inspires parents to empower their children to approach life with curiosity, enthusiasm, and confidence.

Leseprobe

Table of Contents

Cover

Table of Contents

Title Page

Copyright

Dedication

Acknowledgments

About the Author

Author's Note

Foreword

Introduction

1 Why Homeschool?

The Gift

Cognitive Advantages

Mental and Physical Health Advantages

Social-Emotional Advantages

Try This!

2 Exploring Strengths

A Strengths-Based Learning Approach

Rooted in Positive Psychology

Cultivating Resilience and Gratitude

Helping Neurodivergent Kiddos

Finding Our Children's Strengths

Try This!

3 Finding Wonder

Following Interests and Rabbit Trails

Transitioning Beyond the Home

The Power of Self-Direction

What If My Child Isn't Interested in Anything?

Try This!

4 A Love of Learning

What About Curriculum?

Crafting a Unique Learning Experience

A Literature-Rich Home

Simplifying to Foster a Climate of Learning

Try This!

5 Play Matters

The Purpose of Play

Child-Directed Play

Emotional Resilience Through Play

Play-Based Learning

Gameschooling

Try This!

6 Six Key Learning Skills

Why Learn About the 6 Cs?

Collaboration

Communication

Content

Critical Thinking

Creativity

Confidence

Try This!

7 Can Creativity Be Taught?

Elements of Creativity

The Power of Questions

Setting the Stage

Try This!

8 Embracing Adventure

Experiences Big and Small

Keeping It Simple and Purposeful

Trusting the Process

Nurturing Resilience and Imagination

Try This!

9 The Family Team

Growing Relationships

Recognizing and Supporting Differences

Being a Family Team

Nurturing Through Shared Experiences

Try This!

10 The Most Important Thing

Connection, Connection, Connection

Active Engagement

Connecting with Older Kids

A Soft Place to Land

Being Their Person

Try This!

11 Start Now

You've Got This!

Know the Laws

Know Your Why

Know Your Kids

The Need to Deschool

Try This!

12 Final Thoughts

Additional Resources

Books

Websites

Index

End User License Agreement

Guide

Cover

Title Page

Copyright

Dedication

Acknowledgments

About the Author

Author's Note

Foreword

Introduction

Table of Contents

Begin Reading

Additional Resources

Index

End User License Agreement

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Praise for The Homeschool Advantage

“As a Type-A box checker, I have struggled to embrace the unique benefits of homeschooling. Colleen Kessler has been the mentor who inspired me to understand that I can best serve my kids by embracing those benefits instead of staying stuck in a public school paradigm. With The Homeschool Advantage, she will inspire you, too.”

—Pam Barnhill,Host of the Homeschool Better Together Podcast

“The Homeschool Advantage is a must-read for any parent considering or currently homeschooling. It stands out not just as a guide, but also as a source of encouragement. Discover and be reminded of the profound impact parents can have when they step into the driver's seat of their children's education. This book is both a memoir and a manifesto from Colleen Kessler for her love of teaching but subsequent disillusionment with the education system. This book is a one-size-fits-all approach to education, and highlights the significant advantages of homeschooling in fostering a child's unique abilities and interests. Empowering, enlightening, entertaining, and so much more!”

—Dennis Dinoia,M.Ed., Mr. D Math

“Colleen Kessler shares from the depth of her experience as a long-term homeschool parent, a mother of differently wired kids, and a recognized authority on gifted studies. In The Homeschool Advantage, she strengthens our resolve and self-trust as homeschooling parents, reminding us that home education is not just one alternative for our kids' learning, but that it may, in fact, be the best option of all!”

—Jamie C. Martin,Veteran Homeschool Parent, Editor of SimpleHomeschool.net and Bestselling Author of Give Your Child the World

“Many people support homeschooling or recommend certain methods of homeschooling, and that's all fine, but Colleen Kessler is a passionate advocate for homeschoolers. She is in the trenches, fighting for the real families and their always-unique kids. She pairs energetic advocacy with a bright mind alive with inspiring ideas and a generous heart to serve. Uncertain, worried, and overwhelmed families are desperate for a champion like Colleen Kessler.”

—S.D. Smith,

Author of The Green Ember Series

“Colleen combines her passion for homeschooling with her real-life experiences to share the value and benefits of homeschooling. Whether you are thinking of homeschooling or need a reminder of why you chose to homeschool in the first place, this book will encourage you and share practical insight into the beauty of homeschooling.”

—Shanda Jacobs,This Devoted Life (thisdevotedlife.com)

“Colleen Kessler delivers such a rock-solid blueprint for why homeschooling better aligns with how our kids learn and what they need to succeed that you'll never even be tempted to place your kids in the system again. This book is a must-read for all homeschooling parents, offering practical steps for immediate action and profound insights that will forever transform your ideas about education. After delving into these pages, you will be profoundly thankful because you will witness firsthand how embracing homeschooling truly grants your children The Homeschool Advantage.”

—Christy-Faith,Author of Homeschool Rising: Shattering Myths, Finding Courage, and Opting Out of the School System

“This book is a support for any homeschooling parent. Through Kessler's experiences and other parents' stories, it reminds us how to build up our kids, set up their environment, and choose the best adventures.”

—Sarah Collins,Occupational Therapist, Owner of HomeschoolOT

“In The Homeschool Advantage, Colleen Kessler masterfully captures the holistic nature of education—academically, emotionally, and socially—while highlighting the significance of following your child's interests and strengths. With her insightful guidance, you'll feel equipped to embrace your child's unique path, making this book an absolute must-have for any homeschooling family.”

—Michelle Brownell,Founder of Homeschool Essentials

“Colleen Kessler combines a passion for homeschooling with real-life experience and research. The Homeschool Advantage is filled with actionable tips you can implement right away, plus mindset shifts that will bring long-term improvement to family life. Colleen encourages us that we really are the best teachers for our kids, and reminds us that we have the freedom to pursue what works best for our own unique families. I especially love her encouragement to prioritize adventure, connection, love, and listening in our homeschool life. If you need fresh inspiration or if you need a reminder that you CAN do this homeschool thing (and do it well), you won't want to miss this book!”

—Amy Sloan,HumilityandDoxology.com

The Homeschool Advantage

A Child-Focused Approach to Raising Lifelong Learners

Colleen Kessler, M.Ed.

Copyright © 2024 Colleen Kessler. All rights reserved.

Photography:Pages 111, 159: Colleen Kessler | Instagram: @colleenkesslerPages 129, 132, 186, 199: Katie Krupa | Instagram: @katiekrupacreativePages 20, 90, 107, Author Headshot: Trevor Kessler | Instagram: @trevorjkesslerAll Other Photos: Heather Tully | Instagram: @heathertullyphotography

Illustrations:Pages 117, 118: Colleen Kessler | Instagram: @colleenkessler

Published by John Wiley & Sons, Inc., Hoboken, New Jersey.Published simultaneously in Canada.

ISBNs: 9781394205738 (Paperback), 9781394205769 (ePDF), 9781394205752 (ePub)

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Library of Congress Control Number

LCCN 2024007588 (print) | LCCN 2024007589 (ebook)

Cover design: Paul McCarthyCover Art: © Getty Images/D3sign

To Brian – you inspire me to love.

To Trevor, Molly, Logan, and Isaac – you inspire me to learn every day.

To all the homeschool families I've met near and far – you inspire me through all you do to encourage your children to find out who they're meant to be.

In Loving Memory

Leonard Anthony Kessler (1941–2019)

To Grandpa Lenny – You were one of our biggest homeschool cheerleaders, and I'm grateful that our kids had the gift of so much time with you simply because they were home during the school day and could spend it learning and loving alongside you. You are loved and missed.

Acknowledgments

The future looks bright because of all you parents taking on the education of your own. You're raising the leaders, innovators, creators, and parents of tomorrow. Thank you for making the world a better place. Together, we can raise a strong generation that is resilient, kind, and ready to nurture and love one another and continue to learn for the love of it.

To all the people I have had the opportunity to learn from, coach, speak for, and get to know from around the world, I want to say thank you for being the inspiration and foundation for this book. It wouldn't exist without you.

Having an idea and turning it into a book is as challenging as it sounds. The experience is both difficult and rewarding. I especially want to thank the people who helped make this happen. Thank you to the team at Wiley and Jossey Bass for the opportunity to tackle this important project and bring it into the world so beautifully. The back and forth of hammering out ideas, details, and focus can be difficult, and I'm grateful I had the chance to have the guidance of Sam Ofman, Navin Vijayakumar, and Tracy Brown Hamilton, whose encouragement, support, and commitment to producing the best book possible was so appreciated. Thank you, also, to the design team and production staff for your tireless work in bringing a book to life that I'm excited to share with the world.

My poor, underfed, ignored children were subjected to the words, “You're on your own for dinner tonight. Pretend I'm not home. I need to work on my book,” so many times Isaac told me he “can't wait until it's done. I miss you.” Thank you for eating endless meals of instant oatmeal, frozen mac and cheese, ramen, and sandwiches. I promise I'll cook for you again soon.

I couldn't possibly do any of the work I do without the best, smartest, strongest, and most supportive husband ever. This book was written during some of our busiest months ever. You think that parenting toddlers is crazy, but the teen years are an exercise in triangulating schedules, mapping out routes, and waiting in parking lots for endlessly long hours while they have fun, but don't want you around. Throughout it all, Brian, you were a rock – exactly the foundation I and the kids needed to hold on and be strong ourselves. I've never loved you more than I do right now. Thank you for always believing in me.

I have so many amazing friends, colleagues, and cheerleaders that I can't possibly mention them all, but there are a handful who have shared stories of their homeschooling and have given me so much support through this process and put up with hearing about the book again and again and again. Thank you to Cheryl Pitt and Aurie Good – I honestly don't know what I'd do without you two in my life. Thank goodness for Voxer! Cindy West, you are one of the best humans I know. Thank you for always being there for me. You make my life richer. Shawna Wingert, thank you for encouraging me at the start of all of this. You're a huge reason this book is in the world today. And thank you to all of the people who have helped bring kids to rehearsals and practices and dinners and parties while I was locked up in my office, chained to my desk. Thanks to the directors and teachers at The Aurora School of Music and The Fine Arts Association who opened up empty classrooms and spaces so I could work while my kids rehearsed. And to our homeschooling friends near and far … I love you all so very much.

About the Author

Colleen Kessler believes that you are the absolute best parent and teacher there is for your own children, no matter how their brains are wired.

The author of more than a dozen books for parents, teachers, and children; award-winning educator, educational coach, and consultant; international speaker; and passionate advocate for the needs of differently wired kids, Colleen has a B.S. in Elementary Education, an M.Ed. in Gifted Studies, and is the founder of the popular podcast and website Raising Lifelong Learners as well as The Learner's Lab – a community for homeschooling parents and their bright, quirky, outside-the-box kiddos.

Recent titles include Raising Resilient Sons: A Boy Mom's Guide to Building a Strong, Confident, and Emotionally Intelligent Family; 100 Backyard Activities That Are the Coolest, Dirtiest, Creepy-Crawliest Ever!; Raising Creative Kids: A Collection of Creativity Prompts for Children; and The Anxiety Toolkit: 96 Ways to Help Your Child Calm Their Worries.

Colleen lives in northeast Ohio with her reading specialist husband, four delightfully differently wired kiddos, her lazy Pug, chaotic Border Collie, a dozen and a half chickens, two red-eared sliders, a bearded dragon, and an ever-changing assortment of small animals and insects. You can find her online at RaisingLifelongLearners.com.

Author's Note

Many clients, children, adults, friends, and listeners have shared their stories, experiences, and thoughts with me at conferences via voicemail, in calls, and online. I am so grateful for their generosity, bravery, and compassion. These are the heroes of the homeschooling culture – moms, dads, and kids in the trenches, learning and loving together. All names have been changed to preserve privacy.

You'll find quotes from homeschooling kids throughout the book in pull-out sections identified as “The Best Thing …” These were so fun to collect from friends, clients, and listeners! I asked parents to either ask their kids the question, “What is the BEST thing about homeschooling?” or “What do you like about homeschooling?” and their answers are just what you need to keep yourself motivated through the adventure of learning alongside your kiddos at home, so make sure you take time to read those!

I've also included stories of my own parenting, homeschooling, and family life. My four children and the stories they've agreed to allow me to share – they're their stories, after all – are sprinkled throughout the book. I remember being at a speaking event once with two of my kids, when one told me it was a little weird that some of the people she met talked to her as if they knew her well, and shared a story or anecdote they'd heard about that kiddo's life. I told her that her stories were hers, and she had a few choices if she felt weird about those attendees connecting with her like they knew her.

Since she and her siblings already have a say about which stories I tell when I speak to an audience or write a book, this was about her traveling with me. I told her she could a) choose not to travel to events with me anymore while I continued to tell her stories, b) continue to travel with me and I’d stop telling anecdotes about her when I spoke, or c) we’d keep things as they were and she’d work to regulate her reactions and emotions when someone came up to speak to her. She thought about it for a few days, then told me I needed to continue sharing so those parents who felt the need to connect with her over a story that touched them could know they weren't alone in their parenting and homeschooling, and that she wanted to continue to be a part of those moments.

Because my kids have seen the power of sharing and connecting with others, they agree to let me share their names and stories when I write and speak, so you'll hear a lot about them within the pages of this book, and I'll use their real names. I have four kiddos. At the time of this book's publication, Trevor is twenty-one and a homeschool graduate who began homeschooling in the middle of his first grade year, and is now working in the field of audio and video editing and production. He edits several podcasts (including mine) and shoots videos for online course creators, various freelance clients in multiple industries, and has an ongoing media contract with a racecar company.

Molly is currently seventeen, a high school senior who has homeschooled since the beginning, and plans on pursuing a BFA in musical theater once she graduates.

My daughter Logan is a fifteen-year-old high school freshman who loves animals and hopes to either become a zookeeper or an animal trainer.

And my youngest is eleven-year-old Isaac, who, at the time of this book's publication, doesn't know what he wants to do with his life as he is “just too young to make lifelong decisions because there's so much cool stuff to explore, Mom.” So, if you see references to Trevor, Molly, Logan, or Isaac, they're not only my children, but four of the coolest, most interesting people I know.

For more homeschooling support, visit http://www.homeschooladvantage.info/ – created especially as a companion to this book or https://RaisingLifelongLearners.com. You'll find articles, printables, links, resources, booklists, and ideas to enrich your homeschool, along with a contact page with a link to my email and voicemail so you can reach out if you ever need support. You are not alone in the homeschooling journey. Remember that.

Foreword

Homeschooling is funny business. We're all motivated to start homeschooling by different personal reasons, of course, but regardless of how you got here – to this moment in which you're reading a book about homeschooling – I can bet that at some point along the way you've had this thought: Maybe my child will be better served if we educate at home?

And then exactly 1.3 seconds later, you found yourself plagued by doubt. Am I cut out for homeschooling? What if I can't give my child what they need? What if I'm bad at it? What if they hate it? What if they don't learn? What if I can't teach them? Have I completely lost my mind?

In all the years of homeschooling my own six kids and in talking with thousands of homeschooling families all over the world, I have become convinced of this: there are as many successful ways to homeschool as there are homeschooled kids.

Successful homeschoolers use all different teaching methods – classical, nature-based, literature-based, STEM, unit studies, online, unschooling, or some combination of any of those or a million others. They follow very rigid schedules, no schedule at all, or something in between. They outsource everything, outsource nothing, or outsource a little. They homeschool with fancy science equipment, road school across the country, run homesteads, or (like me) none of the above. My own homeschool looks pretty ordinary, aside from our embarrassingly extensive library use.

Regardless of the myriad ways in which they do it, homeschooling families all over the world are raising confident, capable, well-educated kids. And yet there is one thing that all homeschooling parents need, regardless of how they do it. Every homeschooling parent needs someone in their corner.

I have known the author of this book for a long time, and here is what I know: Colleen is in your corner. She's in mine, too.

By the end of this book, she'll give you the strong conviction that you are never alone, the confidence that you are the best teacher for your unique kids, and a wellspring of actionable ideas that will improve your homeschool today.

In the pages of this book, you'll gain an awareness of your kids' strengths, a respect for the way they learn, and a plan for bringing those elements together so that your kids grow into the kind, capable, compassionate, and creative people you know them to be.

This is a book for parents who want to be their children's champion of home education. And that's just another way to say: this book is for you.

—Sarah Mackenzie

Author of Teaching from Rest and The Read-Aloud Family

Introduction

When children are surrounded by curious and creative adults, they have their own inner genius sparked into action.

—Thomas Armstrong

Just because a lot of people are saying the same thing loudly over and over, doesn't mean it's true.

—From The Very Persistent Gappers of Frip by George Saunders

“He is an extreme thinker.”

My son's pre-kindergarten teacher had invited me into the classroom that day to observe him in the classroom setting, and so we could talk about what the best options would be as he left the flexible learning environment he was in for the more structured one he'd find at the local public school he'd attend in kindergarten. She asked me to sit in the back of the room and simply observe their read-aloud session and told me we'd talk afterward, once she'd led the kids down the hall to their music class.

So I did.

I sat at a tiny chair in the back of the small classroom and watched as she called the twelve kiddos over to the carpet to sit in a semicircle around her chair. She pulled out a sweet picture book that featured a little boy getting into all sorts of mischief during the day as he avoided what he was supposed to be doing in the first place, only to realize what he'd done, then backtrack to fix it all and complete the tasks before his mother returned home. Eleven of the kids in the class sat with rapt attention as the perky preschool teacher's voice filled the room.

Unlike the rest of his classmates, my son rolled around the side of the classroom. He crawled back and forth and back and forth. He sprawled on the table, then under the table. Just as he upended himself into a headstand against the wall, head cushioned by a pillow, and I was about to rise and intervene through my haze of first-time–mom mortification, the teacher caught my eye and shook her head gently. I sat through the rest of the story, while eleven little faces stared intently at the book in their teacher's hands and one closed his eyes while standing inverted against the side wall of the classroom, and felt like a complete failure.

Sure, he was my first child, and we all fail a bit with the firstborn, right? But I was also a teacher of almost fifteen years with a master's degree, an educational speaker and trainer, an author, and had nannied all through college. I wasn't inexperienced. And I knew this kid. He loved learning, and was always trying new things, seeking out people to learn from, hanging around the adults at parties so he could pump them about their jobs, interests, hobbies, and the books they were reading.

He should have been loving this read aloud.

And then the teacher started asking questions about the story to gauge comprehension and help the kiddos learn to talk about books. She asked the simple questions you'd expect in a classroom of five-year-olds: What color shirt was he wearing? Who was the story about? What happened at the end of the story? Where did it take place? Then she asked what the kids would have done if they'd been in the boy's place, and my son flipped out of his inversion and crept closer to the carpet. A few of the kiddos answered, saying they'd have done what the boy did, or hidden from the old man, or kept the pie all to themself.

My son raised his hand, “Mrs. Mowry, that boy had a lot of adventures, but if I were him, I would have just done what my mom asked me to do in the first place. He ended up having to fix a lot of messes and mistakes, and then still did what he was supposed to in the end. If he had just done it right away, he would have been able to play after and wouldn't have had so much extra work to deal with.” When she asked if he always did what he was told right away he answered, with a sheepish grin in my direction, that, no, he didn't, and it did get him into trouble sometimes, but he usually wished he just done it right the first time and the boy should too.

His teacher sent a little smile in my direction, bustled the kids into line, and led them to the music teacher's room down the hall before coming back to talk to me. When she came back, she said those words to me and went on to tell me she was worried for his future in school. He was slated to attend our local public school the next year, and would be in a classroom of thirty or more students with teachers who were doing their best to meet the needs of all the kids in the rooms, but who just couldn't logistically be all to every one of the children in their classes.

Mrs. Mowry was an exemplary teacher. She took the time to get to know each of those little people in her tiny classroom – their strengths, weaknesses, interests, even the things they loathed – and met them where they were, encouraging them to learn and discover new things every day. For kids like my son, she incorporated movement, novelty, opportunities for higher-level thinking, and engaged him in interesting conversations as often as she could.

It was the best kind of educational experience – individualized to each of the kiddos in that room. At that moment in time, my son loved learning.

That love of learning began fading once he moved onto the local school for kindergarten. That transition marked the beginning of meetings, observations, parent-teacher conferences, failures, and disappointments. The first time we were called to come in and talk to the teacher was about him shredding his nap mat during the state-mandated rest time. His teacher, a kind and loving woman, was at wit's end because she was required by district policy to keep the kids on their nap mats for forty-five minutes each day and my son would roll, talk, disrupt, and shred the whole time.

After many conversations and conferences with guidance counselors and the principal, we finally reached a compromise. My son, who had given up naps for good at around six months of age, could have a small box of logic puzzles, games, and books at his rest spot, and he'd work on those silently on his mat for the required time, then he and his teacher would have a five-minute conversation about all the thoughts that had swirled in his head while he rested and couldn't talk about them.

But that wasn't the end of it.

We got to know the staff at the elementary school very well as we were repeatedly called in to discuss my son's behaviors. And they weren't the typical calls one expects when dealing with a rambunctious, impulsive boy forced to sit still for large chunks of his day. I'll never forget the day we were called into the guidance counselor's office because my son had allegedly threatened another boy on the playground and was being sent home and suspended the next day.

I saw his wide eyes staring out from across the hall where he sat with an aide while I was ushered into the office to talk with the guidance counselor, teacher, and principal. It seems that a playground volunteer had overheard him shout “I'm going to stab you with my knife,” to his best friend, while they were playing a game of Hunt, one they'd invented while running the neighborhood, and played nearly every day after school. His friend laughed it off and shouted back that he'd never be caught, but the damage was done. While his buddy looked on in mild horror and tried to explain that it wasn't a big deal, the aide tugged my son inside to have the threat dealt with. And as the principal and guidance counselor calmly explained, the school had a zero-tolerance policy with regards to threatening language, so my six-year-old must be suspended.

While I agreed completely that my kiddo needed to understand that words have power, there were places and situations where certain words and games were inappropriate, and it was important to know how to behave in a school setting, I also didn't believe that zero-tolerance equaled zero-common-sense. When his principal suggested that the suspension was the only logical consequence, and that he'd have to also miss the Dad's Day event that was happening later that week despite my husband having already requested the day off, I protested.

That extreme thinker could learn a powerful lesson, but I was worried that this particular sentence would teach the wrong one, as the punishment didn't quite fit the crime. I suggested lost or heavily supervised recess time, even volunteering to come in myself and facilitate the most boring, miserable period so he'd want to behave and regain the joy of free play at recess, while making sure to guard his words going forward.

But the staff was immovable. Suspension was the only option, and the consequence would increase with any more infractions.

I told them I still felt they were missing out on an opportunity to teach him something about the power of words, as well as how to get along with others, but reassured that when I left the room, I'd support their decision within his hearing. I was worried, though, as I thought the wrong lesson may have been taught. My son was an outside-the-box thinker and processed the world in unique ways.

My worry was founded a few weeks later.

The school was preparing for standardized testing and my son showed open hostility about the idea of sitting still, filling in bubbles, and wasting – in his words – a whole day of learning fun. He loved his kindergarten teacher and the double room she shared with another teacher. They had set up a collaborative system where the kids moved freely between rooms, working in small groups, centers, and on projects throughout the day. It was the perfect setup for a kinesthetic mover like my guy was. And, now that the rest time problem had been solved, he loved being in the classroom.

However, he was dreading testing week.

The day before testing was to start, I received another call from the school, asking that I come in as soon as possible to meet with the principal. I dropped the baby and preschooler off at a neighbor's and rushed into the school. What was it now? The secretary was cryptic, though she assured me nobody was hurt.

I'll never forget seeing the principal's face as I sat across from her that day. She sat, waiting, and tapping her feet, at the table in the conference room. I remember her taking a deep breath and squaring her shoulders before speaking. She apologized for not thinking past a policy and remembering to take young kids' differences into account when we last met. It seems that, before she went into administration, she had worked with gifted elementary students and had forgotten to remember how quirky and innovative their thinking could be. And while my son was not yet identified as gifted, he was certainly like the kids she had once taught.

She told me that my son had set up things so that he and his best friend were talking next to the kid in the class who enjoyed a reputation as the class snitch during a break when an aide was facilitating the group. He told his buddy that he wanted to kill him. His friend told him to stop saying stupid things like that or he'd just get into trouble again and walked away. The other kiddo, though, went right to that aide and told her what he'd said. She brought him to the principal's office and sat with him while they discussed calling me. The principal told my son that he'd earned another day's suspension, and she was disappointed that he hadn't learned how important words were when talking to other kids at school.

The principal, after taking that deep breath, told me that my son had leaned over her desk, looked her straight in the eyes, and calmly said, “Mrs. J., don't you think a threat of that magnitude deserves an entire week's suspension?” It seems that he'd staged the whole thing so he could get out of testing the next week.

Yes, my son was an extreme thinker, and despite us trying to fit that big, active, and often calculating mind into the system my husband and I had both made careers supporting, it just wasn't working out. Not only were behaviors escalating as he found the challenge of getting out of work much more interesting to figure out than the work itself, but his love of learning was crumbling before our eyes.

I'd love to tell you that the call to the principal's office over the testing week episode was the catalyst that sent us diving headfirst into homeschooling, but we weren't there yet. Homeschooling wasn't something I'd ever really considered back then. In fact, it took us until February of his first-grade year, and many, many phone calls, behavior challenges, and tests before we'd make the decision that changed our lives, and gave our children the advantage of a life filled with adventure, rabbit trails, nontraditional daily schedules, and an eclectic, interest-led, strengths-based approach that validated all I'd learned about best practice education in my graduate school classes, research, and time working with kids and their parents in and out of schools.

You picked up this book because you know homeschooling works and want to follow a different approach. You're not looking to re-create school-at-home. The school model isn't working for you – whether your kiddo has already been enrolled in school for a time or has never stepped foot inside a school building. You're ready for a child-focused approach that will instill a lifelong love of learning in your kids and bring your family closer together. This is the book for you.

Have you ever been frustrated when you have taken the time to read a book about a topic you know you love and want to learn more about doing, only to find that most of its content is spent convincing the reader why they should love the topic and want to do it? Then, only the last third or so has any suggestions for applying strategies to your life?

I've read many, many homeschooling books over the years that spell out very compelling reasons for taking on the enormous responsibility of teaching your own children at home. I share some of my favorites in the “Additional Resources” section of this book and on https://HomeschoolAdvantage.Resources – created especially as a companion to this book and on my website https://RaisingLifelongLearners.com. You'll find articles, printables, links, resources, booklists, and ideas to enrich your homeschool, along with a contact page with a link to my email and voicemail so you can reach out if you ever need support. When I began speaking at homeschooling conventions and conferences, I made a commitment to myself and anyone who would take their time to come to one of my sessions that the majority of my talks would be actionable suggestions they could use to improve their homeschool immediately, highlighted through storytelling and anecdotes to reassure them that they're not alone in anything they experience in the day to day of homeschooling.

I make that same promise to you as you read this book.

Whether you homeschool already or are curious about homeschooling or other alternative styles of learning, know that you are the best teacher for your kids. You can trust yourself and your children while embracing the adventure a lifestyle of learning for its own sake is, and the wonder it brings.

The wonderful thing about homeschooling is that parents aren't tied to one way of doing things. You're free to make it personal and tailor it to your family's needs and preferences. You can change it up week by week, month by month, or year by year. Because it means so much, homeschooling parents, you often doubt, feel like you're not doing enough or worry you're failing your kids in some way. This very worry, though, is what ensures you're giving your kids exactly what they need. Because you worry; you won't fail.

I want you to know that there IS a way to meet your kids right where they are, and build them up to be confident, resilient, and mentally healthy kids who are following their dreams and passions along the way to becoming the incredible adults they're meant to be. Too many of you scroll through your social media feeds on a rough day – and we all have them – and compare yourselves to the highlight reels others show.

You're left wallowing in doubt, worried that your kids won't ever be like “the kids of the parents you see online.” But those families online have bad days, too. Every time I post about a rough day, a temper tantrum thrown, an abandoned unit study, or putting on a movie marathon and calling it school, I get hundreds of likes, comments, and DMs communicating some variation of, “I needed this today.”

All those years ago, when we brought Trevor home from school, we figured we'd take it kid by kid and year by year, maybe putting one or more back into the school system one day. But we didn't. Trevor may have been the reason we started homeschooling, but we've kept on going for more than fifteen years so far because it works. And it's an incredible gift to be home with these really interesting little people, watching them grow into the amazing humans they're meant to be. When we started homeschooling, Trevor was in first grade, our daughter Molly was three, and my daughter Logan was a baby. Isaac wasn't even born yet. Here we are, years later, with a graduate, two high schoolers, and one on the verge of middle school. The younger three kids have never gone to school and will graduate from our homeschool like their big brother. You'll read more about them in the coming chapters.

They are thriving.

Your kiddos can, too.

Remember, you're meeting your kids' needs every day in teeny, tiny ways and big, huge ways, so be encouraged. Know you can not only make it homeschooling your kids through high school, but you, too, can thrive while doing it. You can enjoy the process of learning alongside your kids, the rabbit trails you follow because you didn't know every answer to every question, and the adventure of discovering wonder through the eyes of your little ones and