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- Herausgeber: John Wiley & Sons
- Kategorie: Bildung
- Sprache: Englisch
Do you find yourself wanting more out of life? It's time to bring play to your every day Play is not just for kids! There are many reasons we need play in our lives. The Playful Life shows you why and how to bring more playfulness to all aspects of your life. You'll explore how to create meaningful, relevant, and fun experiences for yourself and others through both a playful mindset and playful behaviors. Through research and 20+ years of teaching children and adults, authors Dr. Julie Jones and Jed Dearybury have found that play is not only fun, it's essential to a full life. In this book, they share their knowledge and inspire you to reflect on the need for connection and joy for healthy living through play. This book will equip you with new definitions, ideas, and ways of thinking about play for your daily life. With a relaxed tone, comical banter, and real talk, the authors encourage new understandings about what play is and empower you to make more playful choices. If you strive to find balance, overcome stress, and enjoy each day through play--The Playful Life is a must read for your life journey! * Learn what play means and why it's so essential to our everyday lives--at every age * Discover the incredible benefits of play to your physical and mental health * Get ideas for incorporating play into your everyday life at work, at home, or when you're out and about * Begin healing past traumas and grow into the person you are meant to be--through play and playful living! Building on the popular book The Playful Classroom, this is a new and exciting take on what play does for all of us-- physically, socially, emotionally, and cognitively.
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Seitenzahl: 446
Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2022
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Table of Contents
COVER
PRAISE FOR
THE PLAYFUL LIFE
TITLE PAGE
COPYRIGHT
HEY Y'ALL
FOREWORD
ABOUT THE AUTHORS
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
SECTION 1: Meaning
CHAPTER 1: Wanna Play?
CHAPTER 2: Defining Play
CHAPTER 3: Play as a Behavior
CHAPTER 4: Play as a Mindset
Sociability
Wonder
Imagination
Spontaneity
Humor
CHAPTER 5: Cultivating a Playful Mindset
Play & Ponder
SECTION 2: Memory
CHAPTER 6: Things We Learned from Playing
CHAPTER 7: Cognitive Benefits of Play
Play Improves Attention and Cognitive Function
Play Enhances Creativity
CHAPTER 8: Social Emotional Benefits of Play
Play Develops Empathy
Play Enhances Our Social Skills.
Play Teaches Cooperation with Others
CHAPTER 9: Physical Benefits of Play
Play Keeps Us Healthy, Young, and Happy
Play Relieves Stress and Helps Us Cope
CHAPTER 10: Play Personalities
The Joker
The Kinesthete
The Explorer
The Competitor
The Director
The Collector
The Storyteller
Play Personality Type Quiz
You Have Results, Now What?
Play & Ponder
SECTION 3: Mind
CHAPTER 11: Biological Predilection
CHAPTER 12: This Is Your Brain. This Is Your Brain on Play
How to Create Experiences with the Integrated Paradigm
CHAPTER 13: The Default Mode Network and Flow
Default Mode Network
DMN and Flow
CHAPTER 14: Playful Habits
How Habits Are Formed
Creating Playful Habits
CHAPTER 15: Play as Healing
Play for Emotional Healing
Play for Physical Healing
Play for Mindfulness
Mindful Play
Play & Ponder
SECTION 4: Mistakes
CHAPTER 16: Low‐Risk/High‐Risk Play
CHAPTER 17: The Learning and Growth Process (RISK)
CHAPTER 18: Mistakes and Fear
CHAPTER 19: Excuses Are Mistakes
Why Do We Make Excuses?
CHAPTER 20: A Path to EliminatingExcuses
Let's Eliminate One Excuse Together
Now What?
Play & Ponder
SECTION 5: Movement
CHAPTER 21: When Play Is Missing
CHAPTER 22: Start with Yourself
CHAPTER 23: Grow and Play with Friends
CHAPTER 24: Play in Our Communities
CHAPTER 25: You Don't Have to Run a Marathon
Play for Community Healing
CHAPTER 26: Advocating Through Play
Playfulness Leading to Advocacy Is Nothing New
Start with a Dot
Play & Ponder
SECTION 6: Mojo
CHAPTER 27: Ned Barrett
CHAPTER 28: Tashma Glymph
CHAPTER 29: Sonia Aleman
CHAPTER 30: Joan Wheatley
CHAPTER 31: Marjorie Boafo Appiah
CHAPTER 32: Tina Arenas
CHAPTER 33: Matt Leung
CHAPTER 34: Balance
Signs Life Might Be Out of Balance
Bringing More Balance in Your Playful Life
Play & Ponder
SECTION 7: Map
CHAPTER 35: Play Alone
1. Map‐a‐Doodle Your Schedule or To‐Do List
2. Take a Walk “Art”side
3. Read a Book
4. Organize the Junk Drawer
5. Tell Your Plants a Story about Your Life
6. Put Googly Eyes on Your Lampshade
7. Paint a Rock
8. Watch Videos Online That Make You Laugh
9. Find a Class (So Many Are Free) and Join In!
10. Drive Down a Road You've Never Been
11. Beat Your High Score on Your Favorite Video Game
12. Complete a Whole Crossword Puzzle
13. List All the Rhyming Words That Make You Giggle
14. Make a List of All of Your Favorite Things
15. Turn Up the Tunes While You Wash Your Car, Your Dog, or the Front Stoop
CHAPTER 36: Play with Friendsor Family
1.
Cow Poker
or
My Next House
2. Game Night
3. Progressive Dinner
4. Art Challenges
5. Play Calendar
6. Butcher Paper Dinner Chat
7. Make Up Adventurous Stories about Everyday Events
8. Wish List/Challenge Board
9. Book Club and More
10. Design a Scavenger Hunt
11. Host an Art Party
12. Connect with Nature
13. Minute to Win It
14. Movie Night
15. Role Play Dinner
CHAPTER 37: Play with Strangers
1. Join in on Neighborhood Events
2. Visit Your Local Watering Hole, and Ask Strangers to Doodle in Your Journal
3. Pillow Fight
4. Flash Mobs
5. Curiosity Conversations
6. Rock, Paper, Scissor Challenge
7. Finish the Lyrics
8. The Conference on the Value of Play
9. Community Classes
10. Reading Clubs at a Local Bookstore
11. League Sports for Adults
12. Organize a Rainbow Ball
13. Poetry Slam
14. Karaoke
15. Barista Bop
CHAPTER 38: Play as a Community
1. World Play Day
2. Music on Main/Jazz on the Square
3. Duck Derby
4. Yarn Bomb
5. Collaborative Murals
6. Mice Hunt
7. Online Games (
Wordle
,
Farmville
,
Candy Crush
)
8. Community Chess
9. Connect the Dots
10. Playful Sidewalks
11. Photo Challenge
12. Start a Community Garden
13. Organize a Movie Night for Your Community
14. Pop‐Up Yoga
15. Cooter Fest!
Play & Ponder
Southernisms and Their Meanings
Section One
Section Two
Section Three
Section Four
Section Five
Section Six
Section Seven
REFERENCES
INDEX
END USER LICENSE AGREEMENT
Guide
COVER PAGE
PRAISE FOR THE PLAYFUL LIFE
TITLE PAGE
COPYRIGHT
HEY Y'ALL
FOREWORD
ABOUT THE AUTHORS
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
Table of Contents
Begin Reading
Southernisms and Their Meanings
REFERENCES
INDEX
WILEY END USER LICENSE AGREEMENT
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PRAISE FOR THE PLAYFUL LIFE
This book feels like you're having a conversation with two friends while simultaneously learning an immense amount in the process Jed and Julie's playful candor helps you take in all that you're reading and digest it. And boy, did we eat it up. Highly recommend this book to anyone looking to educate themselves on the importance of play, the importance of self, and the importance of the curious world around them.
—PJ and Thomas McKay, bloggers and influencers, The Property Lovers
As an educator and public speaker across the nation, it's my job to engage people with laughter and learning. At the heart of that work is the power of play. After reading Jed and Julie's book, I now understand all the more just how important playfulness is to life. Read this ASAP. You won't regret it!
—Gerry Brooks, lifetime educator and national public speaker
The Playful Life is a gem, with so many practical and easily implemented ideas to make every day more joyful and fun! Julie P. Jones and Jed Dearbury have struck the perfect balance of providing inspiring and meaningful anecdotes alongside tons of actionable things we can do immediately to make life more playful. The book is timely, practical, and a must‐read!
—Adam Bellow, CEO and cofounder, Breakout EDU
In their first book, The Playful Classroom, Jed and Julie demonstrated how play could lead to deeper thinking, improved creativity, and better social‐emotional skills. In their second book, The Playful Life, they build on that foundation by sharing how play can be an end rather than a means to an end. While the style is playful and approachable, the book is a deep reading, proving that play is actually a very serious topic. The book offers a more expansive view of play, including both as a behavior and as a mindset. Play is collecting things. Play is building and making. Play is imagination. Play is creative risk‐taking. The authors provide practical ideas and strategies you can implement tomorrow.
—John Spencer, professor and author
Play is more important and more necessary than ever, and Julie and Jed are experts on the subject. They are expert guides to help us all cultivate a more playful approach to life. Stop what you're doing and READ THIS BOOK. I guarantee your future, more playful self will be grateful you did.
—Jarrett Lerner, author and illustrator
We have evolved to play. It is in our DNA. It has been part of our human story since the beginning of time. Without it, our lives long for fullness. As someone who walked away from two decades of a playless life to fully embrace my playful spirit, I strongly encourage you to read this book and join me in living a playful life.
—Darryl Edwards, founder and CEO, Primal Play
This book expertly and joyfully allows the reader to engage and learn the benefit of having a “playful brain and mindset” to face our challenges and overcome obstacles. Being better at play may be the antidote that lifts folks out of an exhausted existence and into the space of fun, humor, laughter, and showing life who is living it.
—Dr. Janet Taylor, psychiatrist and author, The Courageous Classroom
What a fun read (which I suppose is to be expected from a book about the art of play, but one never knows)! No matter who you are, this humorous and informative book will remind you of the importance of play and of the wide‐eyed, childlike enthusiasm for life we adults tend to forget. This is the first book I've read that told me to stop reading and go do a spontaneous activity that brings me joy, which inspired me to go do said spontaneous thing, but then immediately return to the book to see what other wonderful advice it held.
—Michael Judson Berry, actor and writer
Play connects us. Play heals. Play helps us learn. But in modern life, play is a forgotten art, a casualty of our test‐ and work‐obsessed culture that isolates us from what makes us human. The Playful Life is an ode to play, written as a heartfelt romp that models playfulness itself. Julie and Jed teach us that play isn't simply what we do; it's a mindset we hone, a skill that we sharpen, a habit that we build, and so much more. And whether we're looking to engage with life or avoid burnout, it all begins with the relationship we explore with our own inner child.
—Takeru “TK” Nagayoshi, 2020 Massachusetts Teacher of the Year
Julie and Jed's new book, The Playful Life, inspires the reader to go beyond the bounds of societal expectations and engage the world joyfully, expressively, and eagerly, returning to us the eyes of a child. With rejuvenated vision, we can see our experiences and communities with a sense of wonder and curiosity about the possibilities, allowing us not just to think, but dream big … AGAIN!
—Natalia Rosario, urban planner
Hopelessness is chronic and stress is a silent killer. Due to such painful realities in life, intentionality in healthy mental hygiene has become more imperative now than ever before. In The Playful Life, Julie Jones and Jed Dearybury serve us up heaping and happy doses of cheerful perspectives, brimming with life‐applicable lessons and amusing dashes of hilarity. I felt my world destressing with each and every word and I became more playful with every jot and tittle!
—Marvin Rogers, author and wine industry executive
Playfulness doesn't make hard things, big feelings, or problems go away, but it can help us grow through them and connect more fully with others around us. This book outlines the tangible, accessible ways to become more playful in life along with the many benefits supported by research. Bonus: it's playfully written! Kudos to the authors and all those on the mission to live playfully.
—Alison Hughey, MT‐BC, music therapist
The Playful Life
THE POWER OF PLAY IN OUR EVERY DAY
Julie P. Jones, PhD
Jed Dearybury
Copyright © 2023 Jossey‐Bass Publishing. All rights reserved.
Published by John Wiley & Sons, Inc., Hoboken, New Jersey.
Published simultaneously in Canada.
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HEY Y'ALL
How y'all doing?
It's been a tough few years since our last book, right? Who knew when The Playful Classroom was sent to press that it would be released during the global shutdown that came as a result of COVID‐19? While it wasn't the best‐timed release for a book about playful teaching because schools were in survival mode at the time, it certainly reminded us both about the need for play in our everyday lives more than ever before.
Now, over two years removed from that initial shuttering of so much of the world, we are starting to emerge on the other side only to find rumors of another variant, reports of war, and the continued widening of political divides around the globe.
Almost daily since the release of our first work about the power of play, someone has said to us, “We love learning about play in the classroom, but we really need a book about how to bring more playfulness into our everyday lives.” At the heart of each request was someone seeking permission to play. They were weighed down by the worry, grief, and fear of the past two years, coupled with the reality that life was moving on whether we were ready or not. The enormity of the anxiety we all faced—albeit different for everyone, depending on a variety of social, economic, and community factors—is overwhelming to think about. Sadly, not enough people are talking about how to help us recover from the emotional toll the pandemic has had on our lives.
Enter us, Julie and Jed, Jed and Julie—two educators who love our students, love our profession, love our community, and love people—who desire to make the world better with everything we do. Our world is different now from when The Playful Classroom was launched … the world pre‐2020. Eyes have been opened to an interconnectedness in such a way that we can never go back to “the way it used to be.” At the same time the pandemic was taking over, the murder of George Floyd by police officers forced the world to face a deeply oppressive system that disproportionately hurts Black people. Seeing the hurt the world was facing on multiple fronts, coupled with the desire coming from our readers of our previous work, The Playful Life was born.
We believe play, as both a behavior and a mindset, is a key to change. The empathy it builds, the friends it makes, the wounds it heals, the memories it makes, the walls it destroys. We need more play, and we needed it yesterday. Y'all hear us?
Admittedly, we don't always get it right. We are both white people: one of us a member of the queer community, the other an LGBTQ+ ally who is heterosexual. We were raised in the Deep South, in small towns that often jaded our worldview by the whiteness that surrounded us. Our entire adult lives have been spent moving away from a single, and often warped, view of the world to embracing all the beauty that is humanity around the globe. We recognize that play looks different for everyone based on religious, cultural, and community values. At the heart of this work are shared benefits we all need as we move through time to the next generation of people.
As you read, consider the words of our grannies as they sent us out into the backyard: “Play purdy,” they'd say. At the heart of those words was their desire for us to get along, be nice, work together, treat others with respect, value others as ourselves, love one another, talk through our differences, and to join together in play because it is good for our lives.
Play purdy, y'all.
FOREWORD
It is there in each of us. Our own play nature. And it has been refined over millions of years as an integral part of each of us. If sufficiently triggered by life opportunities, that nature shapes how we experience ourselves, shapes how we see the world, and can color how we see and experience others. This may seem surprising, as play is not generally viewed as a necessary inclusion for an overall balanced and fulfilling life. However, as you read The Playful Life, you will see elements of yourself you may not have recognized, but which add authenticity, fulfillment, sustained motivation … and more fun to your daily and hourly traverse wherever you live, and whatever your life setting or circumstances.
Is yours a life with too little play? Or have you, like most responsible citizens, relegated play as something you engage in when all other “responsibilities” are completed?
You are about to embark on a book, grounded in the life experiences of the authors and reflecting good science, that will comprehensively allow you, if you heed its directions, to prompt you, with solid guidance, to see and experience yourself as, among your other attributes—yes, you are—a PLAYER. And in this recognition and this embrace of your own playfulness, you can reap its many benefits that would otherwise elude you.
I can say this from the perspective of one who was fortunate to be grounded in a playful secure family, and who later as a research physician–psychiatrist discovered that violent antisocial men—murderers—and others whose lives demonstrated extreme deficiencies in play differed substantively from those whose play was sufficient. From this research base, I have had the opportunity to review the play backgrounds of thousands, in highly varied settings, over a 50+ year play‐focused journey. I have also met and learned from animal and human play scholars as well as laboratory‐based basic scientists that, indeed, there is an emergent play science. So whether it is observing bear play in Alaska, or convening scholars to better understand the neuroscience of play, or today finding personal joy in a romp with my dog, my long and rich play odyssey is enriched by this life‐changing book, Julie and Jed's The Playful Life.
What does it mean to be a playful person? What are the varieties of playfulness available but not necessarily incorporated actively and regularly into your life? And if being playful eludes you, how do you find it, revel in its manifold benefits, personalize it so it fits the reality of your current life? This search, and guidance to achieve more play, which are the themes of this book, provide not only individual resources that include personalized fun, innovativeness, and creativity, but also wisdom to find and participate in play‐enhanced communal activities.
In our polarized culture, a playful life has greater capacity for tolerance and problem‐solving than one without play! Play, as depicted so well, is an antidote for a society needing tolerance and compassion for it to function and survive.
So, reading this book can and will be a life‐changer. (And maybe a cultural changer also?)
The following pages provide an enticing, readable entrée into the world of playfulness. They contain plenty of “southernisms” that, nonetheless, provide the wisdom and practicality to overcome the usual barriers that prevent most of us from becoming fully (and playfully) what is our common, waiting‐to‐be‐fully activated, human endowment.
This book is written by two educators who have both traveled personal and professional routes to discover and prioritize, understand and enact, this essential and—from my seasoned viewpoint—instinctively necessary (and at its core a survival necessity) component of our shared human nature.
Their classroom educator experience and personal travels have grounded them in the need for play. The Playful Life brings into reach more play for all of us.
What a gift!
So this Foreword is prompted by my respect for Julie and Jed, whose life experiences and play‐based scholarship have produced this accessible book. It well describes and solidifies the long, more scholarly research‐based journey into play science that I have enjoyed.
And, this is a fun book to read. Beyond that, reading it shows—in virtually every page—the need for all of us to recognize the importance of our play natures, and to prioritize and activate them as our essential play design dictates.
—Stuart Brown
ABOUT THE AUTHORS
Since starting her career in 1999, Dr. Julie Jones has had an exceptional journey in education. She has taught 4th, 5th, 7th, 8th, and 9th through 12th grades in both general and special education, as well as teacher education courses at the University of South Carolina and Converse University. As an innovative educational development professional, she maintains an active research agenda with interests including instructional technology and pedagogy, always with a mix of creativity and play. She is an educational consultant for the Hub City Writers Project, spearheading the Books as Mirrors program, which ensures children see themselves in the books they read. Before working on the We Are Playful … series, she was the editor of the Teacher Education Journal of South Carolina, and past president of the South Carolina Association of Teacher Educators. Follow her on Twitter @JuliePJones, and view her full curriculum vitae at www.juliepjones.com.
Jed Dearybury began his education career in 2001. During his 13‐year early childhood classroom tenure, Jed received numerous honors. He was featured in GQ magazine as Male Leader of the Year, met President Obama as the South Carolina winner of the Presidential Award for Excellence in Math and Science Teaching, and was named as a top 5 finalist for South Carolina Teacher of the Year. While working on the We Are Playful … series, Jed has been leading professional development across the country, as well as training the next generation of educators through his work in higher ed. Since August 2019, he has been the Director of Creativity and Innovation at MrDearybury.com LLC. His mission: Equip, Encourage, Empower the teaching profession using creativity, laughter, and hands‐on fun! Connect with him online on Twitter @mrdearybury or www.mrdearybury.com.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
Dearest Reader,
Thank you for picking up this book. If not for you reading these words, the message and your inclination to play might not have had the chance to ignite. Let that fire burn! This journey could not have happened without several key players, listed here in no particular order.
New walking shoes, which provided the bounce for idea percolation.
Peter and Paul Reynolds, for helping us to be happy dreamers.
The caffeine, whether hot or cold, provideth stimulation and sustenance.
Those pimento cheese biscuits: ’nuff said.
Melissa Walker … forever and always our continuous guide.
Tabitha Brown … and Donna … for the laughter and moments of truth.
Life changes that force us to confront trauma and write our experiences.
Coffee shops that are open on Sundays.
Google for always being present with answers to our random questions:
100 ways to cook an egg
The domestication of the potato
What is a Peter Pan's age?
How much money does Dabo make?
How to you spell kumquat?
Is cornhole one word or two?
Trisha at the pottery place for the stroke and coat.
Landa and the couch. Laina for the appointment booking.
Matt Matt … because he is ever so patient with both of us.
Amy Fandrei and the people in that room who continue to believe in us and the work we do.
The small humans in our lives who keep us humble.
Our cool glasses that help us see the world through a playful lens.
Julie and Jed
SECTION 1Meaning
Evidence of play goes back to the beginning of humanity. A spinning top was discovered in an ancient Egyptian tomb, a baby's rattle was unearthed in Turkey, and a doll's head was found in the ruins of a hut on the Italian island of Pantelleria. The toys are estimated to have been between four and six thousand years old. While those “play purdies” (what our grannies used to call toys) are extremely old in age, the Strong National Museum of Play, also known as The Strong, named after its founder, Margaret Woodbury Strong, has named one toy the oldest of all: the stick. Yep, y'all read that right … a stick. Just a plain ol' stick laying in the yard right outside.
There are lots of ideas in our world of what play is, and most of them have to do with objects. Play is more than the stick. Play isn't the toy or the [insert object of choice].
Play is the opportunity for creativity and innovation.
Play is the spontaneous act resulting from curiosity or wonder.
Play is both free and structured, both behavior and mindset.
The top, the rattle, and the doll are all objects that allow children to be creative and invent new ideas and explore concepts, that allow for their users to be curious, and invite them to play and be playful.
In this section, we break down the meaning of play. In starting with a conversation on meaning, we're ensuring that we're all talking about the same thing. But before we do, let's chat about that stick for a minute. Take a gander at this bit from The Strong regarding their selection. Sticks:
Promote free play—the freedom to invent and discover. They encourage playing outside instead of inside. Sticks are all around us; they are natural and free. And playing with sticks isn't just for children and animals. Adult artists, crafters, decorators, and architects all make use of sticks in sculptures, wreaths, furniture, and building design. Few adults or children can resist simple play with sticks—from drawing in the sand on the beach, to building a campfire and then toasting marshmallows. Sticks are not only possibly the oldest toys, they're possibly the best! (The Strong, 2021)
Here's the thing, y'all … like they said, play is not just for kids! So many people say to us some variation of—oh you wrote a book on play! I'd love to buy that for my grandkids. Bless their hearts. Play is so much more than toys and running around the yard. The origins of the word play include old English—plegian (exercise)/plega (brisk movement)—and middle Dutch—pleien—meaning to leap for joy, dance (Definition and Etymology of Play, n.d.). Our hearts are full just reading it and we cannot wait for you to dig into the power of play for your every day.
CHAPTER 1Wanna Play?
So we've gotten you excited and now you wanna be playful, do ya?
A lot of us have want in our lives. We want abs, to own a big mansion, to travel around the world to exotic places, etc. etc., but we don't always wanna reckon with the work that it takes to get there. All these aren't always easy for the average person to achieve. They take a lot of time and effort, and often money that many of us don't have.
I (Jed) confess that I have wanted nice abs as bad as a mule wants a pickle patch for my whole life. I have always had this adorable little spare tire around my waist, and I would love to be able to do yoga without my belly gettin' in the way, but I have done literally nothing in my life to get them. Julie and I had a great laugh as we talked about my stomach prohibiting my doing advanced yoga. We know many of you will relate. I am not sure why my girthy abdominal area has always been such a nuisance for me, but alas it has. Even when I was at the peak of my own personal fitness journey from 2009 to 2018, a flat stomach eluded me. I ran almost every day during those years. Some days I ran one mile, some days 26. I put in the training to run seven full marathons over that time period, but not once did I ever lay in the floor (in the South we say “in the floor”) and do crunches or planks. All of the books I read about running said that a strong core would help me. I knew that the abs I always dreamed of were in that floor. But alas, I never got down there to get them. I guess I don't want those abs so bad after all, do I? Of course I want them, but the reality is this: their importance wasn't/isn't significant enough to drive me to the floor to work out and get them. Maybe one day.
Why am I talking about abs in a book about becoming more playful? This is why:
A playful life takes work, y'all.
“Wait! I need life to be more fun and peaceful, not more work and stress.”
We hear y'all yellin' that at us. We agree. You do need play in your life—we all do. But to get it takes some intentional work and reflection on the things in our lives that are keeping us from fun and peace.
Julie and I have to work at being more playful every day. Sometimes we get to our coffee shop and the world is caving in on us. Writing deadlines, work ridiculousness, financial stress, family drama … all the things you deal with, too. The exhaustion of it all can be overwhelming. The instinctive reaction that many of us have when life brings All. The. Heaviness. is to curl up in a ball and pull the covers over our head while we ignore the world.
Sometimes, that is exactly the best thing to do.
When we began to research the effect playfulness had on our brains (that's coming in Section Two), things began to change for us. When the woes of life tried to interfere with our days, we would seek out moments of play to help us through. Some days we would walk on our local rail trail. Some days we would go to Target. Some days we would play rock, paper, scissors just for the fun of it. Our favorite thing? Doodlin'. Many days we get out our bullet journals (Leuchtturm 1917, size A5, if anyone wants to know) and doodle. Yes, doodle—not draw. Draw is a word that can be intimidating to many folks. “I can't draw” is a common phrase we hear. But have you ever heard anyone say “I can't doodle”? No way. Anyway, we'd start doodlin' and things would start to turn around in our day. We love to do collaborative doodles too. Julie will draw something, then I'll add to it. Her turn, then my turn again. We do this in our journals, on scrap paper. Lawd, we've even used small beverage napkins. After just a few minutes, we have a fun page of art. Y'all know what else we created? A moment of playfulness that helped us forget about the heaviness for a bit. Notice I said “a bit.” It is not that playfulness made the hard things go away. It didn't solve all of our problems by any means. The angst that we brought into the coffee shop was/is still there, but what did go away was the unfocused mind, the overwhelmed heart, the anger, the bitterness—all the emotions that were holding us back from figuring out how to live in that moment.
What came from the doodlin?
A better mood.
A bit of clarity.
A bit of strength.
A bit of courage.
The energy we needed to help us face the challenges of the day arrived as we giggled at the fun that came to life before our very eyes because we took a moment to play. Imagine if we had just sat there sulking, pouting, fussing, whining… . Our moods would have worsened, headaches would have likely arrived, and the problems still would have needed our attention. All the while we would be in pain and in a pissy mood.
Think of all the people who could be negatively impacted by our unchecked mood (moooooed, we do love a cow!) that day had we not found some playfulness. The drivers we encounter on the roads, the clerks at the stores we visited, the strangers we stand beside in line at the grocery store, those we text, call, or email, our friends, our family. As I think about interrupting someone's good day with my bad attitude, I think of my friend Tabitha Brown. Yes, I call her a friend even though I don't know her very well. She and I did speak at the same conference one year, and she does follow me on Instagram, so that makes us besties, right? Anyway, she has the best saying when it comes to this very topic. She says, “Have a good day, and if you can't … don't go messing up nobody else's.” She's so wise, y'all. If you don't know her, look her up right now. Seriously, put this book down and find her. She embodies a playful life. When we watch her, listen to her, read her book, or engage with her on social media, we always feel that she is taking a playful approach to life. Julie and I both read her book Feeding the Soul (Because It's My Business): Finding Our Way to Joy, Love, and Freedom while writing this book. Her work impacted us both and we were texting constantly about the inspirational words she was sharing. We loved it so much that we began to listen to the audio version so that we could hear her voice. Even the way she speaks is playful. It must be our Southern bond that attracts us to her fun speaking voice. She mentions that she was often made fun of professionally because of her Southern twang, and Julie and I both relate to that deeply. But the way Tab handles it exudes the playful life. She doesn't run from her accent—she embraces it. In fact, the way she embraces every trial and tribulation that comes her way has an element of playfulness to it. She looks for ways to press on through the heaviness with laughter and fun. Don't mishear us here, though. Tears are absolutely gonna happen, and sometimes the heartaches will still be bigger than we can handle. As Adele said in her recent interview with Oprah, sometimes you gotta sit in those feelings (of course, she said this in a British, not a Southern, accent) (CBS, 2021). It boils down to this: a playful spirit will pull us through.
The gift that Tabitha's work brings to the world and how it connects to the power of play in our lives is this: feed your soul, honey. Play feeds every part of who you are. Playfulness and the positive effect it has on us as humans is so deeply intertwined in our DNA that our brains have adapted to release all the feel‐good chemicals we need to thrive as a species while we play. It's true. Catecholamine, dopamine, norepinephrine, anandamide, serotonin … all of that floods our minds when we experience moments of play (Basso & Suzuki, 2017). And one of them, serotonin, even helps you poop (GI Society, 2022)! Who isn't happier when they are having good poops?
JULIE:
JED:
JULIE:
JED:
I love to poop. I feel better after I do. I will not apologize. That is all.
JULIE:
While Jed has run to the potty (bless his heart), I'm taking over. Julie here.
As you are about to read in the next chapter, there is a framework of developing a playful mindset that will help us look into the nooks and crannies of our lives. The places that could use a pick‐me‐up. Right now there may be cobwebs there. Maybe a speck or two of dust. Possibly a dead possum if it's been a while since we looked into these spaces of life. But in these spaces lies lots of potential for us to experience playfulness. To do that, we must first become aware of their presence and the possibility that they have. Becoming aware often starts with reflective questions.
Before we get to that part (we see some of you skipping ahead—stop that. Get back here!), we want a bit of a disclaimer here. We are very intentional in our writing about saying “we and us” instead of you, you, you. Sometimes books talk at you instead of with you. They feel a bit preachy. A bit off‐putting.
We need you to know that we are in this with you. We're trying to figure out how to make our lives more playful right alongside you. But for this next little bit we want to use the upcoming questions to reflect on ourselves. We acknowledge that we are not all in the same boat, and that many of us have privileges far above others to create a playful life. The fact that we're writing and you're reading these words shows privilege for us both. How?
We're sitting at a table writing these words on laptops with a hot beverage beside us.
We bought that beverage with money we earned.
We have money in our bank account (not much, mind you … we are educators in the United States).
We have the freedom to carve boundaries and creative time in our day.
We have access to playful spaces, playful people, and playful ideas.
Because of all these resources, we recognize our privilege and we know that our readers may or may not relate.
Please hear this: no matter the resources in our lives, we all have access to our minds, moods, and mojo. A bit of self‐reflection will help us all to focus on what we do have and how these personal resources can help or hinder our individual playful lives.
Like Tabitha says, “Get into it, y'all.”
As we mentioned, the nooks and crannies need some attention first. Let's consider the following questions together. We'll answer them honestly. Write your answers here if you want, or maybe even grab some paper and doodle your thoughts as you read. Right now is a great time to create a playful moment.
People
Who are the people around
you
most?
How do they inspire
you
to be more playful?
Do they wanna play with
you,
or do they think it's silly?
Are they keeping
you
in a box or helping you transform the box into a really cool homemade rocket ship so that you can zoom to the stars?
Learn
Are
you
willing to learn new things?
Are
you
willing to apply new learning to multiple areas of your life?
Are
you
willing to help others around you learn what you are learning?
Are
you
willing to unlearn all that you have been taught about the way grownups should “behave” in regard to playing?
Accept
Can
you
accept people for who they are?
Can
you
accept that this journey may be uncomfortable at times?
Can
you
accept that we all play differently, and that this difference is beautiful?
Can
you
accept that what you have always been taught about play may be wrong?
You
Have
you
noticed that all of the questions here have something to do with
YOU
?
Being playful, whether you are at work, at home, or out with your friends, has everything to do with you. Your mindset, your mood, your mojo, your mates (like they say down under)—YOU.
And guess what, it's different for everyone. That's what's so jazzy about it. (Jed here—Jazzy? I'm picturing you singing in Rose Apothecary alongside Moira and the Jazzagals right now. Those ladies were the epitome of the playful life!)
<<pause for silent stare>>
<<proceeds to type>>
Jed and I play differently, but there's enough overlap that we enjoy a lot of time together. Enough differences that we bicker like siblings.
We all play according to our personalities because we are all uniquely designed, playful individuals. We've got a lot of ground to cover, a lot of diggin' to do. We're gonna get real personal.
We hope you're honest with yourself.
We're gonna lead you to water, but doggone it you gotta put your head down in it and take a big ole drink drank (Yes, drank.)
<<Julie cuts eyes at Jed.>>
<< Jed nods his head and sips his herbal tea.>>
CHAPTER 2Defining Play
All of us have played, we hope. Despite our location, our culture, and our socioeconomic status, life brings us moments of play whether we seek them out or they seem to manifest randomly.
A funny noise. (Tell us a poot doesn't make you giggle.)
Tension broken by a chuckle. (We always seem to get tickled during a prayer.)
That little dance you do at a door if you leave when someone else tries to enter a room. (Imagine if you really dance while doing it.)
The sudden smell of fried chicken in your office at 8 a.m. (Gimme a biscuit, y'all.)
The times where laughter erupts, where smiles are big, where hearts are tingly, where our minds are distracted from the conundrums of life. (Have you played the game Taco, Cat, Goat, Cheese, Pizza?)
Regardless of what we all know about the definition of play, it's safe to say most of us could describe the feeling of it rather than wordsmith an actual definition. Before we get too deep here, we must tell you—academics have yet to agree on a definition of play. Some say it is merely the work of the child. Some say it's all fun and no rigor. Some say that it has to come after the “serious work.” Some even think that it's just a bunch of toys and games (you read that intro, right?). We've got opinions about all these definitions and those will come out more as you continue to read this book.
As we were writing this work, we stopped to ask people on the streets of our hometown how they define play.
Here's what we got:
Having fun.
Board games with friends.
What you do at recess.
What kids do.
What is that? (laughs)
I can't define it but I know I'm too tired to do it.
Something I used to do when I was little.
Something kids these days don't know how to do.
Something you don't do in the street. LOL.
Dressing up a Barbie.
Building a sandcastle at the beach.
Even Google has an opinion. The first definition offered in our quick search says play is “an activity engaged in for enjoyment and recreation, especially by children.” Another definition in these results implies that play is an activity for enjoyment and recreation rather than for a serious or practical purpose.
Y'all. We've clearly got some work to do. We'll go ahead and step a toe up on our soapbox. Play is definitely is these answers, but gosh it's so much more. Play can be free. But play can also be calculated.
Play. Can. Be. Rigorous.
Have you ever experienced a chess match? That experience is most definitely playing, but think about the amount of brain power it takes to win a round of that game. We get a bit fired up when someone tells us that play isn't for the intellectual. You can guarantee we'll make eye contact with each other across the room and silently bless your heart. Not to be snooty here, but we are talking to those of you who are so high in the ivory tower that you've forgotten the true power of play in your own life. That's why we have a whole section titled “Memory.” Way too many of us have forgotten all we learned from play and its benefits in our lives.
Regardless of what the doubters, the naysayers, the uppities, the misinformed say about the actual meaning of the word, the connotation of “play” we all tend to agree on is the resulting feeling of lightness, both in attitude and in work. Read that again—we did not say the work is light. Rather, the feeling of engagement is light. Play and work can be synonymous, and for those who love their jobs, play and work are often the same. Play is definitely one of the most elusive words out there. In English, we use it in so many ways, there's no wonder we are so confused. We don't know whether to scratch our watch or wind our butts (yes, that's a nod to Dolly Parton as Truvy—we're big fans). Let's take a look at some of the possible meanings of play we've heard.
“Y'all wanna play?” (a behavior).
“Stop that playin' now! Straighten up” (acting up, being silly).
“Oh, that's nothin'. I was just playin'” (joking).
“They play guitar pretty well—you should take a listen” (making music).
“She plays first base” (a position in a game).
“Let's take a play break” (a moment of respite).
“Let's go watch a play tonight” (a theater performance).
“You best not be playin' with me” (messin' around).
“He made the game‐winning play” (sports move).
“He played the peacemaker in that meeting” (assume a role/act as).
“They play the races” (bet on).
“How did that play out?” (happen).
“He played his cards right” (handle a situation well).
“That was a play for sympathy” (an attempt to obtain).
It's no wonder the definition of play is so elusive. We seem to use the word to mean so much, yet the responses from our simple question are focused on childhood behaviors.
When most people hear play, they think of the behavior—check back to the list of answers we got on the street. They think of monkey bars and swings.
Hide‐and‐seek and Red Rover. Red light, green light, and Doggie Doggie Who's Got the Bone?
Four square.
Freeze tag.
Mother, may I?
A tisket, a tasket.
Sardines.
Pickle.
Yes, they're right. But let's expand this concept—there's play. Then there's playful. One describes a behavior, the other a mindset. We're going to talk about both.
Play is throwing a frisbee in the yard or painting what you see or reading for pleasure.
Playfulness is the tendency to smile or laugh during all of these activities.
Play is looking through 3D glasses.
Playfulness is the way we see the world.
Play is skipping or frolicking.
Playfulness is the inclination to do so.
Play is a behavior—the act of singing or competing in a race.
Playfulness is a mindset—an approach to each situation with intentional fun.
