Autism in Lockdown E-Book

Temple Grandin

• Herausgeber: Future Horizons
• Kategorie: Ratgeber
• Sprache: Englisch

Seitenzahl: 288

Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2020

Beschreibung

Autism and Lockdown includes Tips and Insights from the World's Leading Experts on subjects such as:

Carol Gray – Social Stories for a pandemic

Dr. Tony Attwood – Latest Research on Autism and Covid 19

Temple Grandin – How the Lockdown is Affecting Me

Carol Kranowitz – Sensory “Quinks” for Cooped-Up Days

Dr. Jed Baker – Anxiety, Autism, and the Coronavirus

Dr. Wendy – How to Deal with Sudden Homeschooling Jim Ball – Maintaining Good Behavior During Lockdown

Beth Aune – OT Support for Sensory, Motor Skills and Self-care

Anita Lesko – My Experiences as a Woman with Autism in the Medical Professional

Sean Barron – How to Cope During Lockdown

Katie Saint and Carlos Torres – Autism and Depression during Covid 19

Leseprobe

AUTISM IN LOCKDOWN

All marketing and publishing rights guaranteed to and reserved by:

[phone](817) 277-0727(817) 277-2270 (fax)E-mail: [email protected]

© 2020 Future HorizonsAll rights reserved.Printed in USA.

No part of this product may be reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission of Future Horizons, Inc., except in the case of brief quotations embodied in reviews or unless noted within the book.

ISBN: 978-1949177534

eBook Designed by Acepub

CONTENTS

Introduction

PART 1COPING

COVID-19 and Autism

Dr. Tony Attwood

Carol’s Club Pandemic Stories

Carol Gray

Dealing with the New Normal

Jed Baker, PhD

Tips for Connecting with and Supporting Your Child during Lockdown

Dr. Roya Ostovar and Dr. Krista DiVittore

Depression during the Lockdown

Dr. Katherine Saint and Carlos Torres, BS

Tools for Stress Management

Raun D. Melmed, MD, FAAP

PART 2INSIGHTS FROM THE SPECTRUM

Temple in Lockdown

Temple Grandin, PhD

How to Cope during Lockdown

Sean Barron

Staying Sane during the COVID-19 Lockdown

Anita Lesko

Everyone, Go to Your Rooms

Bella, Evelyn, and Bobbi Sheahan

PART 3HOMESCHOOLING AND BEHAVIOR MANAGEMENT

Homeschooling Your Student on the Spectrum: START from Your Hammock

Wendela Whitcomb Marsh, MA, BCBA, RSD

Now YOU Are the Teacher…

Dr. Diana Friedlander

Homeschooling and Homework: How Do We Accomplish It without Behaviors?

Sheila Wagner, MEd

Build Structure for Better Behavior

Jim Ball, EdD, BCBA-D

Behavior and Transitions

Dr. Cara Koscinski

PART 4ACTIVITIES AND OCCUPATIONAL THERAPY

In-Sync Activities to Help Kids Cope with Being Cooped Up

Carol Stock Kranowitz, MA

Keeping Your Vision in Sync

Joye Newman, MA

The 3 E’s for Home and School: Environment, Engagement, and Education

Beth Aune, OT/L

Creating a Sensory Environment

Nancy Kashman and Janet Mora

Executive Function and Character Development in Lockdown: A Sensory Perspective

Paula Aquilla

Sher Activities

Barbara Sher

PART 5PRACTICAL MATTERS

For Autism Parents and Advocates: 13 Steps to Take when Leaders Fall Short

Ellen Notbohm

Financial Planning during a Crisis: Autism in Lockdown

Stephen Sicoli

Solutions for Parents of Kids with Autism during Lockdown

Karen Simmons and Ronald Caissie

PART 6SURVIVING AND THRIVING

Cookies, Catastrophes, and Car Rides

Elizabeth King Gerlach

Building Family Resiliency

Hartley Steiner

Attitude of Gratitude for Autism

Karen Simmons

Thriving on a Theme

Julie Clark

The Palmers are Flourishing in the New Normal

Melissa Palmer, MD

INTRODUCTION

This book would, quite simply, not exist without the Future Horizons and Sensory World authors who made it happen. I want to thank everyone for their swiſt and generous contributions. On April 25, I asked if any authors were interested in contributing to a little book about the quarantine, and the response was overwhelming. I don’t say that lightly. The flood of response to my inbox literally brought tears to my eyes. Everyone wanted to help. We have the best authors in the world.

As you can imagine with such a project, time was of the essence. This book is one that is needed NOW, not next year (hopefully). The nine to twelve months we usually spend bringing a book from manuscript to final version had to be completed in just a few weeks.

To speed things along and get the needed information into your hands more quickly, we had to forgo the weeks of copyediting that usually go into a book. So please forgive any minor errors you may come across. You won’t find perfection, but you will find information that is both insightful and helpful.

Also, the articles may have some overlap. We did not have the time for each author to see the final product and make minor adjustments. If you see that several authors mention a subject in their writings, this just means that issue is even more important.

This is the first book we made, knowing it would soon be obsolete. Soon enough we will not need this book, but you can keep it on your shelf as a collector’s item.

Thank you so much and I hope this information helps you and your family during the quarantine months. Hang in there, everyone.

Jennifer Gilpin Yacio

President

Future Horizons

It is important to remember that kids with autism have an acute sensitivity to anxiety in others. Anxiety is contagious.

There are so many reasons to be anxious all around us these days. We have news reports that discuss the ‘killer’ virus, along with a number of people who have died. And this number is rising, yet to reach the peak. Yet another reason to be worried!

Kids with autism are feeling the pain of the world. They see scenes on television and have such empathy, that they have trouble moving on from what they have seen.

They are likely to develop anxiety for the health of their parents and/or grandparents. Add to that the fear of uncertainty. We are in uncertain times. This is challenging for all of us, but more so for people with autism, who rely on routine so strongly.

So, what do we do? Family and caregivers must be calm, confident and optimistic, so their kids can pick up on this attitude. If fear is contagious, so is calm.

One way to keep a sense of calm in your household is to limit your news time. Watch the news once a day, not continuous 24-hour news cycle. Then turn it off and go play a game or take a walk. Discuss what you have seen and what gives you hope. Help them digest what they have just seen.

INCREASE IN THE SIGNS OF AUTISM

Many of the characteristics of autism are coping mechanisms or associated with anxiety and stress. So, when stress levels go up, so do the signs of autism.

You may very well see an increase in social withdrawal, routines and rituals, sensory sensitivity, and engagement in their special interest.

MANAGING INTENSE ANXIETY

So, what do we do to take care of the anxiety causing the rise in autistic behaviour? As we discussed earlier, family and caregivers need to remain calm.

First off, validate their feelings. You can say something like, “I can see that you are feeling worried about the future, and that is understandable”.

Please, do not ask the person to explain what they are anxious about. This may cause even more anxiety and you may see a lack of eloquence, coherence and sequence in their attempt to explain. What you need to do is move through and out of the distress, not return to where it began.

If the person is unreasonable at this stage, then reason will be ineffective. Empathize and explain that the intense anxiety or distress will go away.

Praise and encourage them as they become calmer and share gratitude that the anxiety is going away.

Validate and sit with feelings as they decompress. Help them notice feelings in their body, then use a strategy to help reach a calmer state of mind (e.g. grounding, breathing, act in line with values and goals etc).

INFORMATION

Sharing information during a crisis is necessary. Yet how do we do this without causing more distress? Try to share the information you have in an honest, reassuring and practical way.

Model how to cope with the information they are receiving. Do this by vocalizing your thoughts. This helps encourage positive self-talk.

Health is on everyone’s mind and the inherent difficulty of perceiving low-level signs of infection and pain are an aspect of autism that is relevant in determining if the kid is coming down with the virus. Use a thermometer for objective information. If they do not show a fever, this may help calm anxieties.

CHANGES IN DAILY ROUTINE

Everyone’s routines are disrupted, and new routines are taking their place. It is important to help people with autism cope with change as much as possible.

Suddenly everything is on hold. It is like a holiday, but we are unable to do what you like to do on a holiday. This is very frustrating.

We are not having family gatherings and outings anymore and cannot see the people we may want to see. This is even more frustrating and sometimes anxiety producing. What if something happens to our loved ones while we are away from them? This uncertainty is tough for all of us to deal with, but we know our loved ones are also being safe in their homes. Explain that and explain what makes you feel safe about your loved ones who are away from you. Spend some quality time with people you are worried about on a video chat.

We all have so much more free time and it is important that this time is not totally taken up by the computer. DO get outside if you can. A walk can do wonders for your mind. Also important is having a ‘to do’ list of things you can complete around the house to get rid of the anxiety energy you now have. Some of the best activities are those that bring order out of chaos, such as decluttering the attic or basement. Organize your closet and get rid of old clothes. When you create order out of chaos, you gain a sense of control in an uncontrolled world. This is necessary for our collective sanity right now.

STRATEGIES TO MANAGE STRESS

There is often conflict in the family due to being cooped up together. It is easy to take up your frustrations on the ones you are stuck with but try to use some anger management and step away when you find yourself losing your sense of calm.

As much as you can, maintain a routine and make sure to include exercise and yoga/meditation. If you have therapy, continue this therapy via Zoom or Skype. Most therapists are still available for you.

Do a quick medication review. Do any dosages need to change? Talk to your medical doctor.

On the plus side (and there is always a plus side), life is now more autism friendly. There are no touching and hugs on greeting and no crowds. How lovely!

And let’s end on the important note that vaccines are being developed by scientists, many of whom have autism. We need scientists with autism to end the pandemic. People who are very much like you are needed now more than ever. 

DR. TONY ATTWOOD is a practicing clinical psychologist with more than 25 years of experience. He has worked with over 2,000 individuals of all ages with Asperger’s syndrome. He presents workshops and runs training courses for parents, professionals, and individuals with AS all over the world, and is a prolific author of articles and books on the subject. He is the author of multiple books, including the Exploring Feelings series, The Complete Guide to Asperger’s Syndrome, and the co-author of Autism and Girls: World-Renowned Experts Join Those with Autism Syndrome to Resolve Issues That Girls and Women Face Every Day!

I receive many requests for Social StoriesTM on a variety of topics. Some of the most difficult topics are related to catastrophes, shootings, natural disasters, and most recently, the COVID-19 pandemic. Initially these topics can seem to defy description or explanation and hold me hostage to an uncomfortable writer’s block. What’s interesting about Social StoriesTM, though, is that the defined format rescues me every time. It focuses my thoughts and creates an unexpected “angle” or route through a difficult topic that wasn’t part of my original plan. These “discovered” Stories seem to have something for everyone, of any age, and enjoy instant popularity as they are released.

This was the case with “Third Grade Isn’t a Place” and “Watching a Pandemic on Television.” I began writing each of them with a clear outline in mind, only to have them dissolve in favor of unexpected Stories that seemed to write themselves.

Stay Safe and Take Care,

Carol Gray

WATCHING A PANDEMIC ON TELEVISION

A pandemic is when many people in a large area become sick with the same illness. A new virus called COVID-19 has caused a worldwide pandemic. Each day there is news about the pandemic. People watch television for information. It’s helpful to understand what I see and hear.

Many children find that it is easier to learn about a pandemic with an adult. Adults have lived a long time. They have seen many serious reports on television and can answer questions. Talking with adults helps many children feel less confused and more comfortable again.

Reporters go to communities and hospitals to talk with experts. They talk to people about the pandemic and take videos and photos to show on television. What I see on television may not be happening now.

Other times, a newscast may be “live.” When this happens, what I see on television is happening at the same time someplace else.

Many newer televisions have a big, sharp picture screen. This makes it fun to watch my shows because it feels so realistic, like I am really there. When news about a pandemic is on television, it’s helpful to remember that I am not there. Only the television is in my home, not the COVID-19 virus or the pandemic.

During a pandemic, my family may be home for a while. We may have new routines. Some routines will be about the same as before the pandemic. For example, if we usually have dinner at about 6 o’clock, and it’s almost 6 o’clock now, we’ll probably be having dinner soon. In fact, many other families will also be having dinner soon.

During a pandemic, children and adults may feel worried or concerned. They know that many people are very sick. It’s safe and okay to feel uncomfortable for a while. Adults can help.

Very young children may be quite happy. They may not be worried or confused. This is okay. They are too young to understand about pandemics.

A very big pandemic will be on television for many days. The same video or story may be on tv many times. This may make it seem like a sad event is happening over and over, even though it happened once.

During a pandemic, people on television may use confusing words or phrases. For example, someone may say that our country is “at war,” even though our country is not fighting with another country. In this case, “at war” means that the pandemic is a problem for everyone, and we are working hard to end it. Parents can help if I am confused by words or phrases that I hear on television.

As I grow, knowing about serious events on television may make it easier for me to understand what I am seeing, and to know what to do. It’s safe to feel confused, sad, or concerned, and to ask questions. Many people feel that way about pandemics. There may be things we can all do to help.

THIRD GRADE ISN’T A PLACE. THIS IS OKAY.

I am a third grader in Miss Scott’s classroom at Lincoln School. Avs long as I am in third grade, I am a third grader, even when I am not in Miss Scott’s classroom, too! That’s because third grade isn’t a place.

This school year, I am a third grader wherever I go. I am in third grade at school, home, and the grocery store; and on Saturdays, Sundays, and during the holidays, too!

Being a third grader means that I am part of a group of kids who are about the same age and learning similar things.

We started third grade in a classroom. Miss Scott gave us assignments to practice new skills.

She checked our work to be sure that we understood.

Now there is a pandemic. Pandemics happen once in a very long while. A pandemic is when many people in a large area become sick. COVID-19 is a virus that is moving around the world from one person to another.

This past March, people began staying home from school and work to stay safe from COVID-19 and keep it from spreading. Lincoln School closed to keep students healthy. It took adults a few weeks to decide the best place for children to finish their school year.

Adults have decided the safest place for children to finish their school year is at home. Miss Scott’s classroom is closed. This is okay. Third grade is open. Working at home is another way to finish being a third grader.

Just like before the pandemic, Miss Scott gives us assignments to practice new skills, and checks our work to be sure that we understand.

Our moms, dads, grandparents, or older brothers or sisters may help, too. When they were younger, they learned the skills that we are learning now. They may know how to help if we are confused or stuck.

Miss Scott is teaching us all that we need to know to finish third grade. That way, we’ll be ready to start fourth grade. 

CAROL GRAY is the author of The New Social StoryTMBook. She has over twenty-five years of experience educating students with autism. Carol initiated the use of Social Stories™ in 1991 and has written numerous articles, chapters, and books on the subject. Currently, Carol works privately with students, parents, and professionals in a variety of educational and vocational settings. Every year, Carol gives many presentations and workshops throughout the world. She addresses topics related to the teaching of social understanding, bullying prevention, and friendship skills. Carol has received several awards for her work and international contributions to the education of individuals with autism and those who work on their behalf. She lives in Grand Rapids, Michigan.

WHAT DO I TELL MY KIDS ABOUT COVID-19?

Tell your kids what they need and want to know, but no need to introduce traumatizing stories of those struggling to breathe or dying separated from their family. Here’s what you can say:

FOR VERBAL KIDS: Explain that there is a virus that is very tiny you cannot see it. It is very contagious, which means it’s easy for one person to give it to another when they are near each other. If people breathe it into their bodies through their nose or mouth or get it in their eyes, it can make people sick. Most people will not get sick from it; but some may have a fever, cough and some shortness of breath for a week or two. A few people, especially the elderly, can get very sick and need to go to the hospital.

To protect yourself from getting it or spreading it to others, we must stay at least 6 feet or more from others and wear a mask in public areas to cover our mouths and noses. If no one has the virus in your family you do not have to stay away from family members. If you touch things in public or packages delivered to your house, wash your hands afterwards before touching your face.

FOR LESS VERBAL KIDS: Use the following link from Autism Society of America to find a good picture story that explain these same ideas through a comic book like sequence: https://theautismeducator.ie/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/The-Corona-Virus-Free-Printable-Updated-2-The-Autism-Educator-.pdf?fbclid=IwAR0R3o7TJSgqoZ3_0aEZnFDt8X0qVfszz-3Bu8izIbuQT3n8RxqI7U5SHcQg. The picture sequence can serve as a start to show how the virus can make people sick, the need to wash your hands, and how some places are closed. Industrious parents may want to use the format to make their own picture books with pictures of their family and places they used to go.

WHAT IF MY CHILDREN ARE WORRIED THEY OR FAMILY MEMBERS WILL GET VERY SICK?

As I describe in my book, Overcoming Anxiety in Children and Teens (Baker 2015), there are several ways to rein in out-of-control anxiety.

For verbal kids, try getting them to “Think Like a Scientist.” Scientist use scientific evidence and reasoning to help guide their beliefs. When individuals have run away fears, we always ask two questions to help them think like a scientist:

Are you overestimating the probability of something bad happening? Fearful thought: “I will get COVID and get very sick!” Let’s look at the evidence. Most individuals are at very low risk of becoming ill. Both because they can lower the risk of getting the virus and because they are unlikely to get gravely ill from it. There are many things we can do to dramatically lower the probability of getting COVID-19. Social distancing, hand hygiene, not touching your face, and wearing protective gear like masks all limit the possibility of getting the virus.

Are you overestimating the severity of illness from COVID-19? Fearful thought: “If I get it I will die.” Let’s look at the evidence. Though there is no doubt COVID-19 can kill some individuals, the vast majority of people have mild or no illness. According to epidemiologists, the death rate may be as low as .5 to 1 percent when

all

the true positive cases are counted. Fatality risk rises for those who are sick enough to need hospital support, but most still survive. That means over 99 percent of people survive.

Thinking like a scientist neither grossly underestimates nor overestimates the risks. The risk to a population is high (1 percent is a lot of people), yet the odds for any individual dying are still extremely low.

WAYS TO TURN DOWN THE VOLUME OF ANXIETY. Besides “thinking like a scientist” there are ways to help reduce the intensity of anxious feelings. We know that sustained exercise that increases heart rate for 30 minutes or more greatly reduces anxiety for hours after the activity. In addition, mindfulness meditation has also been shown to reduce anxiety. Both exercise and mindfulness have been shown to reduce anxiety as well as antidepressant/antianxiety medicines in a handful of studies. I often use a free website, www.fragrantheart.com, for downloading brief audio meditation guides. For less verbal kids who may not understand the language of a meditation guide, relaxing spa like music has been shown to reduce anxiety. For example, just listening to the tune Weightless, by Marconi Union, was shown in a British study to reduce anxiety. Lastly antidepressant/anxiety medications can be a useful tool to reduce anxiety over short or longer periods of time. Though some of these medications are habit forming, many are not and can be used briefly to help folks get through a difficult period of time.

HOW DO I HELP MY KIDS ACCEPT THE NEW LIMITATIONS ON THEIR LIVES?

Although some kids with autism do not seem to mind having activities cancelled or staying close to home, most eventually grow frustrated with having to limit their interactions. One way to motivate compliance with staying away from friends or others is to invoke the notion that such social distancing is heroic. Kids who are willing to stay away from others insure that they and others will not get sick. They are literally saving lives. Ironically, by staying away from the people they miss, they are insuring those people will be around when the COVID-19 crisis is over.

We must also give our kids alternatives to the activities they miss. They can video chat with friends and teachers they miss, participate in hobbies like arts and crafts, cooking, music, dance and exercise. They can and should go outside as long as they maintain a distance from others. They can still order many of the foods they like and play the games they enjoy.

Parents may need a lot of patience with their kids as they slowly grieve the temporary loss of activities. A normal first stage of grief is denial, and kids may refuse to accept the limitations initially. As time goes by their protests may yield to sadness. Eventually though they may come to accept the new normal and embrace new activities to replace what was lost.

HOW DO I HELP MY KID CONTINUE TO LEARN FROM HOME?

As parents scramble to juggle their own work with caring round the clock for their kids and teaching their children at home, it becomes crucial to create some kind of schedule to help structure all this extra home time. Visual schedules can be created with the help of the visual scheduler app and samples of simple schedules for things like getting dressed can be found at the following link: https://www.autismspeaks.org/sites/default/files/2018-08/Visual%20Supports%20Tool%20Kit.pdf. When setting up a schedule, keep in mind that parents do not need to recreate the amount of work attempted in school. For young children, and hour of instruction broken up through the day may be enough. For middle and high school students, several hours of classwork may be more appropriate. The schedule can be set up with less preferred tasks scheduled before a rewarding activity. For example, math followed by dance break, reading followed by game time, science followed by mealtime, etc.

In addition to using rewarding activities to motivate students to do less preferred work tasks, you can also make the work look less intimidating. Shorten the task by limiting the number of items or how long you will work and start with easy items the child can do before frustrating items. Kids are more likely to maintain motivation if they experience success with the work initially. Also, make school tasks more fun by turning desk work into hands-on activities. For example, math and science can become a cooking activity where one must measure out ingredients and halve or double recipes. Reading and writing activities can be set up where kids may have to read words that give clues as to where interesting things are hidden in the house, or write sentences requesting to play games so that the use of language leads to a fun activity.

One of the most important things to teach your children is that they are not supposed to know how to do their work immediately. We must combat the tendency for kids to think they are unintelligent if they do not understand something. We can do this by explaining, before they attempt to work, that they are not supposed to know it, and that people learn by trying, making mistakes and getting help. We can even reward them for trying it, making mistakes and asking for help, rather than rewarding them for correct work. In this way we reward the process of learning rather than the outcome.

Many of these ideas and more can be found in my books, No More Melt-downs and Overcoming Anxiety in Children and Teens available on my amazon author page: https://www.amazon.com/Jed-Baker/e/B001JP01XG/ref=dp_byline_cont_book_1. 

JED BAKER, PhD is the director of the Social Skills Training Project, an organization serving individuals with autism and social communication problems. He writes, lectures, and provides training internationally on the topic of social skills training and managing challenging behaviors. He is an award-winning author of 8 books, including The Social Skills Picture Book; The Social Skills Picture Book for High School and Beyond; No More Meltdowns: Positive Strategies for Managing and Preventing Out-of-Control Behavior; No More Victims: Protecting those with Autism from Cyber Bullying, Internet Predators & Scams; Overcoming Anxiety in Children and Teens; and School Shadow Guidelines. His work has also been featured on ABC World News, Nightline, the CBS Early Show, and the Discovery Health Channel.

If we know anything about kids with autism spectrum disorders, it is that transitions are difficult and require lots of planning and preparation on the parents’ part. So much of parents’ efforts, experiences, education and training focuses on preparing your child so they can respond effectively to change and experience transitions as seamlessly as possible. But how do you prepare your child for the unimaginable and for what you are struggling to understand yourself? That’s what has happened with COVID-19 and the lockdown we are experiencing. Most schools were in session one day and they were not the following day. After-school programs, playgrounds, groups, pools and more closed almost overnight leaving us all in lockdown and at home all day.

Though supporting children full time and around the clock at home seemed daunting at first, once parents found their footing they realized that many of the skills they had learned throughout their child’s life, with slight modifications, could easily translate to the current situation. The tips proposed here are just reminders of what most of you probably already know and have used in the past.

It is likely that with school, extra-curricular activities, and/or appointments prior to the lockdown your child was receiving support in multiple areas from multiple people. Parents are now required to tend to all the needs of the child. Any way that we look at these circumstances, we come to the same conclusion “this is hard.” Parents, we know you are doing the best you can. We encourage you to take moments each day to take care of yourself, too. You are better able to be present and helpful for your child when you set aside some time to take a break, do something you enjoy, and/or make healthy choices for you, too. Give yourself time to rest, reflect, and rejuvenate.

We have the mindset that children with autism are doing their best every day. They are not trying to be uncooperative or difficult. They are not looking for a secondary gain or manipulation or pretending to have sensitivities to get special attention. Even if they don’t outwardly show it, every child wants to do better. Their dysregulation often stems from discomfort, feeling unsettled or scared, anxiety or not understanding. In this time of uncertainty, we know that children across the country are doing their best to make sense of it all and we wanted to provide some support and tips for parents looking for some ideas and ways to connect and support their children during lockdown.

The following information is based on Dr. Roya Ostovar’s and Dr. Krista DiVittore’s combined experience working with individuals with autism and other neurodevelopmental disorders, and Dr. Roya Ostovar’s book The Ultimate Guide to Sensory Processing Disorder (2009) and their book 5 Things You Need to Know About Social Skills Coaching (2017).

CONNECTING WITH YOUR CHILD

There are many variations of how your child may respond to the changes in their routine. Children are experiencing daily, sometimes hourly challenges because of a change in their routine, unknown expectations, or confusion. Often, these challenges can be overwhelming and exhausting. This will affect parents and other family members in the home, who can often find it daunting to include their child in everyday activities, especially if those activities involve unpredictable events or environments that are potentially distressing for the child.

Almost everybody is experiencing an increased level of baseline stress at this time, including children. While most adults may be able to articulate their feelings and thoughts about their stress. Children may have more difficulty, and children within the autism spectrum often have even more difficulty. The latter subset of children often is living with neurodevelopmental differences that affect how they experience stress, such as higher or lower sensitivities to their environment, heightened or decreased awareness of their bodily functions, decreased intuitive ability to identify how they feel, etc. They often experience increased distress to transitions, unpredictability, and changes to their routine, all of which may lead to dysregulation. As parents know, their children will communicate distress by “shutting down” or “acting out” with little intuitive ability to communicate what they are feeling or why.

Connecting with them requires the parent to think through ways to increase the likelihood that their child will be able to engage in activities, including connecting with you and the rest of the family. As you have to put on even more hats than usual, including teacher, occupational therapist, social skills coach, etc., we want to encourage you to focus more on your connection with your child and prioritizing that alliance of trust and predictability with you. Here are some potentially helpful strategies to help decrease distress and increase the likelihood that your child will engage with you:

PLANNING.

Creating a weekly and daily schedule can be helpful for your child to transition to a new routine and learn new expectations. These strategies help with organization and structure, reducing unhelpful feelings of anticipation and stress for the child.

If each day or some days are similar, create a checklist that can be laminated for re-use or photocopy that you can quickly fill-in as needed.

Provide written and verbal schedules. Use priming and pre-teaching (exposing the child ahead of time what may arise later) to prepare for what is coming up.

Discuss expectations for the day and for each activity. Include them in planning each day’s events, meal planning, etc. as much as you can.

Prepare the child in advance, as much as you can, for changes or transitions.

LISTEN TO YOUR CHILD.

Words are important, but perhaps even more important, is their behavior. Behavior is a form of communication and a change in behavior can provide very helpful information to identify increasing distress in your child. Instead of focusing on the behavior and what your child is doing or not doing, try to figure out what your child is trying to communicate to you through his or her behavior.

Your child will communicate in some way how they feel about what is occurring around them, with their words, behavior, mood, affect, non-verbal cues (facial expressions, gestures, body language). Being in tune with changes in their behavior can help parents manage expectations, identify potential sources of distress, and help the child re-regulate so they can re-engage.

Gauge how much activity or communication your child is up for having in the moment. Take your child’s lead to determine what and how much they are up for. For example, if they are exhausted or needing movement/sensory stimulation, help them address those needs first.

If your child is showing that they are in a space to engage with you, let them know how proud of them you are in how they are adjusting to the newness, in how they are using their helpful regulation strategies, in the drawings that they have completed since being at home, etc. No accomplishment is too small. Children may not be intuitively motivated to regularly interact, so it is okay to put in the effort to make it a positive interaction for them. Make sure it is genuine!

Engage in preferred topics and interests. Have a conversation that they care about.