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- Herausgeber: Books on Demand
- Kategorie: Gesellschafts- und Liebesromane
- Sprache: Englisch
In the olden times there sat a man in a smoking room filled with peebles whom was all movie around in rythm to a tinny sort of nose emitting from a rotating, flat sphereoid. The man signed deeply, for he had a habitat of doing so... In the 23 different short stories that are in Me Book of Writted Thinks you will encounter ordinary people, strange people, sad people, pirates, ghosts, a fisherman, animals.... and meet such characters as Groobly Dershmant, Ronald Pyddlesnips, Lady Aberdeer, the Pleesemen, and Sad Jim. Written in Selanders unique comedic style filled with puns and nonsense, prepare to be befuddled, fascinated and fully entertained.
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Seitenzahl: 40
Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2017
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Contents
An Happy Birthday Harold
The Great Pirogue Tail
Clam Guthrie and the Village Uproar
Delectable Fedbows Yes’um Thank You Indeed Jeeves Constabulary
Not a Limerick
Hello
Kebin the Slug
Teeth at Midnight
Unwilling and Unable
The Big Yellow Forearmed Cockney Arthur
Crimble Carrot
Billy the Dog
Brimby Gets a Job
Mourning Retina
Five Shillings a Moment
Adolescent Angst
Sad Jim
Morgan Comute
A Dead Inflated Follower of Fashionistas
Pilchard Millagain and the Matriculation Dinner
Lady Aberdeer’s Rubber
The Gohst Writty
OH NO LOOK OUT!!
Bonus Material
Rasmus Selander is the author of this book.
Cover design, layout, drawings, photography (unless where noted) &
some title treatments by Jacob Lindström.
Some other title treatments by Nemo Dahlén.
This is the second edition of Me Book of Writted Thinks. This edition is longer
than the first, but all of stories in the first edition are also in this one.
2017
T’once t’was a fellow with name Harold whom when the fancy struck him would telegraph everybody he know and invite them to his tinny flat house for coffin and cake.
When the invitationed peedles came they each askingly told Harold: ”Why oh why hath thou invitingly asked us to hither be gathered?” Harold then said he wasn’t quaint sure but felt it an peasant gesture all the same. However soon he noticed that less and less pebbles were going to his department for coughing and jake. After a few tims of this no one at all came anymore, not one. T’is made Harold who was a norman happy lad into a compressed persian who no more liked to invite people so he never saw anyone, he just stayed at home and did not even change out of his pajamas.
On one day his tellingphone ringed. It were his uncle whom was calling. Calling to hear how Harold was as he had not ivittied anydobby for a time. And after hearing out his grandson, the uncle asked politely if Howard wouldn’t like to come into his lard house for ccooffeess and cake. Harald said that he would. Upon standing at the door to his uncle’s palace he knicked upon it and entréd. Inside then was every single person Harold had ever invented to his parties and as he stood on the mat. ”Happy Birthday Harold!”, they all shouted at him, and he was. Yes that day he truly was a Happy Birthday Harold and they all desided that every time it was his birthday they would do it again.
How nice!
Happy Birthday Harold!
In a town known to most as Christopherobbingham there long ago resided a merry band of businessmen. But these were no ordinary businessmen, indeed no mere grocers or merchant bankers, for their trade was in pirating. Which is to mean that they went out souling on the squimping seals to serge fer treachery and boots.
The name of their litre was Edward John Richard XII. It had been decided that he would be captain since he had not only the most buckles on his boots but also the farthest beard, what could wretch down to the floor. The other membranes of their crew were a man with a woody knee called rather fittingly Kevin. There was as well one younger bloke whose neame was Roger but he was always called Tom because of the state of his marriage.
Those three brothers-in-trade had during a long period of thyme made themselves known as the most fearsome, ferocious and most well-spoked pirates in the land and on the water. As mentioned they had been operating for some time so I shall render here their most adventorous adventure (so that you will feel like you’re getting your money’s worth).
”By the archbishop of Westhamshire would I like to go on one treasure hunt” said one day Tom to the crew.
”Good news then” said Captain Edward John Richard XII, “for I just traded my parry for this treshymap and it has a big cross on it and all!”
”That’s no cross that there’s an ekss.” said Kevin who wasn’t near-sighted.
And he was of coarse correct, and so they sat snail!
Their shimp was quite a bit bigger than most fishy boats but it was nonetheless a fishy boat (but with sales off course) and atop the mast was a flag with a skull and cross-bows painted on it so that everyone new they were pirates. They soldered on for many a days eating naught but seacucumber buttys and drinking only starboard wine. Ones day though they herd Tom shouty from atop him shrilly voice:
”LAND OH BOY AND ALICE WELLES!!”
For it was.
