Scraping the Barrel E-Book

Cayn White

• Herausgeber: tredition
• Kategorie: Poesie und Drama
• Sprache: Englisch

Seitenzahl: 31

Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2020

Beschreibung

A collection of poems old and new from the fifteen year career of punk poet Cayn White. Featuring rants and poems focusing on a wide range of social subjects.

Leseprobe

Scraping the Barrel

Cayn White- 2020

Cayn White

Scraping The Barrel

Poems and Stupidity

Thanks, and ‘ow do to My Dad, Lorraine, Karl, Rory, Nan, Mum (r.i.p) and the rest of the White family, Jay, Kelly and little Alice Rose, Sara, Colm and Alice, Alice Harper, Keiron Higgins, Bernie the Bolt, Luke Hogarth, Jeff Dawson, Sarah and Neal, Geneviève Walsh All friends and performers who have giving me the kick up the arse and inspiration to write this, sorry it’s taken fifteen years, I’m a slow writer.

Apologies to anyone I’ve missed!

Cayn is a non-profit making poet, and he is pretty pissed off about it.

© 2020 Cayn White

Cover, Illustrations: Cayn White

Publisher: tredition GmbH, Halenreie 40-44, 22359

Hamburg, Germany

ISBN

Paperback:  978-3-347-18004-8

Hardcover:  978-3-347-18005-5

E-Book:      978-3-347-18006-2

Contents

The Biscuit Poem

Shit Joke in Poetry Form

Boring Poetry Night

The Obligatory Hate Poem

The Secret to a Happy and Stress-Free Life Mr

Negativity

Displacement Activity

Bob Ross

Crossroads

Christmas

The New Rock & Roll

Masks

Back to the Bottle

Where Ale is Sold

Too Far Out

The Bigger Picture

Man of the World

Microwave Man

The Comedian

It Can't Be Beat

Love Poems

Glimpse of God

Sticks and Stones

Best Years of their Lives

Sunday Best

Bad Jokes

Being Like You

Nine While Five

Brand Loyalty

The Voice

And The Laughter Stopped

Hello!

Thanks for buying/nicking this book, if you’re just stood in the bookshop thumbing through the pages, well, hello to you too.

What you have here is fifteen years’ worth of work, since 2005 I’ve been scribbling poems and performing at various punk rock gigs, poetry nights, festivals and the like and after fifteen years it finally seems time to collect some of them into a book, which you are now holding in your hot little hands.

There’s a good mix of both old and new in this collection, starting with the funnier stuff and moving into the more serious poems, hopefully there is something for everyone. Most of these poems are performance pieces, written to be shouted and screamed at the top of the lungs, give it a try, or even better come to the gigs!

Anyway, thank you for buying this collection, I hope you enjoy it as much as I’ve enjoyed the past fifteen years of writing and performing them.

See you at the gigs!

Cayn

Written about a slightly darker time in my life and exaggerated beyond belief, this is about how little niggles can become all-consuming and a welcome distraction from the world.

When Your Biscuit Falls Into Your Tea

It should never happen to anyone, let alone me

The day my biscuit fell into my tea

I couldn’t take it out and I had no access to a spoon

So I couldn’t fish it out, therefore it stayed marooned

At the bottom of my cup, destroying the taste

But I hated to see a good cuppa go to waste

So I necked the drink all in one

And I wretched and I gipped until the taste was gone

Shortly the vile after-taste went away

But that experience really ruined my day

Now I’ve had a load of things happen in my life

And I’ve had my fair share of trouble and strife

But one of the worst things that ever happened to me

Was when my biscuit fell into my tea

I’ve being mugged and threatened and mentally abused

I’ve fallen in love with people only to end up being

used

I’ve seen friends get buried and others locked up

But that doesn’t compare to the torment of dropping a

biscuit in my cup

I’ve drank so much that my liver couldn’t cope

I’ve been so ill that doctors gave up hope