Ten Things Your Student with Autism Wishes You Knew E-Book

Ellen Notbohm

• Herausgeber: Future Horizons
• Kategorie: Bildung
• Serie: Ten Things
• Sprache: Englisch

Seitenzahl: 197

Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2022

Beschreibung

Winner of the IPBA Gold Medal for Nonfiction Series (with Ten Things Every Child with Autism Wishes You Knew) and Winner of the Eric Hoffer Book Award for Reference/Education.

In this exciting companion to the beloved classic Ten Things Your Student with Autism Wishes You Knew, the unique perspective of an autistic child’s voice describes for teachers, in the classroom and in the larger community, how to understand thinking and processing patterns common in autism, how to shape an environment conducive to their learning style, and how to communicate with autistic learners of all ages in functional, meaningful ways.

It's the guidebook every educator and family member, worldwide, needs to create effective and inclusive settings where child and adult are both teachers and learners. This vibrantly updated and expanded edition includes an imaginative, all-new guide adaptable for group discussion, self-reflection, or self-expression, an afterword from the author’s autistic son, and added perspective from autistic adults about their experiences in education. Continuously in print for 16 years, and translated into multiple languages, Ten Things Your Student with Autism Wishes You Knew brings fresh perspective to a new generation of educators and autistic learners.

Leseprobe

Ten Things Your Student with Autism Wishes You Knew, Second Edition

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No part of this product may be reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission of Future Horizons, Inc, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in reviews.

ISBN: 9781949177862

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Praise forTen Things Your Student with Autism Wishes You Knew, Second Edition

The two biggest take-home messages from this book are the importance of parents and teachers working together as a team and understanding that your autistic child thinks differently. Ten Things Your Student with Autism Wishes You Knew will help parents and teachers learn more effective methods for teaching children on the spectrum.

— Temple Grandin, PhD, author of The Way I See It and Thinking in Pictures

*

It is a delight to find a book that creates a crack in the shell of autism, leading us to a better understanding of students with ASD. Ellen Notbohm offers us a glimpse of the inner thoughts of a child with this disorder, something that is often missed when teaching this student. A wonderful addition to any educator’s library!

— Sheila Wagner, M.Ed., author of the Inclusive Programming for Elementary, Middle School and High School Students with Autism book series

*

A breath of fresh air! Ellen Notbohm leaves behind reliance on tired, rigid systems of interventions and instead delves into vital transactional approaches that are so sorely needed.

The most important part of any IEP is not the diagnostic category but the individual’s student profile. This book makes that often-neglected section come alive. For it is only by seeing the unique beauty in each child that change can happen. There is no place for cookie cutter formulae or reliance on specific treatment modalities. Autistic students learn differently and must be taught differently. Again, the book shows us how.

Further, when insisting that only the child should “change” in order to learn, we omit an essential ingredient. That is the role of the teacher in being able to change, innovate and accommodate in a transactional fashion. Hooray for circular learning!

Once we truly see each student with fresh eyes, understanding that their behaviors always have communicative intent, that kids do well if they can, that trust curiosity and respect are key, then we can break old, tired molds and instead allow the child’s innate individuality to shine forth and succeed.

An essential book for any parent, educator, and developmental pediatrician!

— Raun D. Melmed, MD, FAAP, director of the Melmed Center and co-founder and medical director of the Southwest Autism Research and Resource Center, Phoenix AZ, PhD, LCSW and author of Autism: Early Intervention, Autism and the Extended Family, Autism Parent Handbook: Beginning with the End Goal in Mind, and the ST4 Mindfulness Book for Kids series

*

In a sequel to her groundbreaking best-seller Ten Things Every Child with Autism Wishes You Knew , Ellen Notbohm brings the same intelligence, humanity, and compassionate clarity to educators that her earlier volume brought to parents. There are gems on every page, an impeccable blend of wisdom and heart.

Ten Things Your Student with Autism Wishes You Knew is an important book for adults who want to do right by the children entrusted to their care. In fact, Notbohm’s framework of mutuality, attention, curiosity, and wholeness is something that will benefit all children who are struggling to be known and understood—to connect, feel that they matter, and find where they belong.

A brilliant volume that’s sure to be another perennial best-seller, Notbohm’s thoughtful and actionable must-have handbook is sure to expand the number of parents, teachers, and counselors who count on her work to guide them.

— Barbara Probst, PhD, LCSW and author of When Labels Don’t Fit

*

It’s always a joy and an education to read Ellen Notbohm’s books, and her second edition of Ten Things Your Student with Autism Wishes You Knew is no exception. I love the book’s underlying and over-arching themes of optimism, respect for differences, and belief in our students. We are reminded and encouraged to be curious about their unique learning styles, to foster their own curiosity as an important learning tool, and to learn from our students, so we can teach them in the ways they learn best. Most importantly, she shines a light on the joy that is an integral part of knowing and teaching these students. Ellen includes personal experiences, insights from teachers and other professionals, and authentic lived-experience viewpoint from autistic author Jennifer M cIlwee Myers. The questions and prompts for discussion, self-reflection, or self-expression would be perfect for a teachers’ book club, school autism training, or personal independent study. Although written with students on the autism spectrum in mind and heart, each of these Ten Things would be important for all students. There is just so much to love in this book!

— Wendela Whitcomb Marsh, MA, BCBA, RSD, author of Recognizing Autism in Girls and Women, Independent Living with Autism: Your Roadmap to Success, and Autism Parent Handbook with Raun Melmed, MD, FAAP

*

If you only read one book about autism, let this be the one. And prepare for emotional impact. Once again, drawing on firsthand experience and literature, Notbohm shares her gift of shining light, optimism, and profound wisdom in a conversational style that is both scholarly and uplifting. Notbohm never minces words about an obvious, vital truth—in order to help students reach their full potential, we must first understand the world as they experience it. With humor and heart, Notbohm offers clear insights and immediate strategies to help educators, parents, and other helpers to do just that. First, and foremost, Notbohm understands the power of the child’s perspective by showing us how to improve the way we listen, how to better demonstrate respect, and develop trust to believe what we are being told. An absorbing, enormously instructive book that I couldn’t put down.

— Debra Whiting Alexander, PhD, LMFT, post-trauma treatment specialist, Former Associate Professor of Psychology and School Counseling, Bushnell University, and former Adjunct Professor of Psychology at Oregon State University. Author of Children Changed by Trauma and A River for Gemma

*

Ten Things Your Student with Autism Wishes You Knew combines wisdom from a student with autism, his family, and his educators throughout the continuum of their school years from pre-school to higher education, delivered through analogies, metaphors, and hard facts. It is written with humor and easy-to-remember phrases so the reader can learn to hear the voices of our autistic students and respond in ways that are meaningful to them. The book starts with clear succinct points that lay out a guide map, then clarifies the essential information to help teachers offer their best work for their students’ growth. Through numerous and invaluable examples, Ten Things provides insight that can be used to generalize an understanding of the VERY different way the brain of a person with autism is wired.

The Ten Things laid out in this book are critical to teaching students with ASD. But you’ll find much that benefits all children as well. Recalling my own 40-year career as a teacher, a learning specialist, and a district supervisor of special education teachers, I highly recommend Ten Things Your Student with Autism Wishes You Knew for your educational resource library.

— Eileen Harrison Sanchez, MEd, LDTC, NCED-R, PreK-12 Special Education Supervisor (retired), Princeton Public Schools, New Jersey, and author of Freedom Lessons

*

Ellen Notbohm has done it again! Every educator should own and frequently refer to this book. Every parent of a child with autism should give a copy of this book to each of their student’s teachers. The communication strategies in Chapter 2 can be life-changing not only for a child, but also for the adults in that child’s life. As both a parent and an educator, I recommend this book for the impact it can have not only on a child’s school year, but also on their life.

— Bobbi Reilly Sheahan, substitute teacher, homeschool teacher, and author of What I Wish I’d Known About Raising a Child With Autism

*

Ten Things Your Student with Autism Wishes You Knew is an essential guidebook for anyone who loves, works with, and advocates for children.

One of the biggest challenges for students with different learning needs is when those who are supposed to be supporting them do not understand how their minds and bodies interact with others and their world. Understanding how the individual on the autism spectrum connects with the world and being willing to accommodate a way of interacting that differs from your own is vital to building the foundation for positive relationships,

instruction, advocacy, and equity. This book is an in-depth primer to understanding the most prominent common threads that run through the autism community.

Ellen Notbohm’s advocacy is informed by experience, research, empathy and a passion for making the lives of spectrum individuals and those who interact with them more fulfilling. This book provides clear and specific guidance that is doable, logical, meaningful and relevant. It should be required reading for all child centered professionals.

— Kassie Evans Halpin, M.Ed, Special Educator, Service Learning Coordinator, Advocate for Educational Diversity, Equity, Inclusion, and Individualized Support

Also by Ellen Notbohm

Nonfiction

Ten Things Every Child with Autism Wishes You Knew, Third Edition

1001 Great Ideas for Teaching and Raising Children with Autism or Asperger’s, Second Edition with co-author Veronica Zysk

The Autism Trail Guide: Postcards from the Road Less Traveled

Fiction

The River by Starlight

For Connor and Bryce

... as if my books could be anything but

Contents

Preface

Before we begin

Here are ten things your student with autism wishes you knew

Chapter One: Learning Is Circular

Chapter Two: We’re a Team

Chapter Three: I Think Differently

Chapter Four: Behavior Is Communication: Yours, Mine, and Ours

Chapter Five: Glitched, Garbled, and Bewildered

Chapter Six: Teach the Whole Me

Chapter Seven: Be Curious

Chapter Eight: Can I Trust You?

Chapter Nine: Believe

Chapter Ten: Teach Me “How to Fish”

Continuance

Questions and prompts for discussion, self-reflection, or self-expression

Acknowledgments

About the Author

A note on language usage in this book

Vocabulary and language usage among both autistic and non- autistic people have evolved over the last several decades, and it will continue evolving to reflect growing knowledge, differences in cultures, and individual preferences. No single format can represent all.

This book uses the terms autistic, with autism, with ASD (autism spectrum disorder), and on the spectrum interchangeably.

This book recognizes all gender preferences. He/him, she/her, and the singular they/them are used interchangeably.

Preface

In the spring of 2004, I wrote a short piece called “Ten Things Every Child with Autism Wishes You Knew.” I did it on a semi-dare. While gathering ideas for our book 1001 Great Ideas for Teaching and Raising Children with Autism or Asperger’s , my co-author and editor Veronica Zysk sent me a wish list article written by a mother to a teacher. I’d seen other such articles, and I’d seen articles written from a teacher’s point of view, but I had never seen anything that portrayed an autistic child’s point of view. “But who speaks for the child?” I commented to Veronica.

“You do,” came the reply. “Write that piece.”

The words that brought those original ten things to life flowed out of me freely, as if coming from some natural part of the landscape. Never could I have imagined the response. It traveled the internet like brush fire and hit print in dozens of publications on every continent (okay, not Antarctica). Within the year, a book based on the article followed, and it too brought new friends to me from around the world.

When I started getting requests for more articles of a similar nature, I had to ponder what it was about Ten Things that resonated so deeply among such a diverse group of people. It seemed to erase all borders—gender, cultural, racial, political, religious, economic. Readers made it clear that the resonance came from the fact that it spoke with a child’s voice, a voice not heard often enough and, in many cultures and communities, not at all. For those voices to go unheeded is sad and wrong but not surprising when one of the hallmarks of autism is its veritable steeplechase of obstacles to effective communication.

There was, and still is, great need and ever-increasing willingness to understand the world as autistic children experience it. So the voice of our child returned in a second article, “Ten Things Your Student with Autism Wishes You Knew,” to tell us what children on the autism spectrum wish their teachers knew. It too became a torch passed from reader to reader around the world. It was only a matter of time until my publisher and editor both suggested—firmly—that this book was a next step both natural and necessary. At the same time, teachers from preschool through university contacted me, wanting to use my work as training materials for family members, caregivers, administrators, and staff. The child’s voice provided a compelling starting point for easing a general population into the shift in thinking that is necessary if we’re to succeed in reaching and teaching our autistic children.

I would have to teach things I didn’t know yet, and in a manner that wasn’t the slightest bit familiar to me. I would have to be learner first, before I could be a teacher.

This book happened for two over- arching reasons. The first is that, from the moment I heard the word “autism” applied to my son Bryce, I was determined to play the hand our family had been dealt without bitterness and without blame in as constructive, positive, and healthy a manner as we could. The second reason is that, although I had already (obviously) signed on for my role as a parent, I realized quickly that I would need to wear a teacher’s hat for far more than table manners and tying shoelaces. I would have to teach things I didn’t know yet, and I would have to teach them in a manner that wasn’t the slightest bit familiar to me. In other words, I would have to be a learner first before I could be a teacher.

This is the dangerous juncture at which, whether teacher means educator or parent/caregiver, it’s easy to become overwhelmed.

There’s so much about autism we don’t know or understand! There’s so much this child needs to learn! There are only six hours in the school day! There are only 175 days in a school year! There are only fifteen (or less!) years left until he’s an adult! Yes, I needed to become a learner first, but the first thing I needed to learn was how to pace myself and pace the journey. I couldn’t and didn’t need to know everything up front. I could and would learn as we went along. I only needed to know enough to stay one step ahead of my son, within beckoning distance. And when even that modest pace wasn’t possible, I became comfortable learning alongside him, the same things at the same time, which had its own kind of lovely power. Equally important was learning that I couldn’t go this alone—and that I wouldn’t have to. Although Bryce would be my primary teacher, all sorts of others, children and adults, would have a hand in teaching me as well.

What is it about any teacher that incites learning, makes us curious about our world? Aren’t we all more open to learning when we trust the messenger and feel that both our efforts and our personal way of thinking and doing are respected? If we feel validated by our teachers as individual selves, we’re more willing to take the risks necessary to learning. Don’t we all respond more eagerly to those who actively believe in us—as opposed to those who communicate impatience, indifference, doubt, or resignation?

It’s not often easy, but it works. And it worked for my son because he—and my whole family—had the immeasurable advantage of learning from immensely talented and caring teachers every step of the way. But I can’t emphasize this more strongly: we weren’t “lucky.” I looked at dozens of schools within the twenty-five-mile radius surrounding our home until I found the one that stood out as being the right fit for both our sons (the older having been diagnosed with ADHD). We took rigorous steps to get them into that school. What those steps were isn’t as important as the fact that we were willing to do whatever it took (to the extent our personal conditions allowed), because the culture of the teaching community at that school was what our sons needed to succeed. What I learned alongside the many dedicated teachers who’ve worked with Bryce was the impetus for this book. Their voices ring throughout, whether identified or not.

My search for the right school narrowed down to The One as I interviewed the last of the neighborhood parents and professionals on my list. Eerily, I’d been hearing the same remark over and over: “Oh yes, it’s a wonderful school. But whatever you do, when you get to third grade, make sure you get Jackie, the teacher to end all teachers!” I found out that Jackie Druck had this reputation going back several decades. When Bryce did get assigned to Jackie for third grade, I spent as much time in the classroom as he would allow (respecting that this was his world and he didn’t want me there more than occasionally, a fully understandable piece of his growing independence). And in my time spent in Jackie’s classroom, I became enormously baffled. For such a grandiose reputation, she was a low-key, unassuming person. Her classroom was calm and orderly, the peaceful, fluid music of Enya often playing softly. I could not for the life of me put my finger on any specific thing she was doing that kept two generations of kids, including Bryce, so spellbound.

And yet.

When the kids wrote their year-end essays highlighting their favorite parts of third grade, it was clear that most, if not all, were simply in love with her. When she retired shortly thereafter, the party had to be held in a city park to accommodate all who wanted to come.

I had to mull over all this with my old college girlfriend Shirley, a nationally board-certified teacher. Shirley and Jackie had never had any kind of contact, and yet Shirley didn’t hesitate to answer my question. “I can tell you what it is,” she said. “I’d be willing to bet she has a deep, inherent respect for each child and that she communicates that to them. Children are willing to do quite a bit for teachers who first and foremost respect them as individuals.”

Two telling exchanges unfolded at the beginning of our year in Jackie’s classroom. At our first meeting, she told me she was excited to work with Bryce. She said she’d taught only one other student with autism a few years earlier, and he’d been quite different from Bryce. I had to smile a little as I gently told her that if she’d been teaching for thirty-five years, she’d had far more than one. But she may not have known what she was looking at. Sure enough, a few weeks later I got a call. “You’re right,” she said. “I’ve had dozens of them. How much more I could have done if I had known. ”

Jackie’s willingness to be a lifelong learner, her curiosity, her respect for all manner of learners was indeed the key to her success. At parent conferences two months into the school year, she greeted me with, “I’m going to have to keep him for a couple of years.”

I was stunned. I had thought things were going so well. “Is he doing that poorly?” I asked.

“No, silly,” she said. “I’m just that intrigued by him. There’s so much more I need to learn about him. From him.”

Before we begin

While this book contains some specific suggestions for the classroom, its primary purpose is to fold those kinds of ideas into the larger concepts that, hopefully, govern the teacher in all of us, whether trained educator, support staff, parent, therapist, administrator, family member—or Quidditch coach! If you’re familiar with the Harry Potter saga, I’m sure you noticed that the Quidditch teams have no adult coaches. They’re completely student-led units, left to win or lose on their own experiences, knowledge, and ability to work as a team, with no adult guidance. Perhaps that’s why they call it magic?

Strategies and tactics are vital and necessary, the nuts and bolts of the educational quest. But we want to go beyond that, to consider how smoothly the whole locomotive will chug after all the bolts are in place, after adding the correct formulation of fuel that will enable it to move. A former in-law of mine headed up the aircraft maintenance operation at a military base. He summed up this critical job as “tightening up the loose stuff and loosening up the tight stuff.” And so it is with fine-tuning a whole child to their highest potential. Their future success is predicated on much more than any facts we attempt to teach them.

To be able to hear the voices of our autistic students and respond in ways that are meaningful to them, we must be able to step outside our own deeply ingrained perspectives and frame of reference. Most of us think in words, while this child may think in pictures. We embrace the nuances of language, while they need concrete explanations. While we infer context and motivation from our observations of others, they may be “mindblind” to such social subtleties. What smells good to us makes an autistic child nauseous. Sounds that we routinely filter out make their heads pound. Some adults doggedly insist the autistic child is “off in their own little world” and must “join the real world,” but we must start with accepting and acting from an understanding that the child’s own world is as real to them as ours is to us. We encourage and motivate our child to join a larger world, not through insults, shaming, and narrow perspectives, but by giving them goals that are clear, relevant, incremental, developmentally appropriate, and attainable, and then giving them the tools, problem-solving strategies, and emotional support to achieve those goals. We teach them how to reach for realistic achievements and qualities, and we adjust the goals to reflect their progress and the constant change around them. That’s the real real world we should want for them.

Nearly every teacher with whom I’ve spent time tells me that real-world magic lies in “seeing the light bulb go on” with any child. If you can’t find the switch, the groping can get frustrating. My hope is that this book will guide your hand to that switch. It’s at the same time easier than you think and more challenging than you think.