The Buzz E-Book

David Hodgson

• Herausgeber: Crown House Publishing
• Kategorie: Ratgeber
• Sprache: Englisch

Seitenzahl: 209

Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2015

Beschreibung

If you are considering higher education or wondering what future career would suit you The Buzz is packed with techniques and advice to point you in the right direction. By blending NLP and personality type theory, David Hodgson helps people understand themselves, how they learn and what motivates them in order to discover their potential and what they really want from life. The brain is an amazing thing. It is the most complicated known thing in the universe. Sometimes it helps make us believe we can do amazing things - great inventions, acts of incredible bravery - when we are at our best. It is better to understand how our brain works and control it for the life we really want, rather than stick to habits that hinder us. Most people use about 10 per cent of their potential. With The Buzz, you can access the other 90 per cent. How much of it do you dare use? The Buzz has been developed with and used by thousands of young people. It works. They have been surprised at how easy it can be to start living a great life, discover new strengths and skills, dream dreams, plan to make them happen and enjoy feeling great while moving in a positive direction that feels right. We can build a great life around our strengths, the things we enjoy and are good at. The Buzz also shows us simple ways in which we can alter our behaviour to succeed in the different situations and challenges we face. Young people consistently say they want the same three things from life; to be happy, confident and successful. The Buzz shows everyone how to achieve all of these through a fantastic and illuminating journey of self-discovery. Complex theories and approaches are clearly presented in an easy to understand form. David Hodgson presents a unique and highly effective method of realising potential and making the best choices for you. Advice includes tips on: how to get out of an argument, choosing presents for people, the power of laughter, talking to people you fancy, improving your sports performance, how to relax and reduce stress, building self-esteem, employability skills, learning and thinking better, choosing a course or career and understanding your personality.

Leseprobe

For Cathy, Daniel and Lucy.

CONTENTS

Introduction

Andy Murray, Darth Vader and Shrek

Great inventors and farts

Mind magic

Brain power

Start now

Section One - Make Your Personality Buzz

Be a superhero

Personality direction

Personality buzzwords

Preferences

E or I

S or N

F or T

J or P

Plus or Minus

The fifth chunk of personality

Putting your preferences together

ISTJ: Polar bear

ISFJ: Koala bear

ISTP: Tiger

ISFP: Cat

INFJ: Sea horse

INFP: Seal

INTP: Tawny owl

INTJ: Barn owl

ESTJ: Black bear

ESFJ: Teddy bear

ESTP: Panther

ESFP: Lion

ENFJ: Dolphin

ENFP: Clown fish

ENTP: Falcon

ENTJ: Eagle

Famous types

Percentages of each type in the UK

Learning and thinking better

How to get out of an argument

Choosing a course or career

Top ten employability skills

Type: strengths and stress

Buying a present for someone

How do you get on with your parents?

Post-Traumatic Growth

Section Two - Make Your Behaviour Buzz

Milk rage

Moods

Angry

Relaxed

Bored

Go for it/Buzzing

Nervous

Curious

Sad

Happy

Be a mind reader

Five steps to mood control

Anchors

Mood control

A negative direction: mood hoovers!

A positive direction: mood movers and groovers

Laughter: the shortest distance between two people

Moving in a positive direction

Sea squirts

Do we wheelie do this?

A stinky but

Darren’s story

Try this out

57 channels and there’s nothing on

The bottom line

Finding our natural mood

Do you need to ask for directions?

I can canoe, can you?

In which direction do you face minus?

In which direction do you face plus?

Catchphrases as a way to influence our mood

Life is not a game of cards

The best of E

The best of I

The best of S and N

The best of N

The best of S

The best of F and T

The best of J and P

The best of - (negative)

The best of + (positive)

‘The buzz’

Section Three - Go For It

Potty advice

Buzzing in action

I really fancy you

Be your best at sport

Talking in front of groups

Learning more

Relax and remove stress

Self-esteem builder

Laughter versus stress

A visit to the cinema

A whole world in your hands

A change for the best

Appendix

The theory behind The Buzz

The big five factors

NLP in a nutshell

Anchoring

Comparison of type and NLP interventions

Bibliography

Index

Acknowledgements

Advice for teens and dedicated website

Introduction

John is an experienced skydiver. Eighteen months ago he jumped out of a plane. It was a beautiful sunny day.

He pulled the cord to release his parachute and it didn’t work. ‘Not to worry,’ he thought, ‘I’ll pull the cord for my spare’. It didn’t work. It is very rare for both parachutes to fail. The result is usually death, painful but quick. John thought he had about thirty seconds left of life. His final thought would be, ‘I wish I’d done more with my life.’ This is common.

Luckily, John landed in soft snow and survived. This is rare. He spent a year in hospital recovering from his injuries. He then saw me, a careers adviser, because he wanted to make something of himself, to use his potential, not waste his life. John said that as he fell, certain he would die, he marked his life on a scale of 0 to 10. He was disappointed because he gave himself a 6. He wished he’d done more with the skills and strengths he has.

If you were to mark your life out of 10, what score would you give yourself?

A 10 means you’ve fully used all the potential, opportunities and skills you have. Zero means you’ve completely wasted your life so far. John was one of the first to use The Buzz to help him achieve his best. Since John, thousands of others have joined him.

10: I’ve fully lived my life to my true potential.

8–9: I’ve mostly made the most of my skills and strengths.

6–7: I’m doing OK, but …

3–5: I’ve probably wasted a lot of the opportunities I’ve had.

0–2: Oh, dear!

John gives two bits of advice to people – use The Buzz, and check your parachutes carefully before you jump.

What score would you like?

Like John, use The Buzz to take your score as high as you dare!

Andy Murray, Darth Vader and Shrek

The Buzz will help you be your best – it’s easier than you think. I asked about a hundred teenagers, ‘What do you want from your life?’

They all said, basically, the same three things: to be happy, confident and feel I did my best. With The Buzz you can have all three.

Most life stories follow the same pattern.

In Shrek, the hero finds out who he is: an ogre with a heart forced to live alone because others judge him by how he looks. He then finds out what he wants from life – Fiona – and finally he goes for it. These three steps are the same for Darth Vader in Star Wars, David and Victoria Beckham, Andy Murray and all of us.

▪ Step One: Finding out who we are.

▪ Step Two: Finding out what makes us buzz.

▪ Step Three: Deciding to go for it.

The Buzz is in three sections to help you address these areas in your life:

Section One: Make Your Personality Buzz

Discover

your personality preferences;what you’re naturally good at – with career ideas; how to get on better with friends and family.

Section Two: Make Your Behaviour Buzz

Discover

how we ‘do’ moods;positive and negative directions, mood control; the best of all ten personality strengths.

Section Three: Go For It

Discover

seven ways to really buzz;more confidence and less stress; how to be your best.

Great inventors and farts

Our brain is an amazing thing. It is the most complicated known thing in the universe.

Sometimes it helps make us believe we can do amazing things – great inventions, acts of incredible bravery – when we are at our best. Then sometimes we do daft things such as touching wet paint to check it’s wet because we can’t believe the sign, or lighting farts. Two people die each year from lighting their own farts. What a sad (and painful!) way to die. Sometimes we move in a negative direction and are not our best!

It is better to understand how our brain works and control it for the life we really want, rather than stick to habits that hinder us. Most people use about 10 per cent of their potential.

With The Buzz, you can access the other 90 per cent. How much of it do you dare use?

Question:

Are there more neuron cells in your brain or people on earth?

Answer:

at the bottom of Page ix.

Mind magic

Some scientists once proved that bumblebees couldn’t fly. Their wings just weren’t strong enough to lift their bodies. Nobody told the bumblebees! The bee’s brain believes it can fly, so it flaps its wings until it does, and they can fly at over 48 kilometres (30 miles) per hour. We are the same: we have more potential than we realise. We can use our own brains to believe things that move us in a positive direction and remove beliefs that take us in a negative direction.

Our brains make many assumptions for us. Can you see the white triangle? Most people can, even though it isn’t there.

Brain power

Our brain receives more than 2 million pieces of information every second, so it simplifies things for us all of the time. Our brains make us believe things: some good, some bad, some useful and some useless. Once we recognise this, we can control our brains to become happier and more confident, and be our best.

The Buzz has been developed with and used by thousands of young people. It works. Try it. Enjoy it. Let it help you be your best. Millions of adults wait until they’re old before they go for it (some never do).

Remember the tingle of excitement we get as young children on Christmas morning, or birthdays, seeing the presents in front of us, wondering what is there, knowing there will be some surprises? This buzz is something people have all the time when they are happy, confident and at their best.

Start now

The best comments I receive from young people using The Buzz are about their surprise at how easy it can be to start living a great life, discovering new strengths and skills, dreaming dreams, planning to make them happen and enjoying feeling great while moving in a positive direction that feels right.

We can build a great life around our strengths, the things we enjoy and are good at.

The Buzz also shows us simple ways in which we can alter our behaviour to succeed in the different situations and challenges we face.

Enjoy finding out about yourself and others.

Warning!

▪ The learning is in the doing.

▪ We remember 90 per cent of what we say and do.

▪ We remember only 10 per cent of what we read.

So don’t just read The Buzz: do it! There are games to play throughout The Buzz. They are clearly marked.

For best results, read through the whole book – slowly. Take your time, like a group of twelve-year-olds at McDonald’s who can make a small milkshake last for three hours on a Saturday afternoon. Slurp on!

If at any time you get bored, just add your favourite rude words to some of the sentences. This technique has helped my children through many a dull reading book from arse school. Did you spot that one?

Answer to question on Page vii: There are far more neuron cells in your brain (more than 100 billion) than people on Earth (7 billion).

Section One

Make Your Personality Buzz

Section One

Make Your Personality Buzz

What kind of personality do you have?

In this section, we’ll explore type theory to help uncover some of your natural strengths.

Be a superhero

If you could be a superhero, what would your special power be?

Invisible? Amazingly strong?

Think of what you’re good at now and exaggerate these qualities.

When I was young, I was cute and quiet. So perhaps my superhero qualities would be Mr Shh (so quiet that he could be invisible) or Mr Ah (so cute that evil villains would trust him, allowing him to foil their dastardly plans).

So who could you be?

Most people struggle to say what they’re good at because they are either too modest or they really don’t know.

Can you choose three positive words that sum up your personality?

Which of the words under ‘Personality buzzwords’ on Page 4 best describe you? Will they match those in your personality profile?

Personality direction

Which way are you facing?

Many studies have revealed five big chunks of personality. For each of these, we can face one way or the other. We can breathe in or breathe out. Both part of the same thing but opposite directions. In personality, we can point each way: sometimes we’re quiet; at other times we may be very chatty. But mostly we face one way – our preference. When we have a choice of doing something two ways, we always seem to pick one and stick with it. This is why, when we put our pants on in the morning, we always put the same leg in first! Adding up our preferences can reveal a lot about our personality and behaviour. We can also explore ways to develop and use the best of all ten. Most people use five out of the ten. With The Buzz, you can go for ten out of ten.

Ask a friend if they agree. What will they like best about you?

Next, look at the five chunks of personality from Pages 12 to 28.

Remember, there are no right or wrong answers. Just choose your preference.

Personality buzzwords

Tick the words that match your personality. Ask a friend if they agree. What will they like best about you?

Achiever

Someone who gets things done even when things get tough.

Analytical

Works things out carefully, paying attention to detail and facts.

Caring

Will look after other people or animals.

Determined

Stick up for themselves, their friends and their beliefs until things are sorted out.

Enthusiastic

Get excited about things and get other people excited too.

Flexible

Willing to try new things and not scared to learn from experience.

Friendly

Make other people feel good and relaxed.

Funny

A good sense of humour, fun to be with.

Generous

Share their time, money and thoughts without expecting something in return.

Imaginative

Come up with good ideas and new ways to do things.

Independent

Make decisions on their own, don’t just follow the crowd.

Organised

Plan their time carefully so they can get more done and worry less.

Loyal

Stay friends through good times and bad.

Modest

Doesn’t show off or brag about their successes.

Practical

Get things done, don’t just talk about it.

Reliable

Do what they say they will; someone you can trust.

Tip:

These can be great words to use in your CV.

Can you guess which one of these famous people has the same personality as you?

Victoria Beckham

When she was younger, she is said to have stated that her ambition was to become a brand as famous as Nike or Daz. She has certainly achieved this goal by using her knowledge of how the media and business work to full effect. She is determined, confident and hardworking to make the most of her talents. An achiever who gets things done. Do you share these qualities?

David Beckham

Famous footballer and former England captain who is naturally talented but is also prepared to practise long hours to be the best footballer he can be. Quiet, friendly, down-to-earth, organised, determined, reliable, caring and hardworking. Do you share these qualities?

Bridget Jones

Famous from the Bridget Jones’s Diary book and film series. Usually says what she’s thinking; resulting in embarrassment. She gets away with it because she is fun-loving, enthusiastic, generous and caring. A bit disorganised, but her heart is in the right place. Do you share these qualities?

JK Rowling

She used her vivid imagination to create a rich array of characters and plot twists in her series of Harry Potter novels. Many people use their creativity to become successful. Do you share this quality?

Will Smith

The talented actor and musician has combined his energy, creativity, warmth, generosity and hardworking approach to remain successful throughout his life. Do you share these qualities?

Richard Branson

One of the most famous and successful British entrepreneurs around. Sociable, visionary, objective and decisive. He is happy to learn from his mistakes, though his analytical mind ensures many a success. Has a go for it/let’s-do-it attitude that spreads to those around him. Do you share these qualities?

Bob Geldof

In-your-face musician and campaigner. Will generally say what he believes is true even if it upsets some people. Uses determination, creativity and oral skills to seek out solutions to complex problems. An independent, flexible and analytical mind. Do you share these qualities?

Anne Frank

The bravery and determination demonstrated as she hid from the Nazis has inspired generations. Days before she died she said, ‘It’s a wonder I haven’t abandoned all my ideals, they seem so absurd and impractical. Yet I cling to them because I still believe, in spite of everything, that people are truly good at heart.’ Do you share these qualities?

Gary Lineker

Mr nice guy. The only professional footballer never to be booked. Popular, friendly, reliable, practical and organised. Likes others to be the same. Usually looks for the best in people. This type of personality tends to be happiest when providing for people, friends or family. Do you share these qualities?

Jeremy Clarkson

TV presenter, writer and lover of fast machines. Will generally offer his opinion even if it is not a popular one! Often has funny and original ideas. Assertive, adventurous, fearless, independent and busy. Do you share these qualities?

Delia Smith

One of the first celebrity chefs and still selling cookbooks by the millions. Also, chair of Norwich City Football Club. Personality strengths include being responsible, focused, quietly determined, realistic, practical, objective, organised and a careful planner. Do you share these qualities?

Shrek

Computer–generated hero of the films named after him. Remember, sharing his personality does not mean you look like him! He is quiet, determined, independent, adaptable and practical, and enjoys his own space and company. Will stand up for what he believes in. Do you share these qualities?

Cinderella

Fairy-tale character with an interesting personality. Quiet, imaginative, caring, devoted and hardworking. Qualities that were exploited by her stepmother and sisters, but ultimately helped her find her true love. Let’s hope he treated her a bit better once they were married! Anyway, do you share these qualities?

Lady Gaga

The controversial singer is as effective at self-promotion as she is at selling records. Some people enjoy creating and playing characters in their work. Her commitment to her fans and her willingness to take risks is also fundamental to her success. Do you share these qualities?

Jodie Foster

Actress famous for her attention to detail, determination and immersing herself fully into her work, as revealed in the following quote: ‘I always play strong women […] I’m not sure I know how to play weak.’ Do you share these qualities?

Albert Einstein

Classic mad-professor type of personality! Independent, curious, imaginative, analytical, problem solver. Can ‘live in his own head’, so absorbed in thinking through problems and puzzles to be solved. Interested in inventing or creating new solutions. Do you share these qualities?

Were you right? Work out your own personality using Pages 12–28, then read your description, see Page 29.

Preferences – what are yours?

Try folding your arms both ways. Now sign your name, first with your preferred hand, then with the other hand. How did it feel?

Preferred way

Other way

easy

natural

comfortable

without thinking

cool

hard

had to think

uncomfortable

really concentrating

rock hard

Some researchers think that cats and dogs are either left-handed or right-handed, but all polar bears are left-handed!

Sign your name on a piece of paper with your left hand

Sign your name on a piece of paper with your right hand

Who are you more like?

Eddy

I think out loudI prefer variety and actionI like to act quicklyI’m a good talkerI like to give my opinion

Ian

I think before I speakI prefer quietI like to be carefulI’m a good listenerI keep my thoughts to myself

Remember, both are good. Which is the real you?

So what is your preference: E or I?

The difference between E and I preferences is usually the easiest to spot.

E preferences like to talk, discuss, think out loud (they often put their foot in it with their mouth); they tend to flit around from topic to topic while chatting (often not sticking to the point – ‘What was I saying?’ they may say halfway through a ramble! They are usually people you know a lot about, their favourite film, TV show, food and hobbies, because they tend to talk.

E preferences are more likely to talk to the TV, and perhaps even argue with it! They are also more likely to liven up emails with CAPITAL LETTERS and exclamation marks!!! than I preferences.

I preferences tend to think before they speak. They mull it over and give you their considered opinion; they tend to avoid waffle; they are often private and you may not know a lot about them because they tend to give their opinion only when asked for it.

An E generally likes to talk about things whereas an I doesn’t need to.

While delivering a two-day course that ran on a Friday and the following Monday, I gave the group homework that required them to behave in the opposite way to their preference at some point over the weekend. On Monday, Emma asked if she could share what had happened to her. She said she has an E preference and her three friends (whom she had been going out with most Friday nights for the past ten years) have I preferences.

This Friday, she decided to be quiet and listen rather than do all of the talking. Can you guess what happened? After just a couple of minutes, one of her friends asked if she was OK. She said she was fine and stayed quiet. After two more minutes, all of her friends said they would not say anything more until she told them what was wrong. She told them about her homework. She said she’d found out stuff about her friends she didn’t know just by listening for a change, which she thought was amazing, as she’d known them for ten years. Her story also shows how we tend to stay in our preferred letter because people think there’s something wrong with us when we’re different.

An I preference also tried the homework. At a party, he thought he would talk to all ten people in the room before he left. Normally, he’d have spoken to just one person if possible, even after a few pints. He said it was scary and tiring but very exciting. His topic of conversation was the course he was doing and his homework. He found everyone was interested. You could try this – keep The Buzz with you and you can help other people discover their personality preferences.

Getting on better with people

Tips to try out

E/I behaviour is how we interact with the world, our direction of attention – outward (to people or things) or inward (to our own thoughts, feelings). To communicate effectively we need to use the best of both.

E’s, you should learn to listen. Do not dominate a conversation. Encourage others to speak and describe their ideas. Don’t interrupt or finish people’s sentences! Count to five in your head before speaking. It will be tough but I’s will be impressed by your listening skills. Learn to put your ideas down in writing. This will help clarify your ideas and appeal to I’s. As Stephen Covey once said, first seek to understand, then to be understood.

I’s, your written thoughts are usually well thought out and clear. When talking, don’t stop when you’re interrupted, but politely ask if you can finish your point and say you’ll then listen to the other person (it’s usually an E who interrupts!). I’s can help E’s by returning them to the point and by not getting annoyed with their ‘thinking out loud’.

David and Victoria Beckham on a chat show

Soon after moving to Madrid, Victoria and David Beckham were interviewed on a chat show.

The interviewer turned to David and asked if he’d settled in at Real Madrid.

David, an I preference, started to think about the question and go inside himself to think about an answer. As he was preparing an answer, Victoria, an E, leaned over and said, ‘He’s settled in very well. Thanks for asking.’ Listen out in conversations and see if you can spot this E and I difference.

Who are you more like?

Sharon

I look for the factsI look for detailsI focus on what works nowI prefer using what I’ve learnedI’m more practical and sensible

Naz

I look for the possibilitiesI like to work out what it meansI focus on how to make it differentI prefer learning new skillsI’m more of a dreamer and imaginative

Remember, both are good. Which is the real you?

So what is your preference: S or N?

Which behaviour are you more comfortable using? S preference is about gathering information by looking for detail. Asking, ‘What have we got here?’ S is generally about being practical, sensible and realistic, knowing what needs to be done, living in the ‘present’, the real world.

N preference is about exploring beyond the information given, perhaps searching for deeper meaning. Asking, ‘How can we change this? What does this mean?’ N is generally about being imaginative and creative with ideas, living in the ‘future’. Both ways of gathering information about the world are useful.

Child’s play

From an early age, both my children clearly displayed their S and N preferences.

My daughter has an S preference. When playing, she liked to know what she was supposed to do, how it worked, so she could follow the ‘rules’ of a jigsaw, train or tea set. Teachers tend to like S-preference children who seek to know what the rules are (especially if they then apply the rules J rather than question and challenge N or P, but we’ll get to that later).

We were watching Teletubbies