The Mindfulness and Character Strengths Workbook E-Book

Ryan M Niemiec

• Herausgeber: Hogrefe Publishing
• Kategorie: Ratgeber
• Sprache: Englisch
• Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2023

Seitenzahl: 238

Beschreibung

Do we really have all we need within us to be happier, healthier, less stressed, or anxious in life? This book shows you how that can be true – people who apply this book's practices in their life have been shown to experience these benefits. You will learn how you can build your happiness and manage your stress at the same time! Dr. Ryan Niemiec, a global leader in character strengths and mindfulness, expertly walks you through how you can develop your best qualities. Some of these qualities – whether it is courage, zest, creativity, mindfulness, hope, self-regulation, or leadership – may be hidden, blocked, or lost. They are awaiting your discovery! Modern science is revealing new pathways for living a full life. The practices and ideas compiled in this book are some of the best strategies available to help you lead that life of authenticity, peace, strength, and meaning. And, these strategies aren't just for you – they're for all of us. They help build stronger relationships and contribute to the greater good. Packed with stories, practices, tips, and insightful research findings, this book has everything you need to work with your strengths and your mindfulness. What you have here is a toolbox of strategies for life. The toolbox is woven together in a process that you can easily tailor to your current work, family, and social life. This book can be also used in conjunction with participation in the groundbreaking Mindfulness-Based Strengths Practice program.

Leseprobe

The Mindfulness and Character Strengths Workbook

Ryan M. Niemiec, PsyD

About the Author

Ryan M. Niemiec (pronounced “knee-mick”), PsyD, is a leading international figure in the education, science, and practice of character strengths that are found in all human beings. Dr. Niemiec is Chief Science and Education Officer of the renown Values in Action (VIA) Institute on Character, a nonprofit organization in Cincinnati, Ohio, that leads the global advancement of the science of character strengths. He has been at the center of this work, positively impacting many millions of people.

Ryan is also an award-winning psychologist, certified coach, annual instructor at the University of Pennsylvania, and a member of the special guest faculty at five coaching and positive psychology institutes. Ryan received the Distinguished Early Career Award from the American Psychological Association and was awarded Fellow of the International Positive Psychology Association (IPPA), also serving on their Council of Advisors. He is cofounder and president of the Spirituality/Meaning Division of IPPA.

Ryan has authored 14 books, over 100 academic papers, and several hundred user-friendly articles (his blog on Psychology Today is called What Matters Most?). His books include the bestselling consumer book The Power of Character Strengths and books on stress management, strengths in teens, positive movies, and strengths for disabilities/abilities. He is also the author of the two leading practitioner-focused books in positive psychology – Character Strengths Interventions and Mindfulness and Character Strengths. The latter book contains the evidenced-based program he founded, mindfulness-based strengths practice (MBSP), now used by practitioners and researchers in more than 50 countries. He created an MBSP Certification in 2021, the first character strengths certification program. Ryan has led hundreds of mindfulness-based program sessions for clinical and lay audiences and has led the MBSP program in particular over 20 times.

Ryan cofounded Blooming Strengths Sangha, an open, global mindfulness and character strengths community that focuses on practices, experiences, and mindful-living community building. His lineage name, in the tradition of Thich Nhat Hanh, is Fullest Breath of the Heart, and he is an aspirant for ordination in the Order of Interbeing.

Ryan lives in Cincinnati with his wife and three young, zestful children. His highest strengths are hope, love, honesty, fairness, spirituality, curiosity, and appreciation of beauty. In his leisure time, he practices tai chi, plays tennis, basketball, and chess, and is a zealot of Michigan State University athletics, a collector of vintage and rare Pez dispensers. He also engages in creative writing and in building communities in mindfulness and character strengths.

Library of Congress of Congress Cataloging in Publication information for the accompanying therapists’ guide Mindfulness and Character Strengths: A Practical Guide to MBSP is available via the Library of Congress Marc Database under the Library of Congress Control Number 2023938679

Library and Archives Canada Cataloguing in Publication

Title: The mindfulness and character strengths workbook / Ryan M. Niemiec, PsyD.

Names: Niemiec, Ryan M., author.

Description: Includes bibliographical references.

Identifiers: Canadiana (print) 20230447805 | Canadiana (ebook) 20230447953 | ISBN 9780889376380

(softcover) | ISBN 9781616766382 (PDF) | ISBN 9781613346389 (EPUB)

Subjects: LCSH: Meditation—Problems, exercises, etc. | LCSH: Attention—Problems, exercises, etc. |

LCSH: Character—Problems, exercises, etc. | LCSH: Self-actualization (Psychology)—Problems,

exercises, etc. | LCGFT: Problems and exercises.

Classification: LCC BF637.M4 N534 2023 | DDC 158.1/2—dc23

© 2024 by Hogrefe Publishing

www.hogrefe.com

The author and publisher have made every effort to ensure that the information contained in this publication is in accordance with current scientific standards and practices at the time of publication. Despite the care taken in the production and correction of the text, errors cannot be completely ruled out. The author and publisher make no representations or warranties of any kind and assume no liabilities of any kind with respect to the accuracy or completeness of the contents (procedure, therapy, amounts, doses, applications etc.) and specifically disclaim any implied warranties of merchantability or fitness of use for a particular purpose. Neither the author nor the publisher shall be held liable or responsible to any person or entity with respect to any loss or incidental or consequential damages caused, or alleged to have been caused, directly or indirectly, by the information contained herein. Trademarks and registered names are not distinguished in the text; the absence of such explicit marking does not mean that any name is not a trademarked name.

This is not a replacement for mental health or medical treatment.

Cover image: iStock.com/Sylvia Becerra Gonzalez

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Copyright Information

The eBook, including all its individual chapters, is protected under international copyright law. The unauthorized use or distribution of copyrighted or proprietary content is illegal and could subject the purchaser to substantial damages. The user agrees to recognize and uphold the copyright.

License Agreement

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ISBN 978-0-88937-638-0 (print) • ISBN 978-1-61676-638-2 (PDF) • ISBN 978-1-61334-638-9 (EPUB)

http://doi.org/10.1027/00638-000

Citability: This EPUB includes page numbering between two vertical lines (Example: |1|) that corresponds to the page numbering of the print and PDF ebook versions of the title.

Dedication

I once had this conversation with a wise person: I asked them,

“Of all the great teachings out there, what is the best practice you would recommend?”

“There is only one practice that matters,” they said.

“Really?! Which one?” I asked.

“The one you do.”

I dedicate this book to my wise teachers, past and present, all who reside in my present.

One of my wise teachers is my son Ryland who reminds me that mindfulness should be playful and enjoyable. He dislikes brushing his teeth so to improve the experience, one morning when I was helping him brush I asked him to take a slow inhale and exhale while brushing. After the inhale, which he found a bit odd, he exclaimed out of nowhere, “Chicken!” Now, hundreds of times later, as I support him in brushing, we take an inbreath, exclaim “Chicken!”, roar with laughter, and continue brushing.

This is true mindful teeth-brushing. May I always learn from you, my gentle and loving boy, Ryland.

|v|Gratitude

I am grateful there are authentic and meaning-filled organizations such as the two that are central to the creation of this book – the VIA Institute and Hogrefe Publishing – and the wonderful people that help these companies shine.

I deeply appreciate those who had a positive impact on the creation of this Workbook: Ruth Pearce, Breta Cooper, Kelly Aluise, Matthijs Steeneveld, Dandan Pang, Masaya Okamoto, Roger Bretherton, and Polina Beloborodova, hundreds of MBSP participants, and three MBSP Certification cohorts.

With thankfulness to my family, friends, and other colleagues, past and present. I acknowledge, with a sense of interbeing, that none of what I do is alone and all I do is a culmination of countless experiences and efforts of you and others across numerous generations. From an immediate perspective, I bow to my Mom, Dad, siblings, wife, and three children. Love to “R4 x M” always...

Contents

Gratitude

Preface

Introduction: Beginning Your Journey

Session 1: Mindfulness and Autopilot

Session 2: Your Character Strengths and Signature Strengths

Session 3: Obstacles and Struggles Are Opportunities

Session 4: Strengthening Mindfulness in Everyday Life

Session 5: Your Relationship With Yourself and Others

Session 6: Mindfulness of the Golden Mean

Session 7: Authenticity and Goodness

Session 8: Your Engagement With Life

Concluding Thoughts

Notes on Supplementary Materials

Resources

Recommended Reading

About the VIA Institute

|xi|Preface

A student asked a Zen master, “What is the most important thing?” and the Zen master responded with, “The most important thing is to remember the most important thing.”

With mindfulness (your curious and open awareness) and character strengths (the best, core parts of you), you always have the most important things within you. As you learn, practice, and discuss these areas, you’ll take notice of your kindness and fairness, you’ll feel more gratitude and hope, you’ll uncover your bravery and perseverance, connect with your honesty and humility, and readily use your curiosity and spirituality. You’ll see that mindfulness and character strengths are pathways to the most important thing, and they are the most important thing itself.

What is your “most important thing?” For me, it is my family. Is family not a manifestation of our love, kindness, forgiveness, social intelligence, humor, gratitude, and mindful attention? For someone else, the most important thing might be work productivity or contributing to others. Is that not a manifestation of perseverance, zest, self-regulation, hope, kindness, creativity, and mindful effort?

Mindfulness and character strengths are within all of us, and they are for all of us – regardless of age, gender, occupation, education level, country of origin, beliefs, and personality type. The many benefits of mindfulness and of character strengths are captured in the graphic above. Modern science points to these two overarching buckets of benefit – the uplift to our well-being and the facing, coping with, or overcoming of adversity.

Within each, there are many streams of benefit such as enhancing happiness, inner peace, meaning in life, improved health, better work performance, and more positive relationships in the well-being bucket. And in the adversity bucket, there is stress management, illness coping, reducing relationship conflict, and handling anxiety, sadness, and anger. Both mindfulness and character strengths help with well-being and with adversity. Imagine what bringing them together can do!

I wrote this Workbook for two main reasons: One, there are no available books for the general public on the integration of character strengths and mindfulness. Two, I heard over and over again from practitioners leading mindfulness-based strengths practice (MBSP) sessions that they needed a user-friendly book for their MBSP students, employees, and clients. This is that Workbook to serve both purposes!

Therefore, this Workbook is a stand-alone resource for anyone. If you are not part of an MBSP program or group, then you might view this Workbook as a guidebook supporting you. View the Workbook as containing your own personal self-development sessions! You might take 1 week per session (give or take) and really dig into your personal growth, and engage in the explorations, activities, and suggestions in the worksheets. May this Workbook be like a peaceful yet challenging friend, supporting you on your life journey.

And, this Workbook can (and should) be used as a companion for those participating in MBSP groups or individual MBSP sessions or workshops. The facilitator of MBSP will naturally have the MBSP manual found in Mindfulness and Character Strengths (2nd edition), which was written for practitioners who lead MBSP programs and who study the integration of mindfulness and character strengths. MBSP facilitators will often recommend that participants attain this Workbook you have in your hands. You’ll be able to follow along in this Workbook session-by-session with the 8-week program of MBSP. You have the activities, worksheets, home practice suggestions, and more (!). It is all right here, and I hope it will help you make the most of the MBSP experience, help you connect with others in your MBSP community, and support you on your life journey.

If you are interested in learning more about what MBSP is, then you can read Reading Activity 1.1 in Session 1.

|xii|The MBSP program is being used across the globe, having reached every continent (except Antarctica), with an estimated hundreds of MBSP facilitators (in-person and virtual) from all walks of life – coaches, psychologists, business professionals, human resources specialists, teachers, parents, and scientists. They report that participants experience large benefits from the program. The latest science is showing their findings are not unique to them. When MBSP has been compared with the most popular mindfulness-based program on the planet (mindfulness-based stress reduction/MBSR), MBSP has come out as stronger every time.

All of this means you have arrived at the right place. Whether you are hoping to manage stress and problems better, are seeking growth and self-improvement, or are helping others to do the same, this Workbook will be an important and supportive tool for your journey.

May this Workbook brighten your journey, lighten your tension, and deepen the joy and meaning of your life.

Ryan M. Niemiec

July 2023

|1|Introduction: Beginning Your Journey

Smile, breathe, and go slowly.

Thich Nhat Hanh

A story to remember

I was in a Zoom meeting with a group of 20 people – all cameras on. It was a social gathering, but the topic had grown serious – one of the members had an untreatable cancer and was speaking about how he was coping with his situation. The mood was somber, and all of the participants were attending closely to the man as he slowly shared his experiences, with a heaviness in his voice. Then, unbeknownst to me the head of Maya, my 7-year-old daughter, popped up behind mine on the screen. She must have picked the lock on my office door and crept in! At an angle, she smiled widely and curiously at the many faces of the group. I immediately attempted to verbally guide her to the door, while simultaneously listening to the man sharing his suffering, but she responded by breaking out into one of her new dance moves and starting to sing (thankfully, my computer was muted). My words were futile to my dancing daughter, as were my feigned attempts to continue listening closely to my friend.

As I started to stand up to physically guide Maya to the door, he spoke to us: “And I appreciate the young new member of our meeting,” and he began to laugh. Smiles began to appear throughout the group. “I needed that levity right now. Sometimes it is just too much always talking about my cancer.” He paused, with the group hanging on every word. “This little girl’s curiosity…and humor…and zest – that’s what I needed to see. That’s what I want for myself too, right now. Thank you, thank you.”

Your Journey Begins Now

Life can appear messy and unpredictable. Often there are no perfect responses – only responses. However, we have tools to help us. We have tools to make our lives better and the lives around us better.

The pursuit of a happier and more meaningful life is vitally important to people in today’s world. The challenges, stressors, and obstacles to building greater well-being, better relationships, more work productivity, and a higher purpose are too numerous to count.

New research shows that practices with mindfulness and character strengths offer some of the best pathways for you to not only unleash greater fulfillment and live your best life but also improve in managing your problems, stressors, conflicts, and other typical life adversities. This Workbook will help you boost your mindfulness and your character strengths. You’ll learn ways to catch your mind wandering and being distracted, and become more mindful at home, work, and in your relationships. You’ll learn ways to become more tuned into your best qualities – your character strengths – and how to explore and use them not only more frequently but more wisely. Along the journey, you’ll practice the many ways to weave together both, in your daily life.

If you smile, breathe, and go slowly, you’ll soon see, mindfulness and character strengths work hand in glove.

Why Bring Mindfulness and Character Strengths Together?

You will soon dive into mindful awareness practices and character strengths practices. The latest science shows that mindfulness practices help you feel happier and more positive, as well as give you a strong boost in your coping skills to deal with stress and other life difficulties. Research suggests the same is true for practices involving your character strengths. But what are the benefits of |2|bringing the two together and developing them in unison?

Here is a summary of the importance of bringing mindfulness and character strengths together.

Mindfulness without character strengths is deflated. Many people who engage in mindfulness or meditation practices quickly lose focus, find their interest wanes, and hit so many detours that they give up. Character strengths provide energy, substance, and direction to the practice of mindfulness. Strengths help you to start and then maintain a practice of mindful walking, of mindful listening, or of mindful meditation. They lead you to get the most out of mindfulness practices.

Character strengths without mindfulness are hollow. The mindless use of our character strengths is commonplace (think of an automatic “Thank you” or “I love you” that we offer without even thinking about it, without conscious use of your character strengths of gratitude and love). At times we may speak in ways that are superficial and unconscious, and at other times judgmental or unbalanced. As mindfulness is applied to character strengths, however, use of them becomes focused, like an archer directing an arrow to a bull’s-eye. Your relationships are enhanced. Meaning is deepened. Fulfillment is reached.

Mindfulness, Character Strengths, and You!

In this Workbook, you will:

Discover and deeply understand your inner capacity to be mindful and to see and use your character strengths.

Identify your signature strengths, overused strengths, and underused strengths, and how to improve each.

Examine ways you can connect character strengths and mindfulness in your life to enhance your well-being and manage problems.

Learn new ways to apply mindfulness to your character strengths and, in turn, to apply your character strengths to daily mindful living.

Build your mindfulness/character strengths toolbox by gathering numerous practical strategies that can be used throughout your life.

Take immediate action with your character strengths and mindfulness.

A wonderful way to grow your self-awareness is to explore your mindfulness and character strengths from multiple angles. This Workbook guides you through doing that by offering a variety of questions, activities, and opportunities to reflect on your thoughts, feelings, ideas, actions, and behaviors. In the process of connecting the dots, you can formulate a plan to bring your strengths and mindfulness into your everyday life.

This Workbook will help you explore your mindfulness and character strengths and support you with reflection questions. Let’s try it now:

|3| What got you interested in mindfulness and/or character strengths?

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What excites you about these topics?

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What brought you to this particular set of self-awareness tools?

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What do you hope to accomplish by engaging with this workbook?

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|4|Your journey toward elevating your mindfulness and character strengths will be fluid – new ideas, activities, conversations, and meditations will come and go. Each has the potential to impact you positively. Allow yourself to be open to the possibilities as you navigate the terrain that is within you.

You’ll discover that turning to your mindfulness and your character strengths is always an option you can take in life to help you reach greater fulfillment, fortify your personal relationships, and achieve the goals that matter most to you. Enjoy!

How to use this workbook mindfully

Start with Session 1 and work through the material sequentially.

Give yourself about 1 week per session. You may find that longer or shorter spans are called for per session, so do what works best for you.

Following the reading and reflection questions in each session, you’ll find a tracking sheet to self-monitor your experience during the week and highlight the week’s audio meditations (Audio Tracks; available online to purchasers of the book, see p. 145f. on how to access this material) and practice activities. These activities have been designed to build on the lessons from the chapter and will help you start, expand, and deepen your practice of mindfulness and character strengths.

At the end of each Session there is a summary (Your MBSP Toolbox) of the key insights and the science on the topic at hand, as well as questions for exploration, pearls of wisdom, and the MBSP tools.

For those completing a MBSP program with a practitioner, they will provide guidance as to when to ideally complete the activities. For some MBSP groups, the MBSP practitioner (facilitator, leader) will suggest to do the session’s reading/reflecting/activities prior to the group session and for others it will be suggested to start them after the session occurs, while for others it will be a flexible mix of these approaches. The timing will reflect the MBSP leader’s teaching style, the timing during the week the live session occurs, and other factors.

Be patient. Use perseverance to let your mindfulness and character strengths develop and expand.

Share your experiences. You will reinforce your insights by discussing them with others.

Working to combine and build mindfulness and character strengths is an ongoing journey.

|5|Session 1: Mindfulness and Autopilot

There is another world. And it is in this one.

Paul Eluard

A story to remember

There was a quiet entomologist who attended a mindfulness-based strengths practice (MBSP) program. He described himself as a loner and was clear to say, “I study bugs, not people.” In the first session he explained that when he does talk, he talks a lot, noting this probably had something to do with his difficulty relating to others and filling up the silence due to his uncertainty around people. He explained one of his intentions in MBSP was to develop more mindful speech, saying, “I want to speak less, listen better, and most of all, understand more.” As the group dynamic unfolded, he flowered. Bringing mindfulness to his autopilot speaking and hearing others describe his creativity, kindness, and fairness, would often bring him to tears. These were parts of himself that were always there, but he was now opening up to them. He heard stories from group members about showing love for their father, and he wished he had shown more love to his father before he passed away. He focused on understanding this – understanding himself and his loss and suffering and also understanding the group member’s experience. As his journey progressed, he summarized his experience as – “Perhaps I don’t study bugs or people, I study the interconnection among all forms of life, and I wish to continue my understanding of those connections.”

This now-curious entomologist took great care to attend to his autopilot mind and grow in mindfulness and strengths, resulting in deep and ongoing personal impact. This is possible for each one of us.

What Is Mindfulness?

What comes to mind when you hear the word “mindfulness”? Write your responses in the space provided below each question.

|6| What is mindfulness?

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How would you describe mindfulness to someone?

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How is mindfulness practiced?

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There are many useful definitions and ideas about mindfulness. One of the best (and strongest, from a scientific perspective) is that mindfulness has two core parts:

Self-regulation: This means you take control of what you put your attention on. Are you deciding to focus on inhaling and exhaling, on your child’s face, the computer screen in front of you, the taste of your soup, or the feeling of cool air against your skin? When you deliberately put your attention on something, that is one part of your mindfulness. This is the “what” of mindfulness.

Curiosity, openness, acceptance: This means you open your mind to whatever you are focusing on – to be interested and open to it. This attitude also involves acceptance of what is happening in the moment, whether that’s stress, a positive feeling, or boredom – not trying to change it, not trying to criticize it, but simply accepting the reality in this particular moment, putting your curiosity to work. This is the “how” of mindfulness.

Did either of these elements come up in your written descriptions? If not, you can begin to weave these two parts into your thinking about mindfulness and when you are practicing “being more mindful.” As you go about your day, you might say to yourself, “I’m going to take greater control of what I focus on and I’m going to be curious and accepting of this difficulty I’m thinking about.”

|7|This way of understanding mindfulness can be applied to anything we are doing – working, driving, scrolling on social media, showering, crying, laughing, running, shopping. At any time, you can take control of your attention and focus it on your fingers as they make contact with your device’s screen, for example, or with the softness of the fur of your pet. Your approach can be one of openness and curiosity – for example, being curious about the movement of your legs as you exercise and open to the words of your colleague as you listen.

In this way, mindfulness is a form of meditation (“meditation” is a specific practice, usually involving focused attention, that is used to cultivate greater mindfulness). You can learn to follow your in-breath and out-breath while sitting calmly in a chair. And mindfulness can be meditation in motion when you attend to your feet and posture and the pacing of your strides when you walk. You can mindfully eat a bite of food using all of your senses.

With mindfulness, you have the opportunity to experience your life deliberately and completely.

Despite the simplicity of this explanation, there is a lot of confusion about what mindfulness is, a lot of talk about “being in the present moment.” And rightfully so, since research shows that a mindfulness practice helps people improve their well-being and manage their stress. As popular as mindfulness is in the current climate, however, there are still many misconceptions about it.

What Mindfulness Is Not

Mindfulness is not the same as a trance state, being in “flow,” spiritual “oneness,” or reciting mantras. It does not mean making your body totally calm and relaxed, being in a quiet place, sitting still, or giving up control of your mind. It does not have to involve a guru or wise person. Did any of those misconceptions come up in your answers to the questions earlier? If they did, that is normal. As you work through this Workbook, your understanding of mindfulness will evolve and you will reap the benefits of that.

A great way to start the process of expanding your understanding of mindfulness is to consider times when you are not mindful (which, for most of us, is most of the time). This common state of mind is referred to as autopilot mind. This occurs when we go through the motions of an activity without much awareness, not attending to the sights, smells, sounds, body language, emotions, thoughts, desires, and other stimuli within us and around us.