fearlessly fragile E-Book

Madison Diana Foit

• Herausgeber: Books on Demand
• Kategorie: Poesie und Drama
• Sprache: Englisch

Seitenzahl: 48

Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2024

Beschreibung

"and suddenly i believed taylor was right once again, because this pain wouldn't be for evermore" "fearlessly fragile" is a poetry book inspired by the daily life of a 21-year-old woman who found her peace and love in being a swiftie while actively finding herself and recovering from mental illnesses. it's about loving loudly, raw emotions, deep topics and a lot of taylor swift references as well. it's about messy feelings and trying to figure out life in the earliest twenties, seeing the little things through an optimistic lense.

Leseprobe

to everyone who ever made me feel like i was enough

a written polaroid about being twenty-one

...

headfirst, fearless

...

they said, you’ll be someone else and just the same. they were right.

content warnings for this one:

body shaming

fatphobia

eating disorders

familial and emotional abuse

sexual abuse

illegal prostitution

heartbreak

self-harming behaviors

self-loathing

loss and death

thank you for reading, feeling and healing with me <3

let the woman pass

the father said

holding his son's hand

i'm wearing my best friend's dress

which reminds me of my mom's

in 2014

i pass by and realize

they were talking about

me

and i'm twenty-one

and no longer young and helpless

loving

not just the music but

the artist themselves

is like

loving someone for

who they are

instead of just crushing

on a favorite part of

them

-thank you, taylor

since i already got the

first thing

i cannot wait for

the second

one

-thank you again, taylor

singing on the balcony and

everything feels so

free i am

free

heart so light and soul so

clean

despite some waging greyish

waves

that i'm just painting

pink

to match the sky and how i feel

when was the last time i

cried

because being

alive

is the

greatest gift i ever

faced?

the sky in its lover

era

folklore quietly playing

and my eyes watering up

staring

above

alcohol free fancy drink and

snacks that fill body and my

soul

lesbian romance in the

book on my

legs

and on my mind

wishing hoping

longing

simplicity that brings me

tears

healing parts i never felt

i'm so soft and light and grateful

and on one of the longest

days

of twenty-twenty-three

i knew

i'll repeat it all tomorrow

long skirts

my legs feeling the

wind

my hair not listening

and the heat is not too

much

because when something is too

much

i always handle it with

grace

like i always do

maybe the quiet moments

are so

appreciated now because

all i was, was

loud

and now i learned to

breathe

and also, finally listen

headfirst, fearless

a lyric so simple

yes, i appreciate the complicated words

like everything i ever went

through but

my heart wants

peace

and to be

fearless

-thank you for teaching me, taylor

i touched him

directly

where we innocently

feel in

love

as a form of

revenge

two years later,

it disgusts me.

he did not want my

body

but all you craved was

mine.

where's the

connection?

please be hungry for my body

just the way you take my

soul

two aches

in one

can we be

one?

would you..

let me?

but if the story is over, why am i still writing pages?

taylor swift

death by a thousand cuts

years ago

i dedicated

lover

by taylor swift

to you

the biggest harry stan i

know

i didn't know they were dating

years ago

not then

i'm a swiftie now

and you probably still love

harry

they fell

apart

just like we did

i don't know if i would stand up

when nobody applauds for

you

we were broken people that made each other

worse.

because sometimes

when you're 17

you don't know

better.

i wish i could listen to

harry

again

after all this time

i'm still recovering after

two and a half years

yesterday, i finally listened to

lover

again

and i wonder what

could've been

would've been

should've been

you

but we're never getting back

together because you

hate me

and i understand

all that's left is my first ever

tattoo

and me begging you to get

better

it's time to be

fearless again

i say

i wonder if you know that

we could have been

golden

like both our favorite artists

said

our favorite artists fell apart

like

we

did

and it hurts that

you will never know

that you should have thought of

me

when listening to taylor

maybe

i wish i didn't remember it

all too well because

i surely don't want

to

but my sparkles are back

and i'll be shining

over your sad empty town

but

never forget the

beautiful tragic love

we had

-060116

january, 2021

you left me a day before

we would have had

our

meetiversary

the fifth one.

the one i still have tattooed on my

right arm.

it was my first tattoo,

ever.

"ideservebetter2021"

that's what happened when i

changed my laptop password

to when i could not take it

being the day, we decided

to officially be in

love.

and now it's 2023

and i still have that password in and

all i am thinking now is

i deserved better

in 2021,

too.

what if i said that

even after two and a half

years

i still cannot listen to

certain songs and

i get mad over things you once

said

and i wonder

really deeply wonder if

i impact your life like

that too,

still

-i just know that you don't want to be associated with me

anymore, at all

you taught me

silent cries

which i never could

do and sometimes they are

practical

but i wish

i never needed them

or at least

never would have

learned

them

that way

-06012016

it's been more than three years

since we last spoke

yet i search for you

on every street

every day of my

life

in any man that looks as

old and similar as you might

look like if you actually started

transitioning

in every woman that slightly looks like

the girl i met back then

or the woman i fell in love

with

over all these years

slightly and desperately

craving and aching

breaking and

i sing the one direction

songs at parties

because i know them because of us

i'm just here for taylor

i wonder if you like a song of

hers

I don't wanna live forever, maybe?

those nights are the best ones but the ones with you they

weren't the best nights

the ones with the most

feeling

and tears and hopelessness and depression and suffering

and

i can listen to the same songs

again

but my therapist said

i'm traumatized