Homeschool Rising E-Book

• Herausgeber: John Wiley & Sons
• Kategorie: Bildung
• Sprache: Englisch

Seitenzahl: 316

Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2024

Beschreibung

Take a good look at the reasons why homeschooling can help today's kids thrive

Homeschool Rising is a guide for anyone interested in homeschooling their children, regardless of background. It busts through the myths surrounding homeschooling, reveals the failures of our current school system, and demonstrates how home education and loving, motivated parents can provide a solution for students and families everywhere.

There are many assumptions made about homeschooling—that the child will be "socially awkward" due to lack of social interaction, that parents are not equipped to educate their children, that homeschooling is only for White, Christian, middle-class parents, and more. In Homeschool Rising, educator Christy-Faith offers insights from more than 20 years in the field and her experience working with thousands of students to debunk these myths and misconceptions.

The truth is, homeschooling sets today’s students up for success in a way that traditional schooling no longer can. This authoritative yet casual and accessible guide provides parents the tools, courage, and knowledge to opt out of the school system and take charge of their children's education.

• Clear up the confusion and misconception surrounding homeschooling
• See why homeschooling is a great option for kids of any race, religion, and background
• Gain the knowledge you need to start your kids off on the right foot with homeschooling
• Make sure your homeschooled kids are getting the support they need academically and socially

New and experienced homeschoolers looking for support, as well as educators, psychologists, and others who work with homeschooled children, will love the clear, evidence-backed, and conversational information in Homeschool Rising.

Leseprobe

Table of Contents

Cover

Table of Contents

Title Page

Copyright

Dedication

Author's Note

Foreword

PART ONE: Rethinking Childhood

CHAPTER ONE: The Most Dangerous Question: What Makes for a Great Education?

Chasing Grades

The Dawn of Grade Perfectionism (and Performance Anxiety)

The Problem with the Plan

Perpetuating the Cycle

My Deconstruction Begins

Finding Hope in Unexpected Places

From One Heart to Another

Remember This

Notes

CHAPTER TWO: The Homeschool Revolution: Why Parents Are Pulling Out Their Kids in Droves

The Seismic Shift of Enrollment from 2020 to 2021

Who Are the New Faces of the Homeschooling Movement?

Traditional Schooling Is Culpable for the Death of Thousands of Children and Teens Every Year

Traditional Schooling Is Wreaking Unfathomable Damage on the Mental Health of Children and Teens

Yes, Homeschooled Students Outpace Their Traditional School Peers in Academic Proficiency

Families and Relationships Are Suffering because of Traditional Schooling

Homeschooled Students Are More Positive and Well Adjusted Compared to Traditionally Educated Students

Homeschooling Changes the Conversation for Parents and Children

Remember This

Notes

PART TWO: The Great Experiment

CHAPTER THREE: In Plain Sight: The Juicy History and Enduring Legacy of Public Schooling

Episode 1: Colonial America—The Scandal of Independent Thinking

Episode 2: The European Industrial Revolution—Factories, Steam, and Schooling for All

Episode 3: From Prussia with Love (and an Agenda)

Episode 4: The Mann Who Imported the Great Experiment to the United States

Episode 5: Meet John Dewey, Father of Progressive Education

Episode 6: Back to Present Day

Episode 7: Recovering from This “Great Experiment”

Remember This

Notes

CHAPTER FOUR: From Helpful to Harmful: What Changed in Education and Why It Matters

Did Schooling Kill Education?

Changing the Purpose of Education

Changing the Skills of Education

Changing the Focus of Education

Changing the Motivation of Education

Changing of the Guard for Education

Changing the Pedagogy of Education

Remember This

Notes

PART THREE: The Extraordinary Potential of Homeschooling

CHAPTER FIVE: The Homeschooling Edge: Where Possibilities Flourish

The Power of Stopping, Slowing Down, or Speeding Up

Igniting a Fire versus Filling a Bucket

Fostering Inquisitiveness

Aligning Your Values

Graduating Thinkers

Where Do We Go Next?

Remember This

Notes

CHAPTER SIX: Understanding Homeschooling: What It Is and Why People Do It

What Is

Homeschooling

?

Common Characteristics of Homeschooling

Why Are More Families Choosing to Homeschool Their Children?

A Variety of Diverse Pedagogies and Learning Methods Are Available

When Your Child Turns Five, Do You Suddenly become Incompetent?

Remember This

Notes

PART FOUR: Insight into Homeschooling: Separating Fact from Fiction

CHAPTER SEVEN: Flipping the Script on Socialization: The Most Common Objection Is Our Greatest Strength

Groupthink: The Power of Slogans, Stereotypes, and Word Association

Risk Aversion: The Dominance of Fear in Decision-Making

Confirmation Bias: Clinging to Beliefs Despite Evidence

The Uncomfortable Truth We Must Embrace

“Fitting In” Is Not the Same as “Belonging”

The Dangers of Peer Orientation

Exploring the Social Experience of Homeschoolers

Age Mixing

Interactions with Adults

The Academic Experience of Homeschoolers

Characteristics of Healthy Socialization

Quality Not Quantity

Remember This

Notes

CHAPTER EIGHT: Hitting the Books: Educational Myths about Homeschooling

Myth: “Homeschoolers Are behind Academically”

Myth: “Professionals Are the Only Ones Qualified to Teach, Especially Kids with Special Needs”

Myth: “I Don't Have the Time to Teach a Full School Day”

Myth: “It's Too Hard to Teach Multiple Kids in Different Grade Levels”

Myth: “We Need to Trust Educational Experts to Decide What Kids Learn”

Myth: “Your Child Will Not Be Prepared to Take the SAT or ACT If They're Homeschooled”

Myth: “Homeschooled High School Students Need an Accredited Diploma to Get into College”

Remember This

Notes

CHAPTER NINE: Moving Beyond the Shadow of Doubt: Common Homeschooling Hang-Ups and Fears

Myth: “Homeschoolers Are Stuck at Home”

Myth: “Homeschooled Kids Are Sheltered from the Real World”

Myth: “Kids Need to Be in School to ‘Toughen Up’”

Myth: “Homeschooled Kids Will Miss Out on Prom, Team Sports, Clubs, Graduation, and So On”

Myth: “Kids Who Have a High Social Need Should Not Be Homeschooled”

Myth: “Homeschooled Kids Will Fall behind Academically”

Fear: “I Don't Have the Expertise and Knowledge of the Subject Matter to Teach My Kids”

Fear: “I Don't Have the Patience to Homeschool”

Fear: “I Can't Homeschool because My Kid Won't Listen to Me”

Fear: “What If My Child Doesn't Want to Homeschool?”

Fear: “How Can I Teach If I'm Not Certified or Credentialed?”

Fear: “What If My Partner Won't Support My Decision to Homeschool?”

Fear: “What If My Relatives and Friends Won't Support My Decision to Homeschool?”

Fear: “I'm So Scared of Being Lonely. I Don't Want to Be Miserable”

Gray Cardinals

Remember This

Notes

PART FIVE: Finding Your Why and Leaning into Hope

CHAPTER TEN: Deschooling: Your Bridge over Anxious Waters

Deschooling Is Essential for Detoxifying

Deschooling Initiates Clarity and Reconstruction of Thought

Deschooling Helps to Level the Storm

Deschooling Is Essential for Your Family's Joy and Love of Learning

But What If I Never Went to Traditional Schools?

When and How to Deschool

20 Questions to Kickstart Your Deschooling Adventure (for Newbies and Homeschool Veterans Alike)

Remember This

Notes

CHAPTER ELEVEN: You Are Enough

Remember This

Note

About the Author

Let's Connect

Index

End User License Agreement

List of Illustrations

Chapter 2

FIGURE 2.1 A dramatic rise in homeschooling

Chapter 8

FIGURE 8.1 The time your homeschooled child may need to devote to their stud...

Guide

Cover

Table of Contents

Title Page

Copyright

Dedication

Author's Note

Foreword

Begin Reading

About the Author

Let's Connect

Index

End User License Agreement

Pages

i

v

vi

ix

xi

xiii

xiv

xv

xvi

1

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

10

11

12

13

14

15

16

17

18

19

21

22

23

24

25

26

27

28

29

30

31

32

33

34

35

36

37

38

39

40

41

42

43

44

45

46

47

49

51

52

53

54

55

56

57

58

59

60

61

62

63

64

65

66

67

68

69

70

71

72

73

74

75

76

77

78

79

80

81

82

83

84

85

86

87

88

89

90

91

92

93

94

95

96

97

98

99

100

101

103

104

105

106

107

108

109

110

111

112

113

114

115

116

117

118

119

121

122

123

124

125

126

127

128

129

130

131

132

133

134

135

137

139

140

141

142

143

144

145

146

147

148

149

150

151

152

153

154

155

156

157

158

159

160

161

162

163

164

165

166

167

168

169

170

171

172

173

174

175

176

177

178

179

180

181

182

183

184

185

186

187

188

189

190

191

192

193

194

195

196

197

198

199

200

201

202

203

204

205

206

207

209

210

211

212

213

214

215

216

217

218

219

220

221

222

223

224

225

226

227

228

229

230

231

232

233

234

235

236

237

238

239

241

242

257

259

260

261

262

263

264

265

266

267

268

269

270

271

272

273

Praise for Homeschool Rising

“Homeschool Rising is just what parents need as they jump headlong into the adventure that homeschooling can be. Christy-Faith is a natural encourager who backs it all up with sound research and a warm heart for the parents she knows will benefit from reading this timely book. Occasionally, we doubt our choices as parents, and this book provides the right combination of helpful reminders, new ideas, and the inspiration a homeschooler needs to see their child's education through to the end. It will be a welcome tool in the hands of any parent—whether they're already homeschooling or are just thinking about getting started.”

—Colleen Kessler, M.Ed., Author of The Homeschool Advantage: A Child-Focused Approach to Raising Lifelong Learners and Raising Resilient Sons: A Boy Mom's Guide to Building Strong, Confident, and Emotionally Intelligent Families

“Every parent should read this book as they make educational choices for their children. Christy-Faith reminds us that we don't have to be fearful while we return to the roots of individualized education. Instead, we can confidently impact the future of our children one homeschool at a time.”

—Sarah Collins, MSOT, OTR/L, Owner of HomeschoolOT

“Homeschool Rising is the comprehensive, well-researched encouragement I wish I had 15 years ago when I began homeschooling. With her vast experience in education, Christy-Faith dispels common misconceptions, equips parents, and sheds a bright light on the value and benefit of choosing the transformative educational path of homeschooling.”

—Marni Love, Certified Parent Coach and Homeschool Mentor

Homeschool Rising

Shattering Myths, Finding Courage, and Opting Out of the School System

Christy-Faith

Copyright © 2024 John Wiley & Sons, Inc. All rights reserved.

Published by John Wiley & Sons, Inc., Hoboken, New Jersey.Published simultaneously in Canada.

ISBNs: 9781394191536 (Paperback), 9781394191550 (ePDF), 9781394191543 (ePub)

No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, scanning, or otherwise, except as permitted under Section 107 or 108 of the 1976 United States Copyright Act, without either the prior written permission of the Publisher, or authorization through payment of the appropriate per-copy fee to the Copyright Clearance Center, Inc., 222 Rosewood Drive, Danvers, MA 01923, [phone], fax [phone], or on the web at www.copyright.com. Requests to the Publisher for permission should be addressed to the Permissions Department, John Wiley & Sons, Inc., 111 River Street, Hoboken, NJ 07030, [phone], fax [phone], or online at www.wiley.com/go/permission.

Trademarks: Wiley and the Wiley logo are trademarks or registered trademarks of John Wiley & Sons, Inc. and/or its affiliates in the United States and other countries and may not be used without written permission. All other trademarks are the property of their respective owners. John Wiley & Sons, Inc. is not associated with any product or vendor mentioned in this book.

Limit of Liability/Disclaimer of Warranty: While the publisher and author have used their best efforts in preparing this book, they make no representations or warranties with respect to the accuracy or completeness of the contents of this book and specifically disclaim any implied warranties of merchantability or fitness for a particular purpose. No warranty may be created or extended by sales representatives or written sales materials. The advice and strategies contained herein may not be suitable for your situation. You should consult with a professional where appropriate. Further, readers should be aware that websites listed in this work may have changed or disappeared between when this work was written and when it is read. Neither the publisher nor authors shall be liable for any loss of profit or any other commercial damages, including but not limited to special, incidental, consequential, or other damages.

For general information on our other products and services or for technical support, please contact our Customer Care Department within the United States at [phone], outside the United States at [phone] or fax [phone].

Wiley also publishes its books in a variety of electronic formats. Some content that appears in print may not be available in electronic formats. For more information about Wiley products, visit our web site at www.wiley.com.

Library of Congress Control Number is Available

Cover Art and Design: Anastasiia MatviienkoAuthor Photo: Lindsey Gerstner Photography

To the guy who is the best decision I've ever made:Scott, my best friend, the embodiment of humility,unwavering support, and the best husband and dadI've ever seen. Pinch me.

Author's Note

Names and identifying details of certain individuals mentioned in this book have been changed to protect their privacy.

Foreword

by Brian D. Ray, Ph.D.

Christy-Faith, in Homeschool Rising, goes near-surface, mid-depth, and deep in a balanced symphony that will engage and enhance the palate of every reader. The story line and history lesson simmers, rumbles, crescendos, and resolves, if you will read, listen, and heed. Are you a doubter of homeschooling? A negative critic? An enthusiast? Or one on the fence? Whichever you are, this book is for you. It is really a book about philosophy, practice, and thinking on the education of children and adults, despite its focus on parent-directed family-based education.

I was educated at home and in 12 years of Roman Catholic schools. I was an eager learner and an academic achiever and went on to a B.S. in biology, an M.S. in zoology, a state-issued teaching certificate, teaching in private and public schools, and then on to a Ph.D. in science education. After that, undergraduate and graduate college/university teaching in sciences, research methodology, statistics, and the philosophy of education. I have taught hundreds of homeschool, public school, and private school students. Oh, and by the way, I have spent 39 years studying, doing research on, and publishing scholarly articles and books on homeschoolers and the home-education movement. I have been a part of many meetings and conferences within the homeschool community. Let me tell you, Christy-Faith hits it out of the ballpark with this book at every turn of the page.

Christy-Faith was institutionally schooled. She and her husband ran an education business helping children, of typically wealthy families, achieve, learn, and succeed in schools. Then they had an educational conversion experience and had their eyes opened about all manner of things education. Christy-Faith is witty and insightful. Her writing will grab you.

Homeschool Rising covers—respectfully, with gravitas, with grace, with careful circumspection, and without either sugar-coating or damaging the name and promises of parent-led home-based education—all the important topics. Christy-Faith plumbs the depths of many of the great names of the modern homeschool movement. She covers the pioneers and current important figures and their essential ideas. Christy-Faith gives attestation to and offers her readers the kernels of foresight and wisdom of these men and women. And she does it in a culturally relevant and engaging way for those living today. At the same time, her approach is timeless.

Christy-Faith also provides her readers the most current empirical evidence on this old and new form of education, homeschooling. Whether it is children's academic achievement, social and emotional development, the joy and love of learning, or their relative success in adulthood, Christy-Faith lays out the scholarly research findings in a fair and balanced way that will satisfy the academic in you.

A key thing that I appreciate about Homeschool Rising is that it does not leave its readers with a lackadaisical or nonchalant attitude of whatever, or what will be, will be. Is there good in the world? Is there anything noble? Is there anything about which we should think deeply? Does all of this relate to the education of our children? Do I truly believe that my children's education is at the core of life and I will give all that I can to it? Or, will I just jump on the cultural bandwagon and send him or her off to some conventional institutional school or some new alternative schooling (e.g., pod, micro school, tax-funded school at home, online virtual school, you name it) that is essentially under the grand influence, authority, and relationship of the government or some private group that is not related to my children? Christy-Faith will not let her readers off the hook on this one.

Does all of this really matter? Christy-Faith starts with and brings her readers to a resounding, YES! That is, dads and moms, grandparents, policymakers, professional educators, and everyday neighbors to everyday families must face the often-ignored fundamental realities about the educational upbringing of children. The education of children is crucial to the core of any family, community, society, and nation.

Christy-Faith encourages her readers to question the practice and authority of the normal way today. Ask how we got to the point of over 99.5% of children by the 1970s in the United States being taught, trained, and indoctrinated in institutional schools outside of any authentic influence of the parents and family. Question the expertise of the alleged experts. Dig deep into your own history and experiences with schooling. Look at this in light of the history of institutional schooling in other nations and the United States. Care more about your child's deep current and future life and learning than society's default setting, and open your eyes and ears to hear and understand why homeschooling is rising.

Christy-Faith comes from outside and now inside the homeschool movement and community. I learned from her that there are younger people like the pioneers of this 40-year-old, history-changing movement called “homeschooling,” and she is one of them. Christy-Faith's multifaceted experience and insights are just what the world needs right now when it comes to understanding and appreciating parent-led family-based education. Whether you want to just dip your toes into the discussion or go deep, you will be glad you read this. And her book will stand the test of time.

Homeschool Rising, with Christy-Faith, will poke you, prod you, make you laugh, and bring you to face your deepest thoughts about education and schooling. She offers you anecdotes, empirical evidence, and emotional draws. Parent, doubter, enthusiast, and fence-sitter—Christy-Faith will educate, enlighten, and edify you if you will open a little crack of space in your mind and heart and let her in with Homeschool Rising.

Dr. Brian D. Ray, founder and president of the

National Home Education Research Institute

October 3, 2023

PART ONERethinking Childhood

CHAPTER ONEThe Most Dangerous Question: What Makes for a Great Education?

“To think critically, people must be motivated and free to voice their own ideas and to raise their own questions but in school students learn that their own ideas and questions don't count. What counts are their abilities to provide the correct answers to questions that they did not ask and that do not interest them.”

—Peter Gray, from his book Free to Learn1

“Dad, puh-leeze!”

My 16-year-old self was screaming inside. I was struggling in physics, had a test tomorrow, and my grade was currently a B. Yes, the scarlet letter in my book: a B.

I had reached the limit of my own capacities and needed help. Kinematics was hard and I hate to admit this, but I hadn't even earned that B. I cheated my way there and finally reached the point where I could no longer fake it. I was in dire straits. After all, my GPA was at stake (a.k.a my whole future), and I needed help.

In comes Dad. Now, let me provide some context first. My dad isn't “normal.” He's an actual genius, an engineer (more accurately, an inventor) who's won many awards for what comes out of his mind. He's the curious type when it comes to learning.

When I asked for help, I knew I needed to contain the situation because (cue the eye roll that didn't appreciate it at the time) he was going to become enthused about how cool kinematics is, start explaining superfluous abstractions and applications, and add on a side of tangents that would confuse even the kids I was cheating off of. We had to stay on track if I wanted ACTUAL help.

“The test, Dad … the test is TOMORROW! I don't need to know all this! Just tell me what I need to know to score well.”

In that moment, the last thing I truly cared about was why this material matters, why it's interesting, and how it applies to our world. It was crunch time. To be completely honest, even if my transcripts weren't on the verge of becoming a complete dumpster fire (I did tend to catastrophize back then), I found myself utterly indifferent toward the subject matter. I knew I was never going to use this stuff again in my life. I was only taking the class to fulfill college prerequisites.

Understanding physics was my lowest priority; getting the grade in physics was the highest. That's the whole point anyway, isn't it? To play the game, get the grades, so you can get where you want to go? Of course, it is.

Chasing Grades

Through the years, I've seen this letter grade–chase play out over and over again. As the founder of one of L.A.'s most prominent learning centers, I remember having that conversation hundreds of times. A parent would hire our team to tutor their child. We would have only 50 minutes to work together, so the questions quickly became, “What do you need to know? What does the teacher want? How are we going to give them what they want to nail the right grade?”

Any excitement, interest, or even discussion about the material was nonexistent. Out the window. There was no time for anything but delivering what the teacher wanted.

It's the nonstop treadmill of grades and academic achievement (honor roll, anyone?) with the exhausting chase of looking perfect on your transcript for your dream colleges. The undercurrent of this letter grade–driven madness is anxiety, peer pressure, bullying, wearing the right clothes, the social environment, gobs of insecurities, and real dangers kids face in the traditional schooling system every single day.

The undercurrent of this grade-driven madness is anxiety, peer pressure, bullying, and real dangers kids face in the school system school every single day.

How would I know? This was my story. Grades were everything to me growing up. I should clarify, though. Grades were everything for me starting in the fourth grade. Before that, I was a completely different girl.

The Dawn of Grade Perfectionism (and Performance Anxiety)

It wasn't until fourth grade that I even knew grades were a thing. I was given tests and didn't know it. I thought school was where you go to learn if you wanted to but no big deal either way. My older sister had profound learning challenges and my parents never spoke of grades in the house.

Educating my sister and navigating the school system during a time (the 1980s) when most administrators and teachers did not believe learning disabilities were real was an uphill battle. Getting my sister to learn was a constant trial, and the last thing my parents wanted to do was talk about grades around my sister. She was in and out of therapies for most of her childhood.

But one day, things changed.

My fourth-grade teacher told my mom in a parent-teacher conference that I was very smart but not living up to my potential. Apparently, I was getting Cs (I had no idea). Nor did I even know I was graded at this thing called school. But apparently, I was a smart girl who could be doing better. Or so my parents were told.

My parents did what most parents would do when confronted with this situation. They sat me down and told me I needed to get better grades. They showed me my report card (the first time I'd ever seen one) and told me Cs meant “average” and that I was capable of a lot better. That I could be getting As if I tried, and that A is the best grade.

They then laid out a plan to motivate me to get better grades. Money. That was it.

Apparently, they were right, I wasn't working to my potential because from that day forward, I got those As. Heck, yeah, I did. We didn't have a lot of money back then so to have cash was amazing. Here's how our deal went: if I went up a grade (so if I took a C to a B), I got $20, and once I got that to an A, I would get $20 for keeping every A. My parents were not wealthy by any means, so I know that cash ($100 bucks give or take) every quarter was a lot for them. Overnight I became the student every teacher and parent wants. A straight-A poster child.

From. That. Day. Forward.

The Problem with the Plan

As I got older, though, what started as a rather innocent motivation for money turned into unhealthy perfectionism. I started to get praised for being smart by my parents and teachers, I started comparing my grades with my friends, and I started to tie my self-worth to my marks. Get the A? That means you're smart.

That means your teachers will like you. That means your parents will praise you to their friends. That means you are worthy.

I learned how to perform and deliver. I was doing this childhood thing correctly. My parents loved seeing my accomplishments, but I took this expectation to an unhealthy place. Why not? My school and teachers raved about my academic success. Applause is addicting, especially when you're great at playing to the judges.

This concept held tight as I entered the realms of college and graduate school. The objective was clear-cut: emerge from academia with an unblemished 4.0. It wasn't merely about showcasing intelligence; it was about securing the elusive key to unlocking my aspirations. Yet, beneath the surface of high grades, a more profound truth was taking shape. Behind the veil of flawlessness, there resided a girl carrying hidden scars, driven by an unspoken belief that perfect grades could mend the internal wounds.

In the midst of this narrative unfolding, my experience is far from isolated. What transpired in my journey resonates broadly among children who grapple not only with the pursuit of acceptance, but also with the subtle messages our education system imparts. This yearning runs deep, interwoven into the very fabric of our schools. It's nurtured by the notion that tangible achievements hold the key to future success. Within this intricate choreography, classrooms transform into stages, with assignments and tests as avenues to stand out, to matter. Beneath the pursuit of grades lies a delicate reality: the longing for self-worth entwined with external success. It's a narrative extending beyond my own, painting a poignant image of countless children seeking validation through academic accomplishments.

Back in fourth grade, I couldn't foresee this trajectory unfolding. At that moment, I was simply thrilled about the monetary reward. Little did I know, there was a lot more tied to those good grades. But in retrospect, something shifted within me during that fourth-grade encounter. Learning, with which admittedly I had only maintained a casual relationship until then, suddenly lost its significance.

Beneath the pursuit of grades lies a delicate reality: the longing for self-worth entwined with external success.

Following that meeting with my parents, I found myself spending the subsequent years of my academic journey being more interested in the act of securing good grades than in the actual material I was learning. The only “connections and deep thoughts” that mattered were the ones that impressed teachers, professors, and graduate advisors—all in the pursuit of securing that coveted grade. It wasn't about genuine engagement; it was about achieving the paper that validated an A, honors, or a Master's degree. I held the conviction that having those grades or that degree was a testament to my accomplishments, my knowledge, or more precisely, my identity.

Sad. Oh, how misinformed I was.

Perpetuating the Cycle

I carried this mentality into my adult years. I got a teaching job at a school in a wealthy area where the parents, too, cared about achievement. It was a match made in heaven. A driven type-A academic teacher pursuing her Master's teaching the kids of other “high achievers” how to go places.

Don't get me wrong, while growing up, I did have those occasional moments of true enthusiasm for learning that everyone desires. This is precisely why I chose a history degree over a possibly more lucrative career path. The idea that actual stories can be even more astonishing than fiction, along with the boundless wisdom we can gather by exploring the past, struck a chord with me.

Nonetheless, catching a glimpse of that “love of learning” within my studies was a rarity, as bunny trails were infrequent, and time was often limited. Such moments were only permitted (both by my choice and the unyielding demands of the system) if they aligned with my overarching goals—achieving top grades in pursuit of success.

As Denise Pope would say, throughout my years of studies I was “doing school,”2 not really engaging or enjoying learning.

Fast-forward a decade.

I became so skilled at achieving, and I married a similarly driven achiever, Scott, which led us to build a flourishing business centered on children's accomplishments.

We helped kids who struggled to “achieve” when the schools failed them. We were hired to solve problems the public and private schools could not.

We did whatever it took to deliver. To get kids on track. To get them to learn. And we were good at it too. Our center was also different from many other learning centers in that we truly cared about each and every one of those kids who walked through our doors. Make no mistake, we were hired to get results, but at the same time, I was still the little sister to a girl who struggled tremendously to be able to learn. I wanted to help. Kids who came to us knew they were in a safe place, and we genuinely cared about helping them.

What if there is a better, healthier way to get this education thing done?

We worked with thousands of kids ranging from kindergarten through college from over 20 public and 30 private schools in our area. I spent my days training and managing my staff of specialists and tutors, pouring over Individualized Education Programs (IEPs), and discussing student needs with principals, admissions counselors, therapists, psychologists, and parents. We delivered highly individualized educational plans and impressive academic outcomes.

But … this wasn't my calling. There was more in store for me. After having my first child, I had an awakening. Through a series of conversations, tough introspection, and placing on the altar of uncertainty everything I thought I knew about education, it all came down to one key question: “What if there is a better, healthier way to get this education thing done?”

My Deconstruction Begins

I observed and participated in this grind that most kids in our country are forced to experience for decades. Go to school for seven hours a day just to come home and do several hours of homework in the evenings. When they're not doing homework, kids are shuttled around to adult-led extracurricular activities (organized sports are not play, by the way). Often, these kids leave their house at 7 a.m. and don't return until 7 p.m. or even later. Kids would show up at our center, dinners in hand, with their parents telling us, “Call us when they're done!” Looking around at our center with all these kids, while holding my own infant, I wondered, “Is this the future I want for my kid? This grind?”

In this pivotal moment of deconstruction, a torrent of questions flooded my thoughts: “What kind of childhood is being shaped here? What exactly propels our actions? Do our efforts genuinely make a difference, and if so, do they address what truly matters? Amid these pursuits, do these students experience moments of genuine joy? Can they carve out time for cherished family bonds? Are their passions acknowledged and embraced, or does the ceaseless pace of their lives obstruct such pursuits?”

The scales started lifting from my eyes. I was heartbroken that kids in my center with real learning challenges were at school all day just to be at tutoring and/or receiving remediations all night. Not to mention weekends. Throughout the day, at school, many of our students received signals that something was wrong with them or they were not smart enough or “needing extra help.” Just to succeed they would come to our center after school and spend hours working with us to ensure they made decent grades. We also had the overachievers who needed As and came to us for AP Bio, Honors English (or whatever) so they could maintain their GPA to get that golden ticket of an acceptance letter from the school they “needed” to get into.

That awakening would forever change the trajectory of my life. Like, FOREVER. It led us to move states away and sell the business Scott and I built for over 17 years.

Finding Hope in Unexpected Places

As I mentioned before, we worked with a lot of kids at our center. Most students, if not all, were “doing school” to get it over with.3 I can count on one hand the kids who actually loved learning. Most everyone else—and I would argue this is true all across our country—views school as a necessary inconvenience. So many of our clients, kids and adults included, knew that much of what is learned in school has no relevance to real life.

Public school, private school, it doesn't matter; education in this country has largely been reduced to “going through the motions.”

Education has largely been reduced to “going through the motions.”

What if we could do better? What if our kids could truly love learning AND be prepared for a successful life? What if we didn't have to choose one or the other? What if there is a better way than conforming to a system that many would agree is “smoke and mirrors”? What if we did something instead of watching as critical thinking and autonomy are further devalued?

That's where we brought in the two questions that inspired us to sell our business, relocate, and pursue homeschooling.

What makes for a great education?

Are schools achieving this?

Yikes.

The implications of pondering these questions are weighty. Just how big of a problem do we have on our hands?

And what does this have to do with homeschooling? Everything. Just sit tight.

And I know what you're thinking …

“Sure, Christy, you may be able to convince me that homeschooling is a great option for families, but not everyone can homeschool.”

Yes. I know.

And I will add to that …

Not everyone should homeschool.

That doesn't mean it's not a worthy topic to ponder, and possibly one of the most important matters to think about. After all, we are talking about childhoods here. Where the majority of our kids spend seven-plus hours a day for 13 years straight. Ask any therapist and they will tell you that the childhood years, interactions with caregivers, parents, and their environments have a lasting impact on a child's emotional, social, and cognitive development. To raise children into healthy adults, it's crucial that they are provided with a safe, nurturing environment as they are growing up.

It's having the courage to truly ask ourselves, “This may be normal, but is this ‘normal’ good?”

Frederick Douglass spoke to the heart of the matter, “It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.”4

That's what this book is about: rethinking childhood. Rather than accepting common practices as the right way to do things, instead, we're taking an inventory of our kids’ growing up and being educated experiences. It's having the courage to truly ask ourselves, “This may be normal, but is this ‘normal’ good?”

The normal childhood in our culture is to send our kids away from their homes and into classrooms for seven-plus hours a day, five days a week until they are 18. To a place most kids hate.5 To a place that often kills a love of learning (more on this later) and is unhealthy at best and toxic at worst socially (more on that later, too). We hand our kids over to people we don't know that well for a large majority of their growing-up years, for hours on end, and aren't allowed to see our children without permission. Yet, we don't think twice.

The irony is, most of our culture has zero hesitation when passively sending their children into this system every single day. After all, our kids need an education. And our government knows what they're doing so we can trust them to do it, right? A considerable number of people wish to believe that our government possesses the insight to champion our welfare and make prudent decisions for us, particularly in matters concerning our children's education. Nevertheless, the reality that many of us acknowledge is that this hope rests on an inherently unrealistic premise.

These are our kids. Our precious children.

You wouldn't let just anyone access your bank account without your approval, and yet, you're supposed to just give your kids over to complete strangers for 13 years!