Sasha, the new messiah E-Book

P. F. David

• Herausgeber: novum publishing
• Kategorie: Gesellschafts- und Liebesromane
• Sprache: Englisch

Seitenzahl: 461

Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2025

Beschreibung

Sasha from London is an intersex person who co-founds the innovative movement Shaanti with schoolmate Arthur. Soon this mission becomes a course with tough obstacles. When Sasha manages to resurrect a dead man in a "miraculous" way, it is the trigger to make Shaanti a huge success in the United Kingdom. The movement aims to address the dissatisfaction many citizens have with the existing social model through items such as healthy lifestyles, the development of cultured meat and sustainable economics. Opponents try to change Sasha's mind through violence and kidnapping. When this fails, someone comes up with the idea of shooting Sasha ...

Leseprobe

1

"Honey, I had a very strange dream!"

Somewhat upset, Naomi told her story. Now, Daniel was quite used to things when it came to his girlfriend's nocturnal adventures. He was regularly awakened at a lousy hour by a muffled cry. The next morning she would tell of a chase in which she barely made headway; as if she were running with lead in her legs. Another time she was sucked slowly into a swamp. Then again, an invisible hand pushed her to the edge of a cliff. In short: threats and all that jazz.

"God has spoken to me!"

"Wow, I'm upside down!"

Daniel couldn't hide an ironic laugh.

"But you know what was so weird? That figure didn't look like God at all!"

"Then how do you know it was him?"

"That's how the person introduced himself. Looked like a young person. I can't even tell if it was a man or a woman. Black hair to just above the shoulders. Slightly wavy. With a friendly face. Caramel-colored skin. And remarkably dressed: white T-shirt, white long pants and white sneakers."

"Just goes to show that most dreams are deceptive. You do know that God looks like an old white man with a long beard."

"Yes, that's why I thought it was so strange ... and he told me he was going to come see me again soon."

"Ha, you are God's chosen one! I get stiff competition, I hear!"

Daniel said it with an unconcealed grin. However, his sense of humor had been at an all-time low. He and hisgirlfriend had been trying to get pregnant for three years. However, it just wouldn't work out. It was beginning to weigh on the couple.

Making love hadn't been fun for a long time. He had to recharge himself mentally every time. The worry of staying physically fine as well.

Fortunately, he had a great libido by nature. Always joked that it was because of his African roots. Father was a Ghanaian exchange student who had met a London girl at the University of Law in London Bloomsbury.

Kofi and Lisa. Love at second sight. He had to be patient. Demonstrate that the young woman was not primarily a trophy to show off. Or served as leverage to find the right roads in England faster.

Once they gained that trust, they became a close couple. Find work first and then they could settle down. They would would keep it to one child. Destined to be pampered. That way they had plenty of time for themselves.

A wrenching event it was. Daniel's older sister died of premature birth. A year later, Lisa became pregnant again. This child was to be the balm on the wound. As a young man, he struggled with this fact. He might as well not have existed. If the little sister had continued to live, he would have simply been stuck in eternal nothingness. Oppressive thought.

In the end, he embraced the situation. Considered that after all, every human being was the result of a twist of fate.

Half past midnight. He left for the law firm. Was known as a driven specialist in financial law. A lot of large companies had already used his services.

Naomi pulled into her office fifteen minutes later. In her own home. Together they had set up a nice room for her on the ground floor. She derived great satisfaction from her work as an independent psychotherapist.

Her daddy Aadi had come to London from India as a young ICT specialist. The London School of Science & Technology had offered him a job. While visiting a café, he had met her mom Maureen. After two years, they were married. Life smiled upon them. Still, there was a great loss: the lack of a child. Research had shown that she only very occasionally ovulated. After several IVF treatments, they finally succeeded. Naomi made their happiness complete.

But now, for Naomi and Daniel, there was that obstacle course toward pregnancy. Going to congratulate friends who could soon welcome their first baby. Gnawing frustration camouflaged by a smile.

And with some, it went like a piece of cake! Within a couple, the woman became pregnant while still on the pill. You can never be 100 percent sure about the pill, but still. The beautiful nature that showed its harsh side. With sadistic traits.

For a long time, Naomi remained fairly zen. They were both just past their thirties, so they still had some promising years ahead of them. But now it was bound to happen.

Surely the dreaded question had been asked several times by now. "And ... when will you have a baby?" A few years ago they got away with the excuse: "When we are in our thirties." That limit was behind them.

Higher frequency of moments of tension. Insecurity, then, had undermined her Buddhist serenity after all. A sock lying around could easily trigger a verbal mud fight. To protect their relationship, reconciliation had to be initiated in the evening at the latest. That was the deal. At times embellished with a love game. Turned necessity into a virtue. That way their lives hobbled on.

Until that morning.

"Daniel, it's that time again! Once again I have had a dream with the one who calls himself God. That was also announced last time."

"And what did he have to report?"

"That I would soon become pregnant with you. But it would be a special child. With a mission for this world."

"So the successor of Jesus. The new Savior, haha!"

"It all seemed so real. It didn't feel forced, rather pleasant."

"Now I'm really curious anyway."

"Wait and see."

Daniel had his reservations about these particular dreams of Naomi. He blamed it on her religious nature. She did not go to church, but strongly believed in a personal God. Daniël himself was a convinced atheist. Since they once had a heated argument about it, he tried to avoid the subject. Had been browsing the Internet and came across the site of a religious psychologist. There he could read that religious people are more prone to dreams in which saints, deceased persons and even God appear.

Both were absorbed in their jobs. Working hard to suppress personal besognes. Naomi was now treating a girl who demanded her attention fiercely. Didn't realize that this case would be an eye opener for herself as well. Tessa was only in first grade and the teacher didn't know what to do with her. She was sent to the care teacher. But she, too, had difficulty getting a grip.

A conversation with the parents did not bring much relief either. The child appeared to be quite quiet at home and caused few problems.

This is how the child came to Naomi. After the necessary conversations, tests and observations, the not unexpected verdict fell: ADHD was the culprit.

At first, the parents repeated what they had told at school: nothing was wrong at home. But Naomi had her doubts about that explanation. She made it clear to the parents that they had to be honest. It was the only way to come up with a proper treatment plan to give their daughter a better future.

It was reluctantly admitted that Tessa exhibited similar behavior at home as at school. Out of shame, theyhad lied during the conversation with the teachers in an attempt to shrug off responsibility that way.

Not without hesitation, they confessed that the child was being yelled at too often. The focus was always on her negative behavior. The times she showed good behavior, it was usually passed by carelessly, without reward.

The change of approach proved to be a tough homework for the parents. After a few weeks, improvement was noticeable at home. Naomi was able to convince the mom and dad to make an appointment with the class teacher again and make confessions. To her mild surprise, they agreed. Without grumbling. A good week later came the feedback. The teachers had shown understanding. Tessa's attitude was improving. In short, things were spiraling upward. Naomi drew great satisfaction from this. But the parents had unwittingly held up a mirror to her: it is liberating to be able to say things as they are.

She decided that in the future she would simply tell her friends the truth about the fact that she didn’t get pregnant. In the evening, she told her conclusion to Daniel.

"Honey, I've been thinking about it. Shouldn't we let go of the pregnancy? It will kill both of us in the long run."

"I told you the same thing last year. But then you didn't want to know about it."

"I know, but I just wasn't ready. You have to understand that."

"Yeah ..., sure I get it."

Daniel muttered somewhat annoyed. With an undertone of: finally she understood.

"You know what, Naomi? Despite everything, I have a feeling it's going to work out. Sooner or later we're going to succeed. And especially you!"

"What do you mean?"

"You just happen to be better at getting pregnant than I am!"

"Lame joke!"

Some men would think it odd, but he didn't mind the sex frequency making a downward curve. Less forced sex. Eros visited a little less, butwas more welcome as a result. Finally the pressure to perform was dropping. The realization that evenings could also be fun without forced genital excitement.

Life went on as usual, but not quite undisturbed. They could not resist arguing sometimes. The result of a process of emotional discharge. Sometimes on the edge. Fortunately, each time the wiedergutmachung.

The routine in the relationship was not necessarily detrimental. Decompression after a stressful period of: we have to get pregnant, have to keep up appearances, have to be busy, have to relax, and so on.

"Don't look, eyes closed!"

Daniel just watched Naomi enter the parlor with her hands behind her back. He had only just taken full possession of the seat. Looking for relaxation mode. Reading the newspaper on the tablet. Putting it off for a while. All right then. With a forced smile, his eyelids lowered. However she knew he wasn't fond of surprises. She loved them all the more.

"Eyes open!"

Ten inches from his nose, a predictor hovered between thumb and forefinger. The little screen unequivocally read the word: pregnant.

"You're serious!"

That's all that came out.

"Daniel, we are having a child!"

He looked straight into two happy eyes, covered with a moist veil of happiness. A slight odor of sweat wafted toward him. The result of her excitement.

There was that immediate realization that his life would never be the same again. How, though, was not entirely clear. A vague sense of responsibility shuffled into his brain.

In Naomi's mind there was a ping-pong game going on: shreds of doubt versus waves of happiness. Unexpected but highly desired new life was on the way at 7C Black Walnut Street.

What a relief! Finally done with the hankering of friends for joyous news. At last! Naomi could now make her own happy announcement. In her mind she could already hear the delighted voices of excited friends.

"The hell it did by releasing that compulsive thought," Daniel muttered. He shook his head. Hardly comprehended.

"You will have to be kind to me and accept my quirks!"

"As long as you don't overdo it. Don't expect me to cook whatever you're craving at night before bed."

Naomi pouted indignantly.

"When Cindy was pregnant, Tony ran to the night store in the dead of night to buy her a goblet of pickles! That's what I call true love!"

"Okay, you win. Tell you what, I'm going to stock up on five jars of pickles next week."

"But you know I don't like that!"

"Apparently, pregnant women get cravings for the strangest things. And besides, I can eat them myself. Just kidding."

"And we still have so much to do: appointment with the gynecologist, decorating the nursery, buying baby gear!"

"Stay calm, honey! You have to think of your own health and that of the baby now, too. You know it's not okay for you to rush. Let's start at the beginning: contact a gynecologist first."

"Yes, I know, you're right. I think I'm going to take the same one from Cindy: Dr. Reynolds. She was very pleased with that one. She is straightforward and competent. I like someone who takes the bull by the horns. And as a woman, she also has an eye for our sensitivities."

"An almost perfect lady, then. Just like you ..."

"You can't bully pregnant women!"

In the evening on the couch, the first intense emotions had subsided a bit. Daniel was eager to broach a sensitive subject. After all, they had agreed not to shy away from difficult topics.

"Honey, I don't know if it's appropriate, but um ..., what about sex?"

"Oh, we certainly shouldn't drop that entirely. If you're careful, we can still do as usual. At the beginning of my pregnancy anyway."

This answer the father-to-be had not expected. And somewhere he had also resigned himself to the fact that it would be a lot less from now on for a little year.

"You're a man and I do understand your needs. But I think I'm going to need that myself from time to time. I want you to start paying more attention to my G-spot again."

"Don't forget that you are the one who has spent the last few years making sex the main focus of getting pregnant. You know all too well that I've continued to play that spot, but your desire for a child seemed to block things out."

"I know, you're right. But now I'm pregnant! I want to enjoy myself again! Cindy had sex until shortly before giving birth and she claimed it was very pleasant for both of them. It was mostly a bit of watching out and being careful."

Daniel didn't know what he was hearing. In his head a chorus of angels chanted hallelujah.

"Whew, luckily, I feared your G-spot was going to be a no-go zone for the next year."

"No, no, I've read some things about it too. An orgasm is safe for the baby. That way, the uterus is already practicing contractions in preparation for labor. The hormone for that can even make the orgasm more intense. Now if we went to bed a little earlier. Then maybe we could euh ... try something?"

Daniel didn't let it get cold and accepted the proposal with a smile. In a day's time, life looked a lot spicier.

"I also don't want you to think about going on another one!"

"Did you really think I was ...?"

"Yes, no, but you hear that more often anyway that some men cheat during their wife's pregnancy."

"I wouldn't do that anyway!"

"Yes, I do trust you. But when you get your way with me, it's okay right?"

"Listen, if necessary, there is also such a thing as masturbation. I've gotten a lot of euh ... satisfaction out of that in the past."

They both laughed about it. Naomi was apparently in good spirits.

"Listen Daniel, when you take good care of me over the next few months, I will pamper you too."

Naomi rubbed his mouth sensuously with her index finger. Talking turned to whispers.

"You go ahead and start warming me up."

Daniel slowly sabbed her left earlobe. The start was promising. Unconsciously, she sniffed his pheromones. Which then bombarded her pituitary gland with horny stimuli. Then they did their thing with some caution. Finally, gradually working toward the final. Daniel crossed the line cheering.

With Naomi, he wasn't always sure. Her moans often seemed to support his final chants. But girls are different from boys and every woman is different. Some scream the neighbors awake and others experience a longer drawn out sweet form of satisfaction. Over the next few days, they lingered in light euphoria. They decided to wait a little longer to inform family and friends. After all, anything could still go wrong.

They didn’t want to think about that.

A few days later, on a Saturday morning, Daniel received an unexpected phone call from his father. Bad news. His mother had suffered a cerebral infarction shortly before. Kofi called from the hospital. The good news was that the prognosis was quite favorable. She had not suffered any severe physical disability. The right arm did cause some concern. And it remained to be seen what the mental consequences would be.

How cruel could fate be? His parents had barely been retired for six months. Kofi and Lisa had graduated togetheras lawyers and had decided to fully enjoy their retirement together. He promised his father to come to the hospital in their hometown of Woolwich that same morning.

From Bankside, it was only a good twenty minutes away by car. He gently informed Naomi. She responded shocked to this unpleasant news. Or at least made an effort.

"Now go and be careful!"

Daniel gave her an absent-minded kiss and left.

Naomi had a rather strained relationship with her mother-in-law. Let's just say they could tolerate each other. But there was always some kind of unpleasant tension. Daniel, as an only child, was the apple of her eye, and that fact was exacerbated by the unfortunate death of his sister at birth. Was there actually a woman who would be good enough for her son? And she couldn't resist to make a snide comment on occasion. Naomi remembered all too well a visit during the summer.

She is wearing a sexy short skirt. She does it mostly for Daniel. Then naughty lights begin to flash in his eyes. When she is alone with Lisa for a moment, the latter says out of the blue, "You should be careful dressing like that anyway. You also attract the attention of the wrong men that way." With a stern look in her eyes. Apparently she can’t say anything good about her daughter-in-law. The latter can make do with that. When she talks to Daniel about it, he understands her.

"I'll talk to mom about it."

"No honey, don't! Promise me that. She'll hate me even more."

"Okay. But know that I am always willing, when it becomes too much for you. I also do appreciate that you're not too quick to confront."

"I'm doing my best. But I can't assure you it will stay that way."

With Kofi, her father-in-law, she did have a cordial relationship. Why do people so often have problems with their mother-in-law? Daniel, on the other hand, got along well with her parents Aadi and Maureen. The men sometimes played a game on the tennis court in the summer. So in Lewisham, they did visit more often.

But this news did put a damper on the joy. Especially for Daniel. Too bad, this was supposed to be a happy time.

In the late afternoon, Daniel returned home. With the countenance of gloom. Yet it was not all doom and sadness.

"I talked to the doctor. The outlook - all things considered - is relatively favorable. She will probably recover for the most part. But she will tire mentally and physically faster. And as mentioned, the right arm is still causing some concern. She can barely raise it. But targeted therapy should bring improvement. She may become more sensitive to light and sound stimuli. Possibly her behavior may even change."

"Then I hope she will behave differently toward me. What does your daddy say about it?"

"He realizes all too well that their lives will never be the same. He will also have to help out more often in the household. But he was comfortable with that. How else could it have looked with a little more bad luck? I can't bear to think about it. A stroke of luck that they are both retired. He now has more time to do household chores. He has already mentioned that he will have to iron for the first time in his life. I told him that when he wanted to, you would be willing to teach him."

"For him, I would be happy to do that."

"He thanked me for the offer and said that surely I should know what a proud woman Mom was. That she was not going to want to leave that to anyone else. No doubt she would want to come up beside him and give instructions on every action."

"And she certainly wouldn't tolerate me doing that. Me, her beloved daughter-in-law."

"Yes, I know."

"How long will she have to stay in the hospital?"

"When nothing intervenes, another three days, the doctor said."

"Three days, that actually doesn't seem that long for a cerebral hemorrhage."

"No, it's acerebral infarction. With a cerebral hemorrhage, blood gets into the brain and that can lead to more problems. Sometimes it requires surgery to remove the blood."

"But a cerebral infarction; how do you get something like that? Should I start getting scared too?"

"According to the doctor, it's because of high blood pressure. Mom has suffered from that for as long as I've known. High blood pressure can cause narrowing in the carotid artery. This is called arteriosclerosis. Then clots can form there that shoot through to the brain and clog a blood vessel there."

"What kinds of diseases a person can get!"

"Tomorrow we should visit together."

"Maybe best that way, because otherwise I'll get comments again. One thing you must promise me!"

"And that is?"

"That you're not saying anything about the pregnancy yet. We have to be sure first."

"Yes, I do."

"Most miscarriages occur between two and three months. So I suggest waiting about two and a half months."

"Are you going to be able to do that, keep your mouth shut for that long?"

"Oh shut up, I hope I'm not going to slip up."

The next day in the early evening they entered Lisa's room. Kofi, of course, was already there. Daniel immediately went up to his mother and kissed her. Naomi was in doubt for a moment. What should she do? In a split second, she decided to give a fleeting kiss anyway. With some reluctance, but this way she could show everyone her good will once again.

"Hello Naomi."

Lisa spoke slowly and sounded tired. Daniel and Naomi had barely sat down or her father-in-law started talking and didn’t stop. He desperately needed to tell his story.

"Yes, Saturday morning she was sitting in the couch reading the newspaper. I was in the kitchen making coffee. When I came into the living room,she was sitting slumped over with her head on her chest. Unconscious. I immediately called the ambulance. They were home within ten minutes. But I can tell you it seemed like an hour."

"I believe so."

Daniel could not say more because his father immediately continued talking.

"The doctor said that fortunately we had acted quickly. Otherwise it could have been much worse. She has already had some physio. She will have to continue that at home. And she will have to continue taking blood thinners throughout her life. Otherwise there is a chance that another clot will form in her brain. And she has to eat healthy, right honey?!"

"Yes," it sounded softly.

Nothing more came out. And a tired smile. For Kofi, it was an attempt to include his wife in the conversation.

Daniel and Naomi didn't stay long. Lisa especially needed to rest and not get too many stimuli.

During the drive back, little was said. The car filled with an uncomfortable silence. Each was absorbed in their own little world. Processing mixed feelings.

Naomi was now over eight weeks pregnant. According to the gynecologist, everything went as it should. She also had no discomforts. What a blessing! If only it could stay that way. Daniel began to think aloud about the next step.

"Shouldn't we start thinking about notifying everyone?"

"Isn't that a few weeks early? We agreed to say something after three months, right?"

"Yes, but now you're starting to see it quietly, though."

"I know, but when I wear a looser dress, it still goes just fine."

"You don't want someone to make a comment and get ahead of you, do you? And Dr. Reynolds said she's very confident!"

"Okay, then it has to happen this weekend. First our parents and next Wednesday Cindy and Tony are coming here."

"Friday I'm going to play mini soccer and tell my mates," he said.

Naomi's parents responded rapturously. As expected. With them, she didn't have to be wary. A home match every time. In fact, they had already resigned themselves to continuing life without grandchildren. Naomi had already told them about the difficult attempts to get pregnant. And whether Maureen knew that feeling. For her, Mother Nature had not been the smoothest of supporters either. But with the help of science, Naomi did come into their lives. Which turned out to be a blessing.

Kofi and Lisa's reactions were somewhat different. He hugged them both warmly and reiterated how he wished them this great happiness. She also kissed them, but it seemed like she was responding subdued. Somehow you could tell she was fighting an inner battle between being happy about this news and her own obvious discomfort.

Hours, days, months. Without much effort, they slipped into one another. Naomi was now eight months pregnant. She had imagined all sorts of unpleasant scenarios from the beginning. But so far, everything had gone almost flawlessly. One thing she did regret was that she never had to send Daniel to the night store at night for a big bag of bell pepper chips and a can of whipped cream. Nothing weird to tell the girlfriends. Abnormally normal.

"Daniel, I think this is it! Twenty minutes ago I had my first contraction and now I have the next one."

"Come, we're leaving for the hospital. Put on your coat! I'll put your suitcase in the car in the meantime."

"No, Dr. Reynolds said I should call her first when my contractions start coming."

"Okay, then you should do that."

Daniel could tell from the conversation that it would be best for her to wait a while longer until the contractions came on about every five minutes.

There the two of them sat on the couch. Watching the clock anxiously. The tension was affecting his intestines.

"I have to go to the toilet first."

Both laughed sheepishly. He rushed to the toilet because he didn't want to leave his girlfriend alone for a minute too long. When the contractions came every five minutes for about an hour, it was time to leave.

Her water had not yet broken, and shortly after arriving in the delivery room, the midwife pierced the membrane. Naomi now hoped to get rid of those painful cramps soon, but it still took her an incredibly long time to dilate sufficiently.

Hours of unbridled agony. Daniel stood manfully by her side. Gently squeezed her hands and spoke encouraging words. He now felt what the men he had seen on TV before in a similar situation, were going through.

"And do you have a name for the baby yet?"

During a quiet moment, the midwife tried to clear her mind for a moment.

Naomi said it was going to be Sasha. Whether it was going to be a boy or girl didn't matter. It was the only name both of them liked for a boy.

As for girls' names, they couldn't figure it out. After some research, they had figured out that the name was used for both sexes. So that would be it.

After the longest ten hours of her life, the pushing had yet to begin. Sweat beaded on her forehead. And Daniel, who didn't notice his own sweaty armpits, tried to do his best. For a moment it looked like she was going to stay in it. The midwife even suggested an epidural. This was not what Naomi wanted. She wanted to experience the birth completely naturally. No matter how painful it was going to be.

It really shouldn't be long now. Naomi was nearing exhaustion.

"Go ahead, push harder one more time! You want to become a mother, don't you?"

Daniel thought it was a somewhat strange statement. At the same time, he understood that it was a way of pushing. He assumed the woman knew what she was doing.

After an ultimate effort and an uncontrolled scream from Naomi, Sasha came into the world. As agreed, Daniel was allowed to cut the umbilical cord.

"It's a boy!"

Full of pride, he called it to Naomi. The nurse took the child over and gently placed it in Naomi's arms. Tears of happiness.

A moment later, she picked the child back up.

We are now going to wash it and do a preliminary examination. You will have to do without Sasha for a while. But don't worry, we'll bring the baby back as soon as possible.

"I have a confession to make, Daniel. Next time, I still want an epidural puncture. I don't want to go through this pain again."

"I hope so, because I'd rather not experience this again either. I can use a tranquilizer myself."

After fifteen minutes, the nurse came back into the delivery room with a colleague. Naomi looked worried.

"You didn't bring Sasha!"

"No, but don't worry, ma'am. The examination will just take a little longer than planned. We'll first take you to your room."

A while later, another nurse accompanied by a doctor entered their room.

"Sasha will be brought here in ten minutes. Initial examinations are almost complete."

The doctor spoke in a calm and confident tone.

"Your child is healthy. So as far as that is concerned, you should not worry. Nevertheless, we were able to identify a peculiarity."

For Naomi and Daniel, this felt uncomfortable.

"Your child is an intersex child. That means it has both male and female physical characteristics. We saw on the scan that it has a uterus, ovaries and a vagina.

David didn't know what he was hearing.

"But there was still a small penis visible at birth!"

"That's right sir, but what you saw is the clitoris developed into a kind of penis. We also drew blood to examine the ratio of male to female hormones and chromosomes."

"And do you have the results yet?"

Naomi asked in a slightly startled tone.

"No, it won't come in for a few days. We will send the results to gynecologist Reynolds. She will then contact you to discuss the results. She will give you any further explanation."

"Should we be worried now doctor?"

Daniel sounded troubled.

"You know, we do encounter this or a variant several times a year. It usually works out when the parents and the child are properly supervised by a psychologist. And intersex children also have to have some luck with the people they will meet. So, I'm going to move on now. I will have Sasha brought here right away. For now, don't worry too much and enjoy your child I would say."

After the doctor left, Naomi and Daniel looked at each other for seconds without saying a word.

When the sprout was finally united with the parents, a form of bliss descended upon the couple. No headaches for a moment. This moment of swooning was to be cherished. The present could not be taken away from them by anyone.

The future was uncertain.

2

How were they going to report this to family and friends? And when? Very little time was needed for the two to make a decision. They would tell every visitor honestly. No secrecy. The need to make this story unnecessarily complicated was totally lacking.

And it had to be said: sharing everything candidly was gratifying. The reactions were almost unanimously positive. Only both their parents could not hide their concern. The young parents had expected this. Their father and mother were not very familiar with the concept of intersex. To them, it was more like a fad. An expression of young people who didn't know what to do with themselves.

Naomi and Daniel, meanwhile, had also had a visit from Dr. Reynolds. She could tell them all about intersex children. And that most cases had turned out all right. They tried to get that message across to their parents as best they could. Which was somewhat successful.

Aadi and Maureen were already reasonably reassured. Kofi and especially Lisa didn't leave the room without a worried face.

Coming back home was at the same time the starting signal for a new beginning. Nothing would ever be the same again. Daniel had already resolved to do his share of work. Which meant, among other things, that he would have to get out of bed regularly at night. Now, he was fortunate to be able to get back to sleep quickly each time. For Naomi, that was a little more difficult. And an annoying side effect was that the next day, she was insufferable. And fell over from sleep.

Which inspired Daniel to propose a new compromise. He would take over much of her nights in exchangefor daytime exemptions. Change diapers a little less, for example. And after work first a nice nap. Yes, that had to work.

During their visit to Dr. Reynolds, as had been announced at the hospital, they were also told the results of the blood test. Not unexpectedly, the proportion of testosterone in the hormone levels was higher than that of an ordinary girl.

Fortunately, Sasha turned out to be a not too difficult baby who slept through most of the night after about two months.

Time went quickly. The first year of life passed without any significant problems. Like most healthy toddlers, Sasha took the first wobbly steps after a good fourteen months.

With psychologist Ann, meanwhile, they had discussed considering the child a girl. The expectation was that Sasha would continue to look boyish at least until the first menstruation around age 12. Assuming hormone levels would allow it at that point.

By then, there might be some more clarity around the young teen's feelings. So until then, Sasha would be treated and addressed as a girl. After all, the child now had a vagina and thus would go to the bathroom in girl's toilets. The clitoris that looked like a small penis could be taped with special tape when wearing tight clothing or a swimsuit.

It was a kind of proactive act to prevent bullying. After all, children remained children and could be extremely harsh toward each other. If she did experience problems with her classmates one way or another, there was a plan to then choose a high school far away from the neighborhood after elementary school. There Sasha could make a new start. New surroundings, new friends and girlfriends.

Ann explained that one of the four non-binary individuals she was currently counseling was still experiencing difficulties. Indeed, modern youth were confronted with concepts such as intersex and transgender in many ways.

Only the use of gender-neutral pronouns did not always go smoothly. A bit confusing, but important for many intersex persons.

Daniel was a bit worried anyway.

"The girlfriends are going to notice that penis-like clitoris sooner or later, aren't they? Isn't it more convenient to remove it in time?"

Naomi went along with that.

Ann's response was decided.

"I wouldn't. Intersex young people think it's super important that they can decide for themselves what happens to their bodies. I have a colleague who has an intersex person like Sasha in treatment. That person is still struggling with suicidal thoughts because the parents once decided to adjust the genitals to the sex that was most obvious. Some operations were performed to make it a full-fledged girl, so to speak. So a 'she' was made of it while that person felt both boy and girl."

For Naomi and Daniel, it was sometimes a relief to drop Sasha at the grandparents' house for a while. With Lisa and Kofi, they could do that basically any day of the week because of their retirement. As with Aadi and Maureen, but with the understanding that he was working as a high school history teacher and still had about three years ahead of him.

Maureen had always been a stay-at-home mom. She had not continued her studies after high school. She went to work full time at the café where she had been behind the bar on weekends for several years. She liked that. She was not unattractive and often received tips from young men who wanted to be in her good graces. Slightly older men also made themselves noticed. They enhanced their charms by waving extra banknotes.

And then came Aadi. He was good-looking. Cuter men had already passed the review, but this time it was ... different. He had cycled past the forest-side café several times. It was located on the edge of the beautiful Squirrel Forestjust outside central London, with the equally appropriate and original name ‘Forest Side’. Until he decided to explore the inside. Before he plopped down on a stool, it had already happened: instant crush!

How she stood there with her right elbow in her side; cigarette pinched between the slender index and middle finger. As a kind of affirmation of her free-spirited status. Back in the days when the health risks of tobacco were - so to speak - less decisive.

She had seen him ogling, but didn't show it. Put her face in the you-can't-get-me mode. But she only kept that up until she drank a pint of bitter. They got chatting and a week later they were a couple.

After a year, Aadi began to feel more and more uncomfortable knowing that his girlfriend - albeit professionally - was chatting and joking with other men. You could call it a form of jealousy. The feeling was there now and it wasn't going away.

She understood him, though. She felt that he wanted her to quit. But without him explicitly asking. Other than the one time he insinuated it anyway when he - fairly tipsy - once asked her how long she thought she could keep up this life.

So she brought it up herself. As she spoke, she saw his mood change. It went from slight surprise to relief.

"But," she said then, "I've always loved doing this, though. To be honest: other work doesn't really interest me. Yet I do want to quit because I have long since noticed, you struggle with it. That's why I want to quit."

When they finally married, she settled into the role of housewife. She was the only child of wealthy jewelers. These were relieved that their daughter had finally found love. For Aadi, of course, it was also nice that her parents largely financed their home. That way, they were basically making do with his wages. It did sometimes feel a little wrong that his parents were not so well off. But that’s just how it was.

To have some extra breathing room, he moonlighted as a bus driver at a motor coach company. Sometimes day trips on weekends and multi-day trips during school vacations. Occasionally Maureen went along. They could both enjoy that.

So the only damper on their relationship was the fact that they just couldn't get pregnant.

Something that finally, after much effort, then succeeded.

Just under a year later. As time went on, Naomi and Daniel noticed that Lisa was finding it increasingly difficult to function. Kofi had also told them that on the days when Sasha stayed, she became more tired and irritable more quickly.

It was becoming a difficult story. Daniel had already discussed it with his father. With pain in his heart, he agreed to let Sasha stay half a day or less on weekends and, in time, probably every two weeks. Staying overnight was out of the question. If Lisa's sleep was interrupted even for a moment, she was no longer tolerable the next day. What had to be done, had to be done. It was not an easy exercise for the young couple. They watched it from week to week.

Meanwhile, Sasha had grown into a hefty two-year-old toddler. The first shaky steps had already made way for running and skipping for a while. The proud grandparents noticed the progressevery week.

Naomi was not exactly cheered by her mother-in-law's behavior. In an unguarded moment, Kofi had let slip to Daniel that she had once lashed out at Sasha when she wouldn't eat a freshly made soup.

Annoyance came lurking around the corner. She urged Daniel to take the child there less often.

Ideally, she would no longer let it stay with them. However, the affection for her father-in-law was too great to push this idea through. Therefore, she decided not to insist further. More tension in her relationship she could miss like a toothache.

An average Saturday morning.

Naomi was shopping by car. Daniel sat at his desk rehearsing the details for the case he was to argue the next week.

Every once in a while, he would take a look in the living room where Sasha was trying to put together the latest puzzle: a wooden stacking pyramid painted with exotic animals. Which worked pretty well.

Ding-dong.

Daniel wondered who that could be. On Saturday mornings, they rarely got visitors. When he opened the door, he looked straight into the eyes of a policewoman. Her colleague stood beside her with a bedraggled look.

"Are you Mr. Daniel Asamoah?"

"Yes."

"And you are Ms. Naomi Khan's partner?"

"Yes."

"May we come in for a moment?"

Daniel's heart cringed. He knew from hearsay what this was supposed to mean.

His suspicions were quickly confirmed.

"We have to inform you that Naomi has been in a serious accident."

Daniel was glad he was sitting down. An indefinable woe swept through his body and he couldn't utter a word.

"She sadly passed away from her injuries. We offer you our deepest condolences."

In the few seconds he spent looking down obliquely, it flashed through his mind that he needed to be strong for Sasha. He tried to push his emotions away. He barely succeeded.

"Oh no, how can that be?" was all he could utter.

It seemed as if his own words made him dizzy himself.

"Are you okay sir?" the other agent asked worriedly.

"Yes, I'm fine."

He straightened his back.

"Where is she now?"

"She was transferred to Guy's Hospital."

"How did the accident happen?"

"Our colleagues are still at the scene investigating. It appears there was a head-on collision with a vehicle whose driver suffered a heart attack. Emergency services said she probably suffered severe internal bleeding from the impact and died almost immediately. It may be of comfort to you that she probably did not suffer."

"Can you tell me what to do next?"

"It might be best for you to drive to the hospital first. They will accommodate you there and discuss with you whether you can still greet Naomi and how to proceed."

The agent looked at Sasha.

"I see you have a baby. What's its name?"

"Sasha."

"Do you have family or a confidant you can call to look after Sasha here for as long as possible? I think it would be more convenient for you to handle such matters without the child."

"Yes, I can call my in-laws. At least I'll find someone."

The officer handed him a card with the phone number of the police victim assistance service.

"After that, you can contact our victim assistance service which will help you with any further steps you need to take. Information such as the garage the car wreck was towed to, and so on. But those are all things for afterwards. First things first. So, sir, do you have any questions?"

"No, I think I know enough."

"Then we will move on now. We wish you continued strength."

"Take good care of Sasha and yourself," complemented the other.

"I will do my best. Thank you."

As he closed the door, he felt unreal. Had this really happened now? He plopped down in the seat and stared at Sasha. The child just happily pushed over a pile of blocks and started again from scratch. Tirelessly. Unaware of any harm. Involuntarily, he felt compassion for the little child.

Daniel wondered how on earth he was going to communicate this soon to Sasha. He grew dejected at the thought. He drank a glass of water and figured he had to take action now. He decided to call his in-laws first so they could come and look after Sasha. While those were on their way, he could contact his parents. Given his mother's situation, hopefully they would understand why he had asked Aadi and Maureen to babysit.

He gathered the scraps of his courage and took out his smartphone.

At the hospital, he was well taken care of. After the explanation, Daniel asked if he could see Naomi. On the way to the room, the nurse explained. In an unctuous way. She had probably done this more than once.

"The upper part of her head is bandaged because of a wound. Her face and the rest of her body are virtually intact. This is because the injuries are mainly ín the body. In a head-on collision, the body comes to a standstill in a fraction of a second. As a result, vital organs and arteries can tear loose. And that's what happened to her."

In the hallways hung the odor of cleaning products. It was vaguely familiar to him. Arriving at the room, he felt slightly unwell, but he gritted his teeth. The nurse opened the door and led him inside.

There she lay. A mysterious calm radiated from her countenance. Totally zen. Daniel asked if he could be alone with her for a few minutes. The nurse seemed to hesitate for a moment, but then agreed anyway.

He touched her cold hand and dropped to his knees beside the bed. With his head on the sheet, he began to sob uncontrollably. All the pent-up emotions needed to get out. And that included a dose of self-pity. Human.

"I miss you. And I will do everything I can to raise our Sasha the best I can. I promise you that!"

After a while, there was a quiet knock on the door and the nurse came right in.

"Are you okay sir?"

"Yeah, I'll manage."

"If you would like to come with me? I would like to discuss a few more things."

She took him aside into another room.

"When you return home, it is best to contact a funeral director. If necessary, discuss it with your family. Once you have one, they will contact us. The director will also give you a list of all kinds of things you need to arrange. This is helpful and will give you a little more peace of mind, at least as far as the practical stuff is concerned."

"Okay, thanks for the explanation. Then I'll move on."

"Goodbye sir. I wish you good luck."

"Thank you."

By the time he returned home, Aadi and Maureen had calmed down a bit more. When he left for the hospital, they were - understandably - quite upset. Derailed emotions.

Together they arranged for a funeral director. A representative came over half an hour later to set everything up. Then his in-laws left. They agreed to keep each other informed daily.

His own parents would come by the next day.

There he sat in the couch, with his child on his lap. All sorts of thoughts whizzed through his mind. Was it an advantage or disadvantage that Sasha hadn't really known Naomi well yet? Would he ever get to know anyone else? That last thought he quickly tried to repress. How did he manage to think such a thing on the day his wife died? He was ashamed, but he couldn't help it either. He hadn't asked for the idea to enter his head so boldly.

He now desperately needed a beer to come to his senses. But first take care of the little one: feeding, washing and sleeping.

Daniel had lust to get drunk, to be away from the world. But that was not to happen. He knew why. Reason was upstairs in the cot, enjoying the sleep of the ignorant. However, he did need a quantity of comfort beer.

Slightly sedated and tipsy, he sought his bed. For a turbulent night.

The next day around ten o'clock in the morning, the bell rang. A shiver ticked through his body. Yesterday around the same time, after that same sound, two policemen were at the door. Again he looked into two bedraggled faces, but this time they were those of his parents. Kofi stood there with red-rimmed eyes. Lisa stood next to him, a little lost.

For a moment, words were superfluous.

"Come in." Daniel walked ahead to the parlor. His mother grabbed Sasha on her lap. Then she didn't have to say anything to her son for a while. Of course she was not of ill will, but she was having a very hard time finding the right words right now. An almost sleepless night didn't help her, of course. But she wanted to do her best. Daniel had enough on his mind right now. Surely he could do without the nagging of a highly sensitive mother. She mostly listened as Kofi and their son discussed the practicalities of the funeral. And Lisa would arrange for Sasha to stay with her sister on the day of the funeral.

That day Daniel lived in a sort of stupor. It felt as if he had to play himself in a movie for which he had not applied. Receiving all those condolences, he experienced as a kind of, say, assembly line work. People meant well, but it tasted like the slightly compulsive performance of pre-written rituals. Then again, what else were they supposed to do?

Aadi and Maureen both had rather conservative views on parenting. During Naomi's teenage years, they had quite a bit of trouble with their free-spirited child. However, there was nothing to do but accept it. They did not want to figuratively lose their so laboriously acquired daughter through endless bickering.

And then they literally lost her now because of such a stupid accident.

She was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. If that man had had his heart attack a few seconds later, she would probably still be alive. But then there might have been another victim. As good Christians, they struggled with these kinds of thoughts.

That evening, Kofi and Lisa went to pick up Sasha from Lisa’s sister. That way she could be back with her daddy. He needed that.

Naomi had now passed a month and Daniel was doing his best to shape his new life. During the day, Sasha was in daycare. That was going reasonably well. Still, it required quite a reorganization. He now had to manage many things on his own without feedback from a partner.

He was lucky, though, that his parents and in-laws had agreed among themselves who would do what. And when. They all had house keys. When he went to pick up Sasha in the evening and returned home, invisible hands had already been busy. In the fridge, he would find a plate of goodies hidden under foil. Only to be put in the microwave.

Somehow a form of habituation crept into this life as well. Something inside him said that sooner or later something would change. He just didn't know what or when.

A first clue came sooner than expected. One Sunday afternoon, Aadi came up with a remarkable proposal. A bit out of the blue.

"Maureen and I have spent the past week thinking and talking about your situation and Sasha's. How would you feel about moving in with us for a while?"

Daniel looked puzzled. But before he could say anything, Dad-in-law continued.

"You know that like you, we are struggling with the loss of Naomi. Therefore, insteadof having to go to daycare, it would be nice if Sasha could just stay at our home."

Daniel looked at Maureen, but she just stared ahead and said nothing. A little strange really.

He thought for a moment and then rightly remarked, "But what about our house? That's not paid off yet!"

Apparently, Aadi was expecting that comment.

"There is a lot of demand for the kind of houses in the neighborhood where you live. I think you can easily find a good tenant. Basically, the tenant will continue to pay off your loan. With us, you get to live in for free. You don't have to worry about anything before and after work, so you have all the time you need to take care of Sasha."

Daniel said he would consider the proposal. Sleep on it for a few nights and then make a decision. At first he was hesitant to do so. With all the help he was getting, he could still handle it all fairly well. But how would he feel in a few months?

After talking with his own parents, he cut the knot: he would try. However, there was one condition: he had to find suitable tenants. He had to have a good feeling about it. Get the impression that they would treat the house with respect. That he could count on being ableto return to his home later without any costs or regrets.

He had a plan in his head. In a good year and a half, Sasha would be three and going to kindergarten. The moment to return to their own home. It would have to happen sometime anyway. The longer they stayed with his in-laws, the harder it would become to leave. So he started looking for tenants who wanted to rent for that period only.

Aadi was right: there were plenty of applicants. Among them was a couple who were about to buy a house. It was not an expensive house, but there was a huge amount of remodeling to be done. To save costs, they were going to do a lot themselves. The work was going to take about a year and a half. That worked out well. These people radiated positive vibes and the deal was quickly done.

It was a bit of a search at first for all of them, but the good will was there to make something of it. Daniel had already let slip that he would probably only stay for a good year and a half.

He didn't get much of a reaction to it. His words didn't seem to get through to Maureen. Selectively hard of hearing. He sensed it couldn't last long enough for her. She had completely attached herself to the little one. Insatiable connection drive in the making.

Those were worries for later. That was what he was thinking at the time.