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- Herausgeber: Books on Demand
- Kategorie: Abenteuer, Thriller, Horror
- Sprache: Englisch
A young lady from the Scottish Highlands needs to go to the dentist. Bad enough already, but it gets worse. She falls into the clutches of an undead representative of the guild. By no means squeamish when it comes to protecting her interests, and with some skeletons in the closet herself, she tries to outsmart the ghost - but will she manage to escape? Much Whiskey accompanies the story in the vicinity of Nessie, the Loch Ness monster. Compulsory reading for all supporters of 'No Ladies in the Pub please'.
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Seitenzahl: 59
Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2022
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CONTENTS
Chapter I
Chapter II
Chapter III
Chapter IV
Chapter V
Chapter VI
Chapter VII
Chapter VIII
Tae a Thistle
Tae scots yer Mair than just a flower,
Yer a symbol o' great strength an' power,
Wrapped in shades o' purple an' green
Yer the bonniest flower this land has seen.
Some folks say yer jist a weed,
But we scots ken yer a mighty breed.
Yer delicate yet strong an' bold,
An' worth mair tae us than silver or gold.
Aye yer loved by Scottish heart's,
An' ye always wur right fae the start,
Wi' yer purple heeds and spiny stems,
Yer the richest 'o all oor Scottish gems.
I.
Fiona MacGill, hailing from Drumnadrochit, about 15 miles away from Inverness, is an unusual, sweet, fun-loving, witty, smart, and above all, quite rich young lady. Aside from the latter, there would be plenty of girls of her kind, but that is not what makes her so special; Fiona tells people that she can see ghosts and is not afraid of them.
She is not blonde, as the Gaelic language implies (fionn – fair, pale), but has long reddish hair, which she got neither from her mother nor her father; strangely enough, there was also no reddish hair in either grandparent's family.
No wonder, rumours arose that she had somehow been foisted upon. The fact that these rumours were most likely sparked by her younger brothers, Archie and Finley, with their inheritance claims in the back of their minds, is no longer relevant. Both have died in the meantime – or drowned, to be precise – and after her parents' tragic accident in a house fire, she became the sole heiress of a sizeable estate and fortune.
Speaking of drowning: Drumnadrochit, located on the western shore of Loch Ness in the Scottish Highlands, is a lovely little town and has become a popular tourist destination since the monster Nessie occasionally sticks its head out of the pond.
For centuries, the MacGill clan had lived in Dochgarroch, closer to Inverness, the capital of the Scottish Highlands. Here, at the northern end of Loch Ness, the water flows into the river Ness, then through Inverness and the Moray Firth into the North Sea.
One day, Archie MacGill, her father, said he no longer liked the local pub. This prompted him – a man who certainly did not shy away from a few drinks in good company – to move away with his wife and kid and settle on a magnificent estate a few miles further down the lake. A strange reaction, indeed, prompting some people to say that this could not have been the real reason for their move when they arrived in Drumnadrochit with little Fiona.
Several years later, Fiona gave her brother Archie a strong kick as they stood on the shore of Loch Ness, looking for the monster, as they often did. He sank immediately and never reappeared. They did not believe the eyewitness who had allegedly witnessed the scene. Fiona? Never! Everyone knows that Nessie is a plankton eater, and both brothers were excellent swimmers.
Loch Ness is part of the Caledonian Canal, a man-made as well as a natural river-and-lake waterway, with four beautiful lakes in between: Loch Lochy, Loch Oich, Loch Ness and Loch Dochfour, connecting the North Sea in the east with the Atlantic Ocean on the other side of Scotland – across the Highlands. The water flows in opposite directions, with the watershed between Loch Lochy, leading towards the North Sea, with the last lock at Inverness, and Loch Oich, where the water runs to the end of the canal and the lock at Fort William, and from there into the Atlantic. Both ends are at the same sea level, but moving through the Highlands, you have to overcome differences in altitude, which is only possible with numerous locks and swing bridges along the way.
The project remained a crazy idea, at least from an economic point of view. For tourists, who want to torture themselves for almost 100 kilometres under 11 swing bridges and through 29 single- or multistage locks, including the 8-stage (!!) lock at Banvie, reverently referred to as Neptune's staircase, where it takes 90 minutes to advance a short distance, it is the most magnificent waterway in the world, notwithstanding some occasional sightings of signs 'for immediate sale', put up by frustrated shipowners hoping for cash-paying buyers for their barge along the shore.
Drowned Archie should have got stuck at the nearby last lock outward towards the North Sea, but Fiona was well-prepared. Although Loch Ness has no significant current, only at the surface, when strong winds move the water, and everything sinks straight to the bottom, she did not take any chances. Clever Fiona also knows a few things about bathymetry, the study of the topographical shape of water basins.
The depth of Loch Ness is often disputed. Some say 230 meters; others speak of up to 325 meters. Since there are scores of caves at the bottom, measurements are problematic. As for the shape of the sidewalls, they run down abruptly and steeply, corresponding in places to a 75° angle on a sloping hillside, hence the best precondition to ask her brother Archie to pick up the picnic basket standing close to the shore. A firm loop around the wrist, so that he doesn't lose it, then a surprised exclamation, 'Look there, Nessie is coming up', followed by a determined kick – that's it!, especially if you have packed bricks instead of sandwiches.
A year later, Fiona had lured the other brother, Finn, away from the tourist-crowded place near the Urquhart Castle ruins to try her luck elsewhere, without annoying onlookers. She told him about a leather bag of 'sword and sceptre pieces', gold coins she had discovered in a recess near the shore, too heavy for her to carry home. When he was kneeling, she calmly knocked him out and sank him in the Loch, weighted with stones. After all, it would be a pity to lose another lovely picnic basket ...
Back to the ghosts: The ghost of Canterville, known to many from Oscar Wilde's books and the various Hollywood film adaptations, had been at long last 'properly' dead and buried, redeemed after centuries of being condemned to play ghost. Lately, he is haunting around again, and Fiona knew this from several personal acquaintances but never made a 'big deal' about it, she told close friends in confidence, thinking that this would only disappoint some contemporaries who strongly believe in the final redemption of Sir Simon de Canterville.
In contrast to her restraint with Sir Simon, she becomes quite open and talkative when she presents her other encounters of this kind in a merry circle. Her gruesome stories are full of disrespect for ghosts and the undead that borders on pure impudence.
She lets people know that she once mockingly approached the 'Man without a Head', and asked him why he never wears a hat. Before the baffled ghost could catch his breath and answer, she just laughed and exclaimed, »Because you don't have a head to put it on, you nitwit!«
