Thrilladvise! E-Book

Reiner Karl Wegner

• Herausgeber: novum publishing
• Kategorie: Gesellschafts- und Liebesromane
• Sprache: Englisch

Seitenzahl: 315

Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2025

Beschreibung

The world's first thriller guide. A suspenseful thriller and visionary guide in one! You are right there, live and in the thick of the author's victorious battle for his professional existence. Suddenly, I was in the middle of this intrigue. At the end of it, I would be completely ruined. A ruthless power game against several opponents begins. I take up the fight, launch a targeted counterattack, and emerge victorious. THRILLADVISE! guides you through the successful story, step by step through this merciless jungle of intrigue and manipulation. THRILLADVISE! shows you everything you need to know, from recognizing the first attacks early on, to the motivation of your attackers and the uncompromising counterstrategy, to the successful conclusion.

Leseprobe

Table of Contents

Thrilladvise!

I. Foreword

II The perpetrator

III The beginning

IV. The counter-strategy

V. Dismantling the perpetrator

Consequences for companies

VI The consequences of bullying

VII. Is prevention possible?

VIII. 12 commandments and 12 prohibitions

12 Prohibitions

IX. Closing words

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Thrilladvise!

I had hardly slept and got into my car at dawn to make my way to the company. A strange feeling came over me, just like the days and weeks before.

I can't say exactly when it started. I hadn't finished my studies for long, I was starting my career, full of drive and enthusiasm, and I didn't want to let the thoughts about it become too overwhelming. However, I could no longer suppress or hide them. Too much had already happened that I still couldn't really put into perspective.

These thoughts were always present and very stressful. In the office and also in my free time.

It was impossible to separate them, not for me, because I wanted to finally find a reason, an explanation for these thoughts. The oncoming, rising sun and its already warming rays could not distract me or lead me to positive thoughts. Nothing could stop me from brooding, because there was simply too much at stake.

I was far from knowing the true extent of it. Kilometer by kilometer, I approached the company in heavy rush-hour traffic and my feeling worsened with every minute, as it had every day for several weeks, and it became more unbearable every day. It was impossible to shake off these thoughts and I couldn't find an explanation for what was going on at work. It was all opaque to me and impossible to explain.

How was I supposed to categorize it, how was I supposed to understand it and, above all, what was I supposed to do about it?

I parked my car and got out accompanied by sunshine, already very pleasant temperatures and chirping birds. Actually a beautiful day, a good morning, I thought to myself. I walked across the parking lot surrounded by old trees into the building, through the glass front door of the company, past the reception and along the light-flooded wide corridor to my office.

I should have been satisfied and happy because I had got the job I had spent countless hours studying and working towards for years. But things turned out very differently. Different than I could ever have imagined. I was to find myself in an unimaginable nightmare from which I initially saw no escape.

No sooner had I switched on my coffee machine, smelled the aroma in the room, drunk my first cup and started my work than I heard the familiar footsteps that suddenly stopped in front of my glass door. These steps had been familiar to me for weeks and were now dreaded, almost meticulous, as if they were a ritual I had practiced for years.

Without knocking, the door handle moved slowly downwards and my boss entered my room with his unhurried, superior gait.

"Good morning," he called out to me. I don't know why he always spoke louder than necessary, but perhaps he wanted to emphasize the importance of his person.

I replied in a friendly manner: "I wish you the same, Mr. C."

A completely commonplace situation, millions of times over in countless workplaces around the world, you might think. But not here, not today, not in my office. There was no everyday life.

It was anything but "normal", not at all meant in a friendly way by the gentleman entering the room.

Here he was, and once again my uneasy feeling was not to be mistaken. Mr. C. was surrounded by an aura of self-importance and arrogance, coupled with icy coldness and aloofness. No wonder, I was far below him in the company hierarchy as a newcomer to the job and due to the age difference of around 30 years.

The niceties were over.

"It looks like a lot of work for you," he smugly hurled at me. "It'll be fine if you're with us longer, we've all had to go through it, you'll just have to work faster!"

No, please don't think he said that to ask how he could help as a boss or to motivate or encourage me. He didn't say it out of empathy or for any other positive reason.

That was exactly the reason why I had been feeling strange for weeks.

Hidden accusations, subliminal remarks that were repeated every day. Not formulated directly at first, but always nebulous, opaque and cryptic. Often concealed in questions that had a completely normal appearance. It was always ambiguous, impossible to categorize precisely, intangible, especially not for a young professional.

This was precisely the aim of the attacker: to create doubt, uncertainty and confusion. Those affected should be faced with a picture of uncertainty. This is the main weapon of every bully.

May I make it known: "my" main attacker in this upcoming battle for my existence, Mr. C., my direct superior.

***

I could never have imagined that the biggest fight for survival of my young career would take place in this company.

A merciless, unequal game of intrigue and manipulation begins. My commitment to this game is my professional existence, even my entire life.

That will never happen to me, never!

I had always thought so, but I was wrong, as I had never been wrong before. The unimaginable happens. I have to defend myself against hatred, envy and lies and face a merciless, immoral and unwanted battle, because I want to survive and win.

At that time, I did not yet know how immoral, determined and targeted my opponents would be and that I could only win if I was strong-willed and courageous enough to rise above myself.

I. Foreword

You can become a victim anywhere and no one is protected from it.

Whether you are an employee, craftsman, civil servant, trainee or board member. There is no status or profession in our working lives and no guarantee of not becoming the target of professional attacks. Whether in large corporations, SMEs, craft businesses, doctors' surgeries, law firms or any type of public or private company of any shape or size.

How the unequal game of intrigue and manipulation imposed by the perpetrator ends depends on many factors, which I will explain to you in detail and with comprehensible examples from my own successfully ended bullying story.

One thing must be clear to you from the outset: Your opponent wants your professional destruction, perhaps even more. The sooner you accept this, the sooner you can tackle it and have the opportunity to put an end to it.

Through targeted and well-considered behavior and procedures, which I describe in THRILLADVISE!, you can still put an end to this chase in your favor, because your opponent is not invincible.

As a pioneer, I have already followed all the paths suggested in this book in my own case and have successfully put an end to bullying. I write from the point of view of a former victim who was victorious in ending all bullying attacks and emerged from this battle stronger, more respected and more self-confident.

However, THRILLADVISE! does not replace necessary help from psychologists or doctors and help centers, as I myself have no medical or psychological training. I was victorious in my fight against bullying and was able to fend off all attacks. I have written THRILLADVISE! based on these experiences.

This book is intended to help you recognize, assess and successfully avert hostility, whether from superiors or colleagues, at an early stage.

The aim is to get back to a working life without daily anxiety and fear of new intrigues. You have to decide for yourself whether you want to take up this fight. Because if you are planning to leave the company anyway, the question is whether it is worth the effort.

THRILLADVISE! was written in this form to show very clearly and comprehensibly in which situations certain behaviors can lead to success and an end to bullying.

Bullying attacks not only place an extreme burden on employees in every company, even to the point of permanent incapacity to work, but also on the companies themselves, regardless of size and type. The companies are massively damaged and the efficiency, innovation and ultimately the entire success of the company are negatively affected. This is why the book is also of great benefit to entrepreneurs and managers.

You can use it to quickly identify employees in your own company who are initiating harmful attacks. What is described puts the company in a position to localize these trouble spots and their destructive intentions at an early stage and to act accordingly.

Your aim is to escape from this forced role of the attacked party as quickly as possible. The longer the attacks against you continue, the more difficult it will be to put an end to this development and chase. The later you realize that you are in the middle of this fight, the wider your opponent's "plans" and circles are. He may have already found helpers or gathered a large amount of "material" against you, which makes it very difficult to take countermeasures.

In addition, the longer this oppressive situation lasts, the greater the likelihood that you yourself will make crucial mistakes that your opponent will use to his advantage. In addition, the psychological pressure increases with the duration of the hostility and the strength to fight back naturally decreases because your body also becomes weaker and can only withstand this stressful situation for a certain amount of time.

It is therefore crucial to recognize and accept as quickly as possible at a very early stage that you are in the middle of a bullying fight. This is a very important chapter of this book. Don't close your eyes and think that these attacks will end by themselves, because unfortunately in most cases they will not.

Then you have a good chance of ending it successfully in your favor.

If I had realized more quickly in my own struggle what the problem was here, which people were playing their incomprehensible games, I could have spared myself a lot of drama, sleepless nights, grueling thoughts and countless attacks.

But unfortunately, I had to take this very arduous path in order to be able to write THRILLADVISE! and provide you with an efficient, forward-looking guide and support.

You can now see step by step how you can escape from this role and make it clear to your opponent that you are not defenceless.

It is one of the great misjudgements of many perpetrators who never count on one thing: the resistance, courage and will of those affected. The attackers feel confident of victory and this is also a great advantage for themselves. These people also have a great weakness, their boundless overconfidence, which becomes their Achilles' heel and can be exploited by the victim.

I have "tested" all of the procedures and steps described in THRILLADVISE! in my own case and have successfully ended "my" bullying as a result. An important goal is not only to defend yourself, but above all to attack your opponent with your own means and drive him into a corner.

I will explain to you how this works using my own experiences.

At the end of my successful fight, my opponents became victims of their own intrigues and manipulations and I left the ring stronger and full of self-confidence.

Good luck!

II The perpetrator

The character of the perpetrator

"What kind of person are you?", I thought to myself as Mr. C. stood in my room, asked me ambiguously and veiledly about my work status and indirectly accused me of working too slowly . Of course, as a newcomer to the profession, you need a little more time for certain tasks than an experienced colleague. We all know that and I'm sure every current manager has felt the same at some point.

We all know that and it's no secret.

When he left my room again, I took a deep breath and was glad not to have to see him again for a while. It was exactly how I felt on my way to the office in the early morning.

The same game as the previous days. He made it an iron rule to appear for a brief moment every day, spread uncertainty, cause confusion and leave again without a word. Always with a deceptive smile on his face.

That was the peculiarity he gave only to me. In other offices, his behavior was completely the opposite. He offered his support there and asked honestly about the status of work, but for a completely different reason. I knew this from colleagues who were also newcomers.

In some cases, certain tasks were temporarily divided among several colleagues in order to take the pressure off them, especially at the beginning.

But not with me, not even in the coming weeks, never. There was a reason for this, but unfortunately I didn't recognize it yet due to my inexperience. I hadn't yet developed any antennae for this.

When we talk about a person's character, most people think of positive traits. Honorable and beneficial traits of our counterpart. We would rather think of something good and keep anything negative away from us. This is only too understandable, but it also harbors a great danger. Perhaps we have built up this world of thoughts around us because we ourselves belong more to the positive species. In our private and professional lives. Why should I assume bad things about colleagues if they haven't treated me negatively yet?

I never thought about how I could harm a colleague, neighbor or someone who had done nothing to me for no reason. Why would I cause trouble, create an environment of resentment around me and attack others? Thoughts that are alien to any normal-thinking employee. We hope that everyone else thinks the same way, but unfortunately we are very wrong about some colleagues.

The typical character traits of people who deliberately engage in bullying are the opposite of what we generally imagine good character to be.

Only if we know, understand and learn to interpret the characteristics and, above all, the negative ones of our opponent can we correctly assess their actions at an early stage and in a targeted manner, then classify them correctly and finally take successful action against them. It is sometimes very stressful because we are preoccupied with the destructive, disastrous thoughts of our opponent.

Open your eyes and observe your surroundings closely, even if this sometimes seems trivial to you. It is important to perceive the actions and behavior of the perpetrator, also in relation to other colleagues and superiors, specifically and in detail. Only in this way can we get to know their character in detail, even if you may be reluctant to do so. In this way we get a picture, a description of his nature and can recognize his weaknesses. Every aggressor has these weaknesses.

Your aggressor must become an "open book" for you, then he is vulnerable. The more knowledge you gain about him in the course of this immoral game, the more advantageous it is for you.

Secret services do the same. There is no important statesman in the world whose character and behavior is not meticulously observed and analyzed by psychologists and other experts from secret services. Detailed reports are prepared for the same reason, to better predict and assess future actions and behavior. Every person has behavioral patterns that have become second nature to them, which they repeat again and again in similar situations.

This also makes your offender predictable and his behavior and next steps more predictable. We act in this way because we all basically carry a certain comfort within us and are very reluctant to change existing behaviors. This requires energy and activity, which we like to avoid. So when you observe a peculiarity in your opponent, it becomes an advantage.

It is similar to attending a play.

Those visitors who have at least read the short description beforehand can better understand the content and the behavior of the participants. They become comprehensible.

Your opponent is basically nothing more than an actor, sometimes a very good one, in other cases a very predictable one. Your workplace is his stage and you yourself are his extra.

Mr. C. has voluntarily taken on the role of the bad guy in the play "Mobbing" and is also directing it himself. He wants everything to go his way. To make this a reality, he uses the people around him, your colleagues, as extras, moving them around like chess pieces, manipulating them in his favor and using them to his advantage. Many will voluntarily take part in this play in order to benefit from it.

He plays with each individual in his own way, exploiting their dependencies, weaknesses and fears. With their help, he wants to achieve his coveted goal, their downfall.

He is supported in this by his internalized callousness.

Be vigilant, but not suspicious of everyone around you. Also observe the gestures of the person opposite you. Does he speak disparagingly or derogatorily to other colleagues about other employees?

Do they tell offensive, ambiguous jokes in coffee rounds or other meetings, even if some of those present feel offended or hurt by them?

Take note of these signs, because they can be very significant.

They are clear indications that this colleague is so callous that it can even take on pathological traits. This makes him an even more dangerous opponent who you must take very seriously.

This shows one thing very clearly: no matter who he wants to hurt or destroy, he will use any means to do so. Respect, moral boundaries and respect for other people are completely alien to him.

Believe me, my opponent was one of these, for me the absolute super-GAU. The worst of all performances. At no time did he shy away from using the most insidious means. He was completely indifferent to the health consequences for his opponent.

His callousness was usually accompanied by a boundless lack of conscience that is absolutely incomprehensible to us normal people. Wanting to destroy a colleague, for no reason and by any means, confirms that the perpetrator has this quality.

He is also aware of his actions and the often serious consequences for the health of others and accepts this without hesitation, shrugging his shoulders.

If you recognize this, you are already a huge step ahead, because your inner alarm bells have already signaled the danger to you.

All the prerequisites for people to live and work together peacefully, such as collegiality, fairness, helpfulness and empathy, regardless of the company, type, size or hierarchy, are alien to these people. Either they have never had it or they have lost it in the course of their lives. Their actions are determined by just one goal, their own personal goal : to harm others in order to build and accelerate their own advancement or the next career step. To damage, defame and segregate others, for whatever inexplicable, sometimes completely absurd reasons.

Any means is legitimate.

Whether it is betraying colleagues, belittling employees, spying, as is the case with superior offenders, or finding fault with the employee who is on their hit list. Even if these mistakes are small, inconsequential and insignificant.

Always remember that your opponent also has an unimaginable repertoire of abominations in his quiver that you can hardly guess at first. They will only become apparent as the game progresses.

In the end, the perpetrator hopes that these small irregularities will be a piece of the puzzle that will make you appear incompetent, out of your depth and unacceptable to the company.

The perpetrator wants to project his own character defects onto his victim in order to put her in a "bad light" with her superiors. He is also trying to distract attention from his own inabilities.

Another negative character trait is his constant desire to present himself to his superiors.

As I said, your counterparts are actors and they see the company as a stage on which they play employees off against each other. This in itself is a completely absurd idea, because it shows that all their ideas and goals contradict the actual company goal of success. This kind of self-promotion has already reached narcissistic, pathological proportions. In most cases, these people are not able to stand out to their bosses due to their special skills, professional qualifications or innovative thinking.

They know this and have therefore adopted a different tactic. To look for suitable employees and portray them as incompetent in order to distract attention from themselves and put you, their opponent, in the spotlight.

Whether the attackers are successful and what you can do about it yourself depends on many factors and is described in the following chapters.

The perpetrators want to put you in the spotlight in order to distract attention from their own misconduct, lack of qualifications and unwillingness to work. You, as the person affected, should be disqualified by your superiors as a result. The perpetrator uses all kinds of unfair means to gain advantages for himself.

The aggressor's entire actions are based on this short formula.

Your own opponent also draws his energy from the mixture of lack of conscience, callousness and obsessive self-promotion. This makes him very dangerous, because most people have never had contact with such unscrupulous beings up to this point, fortunately.

They are consistently toxic people who poison their environment and do nothing beneficial.

Mr. C. also followed his "prey", me, meticulously and unswervingly, like a hyena. For days, even weeks, he prowled around me, always on the lookout for my weak points or carelessness. He had a precise plan, which he worked through point by point. He used a lot of energy and resources in the process, which naturally distracted him from his actual work, for which he was paid.

Another characteristic of the perpetrators is that they put their personal goal above that of the company they are actually working for. This was precisely one of his major weaknesses that I noticed. This point later became my big advantage and played a major part in ending the bullying.

Any normal thinking person would say at some point: "This far and no further, enough is enough." For all of us, there are boundaries that we don't cross. This line is different for everyone, because at some point our conscience kicks in and stops us from making far-reaching mistakes.

It's different for the perpetrator. He does not know these boundaries, they simply do not exist for him. Morality is a foreign concept to him and this determines all his actions. These character flaws form the breeding ground for his despicable behavior and actions.

He acts like a destructive robot that has been implanted with a specific mission. However, the perpetrator gives himself this order. The target is programmed, the autopilot is switched on and all available options are used to reach the target as quickly as possible and destroy the opponent.

I know you will find all this very difficult to understand. I couldn't at first and I didn't want to either. These thoughts of the perpetrator are too disgusting for all of us and completely alien to us. We would prefer not to deal with it. We don't want to be confronted with this type of person and keep these toxic characteristics very far away from us. Unfortunately, we didn't choose for one of these characterless people to suddenly appear in our immediate surroundings and attack us.

But so that we can defend ourselves, we have no choice but to put up with it.

This toxic mixture is what makes him so dangerous and unpredictable. It is therefore difficult to recognize this, especially at the beginning, because you do not have these negative character traits yourself.

So in the early stages, the battle is fought with unequal weapons.

To counter these attacks, it is therefore essential to analyze these moral building blocks. Make a note of anything conspicuous. It will become your basis for taking action against them.

Even if you don't want to, you will have to partially outsource and forget your own moral principles and ideas for this fight. Only for a certain period of time, because this is absolutely necessary.

Pack your morals in mental boxes and open them again after the successful end. After all, you want to remain the person you are, only perhaps much more self-confident and stronger.

It is similar to a medieval jousting match. Each of the participants had different weapons to choose from. It would be very difficult and a great disadvantage if you had to choose a weapon without knowing the other person's choice.

If you do not know your opponent's choice, it is difficult to choose the most effective one for the fight. This is because you do not know how your opponent will attack. However, if you can observe your opponent's choice, you can react much more promisingly, fend off the attacks and decide the duel in your favor.

You are already somewhat familiar with your opponent's weapons.

They are ruthlessness and lack of conscience. We have to react to this and choose our weapons. One that promises success, of course. You won't get anywhere with honor and morality, only decent behavior and respect. It would be like our knight seeing his opponent draw a greatsword and only picking up a shield himself. Here it is clear from the start who will lose. And only because of a wrong choice.

Having been in your position myself, I naturally understand you very well. You feel a little helpless, overwhelmed and almost paralyzed by the whole situation. But if you've already realized that "something is up", something is wrong and your gut feeling has already kicked in, you're already one step ahead. Your opponent's absolute element of surprise is thus mitigated, because you have already unconsciously become more cautious. You have adjusted your antennae in the right direction.

You need time to grasp and assess certain situations that you have not yet experienced. No one will be any different, because as I said before, most of us will never have such thoughts.

***

We were sitting in the meeting room and I had been observing Mr. C., who always looked a little sweaty and spoke a little slurred, for a long time and thinking about his morning ritual. Inevitably, I noticed that he behaved completely differently to his colleagues. He had even tried to appear somewhat jokey, sometimes wanting to spread cheerfulness to some of them. He encouraged one colleague who also had a very heavy workload at the time. "I'll see what I can do for you," he said to the lady in a fatherly and empathetic manner. So that's how he can deal with colleagues too, I thought to myself. He discussed a particular substitution situation that needed to be dealt with. "Mr. Wegner, what do you say?" he suddenly turned to me. His look, his whole manner and his tone had changed drastically. Coolness was clearly noticeable in his words. There was no sign of empathy anymore, instead he looked at me very provocatively and I had the feeling that he wanted to make it clear what he thought of me with this action. Nothing!

"Can you live with that?" Of course he had surprised me again, cold as ice. As I said, it was about the illness of a colleague who now had to be replaced. Of course, her work had to be divided up somehow, as it couldn't be left undone.

"Please add this to your work! I think you can easily manage that with your workload if you make an effort," he told me clearly. "Bear in mind that you yourself could be ill for a longer period of time and have to cover for someone! In that case, you'll be glad to have colleagues helping you out." He didn't look at me, he penetrated me with his gaze, which had now changed to aggression. Everyone could see this change. "I'll do my best," I said curtly.

What was I supposed to say at that moment? No - I already have too much and I couldn't cope with the extra? That's what he had been waiting for and of course that's why he put me on the spot in front of the others. You should know that the rule was to talk to the colleague concerned before the new allocation was decided.

I was to be surprised and continue to be pushed to the limit that I could no longer cope with. He was testing my capacity for suffering. That's why he said in front of the whole team that I should be happy if I was in this situation, that colleagues were standing in for me. He was trying to appeal to my morale. That's remarkable to hear from someone who had no morals himself.

It was another typical approach by my perpetrator, the visible public unequal treatment and the public display of his victim. As in the Middle Ages, I was paraded in the "marketplace", as was customary for thieves and petty criminals of the time. Here, 600 years later, the same thing happened in his office. He made no secret of the fact that he wanted to treat me like a leper, while he ensnared female colleagues with his exaggerated care.

"Of course I can take care of that," I met Mr. C. kindly and didn't let my inner rage get out. My fists were clenched under the table, but nobody could see that.

At that moment, I had denied him his public success. He hadn't expected my reply, "Of course I can do it". In doing so, I thwarted his plan to get me to make uncontrolled comments, despite his provocative and humiliating behavior.

"That's very kind of you, thank you very much, dear colleague," he responded and I could clearly hear the frustration in his voice. Believe me, I was really close to giving him a piece of my mind in that room as to why he didn't divide the work between everyone, but gave it to the person who had the most work anyway. I really did officially have that and everyone knew it.

Later, in my office and on the way home, I was able to vent my frustration about this new "preferential treatment" unseen. Fortunately, the windows were closed so that no one could hear my clear words.

***

Why had I reacted in this way and not sought an open confrontation or discussion at that moment? Why did I - superficially - admit defeat?

Of course, because he had just been waiting for it, that was exactly his plan and it wouldn't have changed anything about his order.

There is no objectivity, no objectivity and no morality with bullies.

This initial question to me about whether I would take over was purely rhetorical. As so often, he just wanted to set a trap for me. Publicly, in front of colleagues, which, unfortunately for him, I didn't fall into.

Do you notice? In this situation, too, he wanted to distract from his own inability to divide up the colleague's work properly, as other managers do.

It would have required organizational skills that he didn't have. Distracting me and presenting me as incompetent and lazy in front of colleagues was his "goal for the day".

People with a conscience or collegial behavior would never have acted in this way.

What's more, he would have immediately passed on a hoped-for no or a discussion on my part to his superior. Similar to a house cat that catches mice and proudly lays them at its master's feet to receive praise.

***

I was glad to finally get into my car and drive home. I briefly reviewed this working day, but not for too long. My time away from the company was too valuable. I needed this distance to reduce the stress, which seemed to be increasing, and to process the increasingly aggressive attacks.

As I enjoyed the evening sun shining through my windows, I briefly thought about what surprise awaited me tomorrow. I was prepared and a little wiser thanks to his performance today, which had once again revealed a piece of his character.

After listening to my favorite singer on the way home, leaving the city traffic behind me and my heart rate back in the normal range, I was proud of my reaction to not falling into his trap. This day's victory had gone to me. At home, over a ham sandwich and a beer, he would no doubt tell me how he had put another colleague in his place.

Of course, he knew that he had actually suffered a defeat. His plan for the day had not worked. All his efforts were in vain and that would not be the last time.

***

My reaction was only successful because I had previously observed some of his character traits closely and made use of them at that moment. Yes, I now had more work to do. But that was by far the lesser evil compared to my opponent's plan coming to fruition.

Remember, every one of your opponent's plans that doesn't work out according to plan gradually leads to their insecurity and your advantage. The number of defeats leads to the end of bullying.

Without the character traits described above, which every perpetrator has internalized, Mr C. would never have acted in this way, unless his conscience had kicked in beforehand. It is precisely this characteristic that all attackers do not have.

A conscience that all social beings have.

I had put myself in his mindset and had already prepared myself for something similar in the run-up to the meeting. I knew that the colleague's replacement had to be arranged and that he would try to isolate me from the group in this way. He had hoped for a reaction that I didn't give him.

His moment of surprise had vanished into thin air.

Putting yourself in your opponent's mindset and behavior is a crucial and essential step. Even if you don't want to. It is necessary in order to protect you from further harm.

The abhorrent behaviour of the perpetrators may seem so absurd and strange to you that it takes time to internalize it and come to terms with it. But perhaps that is a small consolation for you. It is only necessary for a certain amount of time.

However, you don't have much time to think about it, because the situation is far too serious and his next attacks are already being planned.

Your opponent, like mine, finds this behavior and the associated injuries or humiliation easy, as he has no conscience. You will notice that I am repeating these facts because it will be decisive for your success and will enable you to internalize this.

One of the biggest mistakes you can make is to underestimate your opponent or treat his actions as coincidences. That would play into his hands. Also don't think that the hostilities will end on their own. In most cases, they won't. Because he enjoys it and with every successful action, his absurd and sick world of thought is strengthened.

Perpetrators feed off this destructive energy and draw endless motivation from it, as they hope to benefit greatly from it.

During bullying, the perpetrator develops a dynamic that could normally be of great benefit to the company itself if it were only positive. Unfortunately, these people direct their entire work force into other, destructive channels and use it for their own interests.

Their priorities are focused on their own personal goals, and that is not a good balance sheet or increasing the company's turnover. The perpetrator sees his actual job as a side job, for which he has less and less time due to his activities against you.

This fact will become one of your great advantages and I will explain it to you in the course of the book so that you can use it to your advantage.

***

The assistant Mrs. E. had not expected her boss to visit her today on this rainy, chilly day. He hadn't announced his visit either, because he never does. He loves surprises because he thinks it always gives him an advantage. She was one of my younger colleagues and Mr. C. was also her boss. He purposefully entered her office and leisurely took a seat in a chair without asking if she had a moment to discuss a few things with him.

"How are you doing today?" he asked, turning to her with self-confident interest. "You're going on your well-deserved vacation soon, where are you going?" He was curious and liked to know about his employees' leisure activities. Where they were traveling, whether they were going out to eat, everything. He himself was a closed book and told nothing. "I'm doing very well just before my vacation, which I'm really looking forward to," replied Ms E. She had got up from her desk chair to show her respect for Mr C., her boss.

"You work a lot with our Mr. Wegner! Do you get on well?" the visitor wanted to know. In the meantime, Mrs. E. had sat down again and was a little confused by the question because she couldn't understand it. No one had ever asked her such a question before. The collaboration had worked very well because she got on well with her colleague Wegner. That's why she looked a little surprised at Mr. C.

"We get along very well," she replied without having to think about it. "Mr. Wegner is friendly and the work goes well." Mr. C. wasn't thrilled with the answer, but didn't show it and probed further.

"How are you coping with his work? Does he cover you with work? He has a very large work area, so mistakes can happen in the heat of the moment," he said with a forced laugh without comment. Mr. C. liked to express himself figuratively. His intention was to emphasize his words. Mr. C. laughed and wanted to see it as a little joke to distract from his actual intention. That was, of course, to get first-hand information about my working methods.