Irresistible Persuasion E-Book

Geoffrey Burch

• Herausgeber: John Wiley & Sons
• Kategorie: Fachliteratur
• Sprache: Englisch

Seitenzahl: 334

Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2010

Beschreibung

"Geoff Burch is the master of persuasion"
—Allan Pease, International bestselling author of Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps

This book will change your life. (Is that persuasive enough?)

Getting what you want isn't easy. Why? Because most of us have no clear idea what we're looking for a lot of the time. The key to being brilliantly persuasive and influential is knowing exactly what you want before you set out to get it. Irresistible Persuasion presents a process that you can apply to any situation; you choose your starting point and your goal, then just join the dots. It's the only way to make success completely inevitable.

Irresistible Persuasion shows you how to entice people to your point of view, how to overcome resistance, how a bit of showbiz can go a long way and why you should always consider the other person when you're negotiating. It's packed with new persuasion and influencing techniques as well as many powerful traditional methods.

Geoff Burch is the presenter of BBC TV's All Over the Shop. When he's helped you decide what you want, he'll show you the irresistible way to get it. You won't just get more customers, you'll get more profitable customers.

Leseprobe

Table of Contents

Title Page

Copyright Page

Dedication

Acknowledgements

Introduction

PART ONE - PLANNING YOUR JOURNEY TO SUCCESSFUL PERSUASION

CHAPTER 1 - GET THE MAP OUT

Do You Know Where You are Going?

A Wasted Opportunity

No Second Chances

What are You Going to Ask for?

Can You Read The Queen’s Mind?

If You Want to Know What Someone’s Answer is Going to be, Ask Them The ...

CHAPTER 2 - THE JOURNEY BEGINS

A Map of The Real World

Worse Things Happen at Sea

Are You Qualified?

Get The Right Equipment

To Win The Acme Insurance Cleaning Contract What Should We Ask?

PART TWO - THE JOURNEY

CHAPTER 3 - MONEY GROWS ON TREES

Too Good to be True?

Trust Me!

It’s Magic

Lucky in Love

Don’t Make It Hard on Yourself

The Risk Factor

An Offer You Can’t Refuse

How Can This Story Help Us?

CHAPTER 4 - I DIDN’T EXPECT THAT

Things Can Only Get Better

I Can See The Future

A Happy Pig is a Dead Pig

Jam Tomorrow

The Conman’s Handbook

The Devil Knows Best

Promises, Promises

Jam Tomorrow - or Trouble Tomorrow?

CHAPTER 5 - BORN TO BE BAD?

Building His Vision

Harness His Enthusiasm

Yes, I Believe

Timeout

Stating The Bleedin’ Obvious

Passion Fruit

Choose Your Attitude

First Day at Work

Kevin Goes to Zurich

The Dirty Dog

Play Nicely, Now!

Behaviour That Changes Behaviour

Make ’Em Smile, Make ’Em Smile

CHAPTER 6 - VERY INTERESTED

V.Int

The Time-Waster’s Guide

Nice People Don’t Buy

You Can’t Judge a Book by Looking at Its Cover

The Chimp and The Mercedes

Everyone is Important

Don’t Let The Librarian Waste your Time

CHAPTER 7 - THE TOUGH OLD MONSTERS OF SALES

A Tough Old Game

They Had Never Sold Anything in their Lives

Extinct?

Selling Quality

A Head of Steam

In The Steps of The Master

It’s Only Words

The Magic Formula

No Objections

CHAPTER 8 - WHEN I’M CALLING YOU

Johnny Kaminski

Johnny Under The Microscope

Pushy But Proud

It Beggars Belief

Keep It Simple, Stupid!

Stick to The Script

Full Steam Ahead

If It Works, Repeat It, for Repeated Success!

Hot Leads

The Confidence Trick

The Power of The Phone

CHAPTER 9 - NOW YOU’RE ASKING

You Only Had to Ask

The Prizes That Questions Can bring

It’s a Status Thing

Games People Play

Ask The Way

A Night of Passion with Chummy

Shallow

Ask a Local

CHAPTER 10 - THE CUNNING PLAN

A Drama in Three Acts

CHAPTER 11 - A.I.D.A. OLD BUT STILL LOVELY

Pay Attention

Child’s Play

Any Outcome, a Happy One

They Knew What They were Doing

Knockers

Objects of Desire

Action Plan

Get “No” and I’ll Pay You

CHAPTER 12 - SHOWBUSINESS

A Proper Hairdresser

Come on Baby, Light My Fire

Rock and Roll

Apart from That, Mrs Lincoln, How was The Play?

Take a Load off Me

Let The Sunshine in

Selling a Negative

It’s Nice to be Nice

Oh, Doctor, I’m in Trouble

Does That Hurt?

PART THREE - ARE WE THERE YET?

CHAPTER 13 - RESISTANCE IS FUTILE

Come with Me to The Kasbah

Look for The Clues

If Only

A Condition of Purchase

Objection, Your Honour

Work with Me Here

Get in First

CHAPTER 14 - THE PRESSURE GAME

Check Before Closing

Bringing Home The Bacon

I Rest My Case, M’lud

CHAPTER 15 - BIG DECISIONS

Major or Minor?

No Decision, No Blame

Exposed

All Change

Dissatisfaction Guaranteed

Living in The Past

Down to Brass Tacks

The Problems are Growing

It’s Never as Easy as It Seems

They’ll Beat a Path to Your Door

The Sword Swallower’s Dilemma

CHAPTER 16 - MEASURING SUCCESS

I Can See My House from Here

I Think I’d Describe That as a Failure

Out of Control

Don’t Upset The Tea Lady

Its All in The Presentation

More Than a Bit Concerned

Planning an Ambush

CHAPTER 17 - IT’S A REAL BARGAIN

Cheap at Half The Price

Call Their Bluff

Skilful Bargaining

The Win-Win Cliché

CHAPTER 18 - EVERYTHING’S NEGOTIABLE

She Had Got Him Licked

They Just Want to be Happy

Nothing Personal

War is a Serious Business

Go Looking for Trouble

Don’t Get Personal

Indecent Exposure

Hidden in The Small Print

How Low will You Go?

Kill The Wabbit!

Develop Your Backstop

Let Them Blow Off Steam

Too Much Invested to Walk Away

CHAPTER 19 - PERSUASIVE MARKETING

The Vital Ingredient

Not What They Expected

Gangsters Can Do It

Let Me Twist Your Arm

The Wandering Husband

If You Caught a Customer, Would You Know What to Do with Them?

See You Next Fall

Great Expectations

PART FOUR - THE PSYCHOLOGY OF PERSUASION

CHAPTER 20 - IT’S ALL IN THE MIND!

We have Ways of Making You Believe

Vive La Difference

Preserve Their Pride

Ideas Above Their Station

The Body Says It All

Control Yourself!

GOODBYE FOR NOW

SOME INTERESTING READING

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

This edition first published 2010

© 2010 Geoff Burch

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Library of Congress Cataloguing-in-Publication Data

ISBN 978-1-907-31248-9 (paperback), ISBN 978-0-857-08079-0 (ebk), ISBN 978-0-857-08098-1 (ebk), ISBN 978-0-857-08099-8 (ebk)

A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.

Set in 11.5 on 12.5 Adobe Caslon Pro-Regular by Aptara

DEDICATION

To my lovely missus, Sallie. What no one understands is that the computer keyboard is a foreign land to me so I write these books with a crayon and with my tongue lolling. Without my wife’s hard work, patience and love, you wouldn’t be reading this now.

I would also like to thank my two sons, James and Simon, and their growing families, who never for a moment allow me to get away with being a pompous pillock - thank goodness!

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

To: the team at my publishers, Holly, Megan, Iain, and Oriana, who kept me on the straight and narrow throughout the creative process! Thank you.

INTRODUCTION

LET’S START AT THE VERY BEGINNING

Businesses fail because they fail to persuade. You may think that this is a sweeping statement but think about it for a moment. The small engineering company collapses because it fails to persuade the bank to lend it any more money. The banks collapse because they fail to persuade the City to make short-term loans against their long-term mortgage lending. The car manufacturer goes under because they cannot persuade the workforce to return to work after a damaging strike - and, perhaps the saddest of all, the new enterprise that never got off the ground because it failed to persuade potential customers to give it a try.

There are so many inspirational and instructive business books that cover everything from management to self belief, but that vital ingredient, persuasion, is never really viewed correctly. Persuasion is a process that, when mastered, can be applied beneficially to all or any aspects of business - or life!

Probably the best way to view this process is as a journey. Imagine for a moment that you are planning a trip. The trouble is that we humans have been travelling for so long that we carry out what is a very complicated procedure in such an automatic way that we don’t realize how clever we are being. If we dismantle the process we will see just how sophisticated we have been. Firstly, we decide where we would like to go, and then we make sure we know where we are now. We check out the distance between these two points, decide our mode of travel, the likely obstacles we will encounter, assess the cost and calculate the time required.

You do that every day, from a walk to the shops, a drive to see Aunty Hilda, or a trek around the world. How many times have you failed to reach your destination? Sure, there are unexpected events - we bump into a chum for a chat, there is bad traffic, or we get pursued by ravenous head hunters, but I bet that you have almost never ever failed to get where you wanted to go. In fact, you quite often overestimate the obstacles and come in early and under budget.

For the Aunty Hilda trip, we might employ the aid of a road atlas. Imagine if it was written by a motivational speaker:

“How far is it to Aunty Hilda’s town?”

“It’s not as far as you think!”

“How do I get there?”

“By believing in yourself!”

“How do I plan the trip?”

“By positively visualizing yourself there!”

A road atlas like that wouldn’t remain very long in your possession until it found itself a new career as kindling, yet we tolerate that sort of rubbish in our business lives. When we find ourselves betting our whole future and everything we own on our enterprise, we cannot afford ‘ifs and buts’. What is needed is a road map to success - and that is what this book sets out to do.

We must see our pathway to business success in the same way we see a journey. Where do we want to get to? Where are we now? And what obstacles and landmarks do we see along the way? The persuasive skills that we use change as they are applied at different times and to different areas of the enterprise.

Staying with the concept of the journey for a moment, a unique thing about human travel is that we have a fairly clear idea of where we are at any moment in the journey. The early mariners, when out of sight of land, expended a huge amount of effort to try and ascertain where they were at any moment in time. They created instruments such as the sextant and the most accurate timepieces their technology could produce. Why? What does it matter? Leave home, get there, what does it matter what goes on in between?

Well, we know it does matter. Disaster is awaiting the traveller who isn’t sure where they are. When planning our trip to Aunty Hilda, we look for all the towns, villages and landmarks along the way and tick them off. If there is one that we weren’t looking for, or if we fail to see something we expected, we start to suspect we are going the wrong way - sometimes within minutes of setting off so no real harm done.

So why can’t we do it with business?

We start our new business; where are those hordes of new customers, how far away are they from doing business with us? A bit of persuasive marketing will find them. Once we’ve found them, how do we part them from their cash? Persuasive selling is what you need! As the business soars away, how do you get people to do the work of persuading for you? A bit of persuasive management!

The truth is that you need to stop being you. We tend to buy instructional and motivational books because we are not entirely satisfied with what we are getting. We would like to achieve a change of circumstance without the pain of changing ourselves. The trouble is that the people we envy and admire as being more successful than us have a different attitude, behaviour-set and appearance from us and that is why they get what we don’t (yes, I hate them too!). You can imitate them, which works a bit; you could even construct them as a dramatic character and play them as a part, but of course the problem then, as any great thespian will tell you, is that to play a part really well you have to become the person you are playing - which kind of takes us back to square one.

The truth is that the Aston Martin-driving cool guy in the Savile Row suit, Rolex watch and expensive cologne is probably wearing tight rubber underwear, has uncontrolled dreams of strangling guinea pigs, and troubles of his own. This does not take us away from the old but true cliché which states, “If you do what you’ve always done, you will get what you have always got. If you don’t like what you’re getting, you will have to change what you are doing.”

Can a book change what we do? The one my history teacher whopped me round the head with certainly improved my attention span, and left me with a slight cauliflower ear and an encyclopedic knowledge of the Hundred Years War!

All this book can do is set down the facts and tools that you will need to become more persuasive in everything you do. The problem is you cannot half persuade - your target is either persuaded or not persuaded. Guilty or not guilty. The jury is out on you and your future, and they won’t come back with an ‘Only a bit guilty’ verdict.

Let me reveal a little secret about myself. I take this subject seriously, it’s my life’s work, it’s my career, and it’s how I make my money. In other words, I want to be taken seriously but I get criticized for using too many jokes and stories.

John Cleese said, “You don’t have to be sombre to be serious.” You might notice there will be a waft of psychobabble around this book and it is because I was brought up by a strange Viennese shrink who made me see how the human mind works and how it can be made to work to our advantage. The first example of this is laughter. What is it? The teeth exposed, strange barking and gibbering noises. If you saw a monkey doing this, you would say it was frightened. Maybe jokes touch little nerves of truth that other words don’t reach…

So here’s the first.

There was this little guy who always felt that he deserved more from life. He was, in his own eyes, a good guy, he prayed regularly not just for himself but for the ills of the world. Yet others, and what he considered to be inferior people, had fate hand them riches. The lottery, for instance, why should the feckless and lazy win millions each week? This time he would pray just for himself.

“Lord, I’m a good guy; let me win the lottery this week.”

A week went by with no luck.

“Lord, I’ve got to say, I’m a bit disappointed with your response. Let me win the lottery, please. I pray regularly, surely I deserve it more than those other dreadful people!”

Another week and still no luck.

“Lord, what is the point in being devout if you let me down like this? Please let me win the lottery!”

Finally, a mighty voice thundered from above.

“Fred! I’m sorry you haven’t won the lottery, but meet me half way - BUY A TICKET!”

Who wants you to succeed? Your friends? Maybe, maybe not. We measure ourselves against others and if you, their dear old pal, suddenly start to achieve the things they have failed to, where does that leave them.

Your family? Can they trust you to stay around now you no longer have the failures they can lovingly forgive you for? There are two ways to win a race - either to train hard and be the fastest, or nobble the opposition. Most people will try the second option and win life’s race by holding everyone else back.

So who really wants you to succeed? Why me, of course! Just picture the scene in a few years’ time. You are on television as one of the five richest people in the world.

“So, to what do you owe your success?”

“Well, I suppose it started when I read this book by Geoff Burch!”

What do you think that this is going to do to my book sales? I’ll be up there in the top five with you. Of course I want you to succeed (that, by the way, is a great persuasive lever: ‘mutual self interest’, ‘win-win’), but come half way to meet me, buy a ticket. If we are going to go on this journey together, you must be prepared to do things differently or things won’t change for you for the better.

Persuasion is the skill that can transform business, but it needs to be seen as an inevitable journey and over the next pages I will reveal the map.

PART ONE

PLANNING YOUR JOURNEY TO SUCCESSFUL PERSUASION

CHAPTER 1

GET THE MAP OUT

This is where we decide where we are going and we find out where we are now

“Yeah,” you said, picking this book up: “I’d like to be able to persuade people to do stuff and buy stuff and give me stuff!”

But what ‘stuff’? What exactly do you want from this process? If this was a road map, where precisely do you want to get to?

In that brilliant book, Alice in Wonderland, Alice is lost and bewildered. Seeing a weird cat up a tree, she decides to ask it for directions (you have to be a bit bewildered to start asking weird cats directions).

“Excuse me, where do I go from here?”

The Cheshire cat (for it is he . . .) replies:

“It all depends on where you want to get to.”

Alice says,

“I don’t much care where.”

The Cheshire Cat rejoins:

“Then it doesn’t much matter which way you go, then, does it.”

Do You Know Where You are Going?

Look at your map and tell me where exactly on this particular journey you want to get to. Please don’t reply with, “Somewhere better than this”, or “to get to see the decision maker” or even “more sales”.

We need to be a lot clearer in our minds about where we are and where we want to get to if we want to assess how best to get to our destination, the difficulties we are likely to encounter, the time it will take, and the benefits of undertaking the journey in the first place. Vagueness leads to disaster. Retailers have a sort of vague notion that their staff have something to do with the revenue of their business. Ergo, staff could be prevailed upon to help increase the said revenue. Eureka! They need training! Now I do training and, although I say it myself, I feel I’m very good at it.

I have a cat that has the intrinsic intelligence of a tennis ball, but by denying it food I have got it TRAINED to shake hands with me. I will hold out a small piece of cooked meat and this thing will hold out its paw.

“Oh look!” the audience cry, “the kitty is shaking hands with its master.”

But, what’s the cat thinking?

Is it thinking, “How do you do, master. I’m so sorry that I was unable to join you earlier, but I’ve just been having a poo in the garden.”

Is that what the cat’s thinking? I bet its not! The reality is that the cat is thinking nothing at all. Its mind is a complete blank.

The retailer’s training regime works on a similar basis. The key is that they train ‘how to’ not ‘why’.

“This is how you greet the customer.”

“This is how you present the bag.”

“This is how you answer the phone.”

But they don’t know why they are doing it.

Perhaps you bought this book because you wanted me to show you how to persuade. But have you ever considered why you should persuade?

Does it matter? Here is a very cruel but funny (so worth doing!) experiment you can try for yourself. Walk into a large high street store, whereupon you will be greeted by a highly trained member of staff.

“Can I help you?”

To which you are supposed to reply, “No thank you, I’m just looking.”

For this experiment, change the script and watch the fireworks.

“Can I help you?”

“With what?”

“Pardon?”

“What did you want to help me with?”

“I don’t know!”

“Then why did you ask me that?”

Total breakdown! “I don’t know why I’m saying it, they make me!”

They literally do not know why they’re doing it.

So is it that important to know why things happen or why you are doing what you are doing? I believe that it certainly is - it is an argument I often have with non-mechanical car drivers. When I push the clutch pedal down, I have a picture in my mind of the moving levers and whirling cog wheels. Most people would say, “I press the pedal and the car goes”, but when one day that fails to happen and you have no understanding of why it failed to happen, you are left stranded until somebody with understanding comes and saves you. This is exactly the same with the persuasion process; you may learn parrot fashion a number of simple ‘how to’ phrases, but if you don’t understand why you are using them, any failure or deviation from the path you expected could mean disaster. To be a great persuader you have to understand all the cogs and wheels and know why you are doing what you are doing and how that fits into the persuasion journey.

THINK ABOUT THIS

Let’s look at our map again. Where do you want to get to on this journey?

This is a great exercise for you to do now!

What is it that you are looking for? Are your answers something like this?

I would like a better job.

I would like a few big customers.

I wish my staff were more loyal.

It would be great if each customer spent more.

That is too vague - just pick one.

I would like a few big customers. Like who? Acme Metals Ltd.

What have you got to offer them?

Who do you need to see there?

Who is their current supplier?

Why aren’t you currently doing business with them if they are such a good target? What on earth have you been doing until now?

How far away are they from doing business with you?

Is your offer sufficiently robust to keep them as a customer for life?

A Wasted Opportunity

Warning! This book will help you to get opportunities. Don’t waste them by going off half cocked. Second chances are very much harder to get (but not impossible - although more of that later).

Read this story and tell me what the guy did wrong (clue, it isn’t just one thing, either).

Some time ago I was talking to a room full of business start-ups. Persuasion, I told them, was the skill they needed to get their businesses off the ground. At the back there was a guy who clearly wasn’t buying in. Finally he spoke out. “It’s alright for you with your silken tongue and subtle ways. OK, I’m convinced, you could persuade anyone!” (Except him, apparently.) “If I could do what you do I would be up and running. Just give me the chance and watch me go!”

“OK,” I said, “Let me help you. I’m yours to command! Who would you like me to persuade on your behalf?”

“Er, um,” he looked around the room, and then out of the window he spotted a large office block. He became quite agitated and pointed, “Them!” he cried, “I want an appointment with them. I’ve got an office cleaning business and that is some office. If I could speak to the decision-maker there, all my dreams would come true!”

“Well,” I said, “it just so happens that the CEO of that insurance giant is Sir Jack Thomas, a personal friend of mine. So would you like an appointment with him?”

“Oh yes!”

With this, I picked up the phone.

“Acme Insurance. How can I help you?”

“Oh yes, can I speak to Sir Jack please?”

“Who shall I say is calling?”

“Tell him it’s his old pal, Geoff!”

A very fruity voice came on the line. “Geoff! How are you? What can I do for you today?”

“I’m very well indeed, thank you, Sir Jack. I would like a bit of a favour from you please.”

“Anything, Geoff, just name it!”

“I’ve got a chap on one of my courses who has an office cleaning business and he would love an appointment with you.”

“Of course, Geoff. Any friend of yours is a friend of mine. When would he like to come?”

“Tomorrow? About 3.00 pm?”

“That would be fine. I’ll see him then.”

The next day at around 3.00 pm there is a knock at Sir Jack’s door.

“Come in!”

Our hero appears with his bag of bits held tight, white knuckled to his chest.

“Oh hello, Sir Jack. It’s very kind to you to see me at such short notice.”

“No. It’s a pleasure. Now tell me all about yourself.”

“Well, I was made redundant a few weeks ago and with it being so difficult to get a proper job and that, I decided to start this office cleaning business.”

“Oh how enterprising. How is it going?”

“OK, I suppose. I could do with more work.”

“Yes, of course. Do you have a leaflet or a brochure?”

“I do. My brother-in-law designed it when he was in prison, during his anger management classes!”

“. . . and such vivid colours . . . Well, it has been nice to meet you and can I wish you the very best for the future.”

At this, the interview is terminated by a warm smile and firm handshake from Sir Jack. Our hero came galloping back full of excitement.

“What a lovely man. The boss of that huge company. He couldn’t have been nicer.”

“So have you got the contract to do their office cleaning?”

“Er?”

“Why didn’t you ask for his cleaning contract?”

“I didn’t want to upset him - he would only have said no.”

“Would he?”

“Of course. The place was spotless; he’s probably got someone a hundred times our size doing the cleaning already.”

What a waste. I called in a huge favour from someone really influential just so that this half-wit could crouch in their office clutching his bag of assorted grubbiness to his chest for absolutely no reason whatsoever. Perhaps after some counselling we could have more success with the next appointment. What next appointment? Why should Sir Jack ever want to see this idiot again? He had one chance and he blew it.

No Second Chances

I know you haven’t read this book yet but at this moment can you see what went wrong?

First, who or what was he going to try and persuade to do what? On our persuasion map that is our destination. Imagine that this book takes away all the hard work, and just by reading it, you will have all the power to persuade anyone to do anything.

The first exercise, setting aside all other things, is who are you going to persuade to do what? Most of us have absolutely no idea. If you are a fan of the self-help gurus, you’ll know that they can sometimes drivel on about positive visualization and goal setting.

“Where do you see yourself in five years time?” they say, and then they get you to picture palm-fringed beaches and private jets. In the world of our similarly disingenuous politicians this is macro-thinking; the big picture, life choices. But I am asking you to go back to the simple basic stuff like, “Do you want custard or ice cream?”

Let me ask you again, who do you want to persuade to do what? Until you have answered that, we have no destination on our map and the journey will not start.

What are You Going to Ask for?

Let’s go back to our office cleaner and his first of many mistakes. He has started a small office cleaning company that he feels would do well if it had more customers (right!). He saw a large office; they clearly had a large floor area that would need loads of cleaning (right!). This would be a good job for him to have (why does he think that?). What research has he done to discover that this is a customer he should have? (None). He meets the most important man in the company. That man would most likely be very influential in any decisions the company would make (that is right), so what did he ask for from Sir Jack? (Here’s a clue, he asked for absolutely nothing.)

So if you were in his place all because your mouth had got you an appointment with someone you weren’t ready to do business with, what are you going to ask for?

Just for the moment forget the big picture, the jets, the palms, and the cuddly sunsets. Let’s have a look at the small picture. Let me be your Cheshire cat - where do you want to get to?

Our cleaning chum got very agitated when I expounded this thought process to him.

“OK, what would you ask for?” he cried.

During this book I am going to reveal dark secrets, subtleties and techniques but that’s for later. Let’s jump in with both feet. Forget subtle - it’s bull in a china shop time!

“I came here today, Sir Jack, to ask you to give me the cleaning contract for this building, so can I have the cleaning contract please?”

“Ah ha,” said my man capering around like a loon, “what if he says no?”

“Well”, I said. “What if he says yes?”

“Well, he won’t!”

Let’s just stop here for a moment. Does our chum - and do you - answer his/our/their own questions? You may as well wake up in the morning, choose all the people you would like to persuade, answer “no” on their behalf and then roll over and go back to sleep.

Can You Read The Queen’s Mind?

Some time ago I was training a room full of double glazing salespeople. These people were tough, real foot-in-the-door merchants, whose skill was euphemistically called ‘creative selling’. This doesn’t mean that they all wore Breton berets, paint-spattered smocks and weren’t afraid to cry. What it meant was that when running at full throttle they could ‘create’ sales out of thin air. Cold-calling was their thing. They could bang on your door and when you appeared partially dressed with a mouthful of still unchewed dinner, could turn your fury into uncontrollable desire for home improvements. They were all getting a bit smug so I said that when in London I had noticed that Buckingham Palace did seem to have a huge number of windows but none of them seemed to be double glazed. I picked out one of these salespeople and asked what the Queen’s reaction had been when they had cold-called to set up the appointment.

Try this yourself. Imagine you are this person; what is your reaction? What? You haven’t actually asked the Queen? Why not? Stacks of windows to do, plenty of money to pay. Where’s the problem? Now you start to list the problems. “I could never get to speak to the Queen.” “She wouldn’t get involved in stuff like that.” “She probably doesn’t have a phone number.” “I would most likely get locked up in the Tower!” You are predicting trouble and disaster before it happens.

I have to confess that I also wouldn’t try and sell double glazing to the Queen, but I feel that I may use a different kind of reasoning which would include a properly-calculated assessment of the profitability of selling to the Royal Family, the accessibility of the Royal Family, and the value that it would bring to me and my business against the enormous investment in time (actually thinking this through, perhaps I should go off and sell double glazing to the Queen; “By Royal Appointment” would look very impressive on my headed notepaper). What I am trying to say is, if you decide against a project through careful evidence-based and reasoned argument, that is not the same as not bothering because you are frightened, prejudiced, or have preconceived ideas. The point is, whoever we are dealing with, whether it is the Queen, the Pope, or Sid next door, unless you are genuinely a mind-reader don’t guess the answers to questions you haven’t already put to them simply because their status or your timidity has caused you to presume you know what their reply will be.

If You Want to Know What Someone’s Answer is Going to be, Ask Them The Question. There is No Other Way.

As you may have guessed, I am not a great fan of cheery “sun’ll come up tomorrow” positive thinking and you may find it confusing if you think I’m heading towards the ‘BE POSITIVE’ frame of mind - which has left me with a really big dilemma. What I am trying to say is, don’t be negative. Perhaps cold and calculating would be better - just put away that cheery smile and the tambourine and THINK THIS THING THROUGH.

This persuasion thing is a game, a game of strategy, objectives and tactics. Just like chess - up against a Grand Master? “Then he’ll wup your arse!” That is a fairly negative prediction of the outcome. Up against a Grand Master? A cheery whistle, a firm handshake and true self-belief will win me every game! The idiot’s view. Up against a Grand Master? Maybe he will go for the Molotov-mate, the Perkins Gambit is one of his options. A solid defence and unexpected attack would give me a chance. Knowing this guy’s game, he is very strong but does have weakness in the back rank and always castles out of habit. Now that is anticipation.

Prediction is something you do with crystal balls, runes and frogs’ entrails. Anticipation is done with knowledge, care, and planning. The essence of this chapter is about knowing where you are going, why you are going there, and how to draw a clearly defined map and plan of how you are going to do it.

POINTS TO PONDER ON CHAPTER 1

1. You cannot plan a journey if you have no idea where you are going.

2. It is very nice to know how to do things but not much use if you don’t know why you are doing them.

3. If your wish-list is too long and too vague, none of your wishes will come true. Remember, even the best genies only give three wishes.

4. Pick a target and make a list of things that stand between you and victory.

5. If hard work or good luck grants you an opportunity, don’t waste it; make sure you know precisely how you are going to use this opportunity.

6. Don’t answer other peoples’ questions in your mind — the only way to get answers is to ask questions face to face.

7. Anticipate, don’t predict.

8. Anticipate, don’t assume.

CHAPTER 2

THE JOURNEY BEGINS

In which we plan, plot, and equip ourselves for success

Let’s start to put our journey together. In the case of our hero, the destination was to win the cleaning contract from Acme Insurance. Let’s put that spot on the map. Actually, just hold up there a second - we haven’t actually got a map. A few moments ago all we had was a blank sheet of paper with nothing on it at all. Now we have chosen a destination. We have a blank piece of paper with a black spot on it. That is not a map.

Some bright spark suggested that we jot down our life goals on post-it notes and stick them on the wall: to own a Ferrari, to become a film star, or to eat a sticky toffee pudding. That isn’t a map either - they are black spots on my blank sheet of life, reminding me of places I’m not. Maps are funny things, our ancient ancestors drew them on parchment, cave walls, and bits of tree bark (the cave wall one didn’t survive too well due to its lack of portability) but why the fascination? What makes a map so special?

It shows us where we want to be.

It gives a choice of places we may want to be.

It shows where we are now.

It shows how far where we are now is from where we want to be.

It shows us the obstacles along the way.

It shows alternative routes that may be longer but avoid the obstacles (’ere be dragons).

A Map of The Real World

The problem for us and our hero is, that if read correctly, maps are also horribly truthful. To return to our post-it note-a Ferrari, to be a film star, or eat sticky toffee pudding - we stick it above our desk and when we glance up it gives us hope. When the instruction came from my publisher to write a book on persuasion, I was not asked to write a book on hope. If we take the average Joe and, as an outsider, we assess how realistic his post-it notes are, we may judge:

The Ferrari - not a hope

Film star - not a hope

Sticky toffee pudding - easy (but will make him fatter and even less likely to be a film star)

But if we now apply the map thing, we should achieve a different result - possibly even some kind of inevitability. The thing with maps is they are not simply a statement of destination or even a list of destinations. What they actually do is give us a number of destinations to choose from, and by looking at the map we can see where we are now, our current position and we can choose a destination and see the obstacles in between. When we see this clearly in black and white we can plan our journey - or if the obstacles are too daunting we could abandon the trip altogether and choose an easier destination. But without an accurate map none of these things are possible.

The Ferrari Map

Question: Where am I now?

Answer: I currently don’t own a car and have no driving licence. I do own my own house and the mortgage is half paid.

Now we can put that second point on the blank sheet - the one that states current position.