Leading from the Second Chair E-Book

Mike Bonem

• Herausgeber: John Wiley & Sons
• Kategorie: Religion und Spiritualität
• Serie: J-B Leadership Network Series
• Sprache: Englisch
• Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2005

Seitenzahl: 407

Beschreibung

Leading from the Second Chair will raise awareness of the need forstrong leaders in secondary positions. It will describe the valuethey can bring to their organization and to primary leaders whenthey are serving at their full potential. It will reshape the waythey view their role, with an emphasis on their own responsibilityas leaders. It recognizes the unique challenges and frustrations ofserving in a subordinate position and equips these leaders with theattitudes and skills that they will need to survive and thrive inthis new paradigm. Because of the scarcity of resources for second chair leaders,particularly those in the church, this book will offer a practicalway to improve the performance of any organization. LeadingCongregational Change discussed the importance of a "visioncommunity"--a diverse group of key members who discern andimplement the vision for a congregation--to guide thetransformation of a church. This work will extend the theme of anempowered leadership team as we explore how individual clergy andlaity can lead effectively.

Leseprobe

CONTENTS

Leadership Network Titles

About Leadership Network

Foreword

Preface

Chapter 1: Living in the Paradoxes

What Is a Second Chair Leader?

Three Paradoxes in the Second Chair

The Importance of Second Chair Leaders

Second Chair Leaders in the Church

The World’s Greatest Second Chair Leader

Chapter 2: Am I a Second Chair Leader?

Influence: The Leader’s Building Block

Unpacking the Definition

The Faces of the Second Chair

The Choices of the Second Chair

THE FIRST PARADOX: Subordinate-Leader

Chapter 3: Taking It from the Top

A Biblical Standard

What Is Subordination?

The Right Relationship

A Foundation of Trust

The Benefits of a Right Relationship

The Consequences of a Wrong Relationship

A Final Tip

Chapter 4: Crossing the Line

Finding the Line

Crossing the Line

Changing the Line

Living with the Line

A Word to First Chairs on the Subordinate-Leader Paradox

Reduce the Gap

Clarify Roles

Build Trust

Develop Relationships

Model Your Faith

THE SECOND PARADOX: Deep-Wide

Chapter 5: A Matter of Perspective

Second Chair or Second Tier?

The View from Inside a Silo

What Do You See?

Learning to See Deeper and Wider

Not Just the Big Picture

What Is My Job?

Chapter 6: Building the Team . . . One Relationship at a Time

Cross the Line Horizontally

The Value of Teams

Fostering Teams from the Second Chair

Speaking into the Organization

Building Your Own Teams

Some Traps to Avoid

The Second Chair as Servant Leader

Chapter 7: Putting It into Practice

Four Practices

Words of Caution

Deep and Wide Lay Leaders

A Word to First Chairs on the Deep-Wide Paradox

Expand Their Thinking

Encourage Real Teams

Foster a Stimulating Environment

THE THIRD PARADOX: Contentment-Dreaming

Chapter 8: Contentment in the Second Chair

A Picture of Contentment

Defining Contentment

The Tension of Contentment

Waiting in the Second Chair

Sources of Contentment

Challenges to Contentment

Chapter 9: Dreaming in the Second Chair

Dream Stewardship

Dreaming with Your First Chair

Dreaming in Your Chair

Dreaming Beyond Your Chair

Chapter 10: Leaving the Second Chair

Before You Arrive . . .

“Should I Stay, or Should I Go?”

As You Go . . .

A Word to First Chairs on the Contentment-Dreaming Paradox

Clarify Your Own Dreams

Listen at a Deeper Level

Make Room for a Shared Vision

Discern Between Contentment, Complacency, and Discouragement

Nurture and Release

Epilogue

The People Behind the Stories: Profiles of Second Chair Leaders

Bibliography

Acknowledgments

About the Authors

Index

To our wives, Bonnie and Julee, who have loved us as we are and have believed in our dreams

Copyright © 2005 by Mike Bonem and Roger Patterson. All rights reserved.

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All scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. NIV®. Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved.

Excerpt from Dan Reiland’s “The Pastor’s Coach” is used with permission.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Bonem, Mike, date.

Leading from the second chair: serving your church, fulfilling your role, and realizing your dreams / Mike Bonem and Roger Patterson; foreword by Greg L. Hawkins.—1st ed.

p. cm.

Includes bibliographical references and index.

ISBN-13: 978–0–7879–7739–9 (alk. paper)

ISBN-10: 0–7879–7739-X (alk. paper)

1. Christian leadership. 2. Leadership—Religious aspects—Christianity. I. Patterson, Roger, date. II. Title.

BV652.1.B67 2005

253—dc22

2005013526

LEADERSHIP NETWORK TITLES

Leading from the Second Chair: Serving Your Church, Fulfilling Your Role, and Realizing Your Dreams, by Mike Bonem and Roger Patterson

The Way of Jesus: A Journey of Freedom for Pilgrims and Wanderers, by Jonathan S. Campbell with Jennifer Campbell

Leading the Team-Based Church: How Pastors and Church Staffs Can Grow Together into a Powerful Fellowship of Leaders, by George Cladis

Organic Church: Growing Faith Where Life Happens, by Neil Cole

Leading Congregational Change Workbook, by James H. Furr, Mike Bonem, and Jim Herrington

Leading Congregational Change: A Practical Guide for the Transformational Journey, by Jim Herrington, Mike Bonem, and James H. Furr

The Leader’s Journey: Accepting the Call to Personal and Congregational Transformation, by Jim Herrington, Robert Creech, and Trisha Taylor

Culture Shift: Transforming Your Church from the Inside Out, by Robert Lewis and Wayne Cordeiro, with Warren Bird

A New Kind of Christian: A Tale of Two Friends on a Spiritual Journey, by Brian D. McLaren

The Story We Find Ourselves in: Further Adventures of a New Kind of Christian, by Brian D. McLaren

The Present Future: Six Tough Questions for the Church, by Reggie McNeal

A Work of Heart: Understanding How God Shapes Spiritual Leaders, by Reggie McNeal

The Millennium Matrix: Reclaiming the Past, Reframing the Future of the Church, by M. Rex Miller

Shaped by God’s Heart: The Passion and Practices of Missional Churches, by Milfred Minatrea

The Ascent of a Leader: How Ordinary Relationships Develop Extraordinary Character and Influence, by Bill Thrall, Bruce McNicol, and Ken McElrath

The Elephant in the Boardroom: Speaking the Unspoken About Pastoral Transitions, by Carolyn Weese and J. Russell Crabtree

ABOUT LEADERSHIP NETWORK

Since 1984, Leadership Network has fostered church innovation and growth by diligently pursuing its far-reaching mission statement: to identify, connect, and help high-capacity Christian leaders multiply their impact.

Although Leadership Network’s techniques adapt and change as the Church faces new opportunities and challenges, the organization’s work follows a consistent and proven pattern.

Leadership Network brings together entrepreneurial leaders who are focused on similar ministry initiatives. The ensuing collaboration—often across denominational lines—creates a strong base from which individual leaders can better analyze and refine their own strategies. Peer-to-peer interaction, dialogue, and sharing inevitably accelerate participants’ innovation and ideas. Leadership Network further enhances this process through developing and distributing highly targeted ministry tools and resources, including audio and video programs, special reports, e-publications, and online downloads.

With Leadership Network’s assistance, today’s Christian leaders are energized, equipped, inspired, and better able to multiply their own dynamic Kingdom-building initiatives.

Launched in 1996 in conjunction with Jossey-Bass (a Wiley imprint), Leadership Network Publications present thoroughly researched and innovative concepts from leading thinkers, practitioners, and pioneering churches. The series collectively draws from a range of disciplines, with individual titles offering perspective on one or more of five primary areas:

1. Enabling effective leadership

2. Encouraging life-changing service

3. Building authentic community

4. Creating Kingdom-centered impact

5. Engaging cultural and demographic realities

For additional information on the mission or activities of Leadership Network, please contact:

Leadership Network

2501 Cedar Springs, Suite 200

Dallas, TX 75201

[phone]

[email protected]

FOREWORD

His name was Fred.

For more than three years, we met almost every Thursday for lunch and then would take a walk. As we walked, I would debrief the week and describe the problems I was working on. We always had plenty to talk about, and many times our conversations got rather animated.

Actually, I was the animated one. Fred listened patiently as I explored the edges of my thoughts and feelings. He offered counsel and insights into our organization and its leader. He helped me understand how to apply my unique set of skills to the situations I faced. He was my coach, friend, and lifeline.

I have told Fred repeatedly that a main reason I have been able to serve as executive pastor of Willow Creek for almost ten years now is because he coached me during my very first years in the job. I absolutely know I would not have made it without his help.

Fred was effective because he had spent years as a first chair leader in the marketplace and he had served effectively for five years as a second chair leader in our church. He understood Willow Creek and its culture. He also understood and had worked for our senior pastor, Bill Hybels. (It didn’t hurt that Fred was, and still is, an incredibly fun person to be with.)

Over the years I have regularly gotten calls and e-mails from executive pastors asking for my advice on how to be more effective in the role. They have asked me what books or seminars have helped me over the years. I come up empty every time. I don’t know of anything that addresses the complexities and tensions that are unique to the second chair role. What I want to tell them is, “Get a Fred!” But folks like Fred are hard to come by.

This is why it is so exciting for me to introduce you to Mike Bonem, Roger Patterson, and Leading from the Second Chair.

Drawing on their years of second chair experience, as well as the experience of other skilled second chair leaders, Mike and Roger have captured the essence of the second chair role. It is about leading and managing your way through a set of paradoxes. The first time Mike shared the three key paradoxes with me, I immediately knew they were on to something; it rang so true to my experience.

I remember the day I figured out that Bill Hybels wanted me to boldly lead like a first chair leader, not just “manage” the church staff. Yet I had to do so knowing he could step in at any time and reverse a decision I had just made. This was counterintuitive to everything I had ever read about leadership. This is the paradox of subordinate-leader.

As executive pastor, I am expected to know something about everything going on at Willow Creek, and at the same time to provide hands-on leadership of a multimillion-dollar capital campaign, while offering world-class coaching to the high school pastor and a dozen other ministry leaders. The pressure is immense. This is the paradox of deep-wide.

Finally, there have been days when I dreamed intensely about the future of my church. Dreams so real that I am sure God would want them to come alive right away. Yet ultimately my dreams are just one voice in a larger community, under someone else’s leadership. I have had to learn to trust God and wait on Him patiently. This is the paradox of contentment-dreaming.

The insights from Mike and Roger are unique, and I believe they will benefit you or anyone in a second chair role, regardless of the size of your church or organization.

But beyond offering lots of practical advice, I believe the book has something else equally valuable. It offers hope, because, you see, the second chair role can be very lonely and there are many days you wish someone would just tell you that you’re not crazy. After reading Mike and Roger’s story, along with the stories of other second chair leaders, I don’t feel quite so alone. I feel understood, and I have more hope.

I pray that all of you can find a Fred in your life as you navigate your second chair role. But in the meantime, it gives me great joy to invite you to journey with Mike and Roger in Leading from the Second Chair.

Greg L. Hawkins

Executive Pastor

Willow Creek Community Church

PREFACE

When we began a monthly business outreach lunch series two years ago, we (coauthors Mike and Roger) knew we wanted to combine lessons in leadership with biblical principles. To be honest, the first several months were hit-or-miss. As we evaluated one of our misses, we realized we were teaching first chair leadership concepts to a group of middle managers. Shifting our approach to address their needs, we titled the series “Leading from the Second Chair.” Their immediate receptiveness told us we had struck a chord.

As we continued to develop the material, we could see that this topic interested many people in the church and the marketplace. Their interest was not due to a lack of material on the broad subject of leadership. Many outstanding resources address the general question, “How can I be a more effective leader?” What they wanted was to have something that addressed their unique challenges. They knew from experience that second chair leadership was different. They wanted to know how to navigate the obstacles they faced in this subordinate role and how to capitalize on the opportunities that seemed just beyond their grasp.

In truth, some of the positive feedback to our original presentations was simply due to our acknowledgment of these issues. We found an audience that wanted validation of their concerns and challenges and that wanted to look forward optimistically to the future. It is in this spirit that we offer this work. It is intended to be a practical and encouraging book for those who faithfully serve in a variety of second chair roles in churches, judicatories, and businesses. You do not need another “how to be a leader” book. You want to improve your leadership with resources that recognize how your role is different from that of senior pastor, executive director, bishop, or CEO. We hope you will find the affirmation and instruction that you need as you read the stories and principles in these pages.

Written from the Second Chair

A book about leading from the second chair should be written by second chair leaders. We both serve in second chair roles at West University Baptist Church, Roger as the associate pastor and Mike as the minister of discipleship. Roger has also served as the student minister of this congregation and another. Mike’s prior experience offers a different perspective on the second chair. He has been a second chair leader in business, a consultant to businesses and congregations, and a lay leader in the congregations where he was a member. In our formal and informal education and all of our volunteer and vocational experiences, we have sought to improve as leaders. More important, we have endeavored to serve God’s Kingdom by offering our best to the churches in which He has placed us.

West University Baptist is a seventy-seven-year-old congregation in an affluent neighborhood near the center of Houston. Like most churches with a long history, West University has experienced many seasons of blessing and growth, but it has also had to deal with periods of decline and crisis. From 1980 to 1999, West University was in a period of steady decline, with average weekend attendance falling by 40 percent. Many factors contributed to this slow erosion of a once-vibrant congregation.

In 1996, the congregation called Barry Landrum as its senior pastor. Roger came on board in 1997 as the student minister. Mike and his family joined the church in 1998, and he joined the staff in 2001 after leaving his business consulting career. During the five years from 1999 to 2004, God richly blessed West University Baptist and the downward trend reversed. Average attendance has now increased by 94 percent, and many other signs of congregational health are evident. We do not say this to take credit for the “success” of the church; we give God alone glory for the quantitative results and, more important, the changed lives. Nor are we saying that we were the only second chair leaders at West University during these years. The church has been faithfully served by our colleagues on the staff and by a host of lay leaders, too many to name. In fact, this broad group of second chair leaders underscores one of the themes of this book. When a group of leaders is willing to be used by God and is unified in following His vision, exciting things happen.

The ideas and recommendations in this book grow out of our own experiences as second chair leaders, as fellow travelers and learners in the journey of leadership. The simplistic snapshot of West University Baptist presented here may leave the impression that we have enjoyed unqualified success and an easy journey. There have been many joyous moments and ample victories, and we feel blessed to work in such a positive environment.

But there have also been many struggles. We had “great ideas” that failed—some that never got off the ground because they were not supported by the first chair, and others that did get off the ground and should not have. There were times when we bridled at the restraints imposed by our positions. At other times, we stepped too close to the line where constructive dissent becomes insubordination. We had to negotiate (and renegotiate) working arrangements, apologize for missteps, and accept solutions that we thought were less-than-ideal. Leading from the second chair has not been easy for us, but it has still been one of the most rewarding seasons of our lives.

Beyond Our Experiences

The lessons and principles embodied in this book are not limited to our experiences. We are indebted to a number of second chair leaders who shared their stories—both positive and negative—as we developed this project. Our conversation with more than a dozen individuals, all of whom have significant second chair experience, added depth and richness to our work. Steve Ahlquist, Tom Billings, Kelli Caskey, Gary Ferbet, Dena Harrison, Greg Hawkins, Ric Hodgin, Bob Johnson, Dian Kidd, Kim Miller, Preston Mitchell, Robert Moore, Dan Reiland, Warren Schuh, Glenn Smith, Robin Smith, and Geoff Surratt have all learned valuable lessons in the second chair and were glad to pass them along to others. More information on these second chair leaders is in the back of this book.

As you will see in our definition, a second chair leader does not have to fit a particular mold or hold a particular title, and this was certainly true for the individuals with whom we spoke. Beyond the common denominator of the second chair, they had little in common in their backgrounds and roles. They served in small and large churches, judicatories, and other organizations, and they covered the spectrum of denominations. They were men and women. Some saw the second chair as their lifelong calling, while others saw it as a step on their way to a first chair role. Some were not sure where God might lead them. Many had titles that clearly indicated their second chair role, but not all did.

Our outside interviews did more than furnish interesting stories. They confirmed the challenges of second chair leadership, and they validated our framework. Being in the second chair is the ultimate leadership paradox. It is the paradox of being a leader and a subordinate, having a deep role and a wide one, and being content with the present while continuing to dream about the future. Some may say it is impossible to do all these things, but we found that effective second chair leaders embrace these extremes. Those who thrive in this role, whether for a season or for the long run, learn to live with the tension that this creates. It is the tensions and paradoxes of second chair leadership that we explore in this book.

A Word to First Chairs

This book is written with second chair leaders in mind, but it will also be a useful tool for those in the first chair. If you are the senior pastor or executive director or are in some other top role, we hope you will gain new insights into your second chairs’ attitudes and actions. Most of you sat in a second chair role at one time, but you may have forgotten what it was like. Perhaps the ideas presented on these pages will start a dialogue between the two of you, a dialogue that will benefit you, the second chair, and your ministry as a whole.

Each paradox concludes with a special section called “A Word to First Chairs.” Here we apply the principles of the paradox to the role of the first chair. Some first chairs are missing the benefit and support of a capable second chair because they are hesitant to allow the latter to lead. For each paradox, you can take steps that will be of great benefit for your subordinates. But before you take these steps, you need to decide if you are willing for your direct reports to be true leaders, if you are ready to release them to the challenge at hand. Your second chairs are living with the tensions of the paradoxes. We want to encourage you to help them thrive, rather than just survive, in their role.

• • •

Tension and paradox are not necessarily bad. They are a reality we live with. They force us to stretch and reexamine our assumptions. Once we recognize them, they can propel us to a place of greater success. If you are in the second chair, you have not been called to a place of comfort; you have been called to a place of leadership. As you learn and grow in this experience, you have the opportunity to become more effective as a leader and to be used by God in a powerful way. We hope that you will be encouraged today to be the leader that God has called you to be, and that much Kingdom fruit will result from your faithful commitment.

CHAPTER 1

LIVING IN THE PARADOXES

The second chair is a complex and challenging role to fill, but you probably already know that. You understand the tension of leadership and the high-stakes game that goes along with it. Since you have picked up this book, you know that serving in the second chair involves seasons of frustration and stress as you try to follow your senior leader. Because of your position and your natural temperament, you cannot be passive about the future of your church or organization. At the same time, your position seems to limit your ability to change things for the better. This book is written for you, if you are looking for hope and direction as you live with this sense of urgency and passion.