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- Herausgeber: John Wiley & Sons
- Kategorie: Ratgeber
- Sprache: Englisch
A safe place of calm, reflection, and healing as you navigate through life's challenges and find your way home to yourself.
In Let It Settle, veteran professional coach and mindfulness leader Michael Galyon delivers a calm space you can call upon when faced with moments of unrest and overwhelm. The book offers insights into your experiences and emotions that confirm you do not face life alone and provides you with tools and guided meditations you can use to navigate through your experiences to a centered space from which healing is possible.
In the book, you'll find a series of consequential moments that commonly induce stress, worry, overwhelm, anxiety, and fear. Each section highlights a step on the path from unsettled to settled—like finding calm, coming home to yourself, and honoring connection—and walks you through the mindfulness-based tools, daily habits, and guided meditations that will help move you through life's most challenging moments and take you from chaos to calm.
You'll also find:
- Experiential learning techniques that rely on proven methods you can put into daily practice
- A safe space you can go when the time is right for you to begin addressing the issues affecting you
- A source of validation that confirms the value of your emotions and experiences
An effective and hands-on resource for busy professionals, academics, students, athletes, and anyone else doing their best to confront the challenges life constantly throws at us, Let It Settle is an extraordinary ally in the quest to see clearly and determine with confidence your next best step.
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Seitenzahl: 310
Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2024
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Table of Contents
Cover
Table of Contents
Title Page
Copyright
Dedication
Preface: Unsettled
Introduction
How This Book Is Organized
How to Use This Book’s Tools
PART 1: Finding Calm
1 Letting It Settle
Understanding the Power of Letting It Settle
Learning to Settle
Grounding in the Present Moment
Moving Beyond Preschool
The Process of Letting It Settle
Calm Kit Tool #1: 5-4-3-2-1 Calming Technique for Anxiety
2 Easing Anxiety
Introducing Mindfulness
Experiencing Mindfulness
Implementing Mindfulness
The Process of Easing Anxiety
Calm Kit Tool #2: Body Scan
3 Facing Fear
Honing in on Your Fears
Implementing Somatic Therapies
Fear versus Denial
The Process of Facing Fear
Calm Kit Tool #3: Butterfly Hug
4 Meditations and Daily Habits for Finding Calm
Meditations for Finding Calm
Daily Habits for Finding Calm
PART 2: Coming Home to Yourself
5 Listening In
Listening in the Stillness
Battling the Gremlin Thoughts
Clearing the Noise
Cultivating an Awareness of Thought
The Process of Listening In
Calm Kit Tool #4: Gremlin Discovery Technique
6 Cultivating Self-Love
What Is Self-Love?
Finding Space for Love
A Reference Point for Love
Visualizing Love
Connecting to Self-Love
Calm Kit Tool #5: Self-Love Guided Visualization
7 Letting Go
Holding On
The Process of Letting Go
Calm Kit Tool #6: Calm Space Visualization
8 Heading Home
Finding Home Within
Heading Home
The Process of Heading Home
Calm Kit Tool #7: Self-Compassion Journal
9 Meditations and Daily Habits for Coming Home to Yourself
Meditations for Coming Home to Yourself
Daily Habits for Coming Home
PART 3: Honoring Connection
10 Understanding Empathy
The Importance of Perspective
Empathy in Action
Empathetic Inquiry
Building Connection
The Process of Understanding Empathy
Calm Kit Tool #8: Nonjudgment Practice
11 Navigating Anger
Unharnessed Anger
Recognizing Anger
Clarifying Intentions
Allowing Anger
Investigating Anger
Deciding What’s Best
The Process of Navigating Anger
Calm Kit Tool #9: Anger RAID Meditation
12 Leading with Love
Understanding Loving-Kindness
Passing It Forward
The Process of Leading with Love
Calm Kit Tool #10: Loving-Kindness (Metta) Meditation
13 Finding Forgiveness
Uncovering the Dragon
Creating a New Vision
Freedom Found
The Process of Finding Forgiveness
Calm Kit Tool: Forgiveness Meditation
14 Meditations and Daily Habits for Honoring Connection
Meditations for Connection
Daily Habits for Connection
Final Thoughts: Settled
Lessons Learned
Lessons Learned from Honoring Connection
Journeying On
About the Author
Index
End User License Agreement
Guide
Cover
Table of Contents
Title Page
Copyright
Dedication
Preface: Unsettled
Introduction
Begin Reading
Final Thoughts: Settled
About the Author
Index
End User License Agreement
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Let It Settle
DAILY HABITS to MOVE YOU from CHAOS to CALM
MICHAEL GALYON
Copyright © 2024 by John Wiley & Sons, Inc. All rights reserved. All rights, including for text and data mining, AI training, and similar technologies, are reserved.
Published by John Wiley & Sons, Inc., Hoboken, New Jersey.Published simultaneously in Canada.
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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Names: Galyon, Michael, author.
Title: Let it settle : daily habits to move you from chaos to calm / Michael Galyon.
Description: Hoboken, New Jersey : Wiley, [2024] | Includes index.
Identifiers: LCCN 2024025043 (print) | LCCN 2024025044 (ebook) | ISBN 9781394196142 (hardback) | ISBN 9781394196166 (adobe pdf) | ISBN 9781394196173 (epub)
Subjects: LCSH: Calmness. | Mindfulness (Psychology) | Meditation.
Classification: LCC BF575.C35 G36 2024 (print) | LCC BF575.C35 (ebook) | DDC 158.1/3—dc23/eng/20240705
LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2024025043
LC ebook record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2024025044
Cover Design: WileyCover Image: © nadtytok/iStock/Getty Images
For you
Calm Kit Tools
Tool
Chapter
#1: 5-4-3-2-1 Calming Technique for Anxiety
1
#2: Body Scan
2
#3: Butterfly Hug
3
#4: Gremlin Discovery Technique
5
#5: Self-Love Guided Visualization
6
#6: Calm Space Visualization
7
#7: Self-Compassion Journal
8
#8: Nonjudgment Practice
10
#9: Anger RAID Meditation
11
#10: Loving-Kindness (Metta) Meditation
12
#11: Forgiveness Meditation
13
Meditations
Meditation
Chapter
Body Scan Meditation
4
Four-Point Breathing Meditation
4
Safe Space Meditation
4
Mindful Awareness of Thought Meditation
9
Self-Love Meditation
9
Heart-Centered Meditation
9
Anger RAID Meditation
14
Loving-Kindness (Metta) Meditation
14
Forgiveness Meditation
14
Daily Habits
Habit
Chapter
Daily Practice of Mindful Awareness
4
Daily Mindfulness Breaks
4
Daily Stress Reduction Techniques
4
Daily Self-Reflection Practice
9
Daily Intention-Setting Practice
9
Daily Acts of Self-Care
9
Daily Exploration of Empathy
14
Daily Practice of Loving-Kindness
14
Daily Practice of Letting Go
14
Preface: Unsettled
I remember the love I felt from holding my grandmother’s hand and knowing how much I was cared for, the excitement of that first glimpse of the mountains from the backseat of our van on family road trips to Colorado, the anger that filled my body when my older brother teased me, the loneliness that came from being a shy kid without many friends, and the heartbreak that came from watching my mom walk out the door to start a new life away from us when I was nine. I felt everything so deeply, sometimes I didn’t know how to keep it inside my body. While it may not have been what little boys were supposed to do in those days, I was never too shy to feel everything and express it fully.
But on the day my mom left, something shifted. I had spent the morning listening to her preparations, packing up items that had been in our home my entire life and leaving empty spaces outlined in dust. I wasn’t entirely aware of what was going on, but I knew that this was different from other times she had left. There were many moments leading up to this day when I sat behind my closed bedroom door listening to raised voices and trying to figure out what was being said, praying that it would end so I could stop feeling so scared and everything would be OK. When my parents finally sat us down to let us know that she was leaving, I didn’t quite understand what it meant. It wasn’t until that day, watching her things leave with her, that I started to grasp what was happening.
When the last items were packed and she was ready to leave, my siblings and I lined up, and she hugged each of us good-bye. I was the last one to hug her, and by that time, the tears had started to fall. The weight of what was happening settled in, and being the sensitive boy that I was, I let myself feel everything. When she looked and saw the tears rolling down my face, she turned to me, holding back her own tears, and softly said, “No more tears. I need you to be my brave little soldier.” Then she walked out the door, and my tears stopped for many years.
After decades of work on both of our parts and a beautiful reconciliation, I can see now that her words were more for her than for me. The intense pain of a choice that she knew was necessary but impacted so many was too much, and she just wanted her little boy to be OK without her. But at that moment, the message I took away was that feelings I once felt so freely were no longer safe. For years I held on to those words and did everything I could to distance myself from the intense emotions I felt and be the “brave little soldier” I thought I needed to be. That abandonment of my emotions left everything in my life seeming unsettled. No matter what I was experiencing, there was a deep longing to escape it. I yearned to escape the pain and discomfort of difficult moments as well as the moments of joy and happiness for fear that the fall from those emotional heights would hurt too badly. I constantly tried to control situations to find a place of neutrality—a space where I could exist devoid of emotion. That sensitive boy who felt everything suddenly became a man who sought to feel nothing.
There were many ways to achieve this state of nothingness, and behind closed doors and away from the image of the brave little soldier I was sharing with the world, I experienced almost all of them to excess. Through a cycle of restriction and abuse of food, hiding behind career success, alcohol, and countless other addictions, distractions, and obsessions, I tried to distance myself from the emotions that raged in me. I was constantly searching for the next thing to take away this unsettled feeling, but it always came up short. Even after sobriety, I leaned into more socially acceptable obsessions like fitness, yoga, and meditation. I wish that I could say my pursuit of mindfulness and meditation was an attempt to deepen my experience of life and begin to feel into it all, but initially it was another form of escape. It was almost as if the stillness and silence of a meditation replaced the dissociative quality of the coping mechanisms I had relied on earlier to escape those feelings. As embarrassing as it is to admit, for many years my practice existed solely to avoid feeling.
But eventually the stillness and silence of meditation and the conscious awareness provided by mindfulness allowed for the walls surrounding these emotions to begin to come down. Over time I was able to settle into a space where I could let them be present, feel them, and finally begin to process what I had been avoiding for so long. To let everything settle, I had to first unlearn what had been taught to me and find my way back to that sensitive little boy. As with most things that enact change, it didn’t happen overnight. It was a process of deconstructing old beliefs, building new habits, and allowing myself to find calm amid the chaos.
The first belief that I had to deconstruct was that stoicism was a way to earn love. Throughout my life adults praised me for being that brave little soldier and for my ability to remain neutral in the face of any and all situations. I misconstrued this praise as love, and therefore created a firm belief that the more stoic I was, the more love I would receive. It made perfect sense and often provided me with the feeling I was seeking, but the cost of burying my emotions became apparent as time went by. For years I would people-please, ignore my own feelings and needs, and become what others wanted me to be in fear that if my emotions slipped out, the love and attention I had received would be taken away. Stepping away from that pattern of behavior was terrifying and seemed impossible most days. When the conscious awareness of how I was showing up and the impact it was having on my life finally became clear to me, I knew that, to move forward, I needed to start connecting with my emotions and return home to myself.
On this journey home to myself, I tried countless forms of therapy, self-help seminars, books, religious teachings, and anything I could think of. Although many of them made an impact, the simplicity of awareness through mindfulness-based meditation and practices gave me the ability to start understanding myself on a deeper level and create choice for how I wanted to show up for myself in the world. Starting and ending each day in reflection and tuning in to my body, my breath, my thoughts, and my emotions allowed me to see who I was separate from the image I portrayed for others. It allowed me the opportunity to sit with feelings of discomfort, fear, and loneliness, and let them be present without judgment. It allowed me to recognize that it was safe to feel and that expressing those feelings would not keep others from loving me.
Over time, a deep sense of calm replaced the stoicism I had felt. I learned to remain calm in the face of fear, not in avoidance of it. As I started showing up for myself and connecting more deeply with the people in my life, I started to become aware of small reference points to confirm that there was safety in expression and that love didn’t disappear in the face of feelings. Once I was able to recognize that, I was able to begin to let it all settle and find my way forward.
Next I had to break down the belief that safety was possible only when hiding behind a mask of perceived perfection and when giving people only what they wanted from me. I thought I had to be the perfect doll for them to play with, to meet their needs, to understand them, and to create a space where conflict could not exist. The more I began to connect with myself and my emotions, I recognized that the connections in my life were dependent on a falsified version of peace. With that came resentment, unvoiced pain, and an inability to truly connect with people in my life. The process of deconstructing this belief took time and energy and required me to look at my own way of relating to the people in my life. It forced me to learn how to empathize on a deep level, to learn how to forgive, to learn how to be in conflict, and to learn how to love. It wasn’t one specific moment that taught me the lessons I needed to learn, but a collection of teachings spread over years that all culminated in my ability to take off the mask and enter into healthy relationships.
Finally, I needed to learn how to be connected with the world around me. I need to step away from the comfort of self-focus and let myself find a vision that served the world around me by simply showing up authentically and with purpose. Throughout my life I always tended to play small and place myself in a box. I was too scared to make noise or be seen, and I continually scanned the world to see how I could fit in but not stand out. I strove to learn the rules and carefully studied the actions of others to know what was expected of me. In doing so, I was denying a part of myself. Learning to come home to myself and connect to those closest to me allowed me finally to begin to let things flow through me, not from me. In that openness, I found a desire to create a kinder, calmer, and more connected world. When I shifted the focus from how I wanted to be perceived by others to how I wanted to show up for others, I was able to create that vision for my life and find ways to have that lead me forward with purpose and drive.
In service of that vision, I’ve devoted the last decade to helping others find their calm. My hope is that this book can be a source of inspiration and knowledge that will help guide you home to yourself and finally begin to let it all settle.
Michael GalyonMarch 2024
Introduction
I wish that I could say that with a few simple breaths and a focus on the present moment, you can solve all of life’s problems. In reality, finding calm amid the chaos is an ongoing process, and at times fear and anxiety will win the day. The intention of this book is not to simply gather the tools of mindfulness, find the right meditative practices, and create the perfect daily habits to reach a permanent place of peace. That place does not exist, and chaos will continue to creep into your life from time to time, regardless of the tools you discover within these pages.
My hope is that the tools, tips, and practices we’ll uncover together will give you the strength to keep moving through life no matter how many storms come your way. The information in this book is there to help you through whatever storm you’re facing right now. That storm may be a lack of calm within your life, a feeling of disconnection from yourself, or the difficulties that come from being in conflict with those you hold dearest. Whatever you are facing right now is a unique and personal journey, but I hope you can see yourself in some of the stories presented here and find some solace knowing you are not alone. There are things you can do to help you let it all settle and, for a moment, find some calm in the chaos.
How This Book Is Organized
I’ve broken the following pages into the three areas that led me on my path. They will help as you begin your journey of moving from chaos to calm.
Part 1
: Finding Calm
is about finding calm within your life and facing the inner blocks that are holding you back and keeping you stuck in unhealthy patterns.
Part 2
: Coming Home to Yourself
is about recognizing your unique and inherent goodness and connecting back with an authentic version of yourself.
Part 3
: Honoring Connection
is about creating deep and meaningful relationships with the people in your life and breaking through the blocks that may be standing in your way.
Chapters in each part of this book highlight some of life’s bigger challenges. The goal of these chapters is to provide you with specific tools, practices, or methods you can utilize as you move through the challenges outlined in the chapter. Using storytelling, I take you through my own personal experiences and through my work with clients to showcase these tools in action and show movement from one side of the challenge to the other.
All names, experiences, and events have been changed and do not represent any one person.
How to Use This Book’s Tools
Each chapter ends with a step-by-step guide on how to utilize the process outlined in the chapter in your own life. It also provides a specific tool that you can add to what I affectionately call your Calm Kit, an ever-growing collection of calming tools that you can pull from to help ground you back into the present moment and begin to find calm amid the chaos.
The chapters at the end of each of the three parts—Chapters 4, 9, and 14—contain written meditations to help you move through the challenges presented in each chapter in that part. Reach for these meditations in times of need or incorporate them into your daily practice.
Additionally, Chapters 4, 9, and 14 provide you with a set of daily habits to help keep you grounded and prevent you from straying too far from a centered space of calm and stillness. These daily habits, along with the exercises found at the end of each chapter that create your Calm Kit, serve as inspiration to turn to when you begin to lose your way.
Preparing for Meditation
Meditation offers a variety of benefits for both mental and physical well-being. Regular practice can significantly reduce stress by lowering cortisol levels and promoting relaxation. It enhances focus and concentration, leading to improved productivity and cognitive function. Emotionally, meditation fosters stability, resilience, and inner peace, alleviating symptoms of anxiety and depression. It has also been shown to deepen self-awareness, helping practitioners better understand thoughts, emotions, and behaviors.
The practice of meditation also aids in achieving better sleep quality by calming the mind and reducing racing thoughts. By strengthening the mind–body connection, meditation promotes holistic health and harmony between physical and mental states. Ultimately, meditation contributes to an overall improved quality of life by fostering mental clarity, emotional balance, and physical health.
A Note About Mindfulness-Based Practices
The mindfulness practices that I teach, including those rooted in Buddhist traditions, are adapted and practiced in a secular context. In secular mindfulness, the emphasis is on the practical application of mindfulness techniques for enhancing well-being, managing stress, and promoting emotional regulation; the aim is not to explore metaphysical realms or experiences, or religious or spiritual beliefs.
Although mindfulness-based practices originated in ancient traditions, secular mindfulness removes any religious or cultural context and focuses solely on the techniques themselves and their benefits. This approach allows individuals from diverse backgrounds to access and benefit from mindfulness without feeling the need to adhere to specific religious teachings or beliefs. By honoring and acknowledging the traditions from which these practices derive, while also offering them in a secular and accessible manner, I can ensure that mindfulness remains inclusive and applicable to all, regardless of their religious or cultural affiliations.
For beginners, sometimes the idea of meditation feels intimidating. The prospect of sitting in silence with one’s thoughts may evoke feelings of discomfort or uncertainty. However, it’s important to recognize that meditation doesn’t have to be complex or overwhelming. In fact, the simplicity of the practice is one of its greatest strengths.
At its core, meditation is about cultivating presence and awareness in the present moment. It’s not about emptying the mind or achieving a state of perfect calm; rather, it’s about observing the thoughts, sensations, and emotions that arise without judgment or attachment. Understanding this fundamental principle can help alleviate some of the anxiety beginners may feel about meditation.
To set yourself up for success with meditation, establish a consistent habit that fits into your daily routine. Start small, perhaps with just a few minutes of meditation each day, and gradually increase the duration as you become more comfortable with the practice. Choose a time and place where you can meditate without distractions, and experiment with different techniques to find what works best for you.
Consistency is key when it comes to meditation. Just like any other skill, meditation requires practice and patience to develop. By committing to regular meditation practice, you can gradually build your mindfulness muscle and begin to experience the benefits of meditation in your daily life.
It’s also important to approach meditation with an open mind and a sense of curiosity. Don’t be discouraged by the inevitable distractions or challenges that may arise during meditation. Instead, view them as opportunities for growth and learning. Remember that meditation is a journey, and each moment of practice brings you closer to greater clarity, peace, and self-awareness.
Consider these six steps to help you create a consistent practice of meditation:
Find your space.
Choose a quiet and comfortable space where you can practice meditation without distractions. This doesn’t need to be a dedicated meditation room, and you don’t need to purchase expensive meditation cushions. To this day I still sit on the edge of my couch for my meditation sessions. The important thing is to make sure that it’s somewhere where you feel relaxed and at ease.
Settle into a comfortable position.
Find a comfortable seated position on a cushion, chair, couch, or bench. Keep your back straight—place a cushion behind you if you need the support—and rest your hands gently in your lap. You can also lie down if that feels more comfortable, although be mindful not to fall asleep.
Close your eyes or soften your gaze.
During meditation, you can choose to either close your eyes or maintain a soft gaze looking downward without focusing specifically on anything, whichever feels most natural and safe for you. When I guide meditations, I tell people that it’s OK to meditate with open eyes, if closing their eyes does not feel safe or comfortable. If you choose to keep your eyes open, focus on a spot on the floor a few feet in front of you and allow your gaze to soften.
Take a few deep breaths.
Take a few deep breaths to center yourself and bring your awareness into the present moment. Inhale deeply through your nose, feeling your abdomen expand, and exhale fully through your mouth, releasing any tension or stress you may be holding onto. If you need more focus, you can simply track each breath by silently saying “I am aware of my inhale, I am aware of my exhale.”
Let go of expectations.
Release any expectations or judgments you may have about your meditation practice. Remember that there is no right or wrong way to meditate, and each session is going to be a completely unique experience. Simply allow yourself to be present with whatever arises, without trying to force or control your experience. And always remember that you are not a “bad meditator” if/when your mind begins to wander. Don’t think of meditation as requiring a blank mind but as a practice of awareness where you note the thoughts that arise and make the conscious choice to redirect your attention to the present moment (breath, body, senses, etc.).
Be patient and gentle with yourself.
Be patient and gentle with yourself as you navigate your meditation practice. Understand that meditation is a skill that takes time and practice to develop, and that progress may not always be linear. Treat yourself with kindness and compassion, and celebrate the fact that you are taking the time to invest in yourself during this time.
Cultivating Daily Habits
As you work toward finding a space of calm to return to, many practices, meditations, and techniques will prove beneficial on your journey, but don’t overwhelm yourself by trying to add too much too soon. A manageable daily practice with simple habits and tools will serve you well in the long run. The daily habits that you’ll find within this book are suggestions to help you move through specific challenges and can be added into your daily practice as needed. Remember that consistency is key; even just a few minutes of meditation or mindfulness each day can make a significant difference over time. Be patient with yourself and allow your practice to evolve naturally, adjusting as needed to suit your needs and preferences. With dedication and perseverance, you’ll gradually cultivate a greater sense of calm, clarity, and well-being in your life.
I want to give you a gentle reminder as you work your way through the book: None of this is easy, but experiencing life instead of trying to control it is a beautiful thing, and living fully aware and present for every moment in your life is a gift worth giving to yourself. Let’s get you there.
PART 1Finding Calm
1Letting It Settle
A Gentle Reminder
There’s a lot going on in the world today, and if you’ve been feeling a heightened sense of emotion lately, I want you to know that you’re not alone. The demands on adults today personally and professionally can be overwhelming, because we exist in a time when a constant stream of information tells us what is wrong, warns of dangers and threats, and puts us all in a state of confusion and worry. You’re expected to be so much for so many, and often it can feel like no matter how hard you try, it’s never enough. All of this contributes to a feeling of unease, and the level of anxiety that exists daily can be overwhelming. Given everything going on around you, you may have no concept of calm. The thought of stillness may seem foreign, and while you know that something needs to shift, you don’t know how to move yourself toward a life of ease.
Most of us share a feeling of unrest, unease, and uncertainty about how to handle our emotions. It’s a feeling that we’re too much, too little, too angry, or too scared; that we’re living in the extremes and never knowing who we are supposed to be. Beneath that unsettled feeling is a desire for peace, for stillness, for calm.
Finding a space of calm is more necessary than ever. Between information overload brought on by social media and 24-hour news sources, increased demands for productivity, a breakdown of the boundaries between personal and professional life, and rising levels of stress and anxiety, it’s essential to carve out moments of calm to preserve our mental and emotional health. I know it may not seem possible right now, but my hope is that by exploring the tools and techniques presented in this book, you can begin to find a way to connect back to yourself, become aware of what’s going on internally, and gain the strength to be gentle with yourself through it all. None of this is easy, and some of the tools and techniques I share may not work for you. Finding calm is a process of trial and error and requires a great deal of patience. You’re asking yourself to rewrite decades of learned behavior and beliefs, so if you find yourself frustrated, that’s OK. But your peace is worth fighting for, and my hope is that together we can get you one step closer toward the peaceful existence you deserve.
Understanding the Power of Letting It Settle
A signature phrase that I often use while guiding meditations and in my coaching sessions is “let it settle.” I’m often asked to explain the exact meaning of the phrase. It’s an invitation for you to allow your mind to find a place of rest, your body to relax, and your emotions to become less charged. The meaning of “let it settle” is quite simple, but where the phrase comes from is a much more interesting story. It doesn’t come from any tenets of mindfulness or training that I received; rather, it comes from my time spent in a preschool classroom.
Before gaining my certifications as a professional coach and a mindfulness instructor, I spent more than a decade working with children. I often tell clients that the majority of what I know and what I pass on to them comes from my time in a preschool classroom. The work that we do as adults to find emotional regulation is similar to working with children, who are bundles of emotion trying to navigate through life.
It was in a preschool classroom where I learned the power of letting it settle from a three-year-old named Jack. I met Jack and his family on the first day of his new preschool separation program. This was the first time that Jack was going to be away from his family for an extended period of time, so it was a big deal for him. He walked in holding his mom’s hand, and his big blue eyes lit up as he saw the room filled with color and toys and kids. I greeted them and introduced myself, pointing out all the areas Jack could explore. While still holding on to his mom’s hand, he went over to the brightly colored alphabet rug and began to play. He reached for a car and started to zoom it along the rug, making sure to yell “beep beep” when he passed anyone and to make crashing noises as he bumped his toy into the car of another child. The two boys laughed as they began to play together, slowly venturing away from the adults but glancing back every few moments to make sure that the mothers were still there. After a few minutes, when Jack seemed fully engaged and
