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'These strategies worked for me and I know they can work for you too.' Andrea HayesDo you dream of creating a change in your life but feel stuck or unsure where to start? Andrea Hayes' inspirational and practical journal will help you clarify what you really want for the year ahead so you can begin to manifest the life of your dreams.Inside, you will find a twelve-step strategy to help you identify your goals and focus on each one, month by month.With space provided for monthly journaling, helpful exercises for overcoming your own personal mental blocks, and Andrea's free hypnosis downloads designed to let you relax and access your most authentic self, this book will help you to stop drifting and form new habits that will transform your life.'A once-in-a-generation book that comes along and suddenly your whole life seems to slot into place. There's inspiration on every page and it's brimming with wonderful, life-affirming messages you'll want to live by. Everyone I know is getting a copy.' Claudia Carroll'Andrea's overall positivity is infectious. This book is the first page of the rest of your life.' Brendan Courtney
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Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2016
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My LifeGoalsJournal
Wellness strategies totransform your life
ANDREA HAYES
GILL BOOKS
To Brooke
Contents
Cover
Title Page
Dedication
A MESSAGE FROM ANDREA
Month 1: BEING THE TRUE YOU AND GOAL SETTING
Month 2: LOVE AND SELF-CARE
Month 3: THOUGHTS CREATE YOUR REALITY
Month 4: CONSCIOUS EATING AND HEALTHY LIVING
Month 5: SELF-TALK
Month 6: MANIFESTATION AND ABUNDANCE
Month 7: MINDFULNESS AND NATURE
Month 8: APPRECIATION OF LIFE
Month 9: STRESS-FREE LIVING
Month 10: STILLNESS AND SLEEP
Month 11: SURRENDER AND LET GO
Month 12: FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS
YOUR LIFE GOALS JOURNAL – THE NEW YOU
Acknowledgements
Copyright
About the Author
About Gill Books
A MESSAGE FROM ANDREA
My Health Journey
I’m a big believer in setting goals. The first step in goal-setting is to have absolute belief and faith in the process. A journal can be a powerful tool for achieving your goals. The simple practice of writing forces you to reflect on your life, and writing down your thoughts can be a cathartic process. I have created a system that works for me and I know it will work for you, too.
Central to my success is a belief in my ability to absolutely transform my life. Making changes in life is not about one-off actions, it is about forming new habits to transform your life. If you follow the month-by-month strategies, I know you can achieve great change. If you want to succeed in any area of your life – personal, professional or even your health – you need to set goals, because without goals you can lack focus.
For me it all started when I made it my intention and goal to live pain free.
Some of you may have read snippets of my story in the press and perhaps have picked up a copy of my memoir, Pain-Free Life, and will probably know that I have had ‘back pain’. To say it was just back pain minimises it and diminishes the far reach of a complex pain problem that I was desperately trying to manage and, in many ways, keep secret while maintaining a sometimes gruelling TV and media career.
My pain started when I was very young. I have always been, according to my big brother, a sickly sister and have spent various periods of time in hospital since childhood with ear, nose and throat problems. But my ENT issues didn’t really hold me back growing up, and I didn’t feel any different from anyone else. However, unlike most other people, I have lived with pain in my upper body for most of my life.
My pain story continued into my teens and became much worse after another long hospital stay. I had suspected meningitis and, after a lumbar puncture, I remember feeling the start of what was to become persistent lower back and coccyx pain. But I was a growing teenager and this was passed off as women’s problems.
In my twenties I searched for answers for my mysterious pain. I wanted a diagnosis, I wanted a cure – in truth, I wanted help, support and answers. I just wanted to be believed that my pain was real.
Over the years, I took a concoction of medications to manage the pain, threw a potpourri of alternative solutions into the mix and underwent medical procedures but, sadly, the pain persisted – often not as strongly but it was always there.
The anguish and sheer suffering that living in pain causes a person is devastating, and it tore away at the very fabric of my life. On a personal level I felt like a failure. Why couldn’t I fix this problem – was I the problem? It was a constant torture that I endured, mentally and physically, daily.
Then one day everything changed. Sometimes we need a push, a nudge from the universe to trust our own inner wisdom to make things happen.
For me, a simple phone call was the catalyst to propel me to follow my own journey to wellness and healing. After spending more than half of my life looking for answers and a name for the constant pain that I have felt since my teens, suddenly, in one moment, had a simple phone call given me an explanation?
It was a Monday morning in December 2013. I was sitting at my desk in TV3, feeling the pressure of a hectic schedule. I was mid-shoot for a one-hour festive TV special called Coming Home for Christmas – the whole show had to be filmed, edited and delivered to air on Christmas Eve. Coupled with that I was busy with my weekly radio show on Sunshine 106.8 and voice-over work, and, as it was December, I had also volunteered to cover a few afternoon shifts on a charity radio station called Christmas FM. I was snowed under.
A number flashed up on my mobile and I recognised it immediately as St Vincent’s Hospital. Much to my surprise it was my doctor.
I have been attending Dr Paul Murphy for many years for ongoing pain-management procedures but I had never received a call from him, so in hindsight I should probably have listened more carefully or maybe even asked a few questions, but I really couldn’t take in quite what he was saying at the time. He told me a rare brain disorder had shown up on my recent MRI scan, and, as if that wasn’t troubling enough, the MRI showed more cervical disc degeneration – we would need to discuss it when I saw him that Friday. Perhaps it was shock that made my responses monosyllabic, but, apart from ‘Yes, I’ll see you Friday’, I didn’t say anything – I did manage to scrawl ‘Chiari malformation 1’ on the pad in front of me, though.
The phone call was brief but the impact was huge, not because of the diagnosis but because of what I did next. Instinct kicked in and, although I didn’t know anything about the condition Dr Murphy had just outlined, I knew I needed to make a change. So I did something unplanned and very out of character – I asked my line manager in TV3 if I could apply for three months’ leave.
And the chain reaction began.
I received an email confirming I could take leave starting in January 2014. Knowing I would have this time off seemed to get me through December. During those weeks I ignored my new diagnosis and what it would mean for my life and my family. But something seismic had shifted inside: I realised I felt numb to everything going on around me; I was just going through the motions, feeling totally out of balance. In truth, I was at breaking point. Taking pill after pill to mask my pain, I desperately struggled through work only to crash and burn at the end of every week. I had no quality of life. I was hopelessly trying to stay afloat despite the tsunami of excess – too much pain, too much work, too much stress. Life was becoming too much and I felt I was drowning.
Realising this was a breakthrough in itself. That phone call made me take stock and really look at myself and my life. However it wasn’t until after I met a neurosurgeon who explained the brain surgery recommended for my condition that the wheels of change were really set in motion. I knew I didn’t want surgery to be part of my future.
I knew I couldn’t change my destination overnight but I needed to change direction and explore calmer waters. At that stage I had no idea of, and I really wasn’t prepared for, the voyage of discovery and transformation I was about to embark on, guided only by my desire and faith in a higher power that I could manage my pain and achieve greater health, happiness and overall wellness and balance.
In January 2014 I took three months’ leave from TV3 and began a much more important daily job – self-care. I had spent my whole working career being dedicated and determined, achieving and completing many goals with real passion. So I decided to apply those same qualities to the well-being of my mind, body and soul. It wasn’t all calm waters – change represents uncertainty, whether it’s planned or unplanned, and it can be very uncomfortable. Now, when I speak at events and meet other pain sufferers – whether their pain is emotional or physical – I suggest they do what I did and embrace that unease, using it to re-examine their lives and consider what direction really matters most. For me, it was my health.
My advice is to listen to the inner you and make a shift – be willing to let go of what no longer serves you. Situations, relationships, jobs, hobbies and places all have expiry dates. If something no longer feels good don’t be afraid to get rid of it. Sometimes by letting go we set ourselves free to explore and manifest brilliant new possibilities. This book is designed to help you do that, to focus on your goals, to develop, step by step, changes in your life that will help you reach those goals and transform your life and, I hope, overcome the pain, whatever its source. At the end of each section I have included extracts from my own personal journal so you can see how journaling helped me in each of the areas I’ve outlined.
As part of my journey I have trained as a clinical hypnotherapist and have designed specific recordings that will help you access both relaxation and your inner self to aid your progress. Use these as much or as little as you need to – if you’ve never listened to anything like this before, let this be your first step to change. It will take one minute of your life and will greatly enhance the benefits of this journal. As you turn the pages, come with me on a journey to wellness and fulfilment.
Andrea x
JOURNALING FOR CHANGE
‘A problem shared is a problem halved’
Do you have a dream about harvesting a new future but don’t know where to begin? A journal is the perfect place to manifest change and is an excellent place for you to start.
Through using this journal you will see yourself grow into a new, stronger you over time. I have been journaling for many years and I cannot explain the phenomenon of my life goals journal except to say this: it works. There is plenty of evidence that writing down your feelings produces positive therapeutic effects on your overall health, and this journal can help you harness that, giving you space you to write your own main goals for the year ahead plus how you are feeling on a week-to-week basis. Nothing changes unless you do, so to truly experience change in your life you need to stick to the practice of journaling and make it your intention to write every day.
Think about this journey like planting a new garden; decide now which seeds of change you want to grow. Start by choosing twelve easy goals or dreams you want to manifest or harvest over the next year: focus on one each month, follow the plan of journaling weekly and do the work!
Making a commitment to complete the tasks and enjoy the process of growing will result in a new, stronger, more authentic you. When you see the little green shoots of change in your own life appear it will be so exciting – you might have to dig deep to root out any old habits that need to be replaced with new ones, but this journal work will be the genesis of a new you.
Better still, what begins to bloom in this journal will add boundless colour and creativity to your life and the seeds will continue to grow every year. Once you learn how to use these tools, you will have them for life and can keep using them.
In this journal, you can jot down your goals for the year ahead and easily review them, seeing how you are feeling as each month passes. Using the accompanying monthly hypnosis relaxation, you can focus on your wellness in the alpha-relaxation state of mind – the state where you are totally relaxed and open to growth and change – and this will truly solidify your new goals in your psyche.
Writing your intention to live well will anchor it in place – you can’t edit what isn’t written, and you cannot read over empty pages, so even if you think your writing isn’t very good, keep going. You are the only person who will see this book so never worry about being judged for its contents.
HOW TO USE THIS JOURNAL
Spaces have been left throughout each chapter for you to fill in, or you can start your own separate journal and use this book as inspiration. This is your sacred space to write your personal manifesto for the life you want to create. Don’t let anyone else influence what you want to achieve or what you write in this journal.
Be honest, be truthful, be yourself, be consistent and be willing to allow change to manifest. Share your deepest thoughts, dreams, ideas and true emotions, no matter how weird or self-indulgent they might seem; this journal is for you, no one else, so leave judgement outside these pages. You might be as surprised as me! By opening up about my true feelings about my health and my desire to be well, wonderful new opportunities opened up for me. I believe they will for you too.
Enjoy writing your journal. It is very cathartic – think of it as personal therapy. I was so surprised by how much I learned about myself in the process, how I found my authentic self and how powerful that was.
Inspired space. These are little inspirational prompt boxes for you to fill in. You can write just one word or a short phrase to describe your present thoughts. For example, what are you feeling right now as you read this journal?
WHEN SHOULD YOU USE THIS JOURNAL?
In order to make writing about your journey a habit, it helps to write at a specific time each day. Everyone has different demands on their time and different schedules but it is important to allocate time with your journal, ‘me time’, and establish that as part of your routine.
An ideal time to write in your journal is first thing in the morning, as soon as you wake up. This can help you set the tone for the day and get into a mindset aligned with your wellness intentions. But choose a time that works for you – perhaps just before bed is better, or during your coffee break?
Even when you don’t have time to write, you can still take a few moments to review your goals and wellness journey. And even when you are out and about, you can take time to listen to the monthly relaxations – listen to them on your phone if you are on the bus on your way to work or waiting in the car while collecting children from school. Ensure you take a moment out of your busy day to centre yourself – this will bring you closer to your sacred place of wellness.
Self-hypnosis
After my diagnosis of Chiari malformation 1 in December 2013, I explored everything I could about the condition. In simple terms it is a neurological disorder where part of the brain, the cerebellum (or more specifically the cerebellar tonsils), descends out of the skull into the spinal area. This results in compression of parts of the brain and spinal cord and disrupts the normal flow of cerebrospinal fluid. There was a strong chance that this rare malformation could be the underlying cause of my lifelong pain.
I felt that if I had something wrong with my brain, I should start looking for a solution from within, rather than invasive surgery or additional drugs, as my first option.
I was inspired by stories of spontaneous remission and ‘miraculous’ healing; I researched the phenomenon of the placebo effect – could our brains be so powerful that we can convince ourselves to recover from an illness by taking a harmless, inert substance like a sugar pill? Could the answer to my pain relief be somehow within my own mind?
The phrase ‘being of two minds’ summarises the mental battle that lay ahead. My conscious day-to-day mind was screaming at me that I had a diagnosis of a brain problem and chronic pain that wasn’t going away. Coming to terms with this was a huge issue.
I had to remind myself that studies show that we use only a small percentage of our conscious mind for logic and reasoning. The real work is done in the subconscious mind, the part responsible for all of your involuntary actions. I knew that in order to harness the power of my mind to achieve my goals, I needed to understand how both the conscious and the subconscious mind work together and take advantage of their combined power. According to Dr Emmanuel Donchin, Director of the Laboratory for Cognitive Psychophysiology at the University of Illinois: ‘An enormous portion of cognitive activity is non-conscious. Figuratively speaking, it could be 99 percent; we probably will never know precisely how much is outside awareness.’
So if the conscious part of my brain was merely the captain of the ship shouting out the orders, the main action was taking place deep down in the engine room – in the subconscious and the deeper unconscious. Captain Conscious may be in charge of the ship and giving the orders, but it’s the crew that actually guides the ship, so I needed to find a new map and begin a new path of exploration.
I spent days writing out and repeating affirmations about my ability to heal. I relaxed my mind, body and spirit in meditation and visualised myself pain free.
I was doing well, but the rough seas of the mind are a lot harder to sail than I had expected and I needed help. I sought advice from an expert hypnotherapist and began weekly hypnosis sessions. Over time I travelled into the deep, dark underbelly of my unconscious.
It really surprised me to learn our subconscious mind is always working and does not appear to be limited in any way. Many believe that one of its functions is to attract outcomes and circumstances into our lives according to our predominant thought patterns. Our subconscious mind will act upon any request or instruction we give it.
Any thought that is repeated over and over can leave an imprint within the subconscious. Crucially, the subconscious mind cannot distinguish between what is real and what is imagined. This is why, when you watch a scary movie, for a few seconds while the conscious mind is chilling out in the movie ‘zone’, the subconscious can kick in and truly believe that blood is running down the walls of a house in Amityville. We’ve all been there – we get a momentary fright before our conscious mind takes over to reassure us that it is all just make-believe.
Hypnosis is the perfect vehicle to enter that trance-like state where your conscious mind can rest and allow the subconscious mind to take over and truly believe the new suggestions and beliefs we are implanting.
Visualisations, affirmations, intentions and repeated images, therefore, can have a hugely powerful effect on our lives. By doing these exercises we are creating positive images which the subconscious then acts upon.
For me hypnosis was a great success: I had seen benefits such as weight loss, reduction of my meditation and overall I was achieving my goals easier and quicker. So after months of being the client I decided to study to become the master. With no other motivation than my own healing, I started a course in clinical hypnotherapy with a wonderful teacher, Niamh Flynn at the Galway Clinic. At the end of 2014 I passed my exams and became a certified clinical hypnotherapist.
At this point I really began to dive deep into the ocean of my mind. One of the biggest breakthroughs for me was erasing the word ‘pain’ from my daily dialogue – I replaced it with the word ‘sensations’. This one change had a hugely positive effect on me. Changing the language of pain and removing the word ‘pain’ from my day-to-day life rejuvenated me.
There is mounting evidence to support the idea that the mind has a role in affecting our health and physiology and in the treatment and management of chronic pain.
Research carried out in a 2000 study (by psychologists Steven Lynn, Irving Kirsch, Arreed Barabasz, Etzel Cardeña and David Patterson) revealed that one of the key benefits associated with hypnosis is the ability to alter the psychological components of the experience of pain which may then have an effect on even severe pain.
For me, I wanted to decrease my sensitivity to pain – known as hypnoanalgesia. Over time, the new hypnosis technique and methods that I used daily changed my relationship with my chronic illness.
I truly believe everyone can have success if they can harness the mind–body connection.
I was fuelled by my faith in myself to be well, my positive expectation that I would have success and my desire to keep going. Like any form of training, daily hypnosis requires commitment and I flexed my mental healing muscles every day until I could really see and, most importantly, feel the benefits.
I have now adapted my hypnosis relaxations and use them in all areas of my life: stress reduction, sleeping habits, weight loss, and even getting new jobs and manifesting exciting opportunities. I believe they are the foundation of all the wonderful abundance in my life.
Using my life goals journal and healing relaxations to harness the power of the alpha state of mind go hand in hand for me. I feel they are the seeds of my success and that they can be for you too.
USING THE SELF-HYPNOSIS RELAXATIONS ON MY WEBSITE
Using the self-hypnosis relaxations in the ‘My Life Goals Journal’ section of my website, www.andreahayes.ie, is easy and very effective. It is also free and you can do it as often as you need at a time that suits your schedule and lifestyle.
Hypnotherapeutic approaches have been shown to be very effective in helping people to change their thought processes and, eventually, behaviours; this can assist us in feeling more self-confident and focused on achieving our intentions and goals.
Hypnosis works by first achieving a state of highly focused attention with heightened suggestibility.
The best brainwave state of mind for hypnosis is the alpha state. There are four brainwave states: beta, alpha, theta and delta. Beta is the normal conscious state we are in every day; alpha is a relaxed, drowsy state; theta is the light sleep state or deep meditative state; and delta is the deep sleep or coma state.