Negotiating Success E-Book

Jim Hornickel

• Herausgeber: John Wiley & Sons
• Kategorie: Fachliteratur
• Sprache: Englisch

Seitenzahl: 360

Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2013

Beschreibung

How to execute win-win negotiations every time, in business and in life Negotiating Success provides expert guidance on how to improve strategies and outcomes in negotiating anything in professional and personal life. With a constant focus on the mind, body, and spirit of the professional negotiator, this easy-to- ready text brings a holistic approach to the hard and soft skills needed for ethical negotiations. The result is a better understanding of how to negotiate successfully for mutual benefit by all parties. * Offers tips and tools, such as how to use positive psychology to unite your team, emotional intelligence for successful negotiation, and how to minimize conflict * Spells out the six principles of ethical influence * Written by Jim Hornickel, the founder of Bold New Directions, a transformational learning organization that provides training, coaching, retreats, and keynotes across the world, specializing in negotiation, leadership, communication, presentation, and corporate training Negotiating Success delivers an unparalleled blend of practical and explicit steps to take to achieve win-win negotiations, every time.

Leseprobe

Praise for Negotiating Success

“Jim Hornickel has crafted a book that requires fearless self-examination and a willingness to change how you operate. This book is filled with practical tools for professionals who seek to be more effective in a matrix structure. He doesn't attempt to assert conflict avoidance; rather, he constructs an open and systematic program to reduce the opportunity for misunderstandings and win-lose scenarios.

“Hornickel provides a straightforward approach to developing a comprehensive method to effectively communicate via a personal code of conduct and sharing that code with your collaborators. I'd recommend this for anyone who works in an environment that requires negotiations.”

—Dietrich Thompson, HR Manager, Microsoft Corporation

“Negotiating Success is an inspiring book whose time has come. While hard skills are critical in negotiations, soft skills make up the essential ingredients that support mutually agreeable gains. Jim's blend of the two shows how to make the negotiating process human again. His approach on supporting the other in getting what they want invokes reciprocal behavior. This book shows that conflict is not inevitable for sessions to be successful. The reader will raise his/her emotional intelligence, learn the principles of ethical influence, and still come away with the skills and steps to negotiate intelligently. Hard skills with soft edges; that's the winning formula!”

—Michael Connor

Bridge Partnership, author of Insights of a Father, www.insightsofafather.com

“In addition to being right on target with teaching and polishing negotiating skills, this is a page-turner! Leave it to you, Jim, to create a great teaching manual and an enjoyable read! Nicely done, my friend.”

—Jeff Eisensmith, Department of Homeland Security, Chief Information Security Officer

“This book is exhaustive, concise, simple, and accessible to everyone. You find all you need to know to master negotiation, techniques, processes, and examples.

“The knowledge shared with the reader is useful and applicable in many situations or moments we face in life. I would recommend it not only to a sales person or project manager newly appointed, but also to students and young adults starting in life, parents, and teenagers.

“This approach gives equal importance; first to the people, and second to the techniques engaged in the negotiation process. The whole negotiation is seen as a successful relationship between individuals and not a game you must win.”

—Laurent Belle-Perat, Schneider Electric, Global Marketing, Saudi Arabia; Internal Marketing and Communications Manager, Middle East

“Jim Hornickel is a master at negotiations and relationship building. Throughout this thoughtful book on negotiation skills, Jim brings sensitivity to the negotiating relationship so that all parties feel honored and well-satisfied with the outcomes. Jim has shared his negotiation insights in a way that adds real depth and fulfillment to the myriad of interactions we have each day at work, home, and play.”

—Suzanne Guthrie, editor of Managing From The Inside Out

“Negotiating Success is not just another book on negotiation, but instead presents a unique and brave approach to win-win from a genuine and human perspective rather than a clichéd one. It concisely presents the best in negotiation research and techniques and offers practical advice that will inspire negotiators in any situation to live up to the highest standards of their profession.

“Going beyond commonplace, overly simplistic and counterproductive tactics, it provides an innovative and thoughtful alternative. In an overcrowded category, Negotiating Success differentiates itself by challenging the reader to take a holistic and elevated approach to negotiation with skills, techniques, and personal development that works!”

—Vito Loconte, VP, Global Client Finance, United Kingdom IPG Mediabrands

“Negotiation is something that occurs on a daily basis—from a small conversation regarding a work task completion to a more complex agreement on contractual KPI's. Having a resource that can offer a guide for the interacting process that dissolves conflict and builds rapport is so important. This book serves this purpose in a clear and comprehensive manner, effectively contributing to working relationships that facilitate the necessary pace of today's working world.”

—Sarah Sexton, HR Manager, MWH Global, Doha, Qatar

“The fortunate ones who read Jim's work will have an epiphany. The suggestion that all human interaction involves negotiating is profound. Focus outside of the workplace and realize the broad application his book provides. It can facilitate beneficial dialogue between spouses, children, neighbors, and practically everyone with whom we come in contact.

“Additionally, leading with mutuality and respect will result in more simple negotiations, stronger relationships, and a rewarding career…a must read!”

—Robert Torsey, Management Consultant (Former VP at ALCOA)

“Negotiations are sometimes seen as (hard) games, with a winner and a loser. With this book, Jim brings back the humanity in negotiations. If you want to bring your negotiation skills to the next level or … see negotiations from a whole different perspective, you should read this book! It not only gives you thorough background information, but it also gives you very practical ‘next steps’ that will take you through the process.”

—Gabby Staal, President & Founder of LeaderQuest, Partners in Evolution, The Netherlands

“Jim Hornickel delivers the essential keys to successful negotiations: combining the hard skills with the soft edges that create constructive outcomes for all parties.

“Embrace the tools and principles of Negotiating Success so you're fully prepared in advance of all your meaningful negotiations. Learn to stay true to your values, foresee others' needs, motives and desired results, and move confidently through any discomfort and uncertainty on the path to establishing a win-win.

“It's all here, structured flexibly so you can organize and leverage the tools that best suit your background, situation, and intentions. Enjoy the process—and make the world a better place while you're at it.”

—Ken Jacobsen, President, CourageWorks, Inc.

“Jim Hornickel has drawn from such diverse disciplines as neurology, psychology, and physiology to deliver a transformative book which is conversational and interactive. Scenarios, examples, and templates allow the user to holistically integrate the concepts. Thought provoking questions for self-inquiry go beyond just teaching theory to facilitating inner shifts in awareness. This prepares the reader for skilled negotiation by starting with self-knowledge and moving to understanding human nature. From Hornickel's vast experience in the field he provides clear, solid, proven approaches. Anyone involved in conflict resolution, whether in relationships, business, or diplomatic communication, will benefit from reading this.”

—Susan LynneManagement ConsultantSusan Lynne Development, Toronto

“Every once in a while, a truly insightful and practical guide makes its way to our collective hands and hearts—this is the case with Hornickel's latest book, Negotiating Success. At a time when so many work cultures are embedded in fierce competition and an emphasis on individual success, this publication provides a thoughtful, respectful, and alternative approach to negotiating ‘what you want.’ A highly respected and successful leader, Hornickel convincingly espouses a win-win perspective as key to achieving mutually successful and satisfying negotiations. This is a book that I will refer to time and time again.”

—Jan Janssen, Manager, Upper Tier Municipal Government, and author of human interest articles about community, self-care, women, values, consciousness, etc., Ontario, Canada

“When emotions are high, intelligence is low. Negotiating Success creates an eye-opening journey about how we can develop interactions with others using our greater consciousness to get what we want when the stakes are high.

“Negotiating Success is a must read for anyone looking to improve their personal and professional power in effective communications at a deeper level.”

—Loretta Peters, Personal Brand and Online Identity Strategist, www.EnterprisingCareers.com

“Negotiating Success is a must read for anyone who has acknowledged the benefits of win-win negotiating, but has struggled executing at the table. In simple, direct, and actionable language, Jim breaks down the challenges we all face in taking on new habits or behaviors.

“Jim shares the how and why behind breaking negotiating habits that don't serve you and learning new ones that lead to a more effective outcome and a better business relationship. Having worked with Jim on many occasions, take my word for it and buy this book. Read this book, and then put the message of this book into action!”

—Dan Demers, President, ReMission Consulting, Inc. www.ReMissionConsulting.com

“CEO's will find Negotiating Success a detailed handbook for developing win-win negotiating skills within their team. The book is useful as an introduction to the subject, but its real value is as a manual to lead a process of continuing to improve the team's negotiating and customer relationships skills. Mr. Hornickel writes in a very conversational tone, mixing advice with real life case studies to develop win-win negotiating skills within your team.”

—Matthew Falls, Partner, Growthers

“Negotiating Success answers the question which every human being asks: How can I get what I want out of life without the unexpected and unwanted repercussions and, at the same time, generate and maintain real happiness for myself and others?

“Jim Hornickel's template is the very thing you need to accomplish that which secretly drives you and every other human being on this planet.

“Don't read this book. Eat and savor it. Take time to digest it. In doing so, you will walk into a new you and a new future. A future that you and everyone else will appreciate and wish to duplicate.”

—Barry Curtis, Barry Curtis and Associates

“Haven't most of us taken the time to build a reference library, whether it has to do with health, cooking, home repairs, investing, and probably a few on relationships? Well, along comes another must-have to add to your collection—Negotiating Success—which after you note the subtitle you understand that it will apply to situations you encounter every day professionally, personally, and otherwise. The bonus is that Negotiating Success is much more than a reference book. It is really a how-to manual which offers in-depth understanding on how agreements are formed, compromises developed, and goals attained, as well as a personal development guide to help us in our daily activities involving human interaction. Jim Hornickel has left no stone unturned. What a valuable book he has delivered.”

—Joe Harding, Assistant Women's Basketball Coach, Flagler College

Contents

Cover

Praise for Negotiating Success

Title Page

Copyright

Introduction

Part I: The People in the Process

Chapter 1: Valuing Mutuality, Proactivity, and R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

Mutuality

Proactivity

R.E.S.P.E.C.T

Mutuality, Proactivity, and R.E.S.P.E.C.T. Summary

Chapter 2: Reviewing Human Fundamentals

False Self and True Self

Centricities

Reviewing Human Fundamentals Summary

Chapter 3: Expanding Emotional Intelligence

Self-Awareness

Self-Management

Social Awareness

Managing Relationships

Expanding Emotional Intelligence Summary

Case Study

Chapter 4: Working with Negotiating Styles

Doer—Task-Oriented

Thinker—Task-Oriented

Talker—People-Oriented

Guardian—People-Oriented

Working with Negotiating Styles Summary

Unfolding Case Study

Chapter 5: Integrating Six Principles of Ethical Influence

The Principle of Reciprocity

The Principle of Liking

The Principle of Social Proof

The Principle of Authority

The Principle of Consistency

Principle of Scarcity

Integrating the Six Principles of Influence Summary

Chapter 6: Dissolving Conflict

Code of Conduct

Conflict Escalation

Conflict De-Escalation

Dissolving Conflict Summary

Chapter 7: Presenting Your Case

Why People Buy

Image, Productivity, and/or Profitability

Numb—Pain—Ready to Act

Reception Challenges

Doer as Presenter

Thinker as Presenter

Talker as Presenter

Guardian as Presenter

Summary of Behavior Styles as Presenters

Setting Direction—4 A's

Summary of Behavioral Styles 4 A's Satisfaction Points

Using Your Voice—The 6 P's

Competence and Confidence

Composed Beginning

Strong Stride

Leader's Stance

Breathe

Eye Connection

Expressive Face

Body Language and Gestures

Presenting Your Case Summary

Part II: The Negotiating Process

Chapter 8: Understanding Negotiation Fundamentals

Negotiation Fundamentals

Assumptions

Information Is Power

Disclosure Establishes Trust

Overly Competitive = Lose-Lose

Trading Value—Concessions

Creative Thinking

Understanding Negotiation Fundamentals Summary

Chapter 9: Creating Range and Alternatives

Wish

Starting Point

Who Names the Number First?

Bottom Line

BATNA—Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement

WATNA—Worst Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement

Creating Range and Alternatives Summary

Chapter 10: Concretizing “Why,”“What,” and “How”

Why, What, and How

Concretizing Why, What, and How Summary

Chapter 11: Preparing for Your Session

Uniting Your Team

Preparing for Your Session Summary

Chapter 12: Discovering All Sides

Discovery Phase

Skills for Use in Discovery

Discovery Phase Summary

Chapter 13: Checking In Before Moving On

Check-In Phase

Checking In Before Moving On Summary

Chapter 14: Trading for Mutual Gain

Trade Phase

Trading for Mutual Gain Summary

Chapter 15: Evaluating for Improvement

Evaluate Phase

Evaluating for Improvement Summary

Chapter 16: Disposing of Tactics

Exposing Tactics

The Use of Tactics

Disposing of Tactics Summary

Chapter 17: Practicing for Life

Appendix

Index

Cover image: Business People © iStockphoto.com/Igor Djurovic, Global Business © iStockphoto.com/caracterdesign

Cover design: Wiley

Copyright © 2014 by Jim Hornickel. All rights reserved.

Published by John Wiley & Sons, Inc., Hoboken, New Jersey.

Published simultaneously in Canada.

No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, scanning, or otherwise, except as permitted under Section 107 or 108 of the 1976 United States Copyright Act, without either the prior written permission of the Publisher, or authorization through payment of the appropriate per-copy fee to the Copyright Clearance Center, 222 Rosewood Drive, Danvers, MA 01923, [phone], fax [phone], or on the web at www.copyright.com. Requests to the Publisher for permission should be addressed to the Permissions Department, John Wiley & Sons, Inc., 111 River Street, Hoboken, NJ 07030, [phone], fax [phone], or online at www.wiley.com/go/permissions.

Limit of Liability/Disclaimer of Warranty: While the publisher and author have used their best efforts in preparing this book, they make no representations or warranties with the respect to the accuracy or completeness of the contents of this book and specifically disclaim any implied warranties of merchantability or fitness for a particular purpose. No warranty may be created or extended by sales representatives or written sales materials. The advice and strategies contained herein may not be suitable for your situation. You should consult with a professional where appropriate. Neither the publisher nor the author shall be liable for damages arising herefrom.

For general information about our other products and services, please contact our Customer Care Department within the United States at [phone], outside the United States at [phone] or fax [phone].

Wiley publishes in a variety of print and electronic formats and by print-on-demand. Some material included with standard print versions of this book may not be included in e-books or in print-on-demand. If this book refers to media such as a CD or DVD that is not included in the version you purchased, you may download this material at http://booksupport.wiley.com. For more information about Wiley products, visit www.wiley.com.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data:

Hornickel, Jim, 1952

-Negotiating success: tips and tools for building rapport and dissolving conflict while still getting what you want/Jim Hornickel.

pages cm

Includes index.

ISBN 978-1-118-68871-7 (hardback); ISBN 978-1-118-83693-4 (ebk); ISBN 978-1-118-83702-3 (ebk)

1. Negotiation in business. 2. Negotiation. 3. Conflict management. 4. Emotional intelligence. I. Title.

HD58.6.H67 2014

158′.5–dc23

2013034340

Introduction

All conversations are negotiations. Whether small personal exchanges or large, complex business contracts, we are negotiating all the time. Two key questions are: “What negotiating skills do you have to work with?” and “Who are you being as you negotiate?”

Negotiation skills have been around since Neanderthals determined who would go out and fight the saber-toothed tiger. What has been added in these recent, more enlightened times is attention to negotiation relationships.

You are now embarking on the exciting next steps in negotiating mastery to become ever more aware of using “mutuality” as the way forward. You are at the launch point for taking bold new directions on how to model, teach, and inspire mutual satisfaction in negotiations.

When negotiations are built on the goal of having both sides win, magic happens. Individual and company values are met, visions are achieved, and the organization's needs are fulfilled in the short term and over time. Even in a world that values competition so strongly, when you go for win-win, you will be at the leading edge of this change.

Negotiating involves “hard skills”—steps, phases, and strategies; but it also requires “soft skills”—building positive and productive relationships. We address both major areas in this work.

These pages are designed for you to come back to as often as you require for review. The material in this book is intended to help you grow your mastery over the next days, weeks, months, and years. Yours will be a journey of discovery, practice, and integration. Each chapter ends with a series of questions to probe. I suggest that you write/type each answer. Then use the S.M.A.R.T. goal-setting formula shown to make your next steps toward mastery concrete.

I am honored to be a part of your dynamic growth and fulfillment!

I

The People in the Process

1

Valuing Mutuality, Proactivity, and R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

The Negotiating Success model is based on three equally important principles: Mutuality, Proactivity, and R.E.S.P.E.C.T. (see Figure 1.1). Together they form the cornerstones of the negotiating process.

Figure 1.1 The Cornerstones of the Negotiating Process

Mutuality

People around the world have been deeply indoctrinated in the concept of win-lose. Although that may produce some excitement for a sports event, or create drama in elections, it is simply self-defeating in negotiations. The best results in the short and long run will be to work on behalf of each party getting as much of what is wanted as possible.