The Free-Time Formula E-Book

Jeff Sanders

• Herausgeber: John Wiley & Sons
• Kategorie: Fachliteratur
• Sprache: Englisch

Seitenzahl: 258

Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2018

Beschreibung

Find the time, clarity, and mental space to achieve your goals The Free-Time Formula helps you slow down time and get the important things done. We're all overworked, stressed, and always being asked to do more, and do it better; the days aren't getting any longer, so something has to give--don't let it be your sanity. This book provides a real-world framework for more effective time management that helps you prioritize, focus, clarify, and go. You'll begin with a time audit to assess your current stress, strategies, and output--and the results may shock you. From there, you'll work step-by-step toward a new daily routine that will help you become the focused, efficient achiever you've been trying to be for so long. It's not about cramming more into your precious 24 hours, it's about figuring out what really matters to you, and getting the most important things done first. Every day. Never miss another big deadline, never flake on an important meeting, never be late to an appointment again. It is possible with great planning, and this book is your personal guide. Focused on action, not filler, this book is an excellent resource for those who want to achieve more, but do less. With a few simple changes, you'll find the time you've been missing and put it to more productive use. * Define and prioritize your personal and professional goals and responsibilities * Cut the distractions and clarify your daily objectives * Adapt your workplace tools and environment to facilitate actual work * Periodically self-assess, course-correct when needed, and plan for the future Rather than rush through another day leaving things un-done and roses un-sniffed, take a beat and a breath, and take back your day with The Free-Time Formula.

Leseprobe

Table of Contents

Cover

Title Page

Foreword

Introduction

THE DARK SIDE OF PRODUCTIVITY

BURSTING AT THE SEAMS

A LIFE ON LESS

STEP I: Find Out What's Really Going On

1 The Freedom to Do Anything

FREE TIME: AN EXCUSE TO KEEP WORKING

FREE TIME: THE ULTIMATE ESCAPE

THE MYTH OF FREE TIME

THE TIME MANAGEMENT CONUNDRUM

A DANGEROUS WORD

FREE TIME AT ITS FINEST

THE FREE‐TIME FORMULA

GRAB YOUR (DIGITAL) HIGHLIGHTER

QUICK REVIEW:

FREEDOM TO DO ANYTHING

CHAPTER 1 ACTION PLAN

2 Asking the Right Questions

STEP I: FIND OUT WHAT'S REALLY GOING ON

QUICK WIN

SELF‐EVALUATION

TIME AUDIT: PHASE I

Q&A

QUICK REVIEW:

ASKING THE RIGHT QUESTIONS

CHAPTER 2 ACTION PLAN

STEP II: Clarify What Matters

3 The Vital Few

PRIORITIES DO NOT EXIST

STEP II: CLARIFY WHAT MATTERS

1. DEFINE YOUR VALUES

2. SET YOUR VISION

3. REVIEW YOUR RESPONSIBILITIES

4. GRAB A GREEN PEN

5. ANALYZE YOUR RESULTS

6. COMMIT TO YOUR VITAL FEW

7. TIME AUDIT: PHASE II

QUICK REVIEW:

THE VITAL FEW

CHAPTER 3 ACTION PLAN

4 Knowing What to Do Next

THE FIVE STAGES OF PROJECT PRIORITIZATION

ORGANIZING AND UPDATING THE STATUS OF YOUR PROJECTS

QUICK REVIEW:

KNOWING WHAT TO DO NEXT

CHAPTER 4 ACTION PLAN

STEP III: Flex Your Muscles

5 Fitness for Busy People

STEP III: FLEX YOUR MUSCLES

MOST PRODUCTIVE DAILY HEALTHY HABITS

QUICK REVIEW:

FITNESS FOR BUSY PEOPLE

CHAPTER 5 ACTION PLAN

6 Mental Bicep Curls

PAUSING ON PURPOSE

MENTAL BICEP CURLS

FINDING A MOMENT TO PAUSE

QUICK REVIEW:

MENTAL BICEP CURLS

CHAPTER 6 ACTION PLAN

STEP IV: Cut the Nonsense

7 You Have Permission to Let Go

STEP IV: CUT THE NONSENSE

CREATE YOUR MUST‐DO LIST

QUICK REVIEW:

LET IT GO

CHAPTER 7 ACTION PLAN

8 Reducing Friction

PROCRASTINATING INTELLIGENTLY

ERADICATING BAD HABITS

PASSING THE BATON

A WORD OF CAUTION FOR CONTROL FREAKS

QUICK REVIEW: REDUCING FRICTION

CHAPTER 8 ACTION PLAN

STEP V: Schedule What Matters

9 Red‐Carpet Calendar

STEP V: SCHEDULE WHAT MATTERS

CALENDAR INTERVENTION

CREATE YOUR RED‐CARPET CALENDAR

BATCHING AND THEME DAYS

TEN COMMON OBSTACLES TO CALENDARING

QUICK REVIEW:

RED‐CARPET CALENDAR

CHAPTER 9 ACTION PLAN

10 What to Do with All That Free Time

THREE PLANNING MODELS OF FREE TIME

1. MINDLESS

2. MINDFUL

3. STRUCTURED SPONTANEITY

BEST USE OF YOUR FREE TIME

QUICK REVIEW:

WHAT TO DO WITH ALL THAT FREE TIME

CHAPTER 10 ACTION PLAN

STEP VI: Prevent Future Nonsense

11 Slaying the Distraction Dragons

HOW DISTRACTIONS ACTIVELY WORK AGAINST US

STEP VI: PREVENT FUTURE NONSENSE

DEEP, FOCUSED WORK

SLAYING THE SELF‐IMPOSED DISTRACTION DRAGON

DISTRACTED BY PHYSICAL NEEDS

DISTRACTED BY YOUR ENVIRONMENT

DISTRACTED BY UNFINISHED WORK

DISTRACTED BY TECHNOLOGY

DISTRACTED BY YOUR OWN IDEAS

QUICK REVIEW:

DISTRACTION DRAGON

CHAPTER 11 ACTION PLAN

12 Turn Off the Lights and Hide!

CHAOS TO CLARITY

WHEN TO SAY YES

WHEN (AND HOW) TO SAY NO

SEVENTEEN FOCUS RULES

QUICK REVIEW:

TURN OFF THE LIGHTS AND HIDE!

CHAPTER 12 ACTION PLAN

STEP VII: Solidify Your Ideal Rhythm

13 Crunch and Release

STEP VII: SOLIDIFY YOUR IDEAL RHYTHM

CRUNCH AND RELEASE

WORK HARD, PLAY HARD

RHYTHMIC SABBATICALS

QUICK REVIEW: CRUNCH AND RELEASE

CHAPTER 13 ACTION PLAN

14 Seven‐Day Action Plan

SEVEN‐DAY ACTION PLAN

FINAL MESSAGE

QUICK REVIEW: SEVEN‐DAY ACTION PLAN

#FREETIMEFORMULA

RESOURCES

References

About the Author

Index

End User License Agreement

Guide

Cover

Table of Contents

Begin Reading

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E1

Endorsements

“Busy people rejoice! It doesn't have to be this way. More coffee isn't the solution, less sleep isn't the answer. Let Jeff guide you into a new way to be productive without just running from task to task with manic speed.”

—Jon Acuff, New York Times bestselling author of Finish: Give Yourself the Gift of Done

“When Jeff Sanders puts pen to paper he means it. The Free‐Time Formula is a no nonsense guide to getting your best work done. If you're looking to increase focus and productivity, this is the book for you.”

—Dean Karnazes, Ultramarathoner and New York Times bestselling author of Ultramarathon Man

“If you want to get your most important work done but feel you “don't have time,” then read this! The step‐by‐step action plan will walk you through the journey from busy and chaotic to productive and accomplished.”

—Claire Diaz‐Ortiz, award‐winning author and Silicon Valley innovator

“When so many other productivity gurus teach superficial hacks and ‘effortless’ solutions, Jeff Sanders pushes us to do the real (often hard!) work to create quality free time—by first deciding what truly matters, then cultivating the discipline to do only that. If you're tired of quick fixes that don't fix anything, and ready to go to work identifying and uprooting the real causes of the procrastination, friction, and stress in your life—so that you can spend it doing work that matters—then The Free‐Time Formula is an absolute must‐read.”

—Matt Frazier, author of No Meat Athlete and The No Meat Athlete Cookbook

“Time is money. Yadda yadda. We've heard it before. But realize it's the only thing in our lives we never get back. Jeff gives you concrete things to get more time back in your life to do the things you REALLY want to do.”

—Noah Kagan, founder of Sumo.com and #30 employee at Facebook

“The Free‐Time Formula is a must‐read if you want to get your most important work done, but just can't find the time. The step‐by‐step action plan that Jeff gives you is revolutionary.”

—Hal Elrod, author of The Miracle Morning

“This is not a repackaged restatement of the same things we've all read before about time management. The Free‐Time Formula is a truly practical guide that is full of insights and actionable tips for getting your schedule and your to‐do list under control. More than that, it's a book that will inspire and motivate the reader to take action. I took notes while reading it and have made plans to implement some of Jeff's smart advice in my own life. His “green pen” approach alone is worth the price of the book!”

—Laura McClellan, lawyer, writer, and host of The Productive Woman podcast

“We're all ‘busy,’ but with the right focus you'll find productivity, and through productivity you'll find happiness. In The Free‐Time Formula, Jeff provides the step‐by‐step guidance you need to IGNITE your business and life.”

—John Lee Dumas, host of the Entrepreneurs on Fire podcast

“Ready to get more done and feel great while doing it? Grab The Free‐Time Formula. Jeff Sanders goes above and beyond with a step‐by‐step process for finding more time, efficiency, and serenity every single day.”

—Pamela Wilson, founder BIG Brand System and author of Master Content Marketing

“Who better to walk us through the keys to finding more happiness, focus, and productivity than Jeff Sanders? Jeff's step‐by‐step framework will help anyone struggling with the busyness of life find peace while knocking their goals out of the park.”

—Jeff Brown, award‐winning broadcaster and host of the Read to Lead Podcast

“This is the book every busy leader needs. Full of practical advice and actionable strategies, The Free‐Time Formula is your antidote to the poison of busyness.”

—Dr. Brian Dixon, founder of Amplify Publishers

“In The Free‐Time Formula Jeff functions as a self‐aware sherpa leading us out of overwhelm and into a new place of intentionality. Discover how peace and productivity can co‐exist as your new norm.”

—Kary Oberbrunner, author of Elixir Project and Day Job to Dream Job

“Jeff is an efficiency machine. He not only studies efficiency and productivity but he lives it out. This book gives you a step‐by‐step action plan on how to get more done with your time.”

—Grant Baldwin, keynote speaker and founder of The Speaker Lab

“This book is not about time management—it is about life management. You will learn how to plan the life you want so you don't live a life you don't want.”

—Lee Cockerell, executive vice president, Walt Disney World (retired) and author of Time Management Magic

“The best‐selling author of The 5 AM Miracle has miraculously managed to do it again. In The Free‐Time Formula, Jeff Sanders not only addresses our greatest fears surrounding success, but provides a compelling blueprint for the only kind of success that really matters: the meaningful kind. This book is a must‐read for anyone who realizes that the only ladder of success that matters is the one leaning against the right tree!”

—August Turak, author of Business Secrets of the Trappist Monks

“Jeff Sanders's The Free‐Time Formula humanizes personal productivity and shows that it's possible for everybody, even YOU, to get more from the time you have.”

—David Hooper, host of BIG Podcast

“Imagine being able to fully apply your attention and energy where and when you need it most. Jeff Sanders walks you through why free time is the hidden secret of achieving this. Stop distractions, start eliminating nonsense from your life, and make the most of your time and energy.”

—Erik Fisher, host of the Beyond the To‐Do List podcast

“Finally, someone said it—we can be super productive, busy, and wonderfully ambitious and still create time to enjoy our hard work!”

—Andy Ramage, co‐founder of OneYearNoBeer and author of The 28‐Day Alcohol‐Free Challenge

“Jeff has already helped me rethink what I should do at 5 a.m. each day. In The Free‐Time Formula, Jeff helps us develop the plan and gives us permission to reimagine how we spend our most limited resource—our time.”

—Dave Delaney, founder of Futureforth and author of New Business Networking

“Jeff uses great storytelling to help us slow down so we can speed up and get more out of our day. This is a great read for anyone who wants to escape the trap of busyness and achieve a better tomorrow.”

—Scott Friesen, Busyness Killer and founder of Simpletivity

THE FREE‐TIME FORMULA

Finding Happiness, Focus, and Productivity No Matter How Busy You Are

JEFF SANDERS

Copyright © 2018 by John Wiley & Sons, Inc. All rights reserved.

Published by John Wiley & Sons, Inc., Hoboken, New Jersey.

Published simultaneously in Canada.

No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, scanning, or otherwise, except as permitted under Section 107 or 108 of the 1976 United States Copyright Act, without either the prior written permission of the Publisher, or authorization through payment of the appropriate per‐copy fee to the Copyright Clearance Center, Inc., 222 Rosewood Drive, Danvers, MA 01923, (978) 750‐8400, fax (978) 646‐8600, or on the Web at www.copyright.com. Requests to the Publisher for permission should be addressed to the Permissions Department, John Wiley & Sons, Inc., 111 River Street, Hoboken, NJ 07030, (201) 748‐6011, fax (201) 748‐6008, or online at http://www.wiley.com/go/permissions.

Limit of Liability/Disclaimer of Warranty: While the publisher and author have used their best efforts in preparing this book, they make no representations or warranties with respect to the accuracy or completeness of the contents of this book and specifically disclaim any implied warranties of merchantability or fitness for a particular purpose. No warranty may be created or extended by sales representatives or written sales materials. The advice and strategies contained herein may not be suitable for your situation. You should consult with a professional where appropriate. Neither the publisher nor author shall be liable for any loss of profit or any other commercial damages, including but not limited to special, incidental, consequential, or other damages.

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Library of Congress Cataloging‐in‐Publication Data

Names: Sanders, Jeff, 1984‐ author.

Title: The free‐time formula : finding happiness, focus, and productivity no matter how busy you are / Jeff Sanders.

Description: Hoboken, New Jersey : John Wiley & Sons, Inc., [2018] | Includes index. |

Identifiers: LCCN 2017056125 (print) | LCCN 2017057057 (ebook) | ISBN 9781119432982 (epub) | ISBN 9781119432975 (pdf) | ISBN 9781119432968 (pbk.)

Subjects: LCSH: Time management.

Classification: LCC BF637.T5 (ebook) | LCC BF637.T5 S345 2018 (print) | DDC 650.1/1—dc23

LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2017056125

Cover Design: Wiley

Cover Image: Background: © mammuth/iStockphoto; Beaker: © sorn11/iStockphoto

For my wife, Tessa, the reason I am able to find my own happiness, focus, and productivity.

Foreword

Imagine if you could get an extra hour of free time, every single day—to read, to work out, or to spend with your family.

What if you could double your productivity while eliminating those feelings of being overworked and overwhelmed?

Seems impossible? That's what I thought too until I experienced it myself.

A long time ago I believed success was all about the hustle. Working five days a week wasn't enough so I worked seven. Eight hours a day wasn't enough so I worked sixteen or more, often sleeping just a few hours under my desk. I was “crazy busy” and wore my insane schedule like a badge of honor. “I'll sleep when I'm dead,” I'd say with bravado.

And that almost happened. One early morning I stopped to fill up my car with gas and when I drove away, klunk! I had forgotten to take the nozzle out of my car. I was lucky I didn't blow the place up. A week later I was pulled over by a state trooper. He told me he was driving the speed limit in the slow lane when I pulled up behind him and rode his bumper, then I swerved around him and sped off ultimately doing ninety miles per hour. And I never saw him until his siren went off and his lights flashed in my rearview mirror. I was so tired, stressed, and not present that I was like a drunk who just didn't understand how many drinks I had.

That breaking point led me to a long study of productivity, time management, and mindfulness. I've interviewed hundreds of ultra‐productive people including self‐made millionaires and billionaires, Olympic athletes, and even straight‐A college students. What were their secrets to extreme productivity?

With my last company, I went from working a hundred hours a week for my little $1‐million‐a‐year business to thirty‐two hours a week in a $12‐million‐a‐year business. Twelve times the results with one‐third the work. When I sold that business, to celebrate, I bought a painting by renowned New York City artist Peter Tunney. It's called The Time Is Always Now.

Today, I'm devoting my life to helping others achieve their full potential. My company, LEADx, offers free online training programs to everyone around the world. We reach people in 192 different countries and universally our most popular courses are on overcoming procrastination, choosing priorities, increasing focus, and maximizing energy. The desire for more time is universal, because time is life.

That's what makes Jeff Sanders's The Free‐Time Formula literally life‐changing. He shares not just research from other leading productivity experts, but also, with total vulnerability, the mistakes he's made and lessons he's learned on his own journey to greater focus and happiness.

And be prepared to be pushed out of your comfort zone. Like a magic mirror, this book will reveal where you truly are in your own life, it will reveal your distraction habits, and other ways you self‐sabotage your success. I definitely squirmed in discomfort as I answered Jeff's questions and completed the self‐assessment and realized how much further I have to go. But I know you can't have an extraordinary life by doing what you've always done.

How would an extra hour or two a day change your life? How could that time make a positive impact on your health, happiness, and family? There are 1,440 minutes in a day. As each minute passes, you never get it back. Remember, the time is always now.

Kevin KruseNew York Times best‐selling author of 15 Secrets Successful People Know AboutTime Management and CEO of LEADx

Introduction

THE DARK SIDE OF PRODUCTIVITY

Six weeks after signing the papers to write this book about free time, happiness, and productivity, I found myself (for the first time), as a patient in the emergency room.

The doctor concluded I had suffered an esophageal spasm, a condition that closely resembles a heart attack and is presumed to be caused in part by stress and anxiety (Whelan, 2017).

How did I get here? How did a guy in his thirties, a productivity coach and marathon runner, find himself so overworked that his own body revolted against him? How did a beautifully manicured calendar with ambitious goals turn into an uncontrollable monster with such an extreme consequence?

Most importantly, how can you craft your own productive, fulfilling, and successful life, while ensuring a situation like this one does not happen to you?

This book is about so much more than free time. It is about so much more than an extra hour of Netflix, or another night out on the town. This book is about designing your ideal world and experiencing the extraordinary benefits that come with it.

BURSTING AT THE SEAMS

Let's back this story up just a bit. There is a lot to unfold here.

One year before my surprising medical fiasco I was in a good place. I was working hard, accomplishing goals left and right, and riding a wave of hope, optimism, and some seriously great outcomes.

Right in the middle of this productive season I got sick and took a few days off to recover. I was beaten up, exhausted, and long overdue for a break.

Though my physician told me I had caught a seasonal bug, I knew the truth: I had caused this illness. I had pushed too hard, asked for too much, and believed I was invincible (which is pretty typical Jeff Sanders behavior). Knowing that I tend to lean on my natural ambition (and quite a few shots of espresso), it was clear I needed a new plan to ease into my goals. I needed a new rhythm, more flex time, and a balanced approach to my entire calendar.

I tried a new approach and, surprisingly to me, it worked wonders. For a full year, I was crushing my goals while not getting crushed myself. For twelve whole months, I managed to get more done than I expected and avoid any serious lapses in productivity.

But … (you may have seen this coming) … it did not last. I got greedy. I became overly ambitious (again) and began to uncontrollably take on more than I could reasonably handle. My projects were growing bigger in scale, I was saying yes to more opportunities than I had time for, and, most importantly, I was squeezing every last ounce of margin out of my life.

Free time? Nah! I had work time.

Breaks? Nope. I was on fire, remember?

Then, one by one, the precursors to the ER began to appear. Because I had booked my schedule to the brim, there was no free space for anything else, including the inevitable problems that always show up in the process of doing anything significant.

Let's get specific.

In eight short weeks I booked and delivered back‐to‐back‐to‐back speaking engagements; recorded and edited the audiobook for The 5 AM Miracle (my first book); negotiated the contract for the book you are reading now; launched a premium productivity membership program; scaled up my exercise routine to six days a week; continued recording, editing, and publishing weekly episodes of my podcast—and I continued to manage any and all personal responsibilities I have with my wife, Tessa; our home; our pug, Benny; our finances; and on, and on.

You can likely see where this is headed. There was no wiggle room, no flexibility, no free time. Though I could not see it myself, I was teetering on a total breakdown, and it was only a matter of time before I would come crashing down.

Without warning, and in the final seven days of this eight‐week calamity, my life went from busy and productive to chaotic and unmanageable. On top of all of the many projects I was working so hard on, three formidable and unforeseen problems fell right into my lap.

I found myself arguing over a contentious contract dispute with an important client, fighting a collections issue over a hospital billing error, and receiving challenging family medical news that only added additional debt, stress, and frustrating uncertainty.

This was a formula for disaster—a shining example of building a frail house of cards and then helplessly watching as the foundation gives way.

Each challenge was daunting on its own. As they began to stack up, one after the other, it was becoming clear that I was losing the tight grip I valued so much over the projects and opportunities I had personally accepted, and relinquishing any ability I had to respond to setbacks I never saw coming.

I was beginning to feel the substantial weight and crushing magnitude of my current commitments and brand‐new obligations. Without a minute of flex time on my calendar, and my stress already rising to an all‐time high, I was out of options to realistically complete the tasks at hand.

A few days later my wife called 911 when I found myself with heart attack–like symptoms: rapid heart rate, shortness of breath, rising blood pressure, nausea, and extreme tightness in my chest—essentially, a full‐on panic attack that felt as though death was knocking at my front door. Thirty minutes later I was riding in an ambulance to the nearest Nashville emergency room, and confronting my poor decision making that allowed this mess to occur.

A perfect storm arose, and I was crushed beneath it.

A LIFE ON LESS

Fast‐forward a few months and my life, business, and daily calendar had all transformed in dramatic ways.

No longer was I planning epic goals on top of one another, or booking fourteen‐hour workdays on purpose. Instead, I found myself with an extraordinary situation that still makes me smile today. I had free time—real time to process my life and goals—time to address the unpredictable challenges that inevitably pop up—AND focused time to make significant progress on my most important work.

The irony is not lost on me—I needed “free time” to write The Free‐Time Formula, and I made it happen.

There are many lessons to be learned from our most challenging seasons in life: consequences we should avoid, problems we should prevent, distracting people we should block on Facebook …

And I believe there is also so much to be gained from reviewing our victories, digging deep into the seasons of life when everything flows smoothly, analyzing our brightest moments, and figuring out how we can repeat those successes over and over again.

When I think back to that tough season of my life that resulted in an unexpected ER visit, I am forced to confront difficult but powerful questions—and you too can ask yourself these same questions about your current challenges and vision for the future:

Do you have all of the precious time you need right now to fully process the busyness of modern daily life?

Are your current goals serving you, or are they serving someone else's agenda, external validation, arbitrary checkboxes, or blind ambition?

Are you in the habit of self‐sabotage, undermining your progress just when things start to go well?

Do you consistently respond to unexpected yet inevitable challenges with clear focus, wisdom, and patience?

If your current reality continues as it is going now, will you become the person you always hoped to become?

Do you have guaranteed blocks of time on your calendar for what matters most today, and every day going forward?

What transformative actions can you take now to clear the nonsense from your calendar and be at your best every day?

The answers to questions just like these are what this book is all about. There is a lot we can do to build ourselves up to handle more every day, but there is infinitely more we can do to design a life that operates beautifully on less.

The process to find more happiness, focus, and productivity lies in The Free‐Time Formula. Carving out free time for our most valuable ambitions (and our sanity) in the midst of a busy life is more of an art than a science, but the productive building blocks are here, and I am excited to share them with you!

STEP IFind Out What's Really Going On

1The Freedom to Do Anything: We All Want More Free Time, Right?

All of your time is free time—every minute.

That can be a hard pill to swallow, especially when we are bombarded with responsibilities, obligations, and important tasks to accomplish every week of every year. However, as you will soon see, you have an incredible opportunity with the time you already have, with the work you are already doing, and with the calendar you know is already overbooked (again).

Working on goals that matter to us is what we are here to do, and no matter how you define it, your time is your time. How you choose to spend it is influenced by more factors than we have time to unpack in this book, but let's start with the biggest chunk for most people: work.

FREE TIME: AN EXCUSE TO KEEP WORKING

I know this is the Type A in me speaking loudly, but work is not the enemy—it is one of our greatest means to fulfillment and goal achievement. Work is a love affair with our inner creative and a real opportunity to leave the world better than we found it.

My wife, Tessa, and I are self‐identified workaholics, and we both work from home. We naturally fill our free time with more work because we genuinely love what we do.

Every Friday night is date night for the two of us—a chance to stop working, get out of the house, and eat dinner together somewhere in Nashville. I would love to say that we have tried all of the best restaurants, but we are way too predictable (and cheap) for that. If not tacos at Las Palmas, then tacos at Taco Mamacita. If not Mamacita's, then back to Las Palmas. Tacos win almost every week.

Date night used to be scheduled at 5:00 pm, then 5:30, then 6:00. A few weeks ago, we skipped it because both of us would rather finish our projects than leave anything undone. Though Tessa and I intentionally schedule free time on our calendar to be filled with a night out, we ultimately choose in the moment how we want that time to be spent.

Free time becomes a placeholder on our calendar for priority management fighting against impulsivity. In other words, in the open spaces on our calendar we could tackle our responsibilities and goals, or spontaneously do whatever we want. Knowing the two of us, “whatever we want” often means choosing to extend our workday a little longer.