Back Home E-Book

Jochen Schuppener

• Herausgeber: Books on Demand
• Kategorie: Ratgeber
• Sprache: Englisch

Seitenzahl: 86

Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2016

Beschreibung

YOU HAVE LIVED ABROAD. NOW YOU RETURN “HOME”. Having arrived there, you realize much has changed. You too have changed while living overseas. This book offers you assistance in a time of goodbyes and for the reintegration after having come back “home”.

Leseprobe

INHALT

Leaving

THE RIGHT TIMING

Does Time Abroad Even Make Sense?

The Right Time for Moving

Relationship and Children When Leaving

Celebrating the Farewell

What is Normal in the Process of Saying, „Goodbye“?

Is There a Wrong Way to Say, „Goodbye“?

The Move

KING OF CHAOS?

Loss of Status

Chaos and Disruption

The Move—King of Chaos?

Worries About the Future

Arrival

HOME, SWEET HOME

Ten Tips for Surviving After the Return

Cultural Stress During the Return

Dealing with Loss and Grief

Reunions with Colleagues, Friends and Family

Advice for Superiors, Colleagues, Relatives and Friends

Challenges for Children and Teenagers

Reintegration

FINDING YO UR PLACE

Back Home: The Importance of Reflection

What Did I Bring Along?

How Long Does Reintegration Take?

Phases of Reintegration

What About the Children?

Truly Reintegrated

About the Authors

INTRODUCTION

For many years we have assisted people in their return process to their homeland. Time and time again we realized how important a well-planned process is for a successful reintegration experience.

It all started with our own return after having spent eight years abroad. From observing other former expats we knew that reintegration does not simply happen. We observed that some had real challenges coming back to their homeland. On the other hand, we had received much support from friends towards the end of our stay. They asked us questions to reflect upon our time abroad. A good farewell with small, but significant rituals was very helpful for our entire family. We also realized that our children’s “home” was actually in the host nation, abroad. Germany was the country where Grandma and Grandpa lived. The people there were quite different.

Also, we had changed. We were not aware of those changes, which usually became apparent with misunderstandings and unexpected conflicts. Our experiences developed our desire to support others in similar situations. Since that time, we have been able to support expats from all over the world in this important stage so they, too, could experience successful reintegration to their homelands.

An intense period of life abroad lies behind you. You experienced many milestones—some positive, and some challenging. And now you are heading back. Through our consultations and seminars as intercultural counselors, we try to emphasize how the valuable experiences from the previous years as an expat can be included in the very important process of returning to the homeland. It is our desire to encourage you and to give you practical advice as you embark on this journey.

We want to thank those whom we have been able to support over the past years. It has been a privilege to be part of this important process with each of you. Many ideas for this book came as responses to our clients’ needs.

When returning home after many intense years abroad, many people think, “No problem, I know what’s up. This will be quite easy, unlike my departure when I did not have a clue.”

However, the reintegration of expats poses a problem to many companies and organizations.

While most companies offer in-service and training for preparing for the stay abroad, it is hard to find reintegration programs. Only 14% of surveyed companies have a formal repatriation strategy.

The return to the home country is often characterized by a feeling of being somehow in the wrong place, of not fitting in, and of being like a stranger. Usually questions start coming up shortly after the initial joy of returning “home,“ such as:

How do I find my place at work and in society?

What do I need now? What do my spouse and our children need?

Does anyone understand me?

A good reintegration starts before the actual physical return. Those who start thinking about this process early enough create the best foundation for a successful return and reintegration.

Above all, the experiences gained abroad can enrich one’s life, giving new perspectives and energy. But that does not happen automatically.

This book will give you a new perspective about the dynamics of return home. You will find many handy hints and practical ideas for a successful reintegration.

80% of those who go abroad travel with their spouse, and more than 60% travel with their family; therefore, we also will give ideas to support your relationships, both with your spouse and your children.

We hope you enjoy reading, pondering, and applying this book to your unique situation.

We are grateful for feedback on this important subject. Please feel free to share your experiences and questions to [email protected]

Jochen and Christine Schuppener

Leaving

THE RIGHT TIMING

Does Time Abroad Even Make Sense?

The Right Time for Moving

Relationship and Children When Leaving

Celebrating the Farewell

What is Normal in the Process of Saying, „Goodbye“?

Is There a Wrong Way to Say, „Goodbye“?

Feeling at home in a foreign country! That sounds really good. After some initial uncertainties about cultural “do’s and don`ts,” you navigated your way through. You recognized that some rules from your country of origin, do not apply here. Of course you still drop a brick ones in while, but that is part of being here. You came to appreciate the new culture, you know where to get what you need, and you became accustomed to the language. Everything feels normal—somewhat like home. Does that sound familiar to you?

Or did you find it more difficult? You never really understood the people here, and you usually felt like an outsider. You are glad that it is over now.

Or was it more like this? The locals were not the problem, but rather you had trouble with your international colleagues. To which culture should you adapt? You preferred the company of your native-language community.

It could also be that you did not want to return „home“ at all. It was your organization or company, the government authorities, or the age of your children that forced you to come back.

DOES TIME ABROAD EVEN MAKE SENSE?

Experiences abroad are valuable. Studies show that time spent abroad has positive effects on everyone involved—for you, your spouse, and your children (who accompany 60% of those who go abroad). This is why we often address families in this book.

The advantages of gaining experience abroad include:

Positive personal development

Increased mobility

Ability to adapt to new environments and people

Global vision and perspectives

Ability to build meaningful relationships in a short amount of time

International network

Language skills

Intercultural knowledge

Intercultural sensitivity

Ability to perform well in a cross-cultural setting

And now you are supposed to return “home.” You have mixed thoughts, feelings, hopes, and maybe even worries and fears.

HOW INTEGRATED ARE YOU?

At first you experienced some fundamental changes in your life habits. You had to learn how to finish the daily vocational routine. Finding a good rhythm was not easy. Figuring out where and how to bring in your skills was another challenge. Would you make friends? How would you get along with your new colleagues while dealing with the language barrier? In addition to new co-workers, you may have been working with an international team. Now, after the fact, you can say that, along with various challenges, you have enjoyed many positive experiences.

For example:

You have been accepted by your local colleagues, and overall you are comfortable with your work.

You are happy with your new “home.”

You have settled in the team.

You are able function in your new environment, even though it still may present challenges.

Your children are well-integrated in their schools.

You get along well with your local household helper (if you have one).

You enjoy a great variety of social contacts and invitations from both other expats and locals.

You grow your own palm tree in your back yard.

But maybe you find your foreign assignment very difficult. You feel as if you have never really arrived. Misunderstandings and conflicts cost you a lot of energy. Often, you simply felt overwhelmed. Now you are happy that the experience finally is over.

Spending a part of your life in a different culture is a privilege. Living and working in another culture has the potential to enrich your life. It can help you to become a person who is more flexible, open, and appreciative of differences when you return home.

THE RIGHT TIME FOR MOVING

What needs to be considered when returning to the home country? What can support you specifically during this phase? You already know that moving can be a time of chaos—suitcases, boxes, arguments, children out of control. . .

That is one thing, but beyond that our emotions are also in turmoil.

People describe having mixed feelings, a roller coaster of emotions. The stress level is slowly, but constantly increasing, and at some point our nerves usually snap.

Is there a right or a wrong time to plan the move? When does moving make sense—and when does it not?

TIPS:

Here are some questions you should ask yourself:

How often have I already moved?Which aspects were most strenuous and stressful for me?What helped me then the most?What helps me relax in the chaos?What time of the year is moving the easiest for me? When is it the most stressful?If you have a spouse, are both of you in agreement on moving?

You should also consider the length of your time abroad. How long are you planning or required to stay abroad? Do you have a temporary contract, or do you have greater flexibility?

The longer you stayed abroad, the more challenges can arise when returning. Procedures and technology change. That also applies to a return into your previous work environment. Company hierarchy may change; your former peer might now be your superior. The company staff may have changed, and a new boss might have a completely different leadership style.

Dynamics in your social circles and organizations will have changed. Family structures will no longer be the same. Friends will have married, and other relationships will have ended. New children have been born. Acquaintances will have moved. Even at your fitness center you may have new staff and a new trainer.