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Improve your productivity, take a more enjoyable approach to life and amplify your leadership
Using a human centered approach, Busy Is a Four Letter Word looks at the essential relationship between living well and leading well, aiming to end the self-gratifying martyrdom of “busy” culture, and working to uncomplicate personal and professional prosperity.
By highlighting topics such as real self-care, rest, wellness, and saying “no” as indispensable to success and productivity, the powerful 5 step ReThink Method in Busy Is a Four Letter Word helps readers get more out of life while also being more productive in their pursuits. In this book, you'll learn:
With Busy Is a Four Letter Word and Palmer's highly effective ReThink Method at your fingertips, leaders and team members alike can find ways to get more done by rethinking their approach to work and life.
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Seitenzahl: 337
Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2024
Cover
Table of Contents
Title Page
Copyright
Foreword
Note
PREFACE: THANK YOU FOR BEING A FRIEND
The Golden Girls
and
A Different World
Make an Appearance!
CHAPTER 1: THE PURSUIT OF HAPPY LESS: BUSY IS A FOUR‐LETTER WORD
The Myth of Multitasking
Strategies for Purposeful Productivity
The PERMA Method in Real Life
Breaking Free: Making Every Minute Matter
Notes
CHAPTER 2: THE SANDS OF TIME ARE LITTERED WITH TO‐DO LISTS
The Hustle of Single Motherhood
The Root of My Micromanaging
The Birth of the reTHINK Method
The Five Core Principles of the reTHINK Method
Unraveling the Myth of Multitasking
Four Steps to Ditching the Madness of Multitasking
Conclusion: Breaking Free from the Busy Trap
Note
CHAPTER 3: FROM ACTIVITY TO ACHIEVEMENT: CUTTING THROUGH THE CLUTTER
The Futility of Micromanaging Life
Are You Achieving or Just Staying Busy?
Streamlining Efforts Toward Meaningful Goals
Thoughtful Planning Before You Move: A Reflective Approach
The Importance of Rest: Knowing When to Pause
Conclusion: From Planning to Purpose
Notes
CHAPTER 4: CHECK UP BEFORE YOU CHARGE UP: HEALTHY ASSESSMENT BEFORE YOU ACT (reTHINK)
Are You Truly Leveraging Your Resources or Just Busy Being Busy?
Self‐Improvement Versus Asset Amplification
Cognitive Tools for Decision‐Making
Real‐World Application: Implementing Healthy Assessment in Your Organization
Conclusion: Advocating for Realistic Evaluation
CHAPTER 5: THE PARADOX OF SELF‐CARE SACRIFICE: WORKING SMARTER, NOT HARDER
Manicures, Pedicures and Spa Days…Oh MY!
Why Working Harder Is Not the Answer
Kishshana's Golden Rules of Delegation
Empowering Your Support Team: Building a Culture of Open Communication
Paralyzed by Purging: The Struggle with Letting Go
Conclusion
CHAPTER 6: THE ART OF THE ELEGANT BRUSH‐OFF (reTHINK): AN INCLUSIVE APPROACH TO SETTING AND REACHING GOALS
The Sophia Petrillo School of Straight Talk
The Blanche Devereaux Guide to Graceful Declination
Rose Nylund's Lessons in Setting Inclusive Goals
Dorothy Zbornak's No‐Nonsense Approach to Accountability
The Cheesecake Strategy: Finding Balance and Joy in What Matters
Putting It All Together: Your Golden Girls Guide to Goal Setting and Saying No
A Personal Note: My Journey from Yes Woman to Goal Getter
Conclusion: Golden Wisdom for a Balanced Life
CHAPTER 7: SNOOZE MORE, SNORE LESS REST IS NOT A REWARD: THE CRITICAL ROLE OF DOWNTIME
The Myth of Constant Productivity
Why Waiting to Rest Is Costing You More Than You Think
Creating My Five‐Star Wellness Plan
Seasons of Life and Shifting Priorities
Innovative Approaches in Leadership
Recognizing the Importance of Rest
Creating Your Own Five‐Star Wellness Plan
Embracing the Journey
Notes
CHAPTER 8: FLEXIBILITY IN THE FACE OF RESISTANCE: NAVIGATING SHIFTS IN CULTURE AND VALUES (reTHINK)
The Golden Rule of Cultural Shifts
From Pet to Threat: The Black Woman's Tightrope
Leading with Flexibility: The Dwayne Wayne Approach
Understanding Resistance: The Sophia Petrillo Guide
Strategies for Overcoming Resistance and Fostering Organizational Resilience
Adaptive Leadership: Lessons from Hillman College
Managing Intergenerational Teams: Navigating Busyness and Work Perspectives
Emotional Intelligence: The Glue That Holds It All Together
Embracing Diversity: More Than Just a Hillman Motto
The Power of Authenticity: Keeping It Real in a Fake World
The Cheesecake Solution: Finding Common Ground
Conclusion: Embracing the Journey
Notes
CHAPTER 9: REVOLUTIONIZING REST: THE UNSEEN POWERHOUSE OF PRODUCTIVITY: KNOW WHEN TO REST BEFORE YOU ACT (reTHINK)
The Impact of Rest on Organizational Health
Leading by Example: The Blueprint for Change
Cultivating a Restful Culture
The Effects of C‐PTSD on Work Patterns
Conclusion: Embracing the Power of Rest
Notes
CHAPTER 10: FROM BUSY BEE TO QUEEN BEE: MASTERING WORK‐LIFE SYNERGY
Growing Up a Latch‐Key Kid in Queens
The Impact on Work‐Life Balance
Embracing the Power of the Strategic No
From Disciplinarian to Advisor: The Evolution of Leadership
Cultivating Supportive Work Environments: The Cheesecake Approach
Measuring Success Holistically: Beyond the Bottom Line
Mastering Work‐Life Synergy:
The Golden Girls
Guide
Conclusion: From Busy Bee to Queen Bee
CHAPTER 11: CULTIVATING YOUR CIRCLE: THE STRENGTH IN SUPPORTIVE NETWORKS
Unleashing the Power of Networks: A Strategic Blueprint for Thriving
Cultivate Your Circle
The Broader Context: Embracing a Life Beyond Busyness
CHAPTER 12: DIGITAL DISCIPLINE: HARNESSING TECHNOLOGY FOR TRUE PRODUCTIVITY
Unleashing Your Productivity: Mastering Technology, Not Being Mastered by It
Setting Boundaries with Technology
A Mindful Approach to Setting Boundaries
Run Your Tech, Don't Let Your Tech Run You
Note
EPILOGUE: EMBRACING SIMPLICITY: THE PATH TO ENLIGHTENED LEADERSHIP AND A FULFILLING LIFE
The Power of Simplicity in Leadership and Life
Recapping Key Strategies for Simplification
The reTHINK Method: A Blueprint for Simplification
The Historical Context of Simplicity
Simplicity in the Digital Age
The Role of Simplicity in Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion
Overcoming Barriers to Simplicity
The Ripple Effect of Simplicity
Simplicity and Sustainability
The Journey Ahead: Implementing Simplicity in Your Life and Leadership
The Reality of Busyness
Finding Your Tribe
Embracing the Power of Rest
Redefining Productivity
Cultivating Joy
The Ripple Effect of Change
Embracing Flexibility
Creating a Wellness Plan
The Journey Ahead
A Call to Action
Appendix: The Process Model for Prioritization and Focus (PMPF)
Identify Your Core Goals
Evaluate Your Activities
Strategically Eliminate Tasks
Reallocate and Focus Your Effort
Conclusion
Acknowledgments
Index
End User License Agreement
Cover
Table of Contents
Title Page
Copyright
Foreword
Preface
Begin Reading
Epilogue: Embracing Simplicity: The Path to Enlightened Leadership and a Fulfilling Life
Appendix: The Process Model for Prioritization and Focus (PMPF)
Acknowledgments
Index
End User License Agreement
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In Kishshana Palmer's captivating book Busy Is A Four‐Letter Word, I found myself immersed in a world of tangible tools and invaluable insights that have transformed the way I will approach my leadership as a Black woman CEO from now on. Kishshana's writing is not only relatable and witty, but also backed by thorough research, making it an indispensable resource for anyone looking to navigate the challenges of a demanding career while maintaining their sanity.
What sets this book apart is Kishshana's unique approach of relating leadership tips to scenes from two iconic sitcoms from the 80s – A Different World and The Golden Girls. By drawing parallels between these beloved shows and real‐life leadership scenarios, Kishshana injects a sense of familiarity and humor into her advice, making it all the more accessible and relevant.
But what truly sets Busy Is A Four‐Letter Word apart is Kishshana's genius and humanity that shine through every page. It feels as though she is lovingly coaching and pushing leaders to be their best whole‐hearted selves, making the journey to success not only manageable but also deeply fulfilling.
Reading this book felt like receiving the best hug I never knew I needed – comforting, reassuring, and empowering all at once. I cannot recommend it highly enough to every leader and leader‐in‐training out there. Kishshana Palmer's Busy Is A Four‐Letter Word is a must‐read that will undoubtedly leave a lasting impact on your leadership journey.
—Dr. Angela GlymphCEO of Peer Health Exchange
The first time I saw Kishshana speaking on a stage I was instantaneously impressed by her style, specifically her stiletto shoes. It didn't take much longer for me to be inspired by her wisdom and wit. A burned‐out vice president at a national nonprofit at the time, I credit Kishshana with saving me from prematurely ending my career. Her coaching and example as an entrepreneur and mom have helped me navigate my own life redesign and career pivot. Busy Is A Four‐Letter Word will help you recognize the systems, practices, and beliefs that keep you running ragged and provides practical guidance to live a more balanced life on purpose and your own terms. It's a ticket to freedom!
—Maria DautrucheFounder, dopwell group LLC
KISHSHANA PALMER
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Dr. Robert S. Harvey
To be busy, or not to be busy: that is the question.
For decades, our lives have become progressively faster. What was at one time a necessary symptom reserved for outlier professionals—physicians, politicians, and preachers [because alliteration is queen]—has now rotted the whole. Rot, though a strong word choice you might argue, is apropos because missing time with family, juggling back‐to‐back calendar items, forgetting to eat, operating off caffeine, and sleeping less than elephant seals is for so many, a brag. Imagine that: bragging about the dethreading of one's relationships, the destruction of one's body, and in so many ways, the dissipation of one's soul.
Again, strong word choices, I know.
My maternal grandmother, Alma [‘Granny’], was a Black woman born during the Progressive Era where social activism and political reform swept the nation. She lived the first two decades of her life in Shannon, Mississippi, named after Samuel Shannon, who purchased land at that location from Chickasaw Chief Itawamba in the early 1800s. For a century, it was known for a creek, a church, corn, and cotton gin. To this very day, the town website prides itself on being “the quiet side of the country.” Our family maintains acres of land in that town where my visits affirm that flowing creeks and a slowed‐paced for doing just about everything continue to make Shannon what it is. As she once said, “We didn't have much, but we had it all.”
In the 1940s, granny boarded a northbound train for St. Louis, a crowded, fast, and busy city of more than 800,000 residents trying to make sense of itself, its economy, and its culture during World War II. Within a matter of months, what was at once a slow life, marked by its reputation for simplicity and stillness, became a life consumed by “conspicuous consumption,” a concept coined by economist Thorstein Veblen. Buicks, Cadillacs, furs, costume jewelry, and expanding closets for more clothes than we'd ever wear. More stuff, less time became the new reputational mark of superiority. The answer in this new city, with new opportunities and new industries and new homes and new money was: to be busy. Lest you judge me as a judge of my granny, she was not an anomaly, but the norm. She was part of the turning tide in this nation where compounding capitalism and growing militarism demanded more of life than a creek, a church, corn, and cotton gin. Marked by racism and classism and sexism, she fueled her success as an emerging mother of four as most did: busyness. Did she miss the stillness? Did she long for simplicity? Did she ever want the sounds of the creek passing through the town? I will never know. But what I do know is that America has always had a way of marking our relationships, our bodies, and our souls with a branding that transcends our choice—and the brand we've been forced to endure since the 40s is: to be busy.
A couple of years ago, I started color‐coding my calendar as a way of signaling to my brain the distinction between internal meetings, external meetings, travel, focused work blocks (affectionately titled, ‘do not schedule’), and deliverables. In effect, I started color‐coding my busyness. Because, if I must be busy, it should at least have coordinated color‐codes and stylistic labeling. Right? This year, I discovered that one of the underlying causes of the busyness‐for‐busyness‐sake‐syndrome (‘BS’) is at worst: rationalism. Think for a moment on the people who've seemed to take “busy” and tossed it out the window. You know…your drunk uncle at the holiday barbecue, or the loquacious neighbor who's retired and sits on the front porch watching people because what else do they have to do? It was in fact, Gottfried Leibniz, the German philosopher who contented: “The senses, although they are necessary for all our actual knowledge, are not sufficient to give us the whole of it, since the senses never give anything but instances…”1 Imagine ignoring that senseof what you feel deep within your body and your soul. Imagine disregarding the fullness of the sense you are experiencing within your relationships that something must give. That sense of a new way and a new normal needing to emerge, only for you to rationalize yourself to busyness.
At its worst—our calendar coding and half‐day work blocks and back‐to‐back meetings and phone notifications from Slack and Asana and Teams and Trello, and the push feature, walking pads underneath our desks versus taking a break to go for a walk, passive usage of ‘just text me if you need anything’ while on vacation, or sneaking a peek at our missed messages while at the basketball game or watching dance practice—are the signs, symptoms, and sins of our rationalization.
Now, in this productivity era (forever revolutionized by a global pandemic) where we are always attached to our productivity, I propose that we can trust our senses again. What might it look like to rediscover, or for many of us (yes, us: because who I am to not be consumed by the smog of ‘BS’: busyness‐for‐busyness‐sake‐syndrome?), discover for the first time what it means to live and lean into the quiet side of ourselves. Quiet, not to be confused with nothingness or lacking productivity or neglecting one's pursuit of meaningfulness. But instead, a quietness that privileges the instinctual beauty of what our senses compel of us: to deepen our relationships through quality time and intimacy, to center ourselves within the peculiarly beautiful moments that come‐and‐go fleetingly like the seconds of a baby's belly laugh, or to tend to our souls and heart that we might see one another more fully.
We often are intrigued by the routines and schedules of those who are the most successful—what time they wake up, how much they get done in a day, their workout regimen, or how many books they read in a year. And we assume, falsely, that those are the trappings (literally, traps) of how they've made it to success. In Busy is a Four‐Letter Word, Kishshana offers an alternative thesis: what if the patterns that shape our successes and triumphs and conquering's are formed and informed by how busy‐less we are? What if it is only by asking what we can give up, what stuff we can surrender, what northbound trains we can miss that permits us to unravel the logic of success in this world? This is a book about counter‐logic, counter‐rationalism, and counterculture. Through anecdotes that nudge at the human condition, and through television icons that mirror the complexity of our ordinariness, and through laughter that pierces the seriousness we often veil ourselves with, Kishshana invites us to reconsider what we hold true about ourselves individually, communally, and organizationally.
Nagging at many of you who have picked‐up this book is a simple question: how can I lead a deeply meaningful and robustly successful life by doing less? The answer, too, is simple: by being at peace within oneself and with one's senses.
In that peace, you might not have much, but you'll have it all.
1
Gottfried Wilhelm Leibniz, 1704, New Essays on Human Understanding, Preface, pp. 150
“I'm so busy, I've had this headache for three years!”
– Jean, The Golden Girls
Picture it: Miami, 1985. Four fabulous ladies were living together and taking on the world, one cheesecake at a time. Of course, I'm talking about the one and only The Golden Girls. As a kid watching that show, I never imagined the profound life lessons it would impart to me. I was a “busy” kid. As a Gen Xer I was also a latchkey kid so I found things to do with my time. My days were full of school, the library, books, and church! In middle school, I was class president, morning announcer, and lead singer in the chorus. And at church, I was in the choir, in Pathfinders Club (shout out to all my fellow 7th Day Kids), on the drill team, and in drum core … jusssst to name a few. I would stay up for hours into the middle of the night reading books. I'm not gonna lie. I loved all the inappropriate stuff for my age like Harlequin romance and Danielle Steele novels right alongside the Babysitters Club and the Hardy Boys. My fourth‐grade teacher, Mrs. Spradley, told my parents that these types of books were “advanced.” She should not have said that! All my dad heard was “advanced” and said, “Well, at least she's reading! My parents were just happy I was keeping myself busy. I wanted to be a grown‐up so bad! They always looked like they had something important to do and somewhere to be. So I wanted IN (queue my first job at 14)!
I didn't know why then (even though I know now) but one episode that has really stuck with me over the years is when, in The Golden Girls, Dorothy's friend Jean visits. Jean laments, “I'm so busy, I've had this headache for three years!” To which the ever‐wise Sophia retorts, “Busy is a four‐letter word for idiots!” Shoot! Maybe I am just speaking for myself.
As a multi‐hyphenate entrepreneur, I would stay up for hours tip‐tapping at my keyboard. I used to subscribe to the “sleep is for suckas” motto. I want you to know that the only sucka there was … ME!! It left me tired, caffeine addicted, bedraggled, anxiety driven, and eating and shopping my feelings away. My body was crying out so badly that I developed sciatica, but I had a goal to be successful. My challenge was that I didn't know what success meant … to ME!
This relentless pursuit of busyness masquerading as success is actually making us sick – physically, mentally, emotionally, financially, and relationally. It's leaving us drained, dragging, anxious, and disconnected from what really matters in life.
In the pages ahead, I share insights from my own journey as a professional high achiever, entrepreneur, first‐gen career woman, solo mom, and human being who got caught up in the toxic cycle of busyness. You'll learn my strategies for slowing down, streamlining your life, and prioritizing your health over a packed schedule. To be clear, I don't have it all figured out and I wouldn't trust anyone who says they do.
This book almost didn't get written because I was too … busy. I hemmed and hawed about what to share, how to share it, and what would happen IF I really shared my journey to doing less so that I had a shot at achieving more. I was sure that I'd never find the time. With work travel, moving my life from the East Coast to the South, getting my “queenager” off to college, picking up the pieces of my business that nearly went bankrupt because of institutional clients with a lack of integrity who preyed on small businesses and whose leadership had no regard for paying their bills on time or keeping their word (and I am being kind and generous here because if I ever see these so‐called leaders in the street … baaaaaybeeee) alongside what seemed like a never‐ending trip of WTF is going on here, I tip‐tapped on this keyboard. If you read that and thought HOLY SMOKES, you have a lot going on, then, yeah … me, too. My reality: I was afraid that you wouldn't think I knew my stuff (oooh, that's one I will get to in later chapters).
My mom often makes the joke that I came into this world running and ready to go from Day 1. I was busy! I learned to walk early, speak early, and was reading by three years old. I was selected for the gifted and talented program in second grade where the message that being “smart” was a thing to be celebrated was reinforced. And yet, at every parent‐teacher conference, teachers would tell my parents that I was a “busybody” so much so that my mom told my middle school social studies teacher not to call her during her workday anymore because if I wasn't disrupting the class (I wasn't) then what was the problem? By high school, I was running EVERY DARN THING! With a job! And I studied abroad in Budapest, Hungary. And started my own choir. Dang y'all, I was building a foundation of B‐U‐S‐Y. It all looked great on paper and helped me secure a scholarship to college. Buuuuuut! Let's put the cookie jar where we all can get to them. To my untrained 17‐year‐old eye, the badge of “busy” is often worn with honor. Yet, this relentless pursuit of busyness not only exhausts us but paradoxically hinders our ability to achieve true productivity and satisfaction. But I wouldn't learn that until years later.
Drawing from more than two decades of experience as a C‐suite executive and consultant, I've witnessed firsthand the detrimental effects of our culture's obsession with busyness. This book is born from a blend of personal insights, professional engagements, and a heartfelt desire to shift the paradigm from being busy to being impactful.
Maybe you're like Darlene, a senior executive juggling multiple roles both at work and home. Despite her accomplishments, she felt perpetually drained and unfulfilled.
Or maybe you're more like James, an entrepreneur whose startup's rapid growth was both his dream and his nightmare due to his unsustainable workload. Even these small bits from their stories echo a common theme in today's work culture, and they are not isolated incidents but rather reflections of a widespread challenge that demands attention and action.
These everyday leaders' stories propelled me to write this book. My goal is to guide you – the overwhelmed professional, leader, caregiver, community advocate, entrepreneur, or student – toward a path where success is not measured by how full your schedule is, but by how meaningful your actions are. Through the pages of this book, you will discover innovative strategies and practical tools that will empower you to declutter your commitments, focus on what truly matters, and reclaim your time and energy.
I love a good sitcom. I'll even binge watch a juicy reality series (hello Married at First Site and Love Is Blind). But my classics still have lessons that ring true today. In this book, you'll encounter numerous references to two beloved shows of mine – The Golden Girls and A Different World. As I reflect on why I chose these as touchstones for this book, I'm struck by how perfectly these shows embody the journey from youthful ambition to seasoned wisdom. The Golden Girls gives us a quartet of vibrant women in their well‐seasoned years, each with a lifetime of experiences behind them. They've weathered life's storms, learned hard lessons, and come out the other side with a clearer understanding of what truly matters. Their witty banter and cheesecake‐fueled problem‐solving sessions remind us that sometimes, slowing down and connecting with friends is the most productive thing we can do.
On the flip side, A Different World captures the energy and idealism of youth. Set on a college campus, it showcases young adults taking risks, chasing dreams, and often stumbling as they try to figure out who they are and what they want from life. The contrast between these two shows mirrors our own journey from the frenetic pace of our early careers to the more measured approach that is supposed to come with experience.
Throughout this book, you'll find me returning to characters from both shows as I explore different aspects of doing less to achieve more. Whether it's Sophia's no‐nonsense wisdom, Whitley's journey from entitled princess to self‐aware professional, or Dwayne's evolution from awkward nerd to confident achiever, these characters offer valuable lessons on prioritizing what's truly important on the road to success. I draw parallels between their fictional experiences and real‐world for streamlining your life and focusing on what matters most. So don't be surprised if you find yourself nodding along as I reference Dorothy's dry wit or Freddie's passionate activism – these characters aren't just entertainment; they're guides on our journey to a more balanced, fulfilling life. And just like how these shows tackled serious issues with humor and heart, I approach challenges with a mix of laughter and deep reflection. After all, as Rose Nylund would say, “The older you get, the better you get. Unless you're a banana.”
Before diving in, let me ask you something. Do you have a to‐do list? Whether it's on paper, your computer, or your phone, how do you feel when you jot down so many tasks that you're scribbling in the margins or on the back, and you still have more to add? And how about when the day ends and you've only crossed off a couple of things? If you're anything like me, that sense of defeat and overwhelm creeps in faster than piping hot donuts coming off the conveyer belt at Krispy Kreme when the “HOT” light is on. Even if you've somehow managed to tick off 1,347 items from your list, you still feel like a failure. Because at the end of the day, what good is checking things off your to‐do list if you're too burned out to enjoy your accomplishments? As Rose so wisely stated, “It's like life is a giant weenie roast, and I'm the biggest weenie!” Let's stop being weenies, shall we?
The Golden Girls is a beloved television sitcom that aired from 1985 to 1992, focusing on the lives of four older women sharing a home in Miami, Florida. The show blends humor, friendship, and social commentary, tackling issues relevant to older women with wit and warmth. The series revolves around four vibrant, single women in their golden years who become unlikely roommates. Blanche Devereaux, a Southern belle and the owner of the house, opens her home to fellow widow Rose Nylund and divorcée Dorothy Zbornak after they respond to an ad on a grocery store bulletin board. In the pilot episode, they are joined by Dorothy's 80‐year‐old mother, Sophia Petrillo, after her retirement home burns down.
Dorothy Zbornak (Bea Arthur):
A sharp‐witted, sarcastic substitute teacher from Brooklyn, New York
Known for her deadpan humor and cutting remarks
Often the voice of reason among the group
Struggles with her self‐esteem due to her failed marriage
Rose Nylund (Betty White):
A sweet, naive woman from the fictional town of St. Olaf, Minnesota
Known for her quirky stories and often misunderstood comments
Possesses hidden talents, including psychology knowledge and piano skills
Happily widowed and maintains a positive, sometimes childlike outlook on life
Blanche Devereaux (Rue McClanahan):
A flirtatious Southern belle and owner of the house
Known for her man‐hungry ways and vivacious personality
Proud of her looks and charm, often exaggerating her age
Struggles with aging and self‐worth issues
Sophia Petrillo (Estelle Getty):
Dorothy's feisty Sicilian mother with a sharp tongue
Known for her “Picture this …” stories and brutally honest comments
Provides comic relief and unexpected wisdom
Originally planned as an occasional guest star but became a regular due to her popularity
A Different World is a spin‐off from The Cosby Show that aired from 1987 to 1993. It originally centered on Denise Huxtable (Lisa Bonet) and the life of students at Hillman College, a fictional historically Black college in Virginia. The show evolved to focus more broadly on the experiences of a diverse group of students navigating college life. It tackled significant social issues such as institutionalized racism, HIV/AIDS, and sexual assault, making it a groundbreaking series for its time.
Denise Huxtable (Lisa Bonet):
The original protagonist, daughter of Dr. Huxtable from
The Cosby Show
Struggles to find her place and identity at Hillman College
Known for her free‐spirited and somewhat naive nature
Whitley Gilbert (Jasmine Guy):
A Southern belle with a wealthy background
Known for her snobbish and materialistic demeanor
Evolves into a more compassionate and grounded character over the series
Dwayne Wayne (Kadeem Hardison):
A nerdy, intelligent student and future engineer with distinctive flip‐up glasses
Known for his crush on Denise and, later, his relationship with Whitley
Grows into a confident and successful individual
Freddie Brooks (Cree Summer):
A free‐spirited, socially conscious student
Known for her activism and unique fashion sense
Often provides a countercultural perspective on issues
Jaleesa Vinson (Dawnn Lewis):
A mature, responsible student who returns to college after a failed marriage
Known for her no‐nonsense attitude and strong work ethic
Acts as a mentor and big sister figure to the younger students
Ron Johnson (Darryl M. Bell):
Dwayne's best friend and roommate
Known for his entrepreneurial spirit and love of partying
Struggles with balancing his ambitions and personal life
Kimberly Reese (Charnele Brown):
A premed student with a strong sense of duty and responsibility
Known for her serious and focused demeanor
Faces the pressures of academic and personal challenges
The Golden Girls and A Different World have left indelible marks on television history. The Golden Girls broke new ground by portraying independent mature women and discussing important issues like race, class, and sexual identity. It remains a beloved classic, praised for its humor and heart. A Different World offered a realistic and nuanced portrayal of Black college life, addressing social issues that were often ignored by mainstream media. It provided representation and inspiration for many viewers, showing that college was not only attainable but also a place for growth and self‐discovery. Both sitcoms give voice to voices normally silenced by the status quo. The field of leadership is dominated by the status quo. I learned the rules, realized they didn't really work for me, and decided to turn the mic up on everyday leaders who want to achieve more and are exhausted by having to always do more.
As you embark on this journey to reclaim your life from the clutches of busyness, you can take a page from these iconic shows. They remind us that life is not about how much we do but about the quality of our experiences and the relationships we build along the way. So, let's slow down, savor the moments, and find joy in the simple things – just like these beloved TV characters did. After all, life is too short to be anything but meaningful.
Grab a slice of cheesecake, thank your friend (that's MEEEEE) for being a friend, and let's get started on reclaiming our health and sanity from the busyness trap. After all, as Blanche would say, “I've been having a good time, and there wasn't even a man in the room!”
Bloop!!!
Picture it: an early Monday morning, the smell of coffee brewing, and the faint sound of The Golden Girls theme song playing in the background. Yes, “thank you for being a friend,” indeed. My name is Kishshana Palmer, and just like the fabulous ladies of that beloved show believed, I'm here to tell you that being busy is not all it's cracked up to be.
For years, I prided myself on being the multitasking queen, juggling numerous tasks like Blanche Devereaux juggling her suitors. One of my best friends, AJ, would often tease me about my ability to talk on the phone while cooking, while putting away all the dishes and tidying up without missing a beat. But, spoiler alert, it turns out that multitasking is as effective as Rose Nylund trying to explain St. Olaf customs – it sounds impressive but often ends up being a hot mess. Oooh, I love The Golden Girls!
Let me take you back to the days when I believed that having a packed schedule was synonymous with success. Most days, after moving swiftly through morning devotion, I would shower, get dressed, and get the kiddo ready for a.m. drop‐off. I'd race for the train, often with seconds to spare before the door closes, headed to the office. Once there, I began my daily cupid shuffle of responding to emails, often while on a conference call, and simultaneously planning my to‐do list for the day. I thought I was getting so much done, but in reality, I was spreading myself thinner than Sophia Petrillo's patience when dealing with Rose's stories.
It took me a really long time to accept that multitasking was a myth, a lie we tell ourselves to feel productive. Studies have shown that multitasking actually dilutes our focus, reduces productivity, and increases stress. I felt like I was losing brain cells with every open tab on my laptop. It was like trying to have a meaningful conversation while Sophia interjects with a “Picture it, Sicily …” anecdote every few seconds. Distracting, right?
Research by cognitive psychologists has consistently debunked the effectiveness of multitasking. One study conducted at Stanford University1 found that heavy multitaskers were less effective at filtering out irrelevant information and took longer to switch between tasks. In other words, multitasking turns your brain into the organizational equivalent of travelers grounded at the airport trying to get the one available flight home. Chaos.
A study by the American Psychological Association found that multitasking can reduce productivity by up to 40%.2 When we switch tasks, it takes time for our brains to adjust and refocus, leading to lost time and increased chances of making mistakes. It's like trying to read a map, text, and drive. We all think we can do it, but the number of texting while driving accidents say otherwise.