Raising Smart Kids For Dummies - Marlene Targ Brill - E-Book

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Marlene Targ Brill

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Beschreibung

So, you wanna turn Junior into a smarty-pants? What parent doesn't? Thing is, kids nowadays are more independent than ever and aren't always receptive to what parents want. In fact, if you tell your kids that studying is "good for them," they're more than likely to mumble, "Yeah, sure," in your general direction and head off to do something "fun." Sharpening the minds of your youngsters presents more challenges than climbing Mt. Everest, and the responsibility of making your kids use more of their brain cells can be overwhelming - even when you don't encounter resistance. Raising smart kids requires long-term commitment, sacrifice, and diligence - not to mention the patience of a saint. And as long as you don't obsess about being the perfect parent, you will be able to enjoy your kids' journey of self-discovery right along with them. But how do you accomplish this? How do you overcome the resistance? How do you tackle the overwhelming task of not only helping your children succeed in school, but also increasing their ability to make their own way in the world? That's where Raising Smart Kids For Dummies steps in to help. Written in easy-to-understand terms (and absolutely no slick psycho-babble), this book gives you sound advice on encouraging your kids to set their sights high and achieve success, whether at school, with friends, or in your community. And you don't have to be a new parent to gain insight from this book; experienced parents can reap rewards with the help of this book in their effort to raise fulfilled children. Here's just a sampling of what you'll find in Raising Smart Kids For Dummies: * Recognizing the characteristics of smart kids * Knowing when to push - and when not to * Disciplining your kids in a positive way * Growing smarter kids from healthier bodies * Planning the development of your kids' brains: From newborns to teenagers * Taking your smart kids beyond high school * Eliminating brain drain from school-skipping, drug abuse, and raging hormones * Top Ten lists of family characteristics that nurture smart kids, what smart kids read, and resources for bolstering parents' confidence You've heard it said a thousand times: The children are the future. Children have such potential, but rarely live up to it. Why take this chance with your own kids? Make the commitment to prepare your kids for life on their own. With Raising Smart Kids For Dummies, you, too, can achieve success - and have a little fun along the way!

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Raising Smart Kids For Dummies®

by Marlene Targ Brill

Raising Smart Kids For Dummies®

Published byWiley Publishing, Inc.111 River St.Hoboken, NJ 07030-5774www.wiley.com

Copyright © 2003 by Wiley Publishing, Inc., Indianapolis, Indiana

Published by Wiley Publishing, Inc., Indianapolis, Indiana

Published simultaneously in Canada

No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, scanning, or otherwise, except as permitted under Sections 107 or 108 of the 1976 United States Copyright Act, without either the prior written permission of the Publisher, or authorization through payment of the appropriate per-copy fee to the Copyright Clearance Center, 222 Rosewood Drive, Danvers, MA 01923, 978-750-8400, fax 978-646-8700. Requests to the Publisher for permission should be addressed to the Legal Department, Wiley Publishing, Inc., 10475 Crosspoint Blvd., Indianapolis, IN 46256, 317-572-3447, fax 317-572-4447, or e-mail [email protected].

Trademarks: Wiley, the Wiley Publishing logo, For Dummies, the Dummies Man logo, A Reference for the Rest of Us!, The Dummies Way, Dummies Daily, The Fun and Easy Way, Dummies.com and related trade dress are trademarks or registered trademarks of Wiley Publishing, Inc., in the United States and other countries, and may not be used without written permission. All other trademarks are the property of their respective owners. Wiley Publishing, Inc., is not associated with any product or vendor mentioned in this book.

LIMIT OF LIABILITY/DISCLAIMER OF WARRANTY: While the publisher and author have used their best efforts in preparing this book, they make no representations or warranties with respect to the accuracy or completeness of the contents of this book and specifically disclaim any implied warranties of merchantability or fitness for a particular purpose. No warranty may be created or extended by sales representatives or written sales materials. The advice and strategies contained herein may not be suitable for your situation. You should consult with a professional where appropriate. Neither the publisher nor author shall be liable for any loss of profit or any other commercial damages, including but not limited to special, incidental, consequential, or other damages.

For general information on our other products and services or to obtain technical support, please contact our Customer Care Department within the U.S. at 877-762-2974, outside the U.S. at 317-572-3993, or fax 317-572-4002.

Wiley also publishes its books in a variety of electronic formats. Some content that appears in print may not be available in electronic books.

Library of Congress Control Number: 2003101877

ISBN: 0-7645-1765-1

Manufactured in the United States of America

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

1B/RZ/QV/QT/IN

About the Author

Marlene Targ Brill is an author, early childhood specialist, and special educator. More important, she is the mother of a great kid. Her background of multiple degrees in education, 13 years on the front lines of teaching and training other teachers, and practical experience on the home front contribute to the parenting focus and practical suggestions you find in this book.

Marlene has written 50 books and countless articles for readers of all ages. Her Keys to Parenting a Child with Autism has received a Parent’s Choice Award — so she knows how to make raising smart kids a readable topic and how important a job parenting can be.

Dedication

This book is dedicated to all parents who journey down the awesome parenting road, and to their smart children, who will grow up just fine. I also want to thank my hubby, Richard, and daughter, Alison, for giving me the wonderful and wacky family experiences that helped me write this book.

Author’s Acknowledgments

Every book has a story, and this one involves lots of helpful people. I never would have embarked on this book without the professional guidance of my agent, Grace Freedson; prodding of my hubby, Richard; and support from my experienced writer’s group: Charlotte Herman, Carolyn Crimi, Mary Jane Miller, Fay Robinson, and Mary Monsell.

Once into the book, countless folks from various areas lent their expertise: Iris Gimbel, speech and language; Lucy Klocksin, reading; Janet Emmerman, science; Robin Campbell, physical fitness; and Arlene Erlbach, special education. Special thanks go to my teen consultants: Alison Brill (yep, my kid!), Rebecca Targ, and Scott Klocksin. Thanks to Tere Drenth, the editor who fine-tuned the manuscript. I am indebted to you all and to the parents, including my own, who gave me inspiration for this book.

Publisher’s Acknowledgments

We’re proud of this book; please send us your comments through our Dummies online registration form located at www.dummies.com/register/.

Some of the people who helped bring this book to market include the following:

Acquisitions, Editorial, and Media Development

Project Editors: Tere Drenth, Marcia Johnson

Acquisitions Editor: Pam Mourouzis, Norm Crampton

Acquisitions Coordinator: Holly Grimes

Technical Editor: Sue Drenth

Editorial Manager: Michelle Hacker

Editorial Assistant: Elizabeth Rea

Cover Photos: © Philip James Corwin/CORBIS

Cartoons: Rich Tennant, www.the5thwave.com

Production

Project Coordinator: Dale White

Layout and Graphics: Seth Conley, Michael Kruzil, Tiffany Muth

Proofreaders: Dave Faust, John Greenough, Brian Walls, TECHBOOKS Production Services

Indexer: TECHBOOKS Production Services

Publishing and Editorial for Consumer Dummies

Diane Graves Steele, Vice President and Publisher, Consumer Dummies

Joyce Pepple, Acquisitions Director, Consumer Dummies

Kristin A. Cocks, Product Development Director, Consumer Dummies

Michael Spring, Vice President and Publisher, Travel

Brice Gosnell, Publishing Director, Travel

Suzanne Jannetta, Editorial Director, Travel

Publishing for Technology Dummies

Andy Cummings, Vice President and Publisher, Dummies Technology/General User

Composition Services

Gerry Fahey, Vice President of Production Services

Debbie Stailey, Director of Composition Services

Contents

Title

Introduction

About This Book

Conventions Used in This Book

Foolish Assumptions

How This Book Is Organized

Icons Used in This Book

Where to Go from Here

Part I : Getting Off to a Good Start

Chapter 1: Defining Smarts

Recognizing Characteristics of Smart Kids

Keeping Kids Smart As They Grow

Chapter 2: Realizing That You Can Raise a Brain

Assessing What You Already Know

Taking a Look at Other Parents’ Tricks of the Trade

Dispelling Parenting Myths

Getting a Handle on Growth and Development

Evaluating Whether You’re Pushing Too Hard

Opening Doors to Success

Accepting Your Role as Teacher

Chapter 3: Disciplining in a Positive Way

Accentuating the Positive

Troubleshooting When Kids Misbehave (And You’re Tearing Your Hair Out)

Taking Advantage of Teachable Moments

Chapter 4: Growing Smarter Minds from Healthier Bodies

Keeping Your Kids Physically Healthy

Feeding Brain Cells

Walk, Run, Hop: Making Fitness Part of Your Kids’ Lives

Ensuring That Kids Get Enough Zzzs

Part II : The Early Years: Birth to Kindergarten

Chapter 5: Before Your Baby Is Born

Enjoying a Positive Pregnancy

Revving Up Baby in the Womb

Chapter 6: Energizing Your Baby through the Senses

Becoming a Brain Architect

Including Random Acts of Play (An Infant’s Daily Work Routine)

Decorating Your Baby’s Room

Talking to Your Baby — Even Though She Can’t Talk Back!

Reading to Your Baby

Chapter 7: Pumping Up Your Smart Toddler/Preschooler

Learning to Play, Playing to Learn

Talking, Talking, and More Talking

Listening to Your Child

Reading to Your Whirlwind

Chapter 8: Setting Boundaries That Matter

Drawing Lines in the Sand: Identifying Priorities

Rearranging Bedrooms for Growth and Learning

Trusting Toddlers and Their Preschool Partners in Crime

Chapter 9: You’re Not Alone! Finding Help and Support

Going Places with Your Little One

Dealing with Day Care

Attending Pint-Size School: Preschool

Chapter 10: Preparing for Big-Kid School

Positioning School As Number One

Building Readiness for School

Getting a Leg-up: Kindergarten Retention

Advocating for Your Child

Part III : The Eager-to-Learn Years: Elementary School

Chapter 11: Nurturing Your Smart Student at Home

Becoming Too Intense about Smartness

Exercising Your Child’s Brain

Chapter 12: Monitoring Media

Choosing Smart Electronic Media

Using the Internet: The Good, the Bad, — and What to Do about It

Chapter 13: Launching Lifelong Study Habits

Positioning Schoolwork as Number One at Home

Devising a Homework-Friendly Environment

Making the Most of Homework

Preparing for Tests

Chapter 14: Connecting with School

Analyzing Grades and Homework

Evaluating Your Genius’s Smarts

Communicating with Teachers

Going to School: Participating and Volunteering

Chapter 15: Developing Smarts for Success Outside of School

Getting Along with Family and Friends

Adding Responsibilities

Participating in Extra Activities

Appreciating the Value of Money

Chapter 16: Deciding to Switch Learning Situations

Reviewing Your Child’s ABCs

Choosing Another School

Surviving New-School Blues

Schooling at Home: The Cozy Alternative

Part IV : The Know-It-All Years: Middle School and High School

Chapter 17: Working with the Teenage Psyche

Admitting That You Have a Different Species in the House

Remembering Parenting Skills That Should Never Change

Chapter 18: Eliminating Brain Drains

Skipping School-Skipping

Reversing Slipping Grades

Ending Substance Abuse

Taming the Hostile Teen Beast

Separating Your Teen from the Anti-Education Crowd

Dealing with Failed Relationships

Holding Off Raging Hormones

Chapter 19: Thinking Beyond High School

Transforming Interests into Career Options

Approaching Dreaded Interviews

Deciding on College — or Not

Letting Go: The Hardest Part about Being a Smart Parent

Part V : The Part of Tens

Chapter 20: Ten Family Characteristics That Nurture Smart Kids

Willing to Go the Extra Mile for Each Other

Respecting Each Other

Delighting in Each Other

Communicating with Each Other

Growing from Each Other and from Mistakes

Valuing Effort, Not Product

Solving Problems Together

Creating an Environment that Values Learning

Reacting Well to Successes and Failures

Showing and Saying, “I Love You”

Chapter 21: Ten Popular Reads from Preschool to Teen Years

Playing with Non-Boring Board Books

Reading-Aloud Books

Engaging Primary-Graders with Books

Looking into Longer Easy Readers and Short Chapter Books

Appealing to Middle-Graders through Books

Jumping into Jr. High (Ages 12–15) with Books

Knowing Classics that High School Expects

Turning on High Schoolers to Reading

Choosing Magazines to Read

Chapter 22: Ten Resources That Bolster Parent Confidence

Finding Out More about Pregnancy

Reading Your Way through Parenthood

Locating a Parenting Magazine

Surfing for the Perfect Parenting Web Sites

Keeping Kids Healthy and Safe

Identifying Gifted Resources

Finding Special Needs Information

Targeting Specific Parent Groups

Finding Educational Toys and Books

Planning Fun and Well-Rounded Activities

Introduction

Congratulations! You’re taking a giant leap into the world of Raising Smart Kids For Dummies. You’re smart enough to know that being a parent means more than cleaning bottoms and wiping tears: You want highachieving kids.

Parenting can be incredibly fun. But sharpening minds also brings more challenges than climbing Mt. Everest. Sometimes, the responsibility of increasing your kid’s brain cells can be overwhelming. That’s where Raising Smart Kids For Dummies comes in.

This book helps you encourage your kids to set their sights high and achieve success, whether at school, with friends, or in the community. In these pages, you find suggestions for easing your parenting anxiety and putting out fires, while raising smart, fulfilled kids in the process.

This book also helps put your parenting gig into perspective. Raising smart kids requires long-term sacrifice and diligence — not to mention the patience of a saint — but don’t obsess about being the perfect parent, or you won’t be able to enjoy the journey with your kids. Having fun is as essential to your child’s success as all the other ideas in this book combined. I want you to have so much fun raising little Einsteins (well-rounded Einsteins, anyway) that you forget you’re molding minds.

About This Book

In this book, you get plenty of practical advice. I go for easy, low-cost alternatives that matter most in getting your child mentally, physically, and emotionally prepared to succeed. I don’t, however, suggest anything that hasn’t been tested in my home or classrooms.

This book gives you the scoop on what works and what doesn’t in growing smarter kids. You find everything from arranging baby rooms to promote language skills to identifying optimum conditions for studying calculus.

This book helps you explore the range of skills involved in being truly successful, so you can decide for yourself what “smart” means in the grand scheme of your lives. Remember that being smart means more than getting all As.

This book helps you match activities to your child’s level of maturity. You can’t expect your advanced 9-month-old wonder who speaks in four-word sentences to pass a spelling test. Therefore, I give you tons of suggestions for making the most of each stage and knowing when to push on to the next.

This book helps you discover the motivating activities and interactions that you share with your kids naturally. By helping you discover what comes naturally, you gain the confidence to orchestrate effortless repeat performances. Then you can enjoy your bundles of joy, while also having the certainty that you’re bringing out their best.

This book offers great tips for turning off the tube and getting your couch potatoes excited about being top performers. I prepare you for inevitable parenting trouble spots by offering preventive measures that thwart the most sluggish lazybones.

This book dispels myths and helps you sort through corporate messages that pressure you to pay big bucks for educational products based on dubious theories.

In this book, I offer realistic guidelines and suggestions to bolster your innate parenting know-how. I try to eliminate educational jargon and psychological mumbo-jumbo (although I may slip in just a little — with easy-to-understand definitions, of course — to keep you abreast of the latest terminology).

Conventions Used in This Book

Throughout this book, I use the pronouns he or she. To give equal time to each gender, I alternate pronoun usage: Female pronouns show up in even-numbered chapters, and male pronouns go in odd-numbered chapters — no pun intended!

Foolish Assumptions

The major assumption made in this book is that you want to raise kids who are smart, but also well-rounded. You want your kids to shoot to the top of their classes and stay there. You want them to appreciate art and the outdoors, be leaders and mentors to other kids, and be kind and caring people.

Another assumption is that you spend significant amounts of time with one or more youngsters. You’re probably a parent, but you may also be a grandparent, wild-and-crazy aunt or uncle, coach, or teacher.

My final assumption is that you’re willing to go the extra mile for your kids. You are ready, willing, and able to put your kids first — within reason, of course!

How This Book Is Organized

This book includes five major parts that are divided into 22 chapters. The following sections give you an overview of what you can expect.

Part I: Getting Off to a Good Start

Being smart encompasses more than acing tests, although I admit acing tests doesn’t hurt any kid. The first part of this book defines what being smart means and discusses the role parents play in the success of their offspring. This part sets the framework for smart parent-child interactions and gives you tools to evaluate how healthy bodies and minds affect the smarts of every child.

Part II: The Early Years: Birth to Kindergarten

Babies are more than miniature adults. They need different kinds of attention and available activities — not to mention loads of hugs — than adults need. This part shares the latest feedback about activating brain cells in the womb, awakening infant senses, and preparing smart toddlers for the world outside home. You find hints about how to set boundaries and how to play in unique ways that stimulate your baby’s little mind and senses.

Part III: The Eager-to-Learn Years: Elementary School

Because you’ve probably reached for this book with an eye toward making your child an academic genius, I divide this part and Part IV by levels of schooling. In this part, I discuss the nuts and bolts of preparing your kids for elementary school and ensuring they take the school by storm. Stickier subjects, such as homework, parent involvement in school, changing schools, and identifying giftedness, are also front and center.

Part IV: The Know-It-All Years: Middle School and High School

Teenagers are a different breed. Although most of what works for younger kids still applies to teens, much changes, too. This section introduces you to the world of teens, which includes friends, time at school (with emphasis on the extra-curricular activities), and home life — in that order — and gives you tips for ensuring the correct balance. The chapters in this part move you toward the ultimate smart-parenting experience: launching your child to function independently at college or on the job.

Part V: The Part of Tens

This part gives you several bonus chapters that are short and sweet. You find ten family traits that nurture smart kids, ten favorite reading options for various age groups, and ten top-notch resources to help you raise capable people.

Icons Used in This Book

Icons in the margins of this book flag special information. These symbols give you clues about the material coming up on the page. You then get to decide whether the material is a “must-read” or something you consider interesting but choose to skip.

This icon alerts you to creative new ideas for raising smart kids. It also points out some ideas that have worked for generations — possibly even on you, when you were a kid!

This icon marks paragraphs in which I define educational or psychological terms in everyday language.

Sometimes, the best way to highlight a point is by giving you a real-life example from a parent who’s on the front lines. This icon highlights those stories and techniques.

If you remember nothing else, tuck away these gems for future use.

This symbol signals you to stop and think about what you’re doing, because your actions may backfire.

Where to Go from Here

You have a choice now and can do any of the following:

Read this book from cover to cover, which would thrill me immensely. If that’s not practical for you, however, you may at least skim the entire book, especially if you’re a first-time parent. A quick scan gives you some inkling as to what your future holds, which may or may not be comforting, depending upon your current baby-induced-sleep-deprived state and how many sibling battles you broke up today.

Read about topics that are relevant to your current situation. The For Dummies format makes targeting specific issues easy, because each part, chapter, and section is self-contained. Don’t worry about needing to read earlier material to grasp later sections. I suggest where to go, if I think another section helps or enhances your understanding of the current one.

Part I covers smart parenting suggestions for any age, so I encourage you to look over that material. Beyond that, however, parts cover different levels of maturation with age-specific information and tips.

Decide to include sidebars in your reading pleasure. The shaded areas, called sidebars in publishing-speak, consist of material that may be of interest to you. Or, if they don’t interest you, feel free to skip them: Sidebar information is a bonus, but not integral to understanding the chapter.

Where do you go from here? Simple. Curl up in a comfy chair and enjoy your journey into the world of raising smart kids.

Part I

Getting Off to a Good Start

In this part . . .

Gardeners know how to grow top-notch crops. They determine which plants thrive best under available conditions, plan their optimum placement, and nourish the seeds with plant food and water. Plants that receive the most attention thrive, blossoming into colorful fruits and flowers.

Kids work the same way. With kids, you lay the groundwork for the fruits of your labor by understanding what’s important for their success. Then you nurture your seedlings with positive messages and the right environment to grow up smarter and happier. Chapter 1 helps you define the concept of smart, while Chapters 2 and 3 help you prepare the soil that allows your kids to do their best. Chapter 4 adds information about kid fertilizer — the ways to keep your child healthy and ready to learn.

Chapter 1

Defining Smarts

In This Chapter

Bringing your vision of smart kids into focus

Identifying six basic qualities of smarter, higher-achieving kids

Helping to develop your kid’s smarts into adulthood

You may as well acknowledge this fact now: The challenge of parenting has never been greater. Your kids experience endless choices, new technology, and outside forces — such as media — that bombard them from babyhood on and compete with you for their attention.

In such a fast-paced, highly competitive world, you have to get your parenting priorities straight early-on. If you want to raise smart kids, you must define what being smart means to you. Then you need to understand which resources give kids the ability to succeed. Only after careful consideration can you identify how these concepts translate into a smarter style of parenting.

This chapter explores those basic, albeit intertwined, characteristics that make getting higher grades and pursuing unusual talents possible.

Recognizing Characteristics of Smart Kids

Do you have wild and crazy dreams for your darlings, ones that may have started in the cradle? Perhaps you envision any or all of the following:

Babies who spring from the womb talking and walking

Preschoolers who read encyclopedias and compute algebra problems

Kids who make the honor roll every semester and receive so many first-place blue ribbons in the science fair that NASA calls

High schoolers who lead the school play, are first chair in the orchestra, and score so well on college boards that every Ivy League college sends four-year scholarship offerings

These goals, in addition to being a bit unrealistic, demonstrate only one aspect of being smart. Truly smart kids need more than lofty goals and pipe dreams to make it in today’s cutthroat world.

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!

Lesen Sie weiter in der vollständigen Ausgabe!