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None of us have all the answers all of the time, especially when it comes to our own life. We all need a little objective guidance from time to time when we want to improve or change something about ourselves and our lives. It is not always easy to find someone who has the ability to help us change for the better and one thing is for sure, no-one is going to do it for us. This workbook is your tool, your very own pocket life coach to help you rediscover the healthiest, most productive, positive and creative you.
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Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2008
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Have you ever had a dream hangover? “What’s one of those?” I sense you ask? Well, it’s that sinking feeling you get when you wake up from a really nice dream, where life is so much more satisfying, free and easy, and you have seemingly unlimited powers of skill and confidence. This contrasts starkly with the cold light and reality of the dawn of another day in your real life. Damn those sweet dreams, we enjoy them at the time, but they don’t half match up poorly with reality sometimes. It often happens the other way around of course, when you have a nightmare and it’s such a relief to wake up and find out you are not chained to a desk in a burning office building or sentenced by a judge, who looks remarkably like your mother-in-law, to a lifetime of watching paint dry on the walls of a beautiful city that you have been banished from for ever.
Dreams are powerful things. They are part of our everyday experience. We are glad when the bad ones don’t come true and we are sad when, each day we awake to find that we seem to be getting no closer to making the good ones a reality. Sometimes dreams do come true, small ones and big ones, good ones and not so good ones. We do seem to have the capacity to turn imagination and fantasy into our reality. These dreams are slightly different, I know, as they are deep desires and hopes from the heart, but I’m sure you get the message. Deep in our psyches we have many hopes and fears, and these often show themselves in strange dramas that play out while we are sleeping, coming to life, as it were. Sometimes though, they can jump out of our dreams and into our daily life too.
We seem to have the capacity to bring our imagination to life. Many people do this in a negative way without knowing how or why we do so, but we often end up feeling unlucky or blighted in life. We soon start to expect the worst. Some people, on the other hand, just seem to be blessed with the Midas Touch. One day they get an idea, a flash of inspiration, and soon there is a successful new business venture under way, or they seem to be able to find new ways to improve their relationships, bodies or lifestyle when they need to.
Other people seem to be able to just conjure up whatever they want and ‘poof’, as if by magic, it goes from fantasy to a new reality. The question is, Can anyone do it? The message of this book is, yes, absolutely we can. Routinely we all manifest our dreams and hopes as well as, unfortunately, our fears. Most of us don’t know just how we do it. We are truly creative machines, we just have to learn how to create a life more akin to our aspirations. It is definitely easy to create, we do it every day with our choices and will, but it is not always so easy to change the way we create.
This book is about how to bring your true desires, talents, powers and purpose out of your head and into your life and stop the cycle of creating problems, drama, difficulty and illness. It is about understanding what potential you have and how to develop it, recognising and overcoming limitations, fears and recurring obstacles; freeing yourself up to be the best you can. We all have a better self inside. We all have a better life to live, and we all have this potential waiting to be unveiled.
Life can often seem like a scene from a western where the hero is dragged along behind the wild horse through mud and cacti, winding up battered and bruised in a strange place surrounded by a hostile crowd. Other times it feels like smooth sailing, sunny and calm, where the slightest whim is granted and the smell of roses is the order of the day. The skill is in turning low and negative expectations into high and positive ones, problems into solutions, illness into vitality and tragic drama into romantic comedy. The objective of this book is to create a map of all the known lands in the world of human potential and to illuminate a secure path through the minefield of life’s imposed and self-imposed obstacles. It is a path only you can tread but one that you can get help to locate and navigate. There is such a thing as potential, a best possible scenario, and we all have the ability to make the best of what we have been given. Dreams can become reality and we all have the ability to manifest our hearts’ desires. Ordinary people just like you and I do extraordinary things every day, things that they only initially ‘dreamed of’, but eventually lived out.
However possible our goals and dreams and desired changes may be, it doesn’t necessarily mean they appear in front of you immediately with the wave of your magic wand. There are a lot of pieces to this puzzle. Change requires strength. Yes, we need instruction and method but we get nowhere without passion, drive, courage and perseverance. The kind of creativity and change we are talking about, the power to transform a life, a body, an attitude, a future, requires the kind of strength, imagination and application that you may have thought only other people had, but not you. So many of us give up on our goals and dreams and sometimes even the merest hope of positive change because we cannot sustain the focus and confidence we need to make it all happen. It is certainly not the norm to act and think this way but it is becoming more widespread, as people everywhere and from every walk of life are demanding health, happiness, independence and freedom for themselves and their families.
We all have the potential to live healthy and consistently joyous lives. All the resources are there. The only thing stopping us is ourselves; a part conditioned, part self-created programming that determines how we think, what we believe to be true about ourselves and our world, and what to expect from our future. For many of us at the moment, that programming is negative and limiting, but it certainly doesn’t have to be. We think we don’t have the strength but we do. We may not always have had the know-how but, if the desire and the will are there, the way is surely not far behind. For many of us, our story, the one we star in every day, may need a rewrite. Maybe it won’t be a drastic one but, all the same, it begins with an appreciation that we ourselves are the playwrights and that we do indeed have the power, however hidden it might be, to get the job done. But what is that job? What are the changes that need to be made? What are the talents waiting to spring forth? This is all up to you to decide, of course, but this book aims to give you the insight and the strength to make the necessary changes, whatever they may be. You are the one steering the ship, as it were. You have to decide on the direction. Who are you really? What is the best version of you and what are you supposed to be doing with the gifts of body, mind and life that you have been given? For these are gifts, and quite a responsibility.
Each of our lives affects many others around us. When setting the course and as we search our hearts for exactly what is desired, we need to remember what is important. Is the new convertible more important than a healthy body? Is a new career more important than a happy family? Which comes first, love or money? Can we have both? Can we have it all? As the voiceover guy says: “These questions and more will be answered shortly.” But for now, yes, I believe we can have it all. We just need to know how to develop our strengths and powers and then how to create our reality. If we are fit, flexible, focused, free, fun-loving and prepared to take a risk, we will no doubt find what it is that we are looking for.
When do we know that we have it? Ah, that is the real question. Wellbeing, creativity and happiness can be taught but only the owner of the body, mind and life can appreciate and accept it. Only we can know when we are full when that time comes. Begin with an attitude of humility, appreciation, open-mindedness and courage and you are well on your way. This book is just a prop on the stage of this act of your life. It is up to you how the play continues from this moment on. Break a leg!
Chapter One
None of us has all the answers all of the time, especially when it comes to our own life. We all need a little objective guidance from time to time when we want to improve or change something about ourselves and our lives. It is not always so easy to find someone who has the ability to help us change for the better. Sometimes it’s a money issue and sometimes it’s a privacy issue or possibly a lack of motivation. Sometimes we give up trying to make things better and allow our dreams gradually to fade away while we make do with an inferior quality of health and lifestyle. One thing is for sure though, no one is going to do it for us; we have to find the will as well as the way to get ourselves there.
Not everyone would automatically think of a life coach as an option or resource to help one overcome limitations and sticking points and provide the inspiration and guidance that we are talking about. Many people are not fully aware of what life coaching even is or what a life coach can do for them. Granted, each life coach has their own style but generally it is a very modern concept and job description that incorporates many existing and traditional sources of help such as psychology, spiritual guidance, careers counselling, personal training, time management and mentoring. The aim of this particular book is to help you, the reader realise your potential, physically and mentally, and find the greatest success possible, whatever that might be. The idea here, is that when we are organised and focused, free from negativity and hang-ups and living a balanced and healthy life, then we are so much more productive, relaxed, creative and purposeful. So, simply put, life coaching is about empowering people. If your goal is to improve your health, your prospects, your relationships, your image and your life experience, then you have found what you are looking for.
This workbook is your tool, your personal life coach as it were, to help you rediscover the healthiest, most productive, positive and creative you. It is up to you to use it well. Have a look again at the Contents page. It lists the main areas that you will be addressing as you work on improving yourself holistically (in all the ways you need to). This is your guide but you can do it all yourself. It is easier than you think to achieve these things and get closer than you ever thought possible to your true potential. All you need is a map, a tool and some energy. Each person reading this has their own goals in mind and their own problems to overcome. You may be in need of a complete reinvention. You may be trying to get over a major trauma or loss and trying to build up your life again. You may have a chronic health condition that you haven’t been able to overcome. You might just feel as though you are in a rut and that it is time for a shake-up, a change, a lifestyle make-over perhaps. Either way this is a great opportunity to do a little soul searching, get to know yourself better, remind yourself what you are capable of and work on yourself to be the best you can. We all need to do this at times so that we don’t lose track of our goals and dreams and the things that are most important to us.
It is completely natural to want to be better and improve. It is completely natural to strive to progress, improve and adapt. This is how evolution works. We are no different from other creatures in that we must evolve and improve regularly if we are to survive and prosper in an ever-changing world. As nature strives to find the best way so must we. Our best is wrapped up in our potential waiting to be unfurled and expressed but so often our lifestyles become our masters rather than the other way around. It is time to take charge of our lives again. All achievement and potential happiness starts with us; with a desire and a decision. Do you want the best for yourself and those around you or is mere existence and a so-so life good enough for you? This is YOUR LIFE, live it the best way you can.
This book covers a lot of topics so don’t rush through it, take your time. Read a section, think about it and come back to it later. It will sink in better that way. There are sections for guidance and instruction and some that are just intended to inspire you and provoke reflection. Work through the book steadily and fill in the sections that require you to. You will become more aware than ever of your true current situation, how you spend your time, how you think, your beliefs about yourself and the world around you, what you eat, what activities you participate in, generally how you live this life at the moment. All of this determines who you are today and what your quality of life is going to be tomorrow.
Once you have a clear picture of what is really going on now in your body, mind and your life, then you are in a position to make lasting changes. The workbook-like nature of this programme is just how it would be if you had a real life coach working with you. You would be asked to evaluate just how you live your life currently and then you would be given options to improve all important aspects and then methods to apply these changes to your current schedule and routine. So if you want the best results, use this book to its fullest extent. Remember Rome wasn’t built in a day so be patient yet determined. Once you have read and completed all the sections, then it is just a matter of living your life with a little more balance and consideration of what is healthy and good for you.
I am your Pocket Life Coach, your partner to help you use the tools in this book. Remember you are the driving force and it is up to you, as always, to learn what you can and make the necessary changes as best you can. Take it one day and one aspect of your life at a time. Good luck.
Before you can change anything you must be able to understand where you are at the moment. When you overhaul your financial plan you look at exactly what you spend and what you earn. Then you make decisions based on your actual situation compared to your ideal situation. For the best results in any endeavour we always have to find our starting point, our actual position now so that we can plan ahead with confidence. Many problems in life are caused by our reluctance to be realistic and honest with ourselves and to face up to our situations realistically instead of viewing our world in a way that makes us feel better temporarily. This view is often unrealistic and it boils down to a lack of honesty on our part. The famous movie line “You can’t handle the truth,” underlines the fear many of us have about looking closely at what is actually going on. You see we have each developed standards relative to what we believe to be good, fair and correct. When we really start to be honest with ourselves and look at the way we really live and think, so many of the causes of our pain and disappointment show themselves. We spend far too much time papering over the cracks of our reality with what amounts to storytelling and self-delusion. Likewise, sometimes we are over critical of ourselves when, in fact, that is not a fair and true evaluation either. If you are serious about changing your current situation you have to find out what the reality of it is. This true picture may take a while to put together but again, with practice it is something that you can accomplish and with this powerful knowledge you can move forward from a stable starting point.
Once you have established a clear view of your world, you are in a much more powerful position to effect change and recognise problem conditions that may need to be altered. You will also be able to identify those things that you previously thought needed changing which are in fact, perfectly acceptable. It is all about saving you time and energy, being more efficient by making your starting point your ultimate source of power. It is the place to strike from and retreat safely back to, and it is so important to identify it before you make any move to better yourself. There is no point in working towards an ideal situation until you are aware of your current and actual position. Bite the bullet and face facts while being kind to yourself along the way. You will be glad you did.
This is the dictionary definition of the word potential: capable of being but not yet in existence; latent; having possibility, capability or power. Everything created has its own potential, an ideal, a best case scenario, as it were. This book attempts to define what this word means when associated with us, yes, even you. The reason we need this is that, once a definition has been established, then it is just a matter of the application process. Easy right?
We would all love to realise our true potential, get our bodies into the best condition possible, to train and develop our minds into a powerful thinking, problem solving and creative force. We all want to be as happy, fulfilled and free as possible. Yet if it were that easy, then we would all have it wouldn’t we? We know it isn’t easy to achieve our best and this may be due largely to the fact that very few of us know what is our best potential state or what is required to achieve it.
To begin the definition process for human potential, it may be easier to learn from those who have mastered it. Legend tells of a few who have personified perfection and completion in every way. We are inspired by these ‘super humans’ but we don’t always feel as though we have the same capabilities or potential that they had. We need more relevant and up-todate advice on how to make changes and improvements while we live this hectic life of ours. Although legendary characters inspire, we still have to apply their ideals to today’s lifestyles. Our potential hasn’t actually changed but our culture and lifestyle has, and methods and techniques must keep up. It seems a good time to redefine potential and remind ourselves what we are capable of in a world with so much ill health, antisocial behaviour, fear and uncertainty. Time for a new approach perhaps?
