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Beschreibung

Develop your child's talents, energy, inspiration, and motivation

In Unlocking Your Child's Potential: Nurturing Brilliance and Shaping Futures, authors Jan Mühlfeit, a leader, global strategist and coach, and Kateřina Krůtová, an experienced lecturer in the field of education and child development, deliver a startlingly insightful and exciting discussion of how to bring out the best in your children. In the book, you'll learn how to avoid the four most common and basic mistakes made by parents and teachers—including focusing on weaknesses while forgetting strengths, neglecting why children do what they do, controlling time instead of harnessing energy, and focusing on success instead of happiness—and learn to achieve something for yourself and your children.

You'll gain valuable and actionable knowledge you can apply immediately in areas like:

  • Positive psychology and how children's brains actually function
  • How to search for a child's true self, their authenticity, and their exceptional character
  • Strategies for encouraging and harnessing energy, motivation, and inspiration in young children


Perfect for parents, teachers and coaches everywhere, Unlocking Your Child's Potential is also a must-read resource for early childhood educators, social workers who work with young children, and anyone else interested in bettering the lives of the youngest among us.

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Seitenzahl: 373

Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2024

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Unlocking Your Child’s Potential is based on various workshops
organized  by  Jan  and  Kateřina  for  children, students,  and  parents.
I attended one of the workshops with my daughter Ema, and it was an
extremely inspiring experience for both of us. It helped me discover my
daughter’s talents and made me believe that I had the power to help her
get wherever she wants to be. Thank you, Jan and Kateřina!
— Terezie Tománková, TVpresenter
Unlocking Your Child’s Potential is a tremendous help for any parents
who  are  concerned  about  their  child’s  future  in  the  modern  world.
I attended the Parent as a Positive Coach workshop organized by Jan
and Kateřina when I was five months pregnant. I would like to use
the principles they taught me to create the optimal conditions for my
children to realize their potential in the future.
— Denisa Rosolová, former professional
athlete and European champion
Jan and Kateřina have achieved something amazing. The book provides
clear, concise guidelines for helping develop a child’s talent and is a
must-read for any parent. It offers numerous tips and suggestions that
will help both you and your children live a better, fulfilled life.
— Radek Ptáček, clinical psychologist
I am extremely grateful that Jan and Kateřina joined forces to create
this extremely helpful manual for parents. When you want to learn to
cook, you buy a cookbook; when you want to learn to discover the best
in your children and help them develop it, this is just the book for you.
It teaches you that you should always try to do your best, but also that
it’s not the end of the world to make a mistake – every mistake is a val-
uable lesson. Both adults and children need someone who understands
them and steers them in the right direction. I would like to thank Jan
and Kateřina for sharing their experience with us. They set a path that
everyone should follow.
— Veronika Kašáková, model and charitable foundation founder
There are myriad books on children and parenting, but the one you’re
reading has come just at the right time. We live in an age of great wealth
and sometimes almost excessive hedonism, but also in an age that
offers tremendous potential to those who know how to use it to grow
and develop. And using it well is the key. We live in the golden age of
humankind, trying to colonize space and discover distant galaxies, but
more often than not, we don’t really know ourselves. We are not aware
of our own potential, skills, and abilities. This is where Jan and Kateřina
come in, with their wealth of experience based on many years of col-
laboration. I hope the book will become an inspiration not only for par-
ents and their children but for anyone who’s interested in improving and
understanding themselves.
— Marian Jelínek, former personal trainer
to Jaromír Jágr and currently a personal trainer
to Karolína Plíšková and other professional athletes
UNLOCKING
YOUR CHILD’S
POTENTIAL
UNLOCKING YOUR
CHILD’S POTENTIAL:
NURTURING BRILLIANCE&
SHAPING FUTURES
JAN MÜHLFEIT& KATEŘINA KRŮTOVÁ
This edition first published 2024
© 2024 by Jan Mühlfeit and Kateřina Krůtová
Edition History
© 2022 by Jan Mühlfeit and Kateřina Krůtová
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from this title is available at http://www.wiley.com/go/permissions.
The right of Jan Mühlfeit and Kateřina Krůtová to be identified as the authors of this work has
been asserted in accordance with law.
Registered Office(s)
John Wiley & Sons Ltd, The Atrium, Southern Gate, Chichester, West Sussex, PO19 8SQ, UK
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John Wiley & Sons, Inc. is not associated with any product or vendor mentioned in this book.
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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is Available:
ISBN: 9781394239788 (Paperback)
ISBN: 9781394239801 (epdf)
ISBN: 9781394239795 (epub)
Cover Design: Wiley
Cover Image: © Dedraw Studio/Shutterstock; © TinyDoz/Shutterstock
TABLE OFCONTENTS
0.INTRODUCTION2
PART1:A CHILD’S BRAIN IN THEEXPONENTIALAGE
1.THE POWEROF BRAIN SYNAPSES12
2.SCHOOLVS. INNOVATION40
3.TECHNOLOGY ANDTHE FAST-CHANGINGWORLD56
PART2:FROM SELF-AWARENESS TO FLOW
4.SELF-AWARENESS70
5.SELF-CONFIDENCE108
6.SELF-WORTH134
7.SELF-EXPRESSION160
8.PARENTASA POSITIVE COACH202
+ CONCLUSION226
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS234
PART3:BONUS INTERVIEWS
CYRILHÖSCHL, PSYCHIATRIST238
JAROSLAV SVĚCENÝ, VIRTUOSO VIOLINIST250
DAGMARSVOBODOVÁ,MOTHER OFTHREE SONS264
INDEX270
UNLOCKING
YOUR CHILD’S
POTENTIAL
0
0
INTRODUCTION
3
WHO WEARE
Jan Mühlfeit and Kateřina Novotna organize workshops and lectures
in both the Czech Republic and Slovakia, helping parents, students,
and children unlock their human potential.
Jan:Some 20 years ago, while I was still working for Microsoft, I first
developed the concept of positive leadership. It’s not about seeing every-
one in a positive light – that would be impossible. Positive leadership
means discovering a person’s best qualities. Only then can you build
teams where the whole is much more than the sum of its parts. It’s a
method suitable not only for corporate managers but also, for example,
for sports coaches who want to create the world’s best athletic teams.
It allows you to mesh different personalities where one’s strength can
compensate for another’s weakness. It’s the combination of individual
strengths, with a dash of inspiration, that makes a winning team – be it
in sports, business, or art.
Kateřina:I’ve been working with children for over ten years. I find it
incredibly fulfilling. A few years back, Jan and I had a sort of brainstorm-
ing session. In the end, we decided it would be great if we could join our
two worlds and combine his long experience in personal development
and positive leadership with my own focus on children, parents, and
alternative methods of education. I believe through our workshops, lec-
tures, and videos, as well as this book, we can share valuable informa-
tion and experience with parents, children, and students, helping them
follow their dreams and find an occupation they will enjoy and shine in.
After all, we have done the same thing.
Since we share the same goals, we have decided to write this book as
a team and speak in plural for most of the time; sometimes, though,
we might like to share some individual experiences, stories, or ideas,
so we will add some comments as either Jan or Kateřina. As a bonus,
we have added excerpts from an interview with our good friend and
4
INTRODUCTION
prominent Czech  psychiatrist Cyril  Höschl. (The  complete interview
with Cyril, as well as bonus interviews with Jaroslav Svěcený and Dag-
mar Svobodová, can be found at the end of the book).
WHYWE WROTE
THIS BOOK
So far, about 1,400 children and 1,500 parents have attended our work-
shops,Unlocking a Child’s / Student’s Potential and Parent as a Positive
Coach. We’ve made a very important observation: if parents understand
themselves, they have a much better chance of understanding their
children. You can’t give what you don’t have, as the old saying goes.
Self-awareness gives parents the right tools to work with their child.
Few parents can claim to truly know themselves. Throughout our stud-
ies and careers, we learn to understand what’s around us, not what’s
inside us. Many people will never get to explore their inner mental land-
scape and discover their strong points – things they are good at. They
often end up doing a job they don’t truly enjoy, and once they have chil-
dren, they make them study things they have no aptitude for or that
they don’t really like, vicariously fulfilling their own ambitions through
their offspring.
“People who study (insert a prestigious, lucrative field) can make good
money,” parents often argue, and send their children to study just such
a subject. They might indeed end up making good money – but they
will probably not be particularly happy. Once you manage to meet your
5
basic needs, achieving true happiness requires a lot more than wealth
(which you might already know, considering you are reading this book).
That’s why there are so many people in this world who are rich, success-
ful – and very unhappy. Their only goal is to amass as great a fortune as
possible, without having any true appreciation for their own work.
Our goal is to help both parents and children to discover their hidden
talents, in order to live a better, fuller life and achieve contentment,
success, and happiness. This is the purpose of both our workshops
and this book, which discusses the concepts we teach in much greater
detail. We would like this book to serve as a guide for parents who want
more – both for their children and themselves.
OUR IDEASAND
APPROACH –AN OUTLINE
Parents wield an enormous influence over their children. Often, how-
ever, they don’t realize how big that influence is, or they will not admit it
to themselves. The way parents behave, the way they treat others, the
way they talk about themselves and other people, their attitude toward
work and leisure, their way of solving conflicts – in other words, virtually
everything that parents do forms patterns that children soak up and
model their own behavior on. Some of these patterns may not have an
immediate effect but they imprint themselves on the child’s subcon-
scious. Years later, when the child has grown up, they may re-emerge
and shape their personality and behavior.
6
INTRODUCTION
At our workshops, we ask the parents the following questions:
How did you feel about your own growth and development
when you were little, and how would you like to bring up
your own children?
Most parents (about 90 percent) say that they don’t want to repeat their
parents’ mistakes. They had decided, very early on, that they would
never do such things to their children – and then they have children of
their own, and they treat them exactly as their parents treated them.
They are well aware that they have internalized some of the patterns
of their childhood, but they have no idea how to break free from them.
Can you identify with this? You probably can. Don’t worry – your brain
has this amazing ability to reprogram itself. It’s called neuroplasticity,
and you will learn more about it in Chapter 1.
It’s important to realize that you’re doing something you
don’t want to do; only then can you change it.
PATIENCE ISAN IMPORTANT PARTOF PARENTING
Most parents love their children unconditionally. Many are convinced
that smoothing their children’s path in life – explaining everything, buy-
ing them whatever they want, helping them out constantly – will make
their children happier. More often than not, it doesn’t work. Instead, try
to be patient when your child is not as quick at mastering a task as their
peers. Try not to step in when it takes them more time to learn things
than you would have expected or if they don’t master them right away.
Be patient and support your children in learning things on their own.
In doing so, you will help them far more than by doing everything for
them. Overcoming obstacles builds up mental resilience – an ability to
perform tasks even under stressful conditions. You won’t learn anything
if you stay in your comfort zone.
7
8
INTRODUCTION
FOCUS ON DEVELOPINGYOUR CHILD’S ABILITIES,
NOTJUST ELIMINATING WEAKNESSES
It’s  important  to  help  children discover  their  various  talents  and
learn to develop them. Many parents tend to focus on their child’s
weak points and potential causes  of failure. This leads to estab-
lishing a sort of arbitrary average which they want their children to
aspire to, believing that if only they could eliminate their weak points,
they would become the best. It’s much better to focus on the exact
opposite: instead of improving weaknesses, learn to help your child
develop what they are actually good at.
OVERCOMINGFEAR IS ESSENTIAL
FOR ACHIEVING SUCCESS
The human brain is programmed to prevent failure, not to enable
success. Overcoming this basic programming requires training.
Your brain primarily focuses on your fears. That’s why many people
spend their lives being afraid – for themselves and their own future,
and later for their own children. Parents then pass on their own fears
to their offspring.
At our workshops, we teach children that the part of the human brain
known as the amygdala is like a MONKEY, constantly jumping from
one subject to another and evaluating possible causes of failure. By
doing this, it incites our fear. We teach children that it’s actually possible
to tame the Monkey, and even put it to sleep. Any activity that you are
good at and that you enjoy so much that you lose sense of time while
doing it can calm down your inner Monkey. The total immersion in an
activity, which leaves no room for fear and concerns, is also known as
the flow state. (More about this in Chapter 1.)
The Monkey will accompany us throughout this book. Together, we will
learn how to outsmart the Monkey, how to nourish it, and how to help
9
children to become aware of their inner Monkey and get to know them-
selves better.
Join us! Stop living as a weak imitation and become
an original instead!
This is not a perfect parent’s handbook, but rather a friendly guide for
anyone who would like to try out new methods of achieving better
self-awareness and learn to communicate with their own children, help-
ing them to lead a better, happier, more successful life.
Part 1:
1: The power of brain synapses
2: School vs. Innovation
3: Technology and the fast-changing world
A CHILD’S
BRAININTHE
EXPONENTIALAGE
1
THE POWER
OFBRAIN
SYNAPSES
13
Every child is born with approximately 100 billion brain cells, called neu-
rons.The neurons start interconnecting as early as during gestation.
The links between neurons are known as synapses. Neurons intercon-
nect depending on what the child sees, hears, and feels. The environ-
ment the child grows up in, the stimuli they receive, and what they play
with are all crucial factors for forming brain synapses.
Bruce Lipton, prominent American developmental biologist and author
of the book The Biology of Belief, claims that between the third trimes-
ter of gestation and seven years of age, a child lives in a kind of trance
state, recording everything around them into their brain. Obviously, the
better the software the child manages to “download” into their subcon-
scious, the easier it will be for their personality to develop in a positive
way in the future.
I’m sure you remember seeing your child so immersed in playing that
they don’t even hear you call them. How is that possible? How does a
child become so absorbed in building with LEGO
®
, drawing, or putting
together a jigsaw puzzle that they don’t realize they’re hungry or uncom-
fortable, or that someone is trying to talk to them? How come, when-
ever we become engrossed in an activity that we like and that we’re
good at, we don’t take notice of time or anything going on around us?
How can we focus on something to the point of not feeling thirsty or the
need to use the bathroom?
In moments like this, we get into what is known as flow– a state of
creative concentration which causes complete immersion in a game or
activity. The condition was first described by Hungarian-American psy-
chologist Mihalyi Csikszentmihalyi. In the 1980s and 1990s, Csikszent-
mihalyi observed various artists at work and noticed they sometimes
became so absorbed with their activity that they forgot to eat, drink, or
even sleep. Children have a natural ability to identify the activities that
they have an aptitude for and prefer those activities to any others.They
will not play with toys they don’t like. Once a child becomes immersed in
an activity they enjoy, they feel so energized that they quickly reach this
flow state. Once in flow, they can’t hear their parents calling, and even a
toilet-trained child may sometimes wet themselves.
14
THE POWER OF BRAIN SYNAPSES
The concept of flow has been adopted by the field of positive psychol-
ogy, and we will return to it many times throughout this book. It’s very
important to understand exactly how flow works and how to induce
it consciously to achieve maximum motivation and produce the best
possible results.
When we work in flow state, “work stops being work and turns into an
experience, a supreme expression of our inner verve. (…) Furthermore,
we are able to ignore all those annoying distractions that try to throw us
off the ideal path toward our goal.”
[1]
We experience flow three times as often while working than during
leisure time. This refutes the common concept of work as a neces-
sary evil that allows us to make money and that we can only expe-
rience true happiness in our free moments. You cannot become
creatively absorbed while watching TV or lying on a beach. Only when
you engage in a task for which you have the required talent and skills,
which is both a challenge and a productive use of your time, can you
immerse yourself fully. Such tasks increase your self-confidence and
your sense of happiness.
In flow state, two processes occur in your brain. The part of your brain
known as the frontal cortex contains two important sensors:
●Time perception sensor– also known as our“inner Watch.” Under
usual circumstances, it perceives the passing of time very meticu-
lously, but it shuts down when you reach flow state. A child has
no sense of time passing, and they don’t even hear their parents
calling them.
For example, a child has been playing in the playground for over an
hour. They’re surprised and sad when their mother says it’s time to go
home. They feel like they couldn’t have been playing for more than
five minutes and don’t want to go home just yet.
15
●The amygdalais a part of the brain associated with emotions. We’ve
decided to call it “the Monkey.” One of its tasks is to be on constant
alert for any potential danger. The Monkey is one of the oldest parts
of the human brain and performs a primary role in ensuring our sur-
vival. (In the past, it warned people against wild animals; today, it
often acts up for no reason at all.) It is constantly active, jumping
from one thing to another like a monkey between branches. However,
once we reach flow state, it falls asleep and lets us explore and dis-
cover the world undisturbed.
Reading this book, you will get to know the Monkey much better. In
Chapter 7, you will learn how to keep the Monkey happy and let both
you and your child work and play in peace.
A child is building a complicated LEGO® structure, immersed in flow.
They utilize their skills and abilities to the maximum to master this
complex task. They sense nothing but the present moment; both the
Watch and the Monkey are turned off. The child’s parent comes by
and looks at what the child has built. “I could never build anything
that complex,” they might think. “I’ve never even tried.” The child has
no such thoughts; they don’t bother thinking about things they’ve
built in the past or wonder whether the new project will work. They’re
only focused on placing the next brick just right. Their neurons form
synapses with other neurons, ready and waiting to connect. This is
how a child learns, while the parent concludes that, since they’ve
never managed to build anything this complicated, they could proba-
bly never do it. Their Watch is running; their Monkey is jumping from
branch to branch.
This is how everyone’s brain works, whether you are an artist or athlete,
adult or child.
16
THE POWER OF BRAIN SYNAPSES
Jan: Olympic champion David Svoboda once told me at a coaching ses-
sion that he had no memory of the final moments of his competition
at the London Olympics. Only as he stood on the highest podium and
listened to the national anthem did he realize he had actually won.
There is one thing that is always with us in the “here and now,” no matter
what. It ensures our survival, and if it disappeared from the here and
now, we would be dead: our breath. Breathing always happens in the
present moment, and we can utilize it to calm down our inner Monkey.
The inhale-exhale cycle takes approximately four seconds.Try it now.
Breathe in and out.
And now, ask yourself the following question, and answer truthfully.
What were you thinking during that inhale-exhale moment?
The right answer is, of course, “Nothing.”
17
When we perform a certain activity often enough, the synapses in our
brain related to this particular activity become very strong, and a kind
of sheath is formed around them, made of a substance called myelin.
This process, known as myelination, allows nerve impulses to move
far more quickly across the synapses and turns the activity at hand
into a habit.
[2]
It becomes so ingrained and automated that you no
longer have to think about it and can perform it even under difficult,
stressful conditions. You work on autopilot, and your Monkey stays
calm and dormant.
Some artistsand athletes claim that it takes 10,000 hours of practice to
become a master in their field.
Think about a child learning to play ice hockey. When they first put
on the skates, they’re just happy if they can stay upright. As they
learn to skate, they focus on moving their feet and coordinating their
movements on  the ice.  With practice,  they get  better and  better.
Once they’re good enough to get a hockey stick, they no longer need
to think about skating at all. Moving across the ice has become an
ingrained, automated activity.
Once you turn an activity into an ingrained habit, you will be able to get
in flow and perform even difficult, stressful tasks.
Imagine a child is working on his math test, immersed in a flow state.
Then the teacher announces there are only ten minutes left to complete
the test. At this point, there are two ways the child can react:
●They have enough practice doing their sums that the method has
become ingrained (myelination has occurred). “I’ve already solved
lots of such problems,” they think. “Surely I can do two more in the
time I have left.” And they keep on working.
●The child becomes nervous and is no longer able to return to flow.
The teacher’s words throw them off. “Well, I’ve done some of the
18
THE POWER OF BRAIN SYNAPSES
problems,” they think, and keep on working, yet all the while being
afraid they’ve made some mistakes, focusing excessively on not
making any more. They focus their thoughts on the time they have
left, afraid of failure.
This is how both adults and children react to various situations.
If a child has enough practice solving math problems, they are able
to get into a flow state, even during a test, and stay in it until the
last moment.
BRAINWAVES
Our brain is capable of operating on five brainwave frequencies. Each
brainwave frequency correlates with a different state of consciousness.
Just like sound frequencies, brainwave speed is measured in Hertz (Hz).
A child’s brain operates on low brainwave frequencies – alpha and
theta – which allows children to enter flow state very often. That’s why
children are so creative and imaginative.
BRAINWAVES
delta
theta
alpha
beta
gamma
FREQUENCY
0.5–4 Hz
4–8 Hz
8–12 Hz
12–35 Hz
over 35 Hz
ADULT PERSON’SSTATE
OF CONSCIOUSNESS
deep sleep / unconsciousness
light dream state /
daydreaming / imagination
relaxed state of consciousness
alert and focused state
peak concentration
and performance
19
Let’s look at the theta brainwaves (4–8 Hz).The theta brain state is
commonly associated with meditation or certain spiritual experiences.
It is the state you experience just before drifting off to sleep, when
various thoughts, images, and visions float across your mind. It is the
dreamlike state when you are only half-awake but not yet in deep sleep.
Theta brainwaves sometimes allow you to come up with great ideas or
solutions to problems you haven’t been able to find during the day. The
theta brain state also occurs in REM sleep when you are dreaming.
Suggestion:Whenever you are simply resting or falling asleep,
you may experience visions or come up with interesting ideas.
Trytorouseyourself and write them down right away. Once you
fall into a deeper sleep, you will have a hard time remembering
them in the morning.
Kateřina:When I lie in bed, just before I fall asleep, my body is com-
pletely relaxed, and thoughts just float around my head. That’s when I
tend to come up with the most interesting ideas. I try to make a quick
note on my cell phone; if I forget to do that and fall asleep instead, I
usually forget about them.
The brains of preschoolers are in the theta state most of the time;
that’s why small children can be so creative and tend to become
engrossed in a world of their own.They can easily imagine their toys
coming alive. Toy animals can become real; a few twigs, pieces of
bark, and moss can turn into a magical village where many fascinat-
ing stories can play out.
Suggestion:Tryto recallsuch situations from your own child-
hood.Do you still remember what it waslike, roaming around
in a world ofyourown, where anything was possible? Can you
recall the feeling ofbeing so lostinyour fantasies that you
20
THE POWER OF BRAIN SYNAPSES
couldn’t even hear your parents calling, forgot to turn up for lunch,
orgot unbelievably dirty while hiding in the shrubbery?
Memories like that are bound to put a smile on your face. Perhaps you
will now realize that your children are not being naughty when they don’t
seem to listen to a word you say. Sometimes they become lost in their
game at the most inconvenient moment. You are in a hurry, you don’t
want them to get dirty, or you are tired of repeating everything for the nth
time. Remembering what you were like at their age may help you under-
stand your child better and prevent you from getting needlessly angry.
Kateřina:Sometimes, children can be too creative for their own good.
I’m sure my mother vividly remembers the day I used wax crayons to
draw on the wall, painted a picture above my bed using an apple cut in
half, and used child safety scissors to cut leaves from all the plants I
could reach. Her reaction was as far from the sandwich feedback (dis-
cussed in Chapter 5) as possible. However, not even her punishment
could curb my boundless creativity. As parents, you don’t have to feel
guilty if you sometimes lose your temper. Children are quite resilient.
A preschooler’s mind is like a sponge: it absorbs everything it sees,
hears, and senses and stores it in the subconscious. Most brain syn-
apses are formed at preschool age: 50 percent form before the age of
five, and by age seven your brain will have formed 75 percent of all the
synapses it is capable of creating. They are all required for mastering
the basic skills and abilities: learning to talk, read, write, and make sense
of the world. During adolescence, some of the unused synapses start
to disappear.
WINDOWSOF OPPORTUNITY
Windows of Opportunity are periods in a child’s development during
which they are able to master certain skills and concepts quickly and
easily. Most Windows of Opportunity for specific areas of development
occur until the age of six to seven.
21
If you want your child to speak a foreign language, it’s best to start dur-
ing the period when children are hard-wired for mastering speech and
vocabulary, which is from birth until approximately six years of age.
Most Windows of Opportunity come in preschool age; however, don’t
feel guilty for not exploring some of them fully. It doesn’t mean that your
child will never be able to master that specific skill, only that it will take
a little more time or effort later on.
During each Window of Opportunity, it’s important for parents to pro-
vide their child with as many stimuli and experiences as possible. Chil-
dren also quickly absorb behavioral patterns they encounter in their
own family, among their friends, or in nursery school.
Parents often argue or discuss “adult” problems in front of their children,
believing that they are too small to understand what’s going on. In fact,
children take notice of everything happening around them and store
it in their subconscious mind. Many years later, when they encounter
similar situations, those long-stored patterns may come to light. Behav-
ioral patterns often emerge only when a child grows up and starts a
relationship or family.
It’s quite normal for parents to lose their temper from time to time. We
all make mistakes. It’s important, however, to teach children that mak-
ing mistakes is natural and that any problems can be resolved.
If you make a mistake, you can say: “I’m sorry I lost my temper. This is
not how I wanted to behave.” If your child behaves inappropriately, you
can say: “I don’t like it when you act this way. Let’s talk about it.”
Suggestion:As a parent, it’s important to behonest. Don’t
pretend you can handle everything. If youlet others help out,
you’re teaching your child an important lesson: you’re showing
them that you are not perfect and that you also need help from
time to time. Show your child that different people have different
talents and that it’s great towork asa team where everyone has
22
THE POWER OF BRAIN SYNAPSES
somethingto contribute. Your child will absorb these patterns
and learn to function withina family.
You don’t need to feel guilty about having neglected an important
aspect of your child’s development. Nobody is perfect. Instead, try to
realize where you went wrong and consciously improve your attitude
whenever a similar situation occurs. In doing so, you will be giving your
child plenty of material to store in their subconscious.
There is usually more than one way to handle a certain problem. Try
to realize that you can do things differently than you are used to doing
them, and you don’t have to follow your parents’ example. Don’t be
afraid to try your own way.
HELPING YOUR CHILD
BUILD BRAINSYNAPSES
There are various ways you can help your child create brain synapses.
They include various simple or complex memory games, rhythmic
exercises (clapping out a beat, making sounds using your own body),
and activities stimulating motor development (turning around, walk-
ing along a line, playing with modeling clay, stringing beads). You have
most likely tried out many such activities with your child. Children see
them as a fun game, but, at the same time, they’re helping your child
develop and improve.
23
Here are some simple exercises you can try with your child to develop
specific parts of their brain.
SPATIALPERCEPTION
Twirling around helps children develop spatial perception. You can start
with simple exercises as early as age three. First make the child twirl
following one hand, then the other, or following various pictures. Walk-
ing along a line is another good exercise to improve spatial perception.
Stretch a length of string or a jump rope on the floor and let the child
walk on it. This is a very good balance exercise. Both exercises help the
child develop a sense of space – even when they fall down.
Brain Gym
®
is a method using various exercises to improve hand,
foot, and eye coordination, as well as the mind, which controls
our movement.
[3]
EXERCISE:BRAIN GYM
®
Here are some simple exercises both you and your children
can try:
●Draw number eights with your finger or your entire arm (you
can try moving your other hand in the opposite direction).
●Use your finger to draw various figures in the air (letters,
simple images).
●Take slow, long sips of water, and try to sense the water
running through your body.
●Alternate regular and irregular breathing, and try to feel the
changes, or try belly breathing.
24
THE POWER OF BRAIN SYNAPSES
●Try to conduct a verbal and non-verbal activity simulta-
neously: do one of the previous exercises while talking,
or try to draw or write while talking, in order to improve
your attention.
ENGAGINGTHE SENSES
Children retain new things much better if learning them engages all
their senses. This approach is applied in the Montessori Method of
Education (see Chapter 2). Its founder, Maria Montessori, followed the
principle of “learning by doing,” somewhat similar to the teachings of
Czech theologian and educator John Amos Comenius.
Whenever possible, children should learn by touching, feeling, hearing,
or seeing things in their natural environment. This is especially benefi-
cial for building new brain synapses.
EXERCISE:RECOGNIZING FLAGS
Teaching your child  to  recognize national  flags can  involve
a number of  small visual activities: learning and identifying
colors, describing various symbols and ornaments, and so on.
You can also talk about the different countries the flags belong
to: what kind of people live there, what they like to eat... Per-
haps you could even try making some of their national dishes!
You can play the countries’ national anthems or folk songs and
learn a few phrases in their language. This will help your child
engage as many senses as possible, and it supports the devel-
opment of associative thinking. This is especially important
during preschool age when synapse building is at its peak.
Kateřina:When I used to babysit children, I always tried to spend as
much time outside with them as I could. One of our favorite games was
“potion making.” We picked various leaves, flowers, and plants, sniffed
25
everything, and then mixed it with dirt, pebbles, or even cooking ingre-
dients (which we could actually taste). Then we mixed it all with water.
Every potion was unique, and we would try to make up interesting names
for them. Children tend to enjoy playing with water, and simple activities
like this one can involve all their senses: touch, smell, taste, sight, and
hearing. Children can also improve their imagination by making up vari-
ous stories about the potions and their magical effects.
CONCENTRATIONANDFOCUS
In a world full of modern technologies, it’s hard to maintain our concen-
tration and focus on a single thing. Developing concentration in chil-
dren is even harder. PlayWisely
®
is a developmental play system which
supports a child’s natural learning and movement ability, engaging all
the senses and improving concentration. It is a set of fun activities for
both children and parents. PlayWisely
®
is a comprehensive, scientifi-
cally proven method of learning by play, which uses each child’s natural
ability to learn and move, from birth to preschool age.
PlayWisely
®
was founded by Patty Hannan, former American gymnast
and neuroscience specialist.The system uses sensory  activities,
which help develop a child’s concentration, memory, and language
skills, and motor exercises, which improve a child’s mobility, agility,
and motor skills.
PlayWisely
®
uses a set of special flashcards that show various images,
words, numbers, colors, and objects of different sizes and shapes. Used
jointly with the directional orientation method, the flashcards offer a
unique set of activities that allow children to experience the fun of mov-
ing, learning, and discovering. A typical PlayWisely
®
class lasts 30–45
minutes, depending on the child’s age, and is divided into several activ-
ity blocks. Children start playing with flashcards, followed by mobility
exercises, and ending with another set of flashcards.
[4]
26
THE POWER OF BRAIN SYNAPSES
EXERCISES BASED ON THE PLAYWISELY
®
METHOD
You can either buy the original PlayWisely
®
flashcards or create
a set of your own.
Sit directly facing your child and show them the flashcards in
quick succession.The cards should have a simple image – an
apple, for example – but the apple’s shape, size, and position
should change on each card. It can be on the top or bottom, left
or right, hidden behind something, be smaller or bigger, have
a different color, and so on. Show card after card to your child
and add a quick comment on each one (“apple on top, apple
on the bottom, apple behind a tree, green apple, red apple...”).
Older children can describe the cards themselves as the parent
flashes them.
PlayWisely
®
is offered by licensed centers and in some nursery schools
and kindergartens. To better understand the PlayWisely
®
method, you
can watch various videos on YouTube showing the flashcard system
and other exercises.
ASSOCIATIVE THINKING
Most standard schools are not particularly big on developing associa-
tive thinking. Subjects are taught separately – a math lesson is followed
by a lesson devoted exclusively to reading or writing. This method
does not support learning through associations, in which a child puts
together information based on their connection to real life.
27
EXERCISE:MEMORYTRAINING
As a memory  training  exercise, learn  various synonyms  for
any new words you pick up in either a foreign language or your
native language (for example, for “beautiful” you could also
learn “nice,” “pretty,” etc.), or associate a particular thing with
that  word (story,  experience, emotion;  if we use  “beautiful”
again, imagine something you consider beautiful). When you’re
performing  under pressure  and can’t  recall a  certain  word,
knowing three synonyms for that word, or remembering a place
or emotion connected with it, will make recalling the word and
its context much easier. If you only memorize the word itself,
you might not be able to remember it under stress at all.
EXERCISE:ENIGMATIC RIDDLES
Enigmatic riddles are logical puzzles hidden in a story.They improve
children’s focus and attention  span (by having to understand the
instructions and reading the story), as well as creativity and asso-
ciative thinking. Based on the information provided within a story,
a child has to make the right connections in their brain and find a
logical solution. Such riddles may seem difficult at first sight
(number sequences especially); however, the harder the problem, the
more overjoyed your child will be once they solve it.
Even a seemingly unsolvable riddle looks easy once someone gives
you a hint or tells you the solution. “How could I have not seen it?”
you think.
Story for small children:It’s a beautiful spring day. Grandma has
taken her grandchildren for a walk in the woods around her little cot-
tage. They went around a rotten tree stump, stumbled over a hedge-