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- Herausgeber: John Wiley & Sons
- Kategorie: Fachliteratur
- Sprache: Englisch
Learn the secrets to self-awareness, life-changing growth and happy, high-performing teams--from the bestselling author of The Mindful Leader Great leaders and teams don't know everything, and they don't get it right every time. What sets them apart is their commitment to continual learning and vertical growth. Vertical growth is about cultivating the self-awareness to see our self-defeating thoughts, assumptions and behaviours, and then consciously creating new behaviours that are aligned with our best intentions and aspirations. By embracing the deliberate practices and processes for vertical growth laid out in this book, you'll not only radically improve your leadership and personal wellbeing--you'll also foster the highest levels of trust, psychological safety, motivation, and creativity in the teams and groups you work with. You'll to discover how to: * Identify when, where and how to develop new leadership behaviours to get better results * Regulate your emotional responses in real time and handle the most difficult challenges with balance, wisdom and accountability * Cultivate practices for self-awareness that foster lifelong internal growth and personal happiness * Uncover and change the limiting assumptions and beliefs that keep you, your team and organisation locked in unproductive habits and behaviours * Create practices and rituals that enable the highest levels of psychological safety, innovation and growth Filled with fascinating real-life case studies as well as practical tools and strategies, this is your handbook for mastering vertical growth in yourself, your team and your organisation.
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Seitenzahl: 344
Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2022
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Table of Contents
Cover
Title Page
Copyright
Free bonus resources
Author’s note
INTRODUCTION: The vertical growth imperative
Horizontal skills and knowledge versus vertical growth
Vertical growth within organisations
Vertical growth cuts through image management
Why self-awareness is critical
Becoming deliberately developmental
Cultivating inner psychological safety
Research on vertical growth and mindful leadership
PART I: Developing a vertical growth mindset
1 The Mindful Leader Matrix
How to use the matrix
Fast brain, slow brain
2 Why leaders struggle with walking their talk
Stages of human development
A self-examined life requires courage, but it's worth it
Leadership and the self-examining mind
3 How values help us grow
Values to increase engagement and commitment
Quadrant 1: growth values
The most important leadership values
Honesty as a foundational value to a growth mindset
4 Choose your growth values
Find your growth edge
Places to explore growth values
Results, goals and strategies versus values
Statement of aspiration
5 Commit to action
Four steps for taking conscious, committed action
Using the Mindful Leader Matrix
PART II: Developing self-awareness and resolving the shadow
6 The role of mindfulness in personal growth
The research on mindfulness
Two types of mindfulness training
Mindfulness and the Mindful Leader Matrix
Mindfulness cultivates distress tolerance
7 How to practise self-awareness
The four foundations of mindfulness
The four foundations in practice
Mindfulness and subject–object theory
8 Overcome numbness and denial
To see our shadow, we must first overcome numbness and denial
How the inner judge triggers numbness
Self-compassion creates inner psychological safety
Use the matrix to break the pattern of numbness
9 See and resolve the shadow
Uncovering the shadow
Using the Mindful Leader Matrix to see and resolve the shadow in quadrants 3 and 4
Discover your unconscious assumptions
Find the fears, attachments and assumptions causing your stress
Two more exploration questions on attachment
Completing the left side of the matrix
Using the matrix in your personal life
Expect a messy process
PART III: Vertical growth in teams and organisations
10 Setting and living team and organisational values
Using the Mindful Leader Matrix within teams and organisations
Using the matrix to set team or organisational values
Translate your values into behavioural commitments
Owning your organisational shadow
11 Creating a container of team psychological safety
How team psychological safety impacts the left side of the matrix
Four key elements of psychological safety
12 Eliminating team triangulation
The three roles of triangulation
How to stop triangulation
The cost of triangulation
13 Keep the team on track with 200 per cent accountability
Accountability starts with ourselves
A simple question that helps you take personal accountability
Two sides of accountability
200 per cent accountability in action
Making mindful agreements
Constructive feedback creates psychological safety
14 Giving and receiving conscious feedback
Why giving feedback is so difficult
How to give conscious, compassionate feedback
How to receive feedback with a growth mindset
Defensiveness destroys trust and credibility
Cultivate distress tolerance to receive feedback
Use curiosity to understand feedback
15 Personal transformation and the hero's journey
The hero's journey in adult development
Be kind to yourself on the journey
Be true to yourself
The Mindful Leader: Vertical Growth Resources
Sources
Index
End User License Agreement
List of Tables
Chapter 3
Table 3.1: characteristics of admired leaders
Chapter 5
Table 5.1: Do we trust our leaders?
Chapter 8
Table 8.1: common fight, flight or freeze behaviours
List of Illustrations
Introduction
Figure I.1: vertical versus horizontal development
Chapter 1
Figure 1.1: the Mindful Leader Matrix
Figure 1.2: what keeps us away from our values and aspirations
Figure 1.3: Mindful Leader Matrix example
Chapter 2
Figure 2.1: adult development simplified
Chapter 3
Figure 3.1: impact of values clarity on commitment
Figure 3.2: growth values (quadrant 1)
Figure 3.3: honest feedback
Chapter 5
Figure 5.1: the Committed Action quadrant
Figure 5.2: sample matrix (right side completed)
Figure 5.3: another sample matrix (right side completed)
Chapter 6
Figure 6.1: applying mindfulness to the matrix
Chapter 7
Figure 7.1: the second foundation of self-awareness
Chapter 8
Figure 8.1: the Mindful Leader Matrix
Chapter 9
Figure 9.1: using the matrix to explore the shadow
Figure 9.2: why we engage in quadrant 3 behaviours and resist quadrants 1 an...
Figure 9.3: completed matrix example
Figure 9.4: another completed example
Figure 9.5: personal example #1
Figure 9.6: personal example #2
Chapter 10
Figure 10.1: the Mindful Leader Matrix for personal use
Figure 10.2: the team/organisational values matrix
Figure 10.3: setting organisational growth values
Figure 10.4: aligning behaviour with organisational values
Figure 10.5: organisational shadow
Chapter 11
Figure 11.1: how the organisational shadow impacts values
Figure 11.2: psychological safety and performance standards
Chapter 12
Figure 12.1: a typical triangulation scenario
Chapter 14
Figure 14.1: feedback and leadership effectiveness
Chapter 15
Figure 15.1: the hero's journey
Figure 15.2: vertical growth on the hero's journey
Guide
Cover
Title Page
Copyright
Free bonus resources
Author’s note
Introduction: The vertical growth imperative
Table of Contents
Begin Reading
The Mindful Leader: Vertical Growth Resources
Sources
Index
End User License Agreement
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‘Vertical Growth lays out a clear process for helping leaders really grow as human beings. It is a must-read for any leader interested in making the world a better place, and who understands that self-awareness is now even more critical in our fragile workplaces.’
Paul Hutton, Vice President, APAC, Hilton
‘This is essential reading for any leader who wants to get the very best out of themselves, their teams and their organisation. The challenge to deeply understand what drives each of us as leaders, and to honestly challenge our own behaviours and the impact on the team and the organisation, is both unique and inspiring.’
Michael Wright, Executive Chairman & CEO, Thiess
‘This book clearly shows how self-awareness enables leaders to grow and make an even greater impact for and with their people. A wonderful read, inspiring, practical and insightful.’
Jerh Collins, Chief Culture Officer, Novartis
‘Michael Bunting's approach makes a profound difference. I have personally seen his work transform people for the better. This new book delivers an elegant, compelling process for real growth in leaders.’
Peter Horgan, CEO, Omnicom MediaGroup, ANZ
‘One of the hardest challenges we face as leaders is getting people to change. What this book reveals is that the easiest and best way to get others to change is to change ourselves. This book is for any leader ready for that life-changing commitment.’
Elaine Lim, Asean Talent Development Leader, EY
‘Michael Bunting's work is life-changing. This book is his best work yet. It codifies a clear process for genuine transformation in leaders and cultures and takes us far beyond where we thought we could go.’
Aimee Buchanan, CEO, GroupM Australia & New Zealand
‘Every leader should read this book. It will help you understand why people struggle to change and what you can do to enable yourself and others to reach their full potential. An enjoyable, educative read — I highly recommend it.’
Radoslava (Radi) Anguelova, Head of Corporate Human Resources, Swarovski
‘This book brilliantly reveals the secret inner world that really drives leaders. It helps us to choose wisdom over fear, values over self-centredness and awareness over numbness to become the best leader we can be.’
Jason Smith, SVP & President, International, Allergan Aesthetics, an AbbVie company
‘This book helps us understand why we so rarely find leaders who truly walk their talk and why those who do are exceptional. It reveals the inner world that drives our actions and decisions, and lays out a clear map to eliminate the gap between what we think, what we say and what we do. This is the book to read if you want to really understand the why, what and how of self-awareness and team psychological safety.’
Commodore Eric Young, CSC, RAN, Director General Navy People
Vertical Growth
HOW SELF-AWARENESS TRANSFORMS LEADERS AND ORGANISATIONS
MICHAEL BUNTING WITH CARL LEMIEUX
First published in 2023 by John Wiley & Sons Australia, Ltd
Level 1, 155 Cremorne St, Richmond Vic 3121
© Worksmart Australia Pty Ltd, 2023
The moral rights of the authors have been asserted
ISBN: 978-0-730-39551-5
All rights reserved. Except as permitted under the Australian Copyright Act 1968 (for example, a fair dealing for the purposes of study, research, criticism or review), no part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, communicated or transmitted in any form or by any means without prior written permission. All inquiries should be made to the publisher at the address above.
Cover design by WileyCover image by © Anita Ponne/Shutterstock
DisclaimerThe material in this publication is of the nature of general comment only, and does not represent professional advice. It is not intended to provide specific guidance for particular circumstances and it should not be relied on as the basis for any decision to take action or not take action on any matter which it covers. Readers should obtain professional advice where appropriate, before making any such decision. To the maximum extent permitted by law, the authors and publisher disclaim all responsibility and liability to any person, arising directly or indirectly from any person taking or not taking action based on the information in this publication.
Free bonus resources
To make the most of this book, make sure to sign up to our companion web app at mymatrix.themindfulleader.com
Easy-to-use tool to map your vertical growth journey
Complete real-life case studies mapped for you
Additional resources to support your understanding
Author’s note
Throughout this book we feature case studies from 26 top global leaders at Novartis, EY, Amryt Pharma, Sanofi, Lonza, Takeda Pharmaceuticals and Ubisoft. (Note that while we work with a wide range of industries, in the process of writing this book we were focused heavily on pharmaceutical companies.) The majority of these leaders attended a rigorous leadership development program with me over a period of 12 to 18 months, and I have a personal relationship with all of them. A large percentage of them are or were from Novartis, simply because much of our breakthrough thinking evolved as a result of working with their top 300 global leaders in an 18-month leadership development program. While this book was being edited, Novartis underwent a major corporate restructure, which means that some of the Novartis leaders featured in the book have been promoted or moved and some are now making the world a better place in other important organisations.
We can never express enough gratitude to the leaders who shared their real and vulnerable stories for this book. You are our ‘why’, you make this world a better place. Thank you.
Michael Bunting
INTRODUCTIONThe vertical growth imperative
‘The snake that cannot shed its skin must perish.’
Friedrich Nietzsche
Sheila Frame, President of the Americas for the pharmaceutical company Amryt Pharma, shared with me her past experience of work days spent putting out one fire after another. There were times when she struggled with proactively setting an agenda and creating a plan for her team, and when her team members didn't really know what was expected of them, she would step in and solve problems for them.
She became aware of this self-defeating pattern and what was creating it only when she went through a vertical growth training program. As she explained to me, ‘I started to realise that my resistance to planning, goal setting and proactivity came from my wanting to keep my options open, because I like to be in the action. I’m a master at managing a crisis. It’s an adrenaline rush for me and I love it. So why would I be more proactive when it would cut off my opportunity to be in the centre of all the action?’
Until Sheila experienced this moment of self-awareness, goal setting or proactive planning skills were of little value to her. She would simply revert to her default behaviour pattern. She was driven by her unconscious need for the short-term gratification of managing crises, which took precedence over her aspiration to create a more strategic focus in her team.
Sheila first needed to see this pattern to realise how she was contributing to the team dysfunction. This is what self-awareness and vertical growth are all about, and why they are far more important for long-term leadership success than leadership theories, tools and techniques. Instead of reacting to challenges and opportunities based on our programmed algorithms, we develop enough awareness to recognise our algorithms in action and question their value.
Self-aware people who, like Sheila, embrace a vertical growth mindset see themselves as a continual work in progress and become progressively less afraid to look at themselves honestly. Through the process of developing self-awareness, they begin to realise that their dysfunctional patterns of behaviour have nothing to do with their self-worth.
This realisation is a pivotal growth moment. They understand that all human beings, even the best of us, have conditioned patterns of behaviour, and these patterns can be recognised, questioned and changed, and are therefore logically not who we fundamentally are. With this understanding, their growth accelerates. They take things less personally and are less interested in defending and protecting their image and more interested in becoming more aware and adaptive in a complex world. As leadership expert Edwin Friedman observed, ‘Leaders who are willing to make a lifetime commitment to their own continual self-regulated growth can make any leadership theory or technique look brilliant.’
Horizontal skills and knowledge versus vertical growth
In our work, we differentiate between horizontal development and vertical growth. Horizontal development is about acquiring knowledge and developing new skills to bring about a new competency. While improving horizontal competencies may require repeated practice, it typically requires no growth in self-awareness or self-regulation. Simple examples might be learning planning skills or mastering MS Word or Excel.
In a leadership development context, it can be easy to confuse leadership development principles and training with vertical growth. For example, the leadership techniques and practices needed to ‘enable others to act’ or to apply ‘agile methodology’ are typically taught as a set of horizontal skills, learnable by any leader, regardless of his or her level of self-awareness and maturity. The mistake we often make is that when these skills are applied poorly or inappropriately, we assume the techniques and skills we were taught were inadequate. This is rarely the case. It's a vertical growth challenge.
Vertical growth involves both downward seeing and upward growth. We see downward (vertically) into our unconscious patterns of thought and behaviour and learn to deal with them with awareness, patience and compassion. The more we do this, the more we increase our ability to grow upward in the direction of our values, aspirations and ideals. Through vertical growth, we are able to train our mind to engage less in the reactive and programmed algorithms of our mind and body, and more in a deliberate and flexible set of behaviours based on our aspirations and values.
In short, as illustrated in figure I.1 (overleaf), with vertical growth we explore downward in ourselves to resolve our deep-seated assumptions, fears and patterns in order to grow upward into our best selves. It's an ‘inside-out’ job rather than an ‘outside-in’ job. This, combined with basic behavioural science (prompts, rituals and the like) and the necessary horizontal skills, delivers on the promise of amazing leadership and healthy cultures. We can briefly summarise the two forms of development as follows:
Horizontal development
means developing the skills and gaining the knowledge I need to work in the organisation to get my job done efficiently, effectively and safely.
Figure I.1: vertical versus horizontal development
Vertical development
means developing the ability to change how I perceive and value my inner and outer world (mindset), then building the self-regulating awareness to support the development of new behaviours in a sustainable way aligned with my core values.
This book focuses on vertical growth and presents a detailed process for going about it, on both a personal and organisational level.
In leadership development, personal behaviour change or culture change, horizontal development is just not enough. Leaders may learn the specific skills of strategic planning, conflict management, productivity improvement and empowerment on the assumption that understanding the what and how is enough for the skills to be applied and embedded. Organisations may publish new values statements, explain them really clearly and educate people on their importance on the assumption that it will result in culture change. But it will not.
Horizontal development is extremely important, even in the complex field of leadership development and culture change, but alone it's a false promise. It is not enough, because horizontal skills and knowledge compete with fears, limiting beliefs and other mental models that keep us locked in habitual patterns and reactive loops. Seeing and changing these loops is the function of vertical development.
In leadership terms, this is when ‘walking the talk’ becomes far more consistent. A term we like to use in our work is the self-examined mind. This is the stage of development in which a person consciously authors his or her values and daily behaviour, instead of being trapped in the unconscious reactivity of what Harvard development experts Robert Kegan and Lisa Lahey call image management.
Image management refers to the time and energy we waste in organisations on blame, denial, deflection, defence, gossiping, politics, saving face, masking our weaknesses and other fear-based strategies to make ourselves feel safe or look good. Kegan and Lahey maintain that image management is a second job for most people in typical organisations. One research study we performed involving more than 5000 people from various global organisations indicated that image management may suck up about 40 per cent of people's time and energy on average. This is a staggering waste of time and energy, costing billions of dollars.
More critically, image management creates values breaches, wherein people fail to speak up or admit mistakes, judge or blame others, and avoid addressing inefficiencies — all to ensure their image is protected. This arrests growth, damages leadership credibility, shuts down innovation and impacts mental health, while keeping relationships superficial.
Margaret Dean, Head of People and Organisation at Novartis Oncology, shared with me her view of vertical growth as about recognising and dissolving her self-defeating patterns. She explained, ‘One of the key insights in my process was to start seeing the stories and patterns I have developed as a way of protecting myself. I've had to reflect and be deliberate about letting go of them in order to create the life I want. It's much easier just to ignore these patterns and keep living them. But when I'm willing to peel back the layers of the onion and ask myself if this is really what I want, I can see what's not serving me and holding me back.
‘So growth for me is about letting go of old beliefs and patterns and replacing them with awareness and curiosity to enable the development of more thoughtful, mindful ways of behaving. This requires us to always push ourselves out of our comfort zone where we can learn something new.’
With vertical growth, we are no longer looking outward but rather are turning inward. We're bringing a level of precise awareness to our inner thoughts, emotions, sensations and behavioural patterns. We're questioning why we behave in certain ways, why we are emotionally triggered by certain things.
Vertical growth requires a willingness to face tremendously difficult truths about our thoughts and behaviours while cultivating an attitude of kindness and patience towards ourselves. The amazing payoff is an increased capacity to choose our behaviours with insight, wisdom and compassion.
As Paul Spittle, Chief Commercial Officer of General Medicines at the biopharmaceutical firm Sanofi, told me, ‘Vertical growth is having a better understanding of your thoughts, emotions and behaviours. And related to that, allowing yourself to accept some things that you wish weren't true about your behaviour and thinking, then asking, “What do I do about that? How do I use that?” We have an incredible capacity to deny the worst things about our behaviour, but if we can't face these things, we can't work on them or develop further.’
Paul's colleague Kevin Callanan, a Senior Vice President of Sanofi, added, ‘For me, vertical growth is being able to stop and look at situations and my emotions. The more I look, the more I can separate my ego or wants and desires from what is best for the team or organisation as a whole. I have more clarity and I make better, more informed decisions. I also have more empathy towards others and inner peace.
‘And that's not an easy thing to do, especially for someone like me who has a thirst for action and a thirst to respond. So there's always that inner conflict between my immediate desire to move quickly and get things done, and my desire to slow down and be more conscious and deliberate.’
Brian Gladsden, Head of Worldwide Commercial and Portfolio Strategy at Novartis Oncology, put it even more simply, ‘To me, vertical growth comes from being clear on my personal values, but more importantly, the real growth comes from feeding those values. Am I nourishing what's most important to me?’
To use an analogy, horizontal development is like having a computer operating system such as Microsoft Windows and adding apps like MS Word, Whatsapp and other useful programs to facilitate our work. But vertical growth is about changing the entire operating system to generate more power and manage greater complexity. That then enables a much smarter use of the apps and programs.
Vertical growth within organisations
The head of culture for a multinational division once called us for strategic advice. I asked her what she had implemented so far. She had been busy with endless events and webinars on a huge range of relevant and interesting subjects. Her people were practically drowning in cool events and awesome guest speakers.
‘How effective has it been so far?’ I asked.
She was silent for a moment, before admitting with embarrassment that the culture and leadership behaviour was as bad as ever.
She was implementing what we call an ‘information spray-and-pray’ approach to development, throwing masses of information at people, hoping at least some of it would stick and actually change behaviour. But all the information and skill building in the world are not enough to deliver long-term, significant sustainable cultural change. We need to go deeper.
A common mistake organisations make that contributes to this wasted investment is believing that cultivating self-awareness and personal growth are a matter of developing new skills or gaining new knowledge. Unfortunately, this simplistic approach entirely misses the point.
Focusing on horizontal skills and training without vertical growth is like planting a flower in poorly fertilised soil. Unable to take root or gain the necessary nourishment to grow, it cannot flourish and will inevitably just wither away. An organisation can spend millions of dollars training its leaders in horizontal skills and knowledge, but it's a poor investment unless it's preceded and supported by vertical growth (and the use of behavioural science). Without a foundation of vertical growth, our ability to apply horizontal skills and knowledge wisely is limited, although, ironically, we typically remain in denial of these limitations. To change our behaviour we must first see it and explore it objectively in order to best understand where it comes from as well as cultivate the ability to manage it in real time.
One client we worked with was interested in developing accountability and a growth mindset in their organisation. They introduced the concept of ‘victim versus players’ borrowed from another leadership development provider. They wanted ‘players’ in their teams — people who did not make excuses or play victim, but were proactive and had a can-do attitude. Unfortunately, it quickly became apparent that applying this concept in their culture was backfiring. When someone challenged an idea or way of working, or challenged poor behaviour in an attempt to hold people accountable, they were accused of being a victim.
Many well-intentioned people within the organisation were embodying a player mentality, but the lack of self-awareness and vertical growth in many of the leaders resulted in a distortion of the intention behind the principles. A ‘player’ became someone who agreed to any request, worked unreasonable hours and accepted poor behaviour. This is why it is so dangerous to ignore vertical growth. All too often, wonderful horizontal knowledge and skills end up getting twisted into the very opposite of their intent.
With vertical growth training, we transcend the unconscious emotional and reactive brain to connect with our higher-order brain functions that allow us to self-regulate as well as make more informed and creative decisions. Vertical growth enables us to more readily bypass the conditioned reactions that have kept us safe over the years but now hold us back from our full potential and deepest happiness.
Furthermore, personal vertical growth enables leaders to empower and develop their people. Susanne Schaffert, President of Novartis Oncology, shared with me why vertical growth is important to her, ‘When it comes to dealing with a crisis, what leaders are asked for is not specific skillsets. It goes much deeper than that. What we are asked to do is inspire people toward achieving common goals. We are asked to energise and comfort people and give them confidence. The biggest impact we can have as leaders is not what we personally do with our skills, but rather what we inspire our people to do through our character. And how can we become inspirational leaders if we are not grounded, balanced and mindful? It's impossible.’
Vertical growth cuts through image management
‘So, Pat, how did it go with your boss, Robin?’ I asked.
‘Not great,’ Pat replied.
‘What happened?’
‘Well, after we completed that anonymous survey on Robin's leadership, we were invited to a meeting to discuss the results. When we got into the meeting, the very first thing Robin said was, “Team, thanks for the feedback. There's good stuff in there, but I just want to say that you have all rated me poorly on empowerment, and I totally disagree with your ratings. I know I'm great at empowering you.”
‘The entire team and I just sat there and nodded in agreement. We were wrong, Robin was right. Robin left the meeting smiling, we left feeling disengaged once again. I remember promising myself I'd never be honest again. What's the point? But, you know, pretty much every boss I've had has been the same.’
Sadly, defensiveness, denial and even blame occur every day in organisations, families and relationships. Instead of taking a self-aware, growth-mindset approach to life's challenges, like Robin we often defend our self-image to protect ourselves from emotional discomfort. We don't do this because we are dishonest or because we don't want to grow. Rather, we have been hijacked by our primitive brain and the old coping mechanisms that were designed to help us manage difficult feelings like overwhelm, fear, hurt and insecurity.
To add to this, our research indicates that less than 10 per cent of us have been educated on how to regulate our emotions, handle challenging feedback and cultivate self-awareness. Is it any wonder that we so often choose protection over growth, image management over vulnerability and numbness over facing difficult feelings?
This phenomenon negatively impacts mental wellbeing, careers, families, teams, organisations, even nations. It ensures we keep repeating behaviour patterns that don't serve us or others well. This is the price tag of a lack of self-awareness and the associated absence of a vertical growth mindset.
Given that up to 40 per cent of an organisation's time and energy may be wasted on image management, it's no wonder that engagement levels in organisations are so low. In the second half of 2021, for example, Gallup reported that employee engagement rates in the United States had dropped to a dismal 34 per cent. The ratio of engaged to actively disengaged workers in the US is 2.1 to 1, down from 2.6 to 1 in 2020.1
As humans we are hardwired for self-protection and survival, which includes the need to please and be accepted by our tribe. Managing one's image is a modern-day survival mechanism. We can spend a lifetime in this mode without consciously noticing it, including enjoying a brilliant career and accomplished life, as seen through the lens of society. So why do we need self-awareness and vertical growth?
Behind the gloss of image management, we can actually suffer tremendously. The vast majority of accomplished leaders secretly experience ‘imposter syndrome’. If we dig a little deeper, they will admit they need validation to deal with deep insecurities. (McKinsey & Company coined the term the ‘insecure overachiever’ to describe this global phenomenon.) As a result, they struggle with being truly values-based. Andre Viljoen, CEO of Fiji Airways, calls this phenomenon ‘the plastic hero’. No amount of external success will ever make Pinocchio (our self-image) a real boy or girl. The fancy titles, and the deference and privilege that come with them, are not who we are. Secretly, we know this, and we dread the inevitable loss of this image.
The greatest privilege of our careers has been earning the trust of exceptionally talented and successful people who have had the courage to admit that image is not satisfying, that one never reaches a golden moment when image management results in deep self-acceptance and true inner peace. We have worked with wonderful people who have grown beyond the need for protection and image approval and sought out a life of inner exploration, personal growth and internal congruence to find a profound sense of joy, meaning and resilience.
This is the purpose of developing self-awareness and embracing vertical growth. We are blessed with an amazing mind–body system that has an astonishing capacity for lifelong learning, the development of noble, inspiring qualities, and the realisation of profound inner congruence and wellbeing. Those who can unleash this capacity can make a profound impact on culture, performance and wellbeing in organisations.
This is why we are particularly passionate about focusing on leaders. The research shows that nothing impacts people's work experience and performance more than the behaviour of those in leadership roles. Having self-aware leaders who consciously self-lead within an organisation is how we create values-based, high-trust innovative organisations that build people up and increase psychological safety, wellbeing and performance in today's increasingly complex and uncertain world.
Why self-awareness is critical
A self-aware person can view their thoughts, emotions, conditioned patterns and reactions objectively. Through the development of self-awareness, we become present, compassionate, honest, curious, committed and transformational. The greater our self-awareness, the greater our capacity to align our behaviour with our noblest intentions and values.
Conversely, the less self-aware we are, the more we are subject to our unconscious thoughts, beliefs and assumptions as well as the conditioned patterns and behaviours that move us away from our best self with all of its potential.
Nurturing and protecting an image involves a fundamental confusion in the mind. As a result of childhood conditioning, what people think of us comes to determine our self-worth, and slowly but surely we disconnect from our core and become lost in patterns that soothe that loss. This is why the journey into authenticity and self-awareness is both challenging and extraordinarily rewarding. It's our journey back home to ourselves. We come to see that image management is exhausting and sustains a perpetual sense of imposter syndrome.
Leaders who embrace the self-awareness journey become a beacon of growth and psychological safety for those around them. Instead of denying their mistakes, they are honest with themselves and others. They are interested, even excited, by seeing behaviours in themselves that are not working and they are courageous enough to admit it. Instead of justifying, ignoring and denying actions that hold them back from deeper insight and wiser choices, they want to understand where, how and why they're falling short on their values and aspirations. And by doing so they give others the safety and permission to do the same.
Becoming deliberately developmental
Cultivating our capacity for growth is a lifelong journey, not a short course. Leadership expert John C. Maxwell recounts, ‘The first year I engaged in intentional personal growth, I discovered that it was going to be a lifetime process. During that year, the question in my mind changed from “How long will this take?” to “How far can I go?” ’
But how do we intentionally grow, particularly as adults, when our beliefs and behaviours have become ingrained in us? What does it even mean to grow? And how does it work in groups and organisations?
Intentional vertical growth requires us to be deliberately developmental, meaning we apply conscious and deliberate practices that help us grow as human beings. When leaders become deliberately developmental, it becomes possible to do this growth work as an entire organisation. Kegan and Lahey call this a Deliberately Developmental Organisation (DDO).
In this book, you will first learn how to develop a self-aware, psychologically safe growth mindset in yourself. Part I focuses on understanding how our brain works to hijack our best efforts and how to train our brain to work for us rather than against us. We introduce the Mindful Leader Matrix, our formal tool for helping leaders and organisations become deliberately and consistently values-aligned, growth-based and psychologically safe.
Part II reviews the central role of developmental mindfulness in the self-awareness process. Here we will dig deep into vertical growth to gain a greater context for applying the Mindful Leader Matrix.
Finally, in Part III, we will examine how you can apply the process within your team and organisation. You will learn how to hold yourself and others accountable in healthy ways that promote positive growth and psychological safety, rather than fostering distrust and resentment. You will learn a detailed process for building a Deliberately Developmental Organisation (DDO) which will lead to improved productivity and effectiveness. The 40 per cent of your people's time that is currently wasted on image management can be redirected toward learning, innovation and growth.
In short, you will learn the core practices that support lifelong vertical growth, enabling you to lead consistently in a way that inspires and makes your world, and that of others, a better place. Far from being an expression of naïve idealism, it is becoming increasingly clear that people expect these results from businesses and other institutions. Our client EY expresses this beautifully in their core purpose: ‘Building a better working world’.
Cultivating inner psychological safety
As Sanofi's Paul Spittle suggested, cultivating self-awareness inevitably elicits a deeper level of honesty with ourselves. We begin to see the full range of our thoughts, assumptions, feelings and behaviours, much of which we were previously in denial about or numb to. When we do, our most common response is to judge and reprimand ourselves for our ‘bad’ feelings, thoughts, assumptions and behaviours. As a result, we very quickly lose two of the most important vertical growth tools: curiosity and compassion.
There can be no learning or new insight without curiosity. As the great depth psychologist A. H. Almaas said in a lecture I attended, ‘Without the emotional safety compassion provides us, we very quickly lose interest in uncovering difficult truths we need to deal with. It's too painful to look at, so instead we shut down and go back to familiar coping mechanisms such as blaming others, denying and numbing.’
This is why we must encourage self-compassion and curiosity around why this behaviour is present. Self-compassion gives us a space of inner psychological safety, which enables our natural curiosity and intelligence to come to the fore. This compassion and curiosity also enables us to boldly try new behaviours, to stumble, to take chances and experiment, to learn and grow without that harsh inner critic beating us up over the inevitable mistakes we make.
Self-compassion expert Kristin Neff, co-founder of the Center for Mindful Self-Compassion and author of Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself, states the obvious: ‘Self-compassion is a healthy way of dealing with the pain of life. By definition, there's no downside to it.’
Margaret Dean, at Novartis Oncology, shared with me how easy it is for her to shame herself when she sees herself falling into the same old controlling, image management patterns with her team members. Mindfulness has taught her to interrupt this pattern in the moment. She said, ‘I always compound my behaviour by beating myself up, which only makes things worse. For me it feels like a shameful feeling, like I need to take a shower. My brain asks over and over, Why did you just do that? Why didn't I see that in the moment? But I'm learning to tell myself, That's part of being human. It's okay. Everyone screws up once in a while. And I can hold it more lightly and more easily look at my behaviour with curiosity and interest instead of judgement and shame.’
Psychological safety is also vital for growth, innovation and trust in a team setting. We will discuss in great detail how to create an environment of psychological safety in Part III. In our experience, leaders who learn to cultivate self-compassion for themselves then become more caring and compassionate with their teams.
UC-Berkeley Professor of Psychology Serena Chen writes in a 2018 HBR article, ‘… self-compassion encourages a growth mindset is also relevant here… Research shows that when leaders adopt a growth mindset…they're more likely to pay attention to changes in subordinates’ performance and to give useful feedback… Subordinates, in turn, can discern when their leaders have growth mindsets, which makes them more motivated…’
