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What Do You Do When Everything You've Been Taught About Work-Life Balance Doesn't Work?
Are you a person looking for Personal Transformation?
Are you looking for Personal growth books?
Stop looking. This book is an excellent opportunity to think about your life and how it affects your happiness and well-being. It's a look back at the author's struggle with a lack of happiness as well as his encounters with people going through similar issues. Most significantly, the book asks key questions for you to apply decision making and problem solving techniques in the major areas of your life so that you can figure out what happiness means to you and how to best pursue well-being.
With this book, you get the tools you need to have a greater degree of control over your own life, based on the writer's experience of creating a full life map for his ideal self and becoming a participant in his own life.
Perhaps the most important thing this book offers is a reflection on your own questions. In this way, you can become a more active participant in your own development. In the end, you'll be more clear on what a good life looks like to you, allowing you to cultivate it and savor the joys you deserve.
Ignacio Segovia is a psychologist, coach, hypnotist, writer, and lecturer. He holds a bachelor's degree in psychology from the Central University of Venezuela and a master's in industrial-organizational psychology and ergonomics from Paris Nanterre University. Ignacio values his multi-cultural experiences from life in Venezuela, France, Canada, and the United States. As an individual, he is a professional, a Christian, and a family man. He loves his family, Kung fu practice, his golden retrievers, dancing, DJing, Sundays at Potential Church, and his hypnosis time on his hammock. His purpose in life is to partner with people to reach their God-given potential.
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Seitenzahl: 196
Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2022
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Work-Life Balance Doesn’t Work
How to Create Happiness and Well-Being in 5 Steps
Ignacio Segovia
Worklifebalancedoesntwork.com
Work-Life Balance Doesn’t Work: How to Create Happiness and Well-Being in 5 Steps
Ignacio Segovia
Copyright © 2022 Ignacio Segovia
ISBN: 978-1-7386913-0-2
Electronic Book ISBN: 978-1-7386913-1-9
All Rights Reserved.
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the author, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.
Disclosure: This book is not meant to cure any mental disorder. The author of this book presents this information as a business/life coach who aims to help individuals discover happiness and well-being in their lives. If you’re suffering from a psychological or psychiatric issue, please seek professional support.
Publisher: Ignacio Jose Segovia
330 Rue Avro
Pointe-Claire, QC, H9R 5W5, Canada.
www.ignaciosegovia.com
www.worklifebalancedoesntwork.com
Ignacio Segovia is available to speak at your business
or conference event on a variety of topics.
For booking information, schedule a call at
https://swiy.co/calendar
Why Read This Book
There’s no easier way to make dramatic changes in your life than recognizing where you are and where you want to be. Almost every major book on personal development, from Napoleon Hill’s Think and Grow Rich to Jordan B. Peterson’s12 Rules for Life, emphasizes the importance of self-awareness for a full life well lived. This book explains how to get the most out of life by learning how to master self-awareness in only five simple steps.
Self-awareness appears to be a mystery to most people, yet it may be easily achieved by children! Hundreds of academic studies have confirmed the effectiveness of taking personal responsibility and leadership in any area of life in treating mental issues, modifying habits, and gaining emotional control. It has the ability to make you rich as well. In some ways, this book will pay for itself through your success. This easy five-step process can assist you in overcoming difficulties, being more creative, and starting a new chapter in your life.
Are you ready to make a difference in your life?
Do you want to make these improvements feel permanent and important?
This book presents the evidence and then guides you through methods based on research in a straightforward step-by-step structure, ensuring that you take the actions you need to make changes at your own speed and with confidence.
Written by a leading expert with eighteen years of experience in organizational psychology, individual psychotherapy, and coaching.
Get more tools on our website to help you take action on your unique personal objectives!
www.worklifebalancedoesntwork.com
About the Author
Ignacio Segovia is a psychologist, coach, hypnotist, writer, and lecturer. He holds a bachelor’s degree in psychology from the Central University of Venezuela and a master’s in industrial-organizational psychology and ergonomics from Paris Nanterre University in France. He is certified as a professional hypnotist and hypnosis instructor by the International Certification Board of Clinical Hypnotherapy. In Canada, Ignacio studied industrial security at Ryerson University, human resources management at Humber College, social work at Sheridan College, and small business entrepreneurship at Niagara College. His experience as an ergonomics consultant in companies such as PepsiCo, Frito-Lay, Cargill, Global Glass, and ConocoPhillips; his role in small business development under the mentorship of Paul Morgan (Plan2Profit); and his years as a psychotherapist under the supervision of Dr. Dan Dalton provide Ignacio Segovia with all the tools to equip you with solutions in many areas.
Do you want Ignacio J. Segovia to be the motivational speaker at your next event? Request an appointment on his calendar;
https://swiy.co/calendar
Get more tools on our website to help you take action on your unique personal objectives!
www.worklifebalancedoesntwork.com
What Others Are Saying About This Book
“In his book, Ignacio provides incredible and much-needed ‘life solutions’ to the world we live in today with so many changes happening around us. He helps us live happy and efficient lives not only through his teachings but also through his own life experiences. As Ignacio explains, ‘Magic will appear when you are ready,’ and I assure you it will if you follow his guidance. He prepares you for it through the steps this amazing book details. If you commit and stay open to the valuable five steps Ignacio shares, you will transition from your old paradigm to a new one full of events that will surprise you.”
Paola Valencia, Global Tender Management and Compliance, Client
“Ignacio explores one of the most important topics anyone can consider; how to get this life right. More than exploring, he gives you a step-by-step process to find the happiness that eludes so many people. If you are seeking a road map to a fulfilling and meaningful life, you need look no further.”
Joshua Cadillac, Residential & Commercial Real Estate Sales Expert and Trainer
“In his newest book, author and hypnotist Ignacio Segovia will lead you through a step-by-step analysis to find your path to a happier, more successful life. He himself is living proof that you can make dynamic changes in your life. Where are you now? Where do you want to be? Let Ignacio help you answer these questions and reach your goals.”
Jayne M. Wesler, Psycotherapist, Attorney, Author, Coach & Speaker
“Have unresolved challenges from your past spilled over into your present life? Do not feel overwhelmed or defeated. Use Ignacio Segovia’s 5-Step Method as your map for making change and creating positive foundations for your life.”
Silvia Alf, College Literature Professor
“This book begins with the author’s personal experience with depression and shows how you are not alone in this kind of journey. Famous figures such as The Rock and Robin Williams are cited in this book to demonstrate that the work-balance life is a fallacy that we have grown up with but DOES NOT produce a happy life. In this book, Ignacio Segovia provides a very logical path to truly achieving happiness and well-being to keep your life in +5 style or as close to it as you can get. Thank you, Ignacio, for bringing to light the fact that you need to know and work on yourself to find your own meaning and happiness.”
Zuheymar Brazon, EC-4 Bilingual Generalist Teacheor
“This book gives great knowledge that can help you in your day-to-day life. It also gives you the tools to move forward and live a happy life.”
Alejandro Duarte, CEO at Alewho IT Solutions, Client
“A wonderful modern approach to positive psychology. Very easy, personable reading that speaks directly to people ready to make a change in their lives. If you are an immigrant dealing with many adversities and trying to fit in or struggling with the radical social changes of this era or social media pressure or life challenges, this book will show you that you are not alone and there are ways to thrive and move toward a much more satisfying stage of life.”
Isabel Brazon, Director of Baila Baila, Songwriter and Singer
Table of Contents
Chapter 1 | Installing the WEB
Chapter 2 | Pay Attention to Your Life—Attention is the New Currency
Chapter 3 | The Steps to Happiness and Well-Being
Chapter 4 | Open Your Mind
Chapter 5 | Faith: Presuppositions, Vision Purpose, & Strategy
Chapter 6 | The Components of Your Essence
Chapter 7 | Invest in Relationships That Make You Happy
Chapter 8 | Have Faith in Your Financial Life
Chapter 9 | Bonding Strategies
Chapter 10 | It Really Works!
Chapter 11 | Now What?
Work-Life Balance Doesn’t Work
How to Achieve Happiness and Well-Being in 5 Steps
Your life isn’t simply a collection of Instagram photos. A wonderful happy moment may happen to you sometimes, but it’s an exception. Life’s how your children greet you at the door after coming home from work every day (ten minutes each day). It’s how you interact with one another over dinner (ninety minutes every day).
If you can, get those basic tasks right, those things you do every day, things that bring happiness, well-being, and success daily, then put them all together as one. You will notice they are not minor; they represent a substantial amount of your life’s content. Change those moments, and you will change your life.
Hello, my name is Ignacio Segovia “The Ergon.”
Ignacio means “fiery one.”
Segovia means “the path to victory.”
If you allow me, I can be your fiery friend on your path to victory.
Chapter 1 | Installing the WEB
The Rocks from the earth also need help with mental health.
“I found that with depression, one of the most important things you can realize is that you’re not alone. You’re not the first to go through it. You’re not gonna be the last to go through it.” —Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson
This meeting room is dark at night. The only light is the moon’s reflection on the white snow outside. During the day, it’s full of smiles. However, now, this once social place is dark. Full of sadness and tears. This conference room is; the place of refuge from bullies, harassment, and hypocrisy; the place where a grown man can express his emotions, his pain, his fear, his frustration. And I know it is not only me. Yesterday one of the guys at the warehouse approached me and said: “You are not the only one who feels this way. I have been praying too. I cannot believe the kind of people we have to deal with in here. I am sick of it, and I ask our Lord to help. I beg Him to have mercy on these people who mistreat us.”
He tried to hide it, but I saw it. A tear rolled down his cheek before he left.
However, the only thing I can see in this dark room is the cold snow outside the window, which depresses me further, but I feel more secure here than outside. I just came back from the warehouse area, the domain of my enemy—the warehouse lead. Even though he is supposed to report to me, the warehouse manager is nobody in front of a unionized person in this company. How can I feel like this? This is not normal. After all the real-life threatening situations as a firefighter and all the situations that involved gun violence in my home country, why can I not handle this amount of sabotage from the warehouse lead?
There is something wrong with me. I go through so many different emotions. One minute I’m laughing and having fun with my friends. The next, I’m crying because I’m afraid of what will happen to me at work.
The next day, it was decided I needed to do something to change this situation. But what situation? I do not know what is happening. First, I need to understand what is happening to me. I notice all these emotions resemble the conditions of my clients with depression. Let’s take the evaluation to see what is happening. OMG! Forty-nine points out of fifty. I am seriously depressed. I need to consult other colleagues. I cannot handle this alone.
I am lucky to be part of Dalton Associates. Let me talk with Dr. Dalton and find the best team of people to get out of this crazy depression. It was not easy, but with an amazing team of people behind me, I decided to take some time off work to take care of myself and my family; one of the best decisions in my life, but the people at work did not think the same.
It is not comfortable to be sitting on the sick people’s bench. I can feel how people look at me at the Mood Disorders Clinic at the University of Toronto. But the curiosity of seeing my brain on the qEEG brain map excited me very much.
After a couple of months, I was off medication, but I was not ready yet to go back to the office. I was feeling pressure from my friend that referred me to the company to get back soon because they needed me or they needed to hire another person for the position.
Against the recommendations from my therapist, I decided to get back to the office. Wrong decision. The news that I was on mental health leave was spread all over the company, and the judgment eyes were all on me. For two weeks, the pressure on me was worse than ever to the point that I was guided without noticing to present my resignation because “it was the best for both parties.”
That was my last shot after ten winters of hard work in Canada. I will never be successful in this country. I need to go.
Thank God for the wife I have. She was my strength and my pillar during the slippery moments as an immigrant in Canada. And she understands it’s not possible for me to continue fighting with a society that doesn’t accept me as I am.
But I had a plan…
And as you will see before you finish this book, it was a good plan: a plan that allowed me to achieve happiness and well-being for myself and my family.
* * *
Do you want to be happy?
Do you want happiness for your loved ones?
Do you think everybody wants to be happy?
After thousands of years of looking for the holy grail of happiness, why do we find, over and over again, histories of people with anxiety, depression, stress, suicidal thoughts, etc.?
Will it be possible for you to eat the fruit of happiness at some point in your life?
And the certain response to that question is no. You cannot eat the fruit of happiness because happiness is not one fruit; it is more like a fruit salad.
When I shared with you my episode of depression in Canada, I only shared the miserable feelings created in my work environment. For sure, those job conditions were terrible for me—actually, not only for me. The person before me also resigned under severe personal depression (nobody told me that at the beginning). But certainly, that was not enough to put me against the ropes. I had much more than that on my hands. I was burning the candle at both ends for sure.
My wife and I were working different jobs. My son Samuel was a newborn, and Sabrina was two years old, and we did not have family support. I was worried about my parents’ life back in Venezuela. The three properties we had at that moment needed my attention. It was much more than work-life unbalance. It was work-wife-kids-entrepreneurship-friends-finances-spiritual-immigration-physical health-emotional-weather-political-social-mental-career … super unbalanced… you get the idea.
I did need to narrow the story to only my job-related problems in my first paragraph to get your attention. Our brains need to simplify all our problems to get a solution, and usually, the easy solution is to think that money will solve all our problems.
With time, humans have been noticing that money and power are not the only solutions or the only paths to achieving happiness. Work—our money/power center of life—was not the only important variable. Therefore the phrase “Work-Life Balance” was created with two groups to focus on, but guess what? There are many other groups in the happiness equation.
I do not think I need to expand much on the problem. People are suffering, and it is clear why. We all know that all or at least a big part of the happiness we see on social media is lies. All the beautiful pics and the fabulous reels do not project real people’s happiness. The numbers show a different reality. Domestic violence, gun incidents on the streets, drug and alcohol abuse, suicidal cases, etc., are just the tip of the iceberg in a post-pandemic society where it is not clear if going back to the office is a good idea. Who will make the decisions? Who will be the less crazy political leader—“the one”—to handle this “new normal?”
We are living in unprecedented times in human history. Therefore you need to make unprecedented decisions to live the life you want, the life that you and your loved ones deserve.
In these moments, you cannot oversimplify the dynamic in a “work-life balance” relationship, but you also cannot overcomplicate it in a long list of to-dos to conquer the world as your favorite social media influencer is showing in their account.
So, where should you start? How can you organize all your dreams to achieve happiness in this book?
I will share with you a new human software called World Essence Bond (WEB), and with your help, I will install it in others to prepare us for the metaverse era.
The WEB will help you flourish and achieve the happiness you deserve.
Do you have it all figured out? Are you at the peak of your happiness?
Great. This book will help you maintain it, and you can pass it on to your future generations because life is hard, and things happen. You can prepare for any changes. This book will help you to be prepared for those moments without being over-worried about difficult moments.
Are you a work in progress? Do you have happy moments in your life but also extreme moments of sadness?
Don’t worry. That’s life. I am here at this point. Maybe you are here. Maybe sometimes you are here. Sometimes you have it all figured out. Life is like that—dynamic and changing all the time.
Maybe you can relate right now to my period of depression. Maybe you feel that a lot of people hate you. That your work sucks. That other people’s lives are amazing, but you are stuck in a spiral of bad decisions and bad results. Do not worry. I have been there. There is a way to get out, and you can do it. The trick here is not to shoot for perfection—shoot for the next step.
“But Ignacio, what is the next step?”
To recognize the next step, first, you need to realize where you are right now.
Think about this. On this simple scale, -5 being hell on earth and +5 your perfect life, where are you located right now?
(-5)—(-4)—(-3)—(-2)—(-1)—(+1)—(+2)—(+3)—(+4)—(+5)
Throughout this book, we will move from minus five to plus five, from “I hate life” to “I have it all perfect.” Well, clearly, you have free will. You can move in the other direction. But if you want to move in the other direction from +5 to -5, from a perfect life to “I hate life,” this book is not for you. Close it now and go and be miserable.
If you want to be happy, successful, flourishing, and blessed, accept your talents, and bless others with your talents, this book will take you to the next level on this beautiful path that is worth walking, and we will walk it together.
During our walk on this book adventure, I will share with you five steps to change some basic things in your perception of happiness and well-being and rebuild them under your own standards.
I don’t know if you like Frank Sinatra, but I really love the song “My Way.” And I truly believe the only way to achieve happiness is to understand your own personal state of well-being. In this book, I will introduce you to five steps to achieving your own definition of happiness.
* * *
Maybe in the past, the expression “work-life balance” (WLB) was enough to achieve the American dream and achieve the desired happiness. But not now. I will show you in this book the reasons why you need to change this WLB paradigm to a new one. Around this new paradigm, we will build a new mental, emotional, and behavioral structure that will provide you with the tools you need to build your well-being path to happiness.
If you follow these five steps, you will reach your next level of fulfillment, and you will be able to stay there because you are building it with solid foundations.
But wait, there is more. You will reach a point where you will be ready for your next well-being level. And as you build your muscles in a gym after you learn how to use the machines, you will come back to this book and do it again; come back to these five steps and expand your happiness potential. The trick is to return to this book and do these five steps over and over again.
Everything in life is a cycle of practice. People believe that successful individuals are born with success because you only know that part of their life.
Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson is synonymous with the picture of what it is to be tough and stereotypically “macho.” The Rock has a remarkable personal history, from his pro wrestling career to his present position as one of Hollywood’s most incredible action movie stars. But he’s realized, over time, that vulnerability is an omnipresent part of the human experience. In an interview with People magazine, the actor talked about how he struggled with mental health as a teenager. Since then, he grew the idea that there is nothing unmanly about reaching out to others when you require help.
The Rock put it this way; “The first time I had experienced depression, I was eighteen years old, and I had no idea what depression was,” he said. “Back then, depression was also called ‘get off the couch and get your shit together and change what’s happening here.’
I was an only child, and I was always a better listener than I was a communicator in terms of sharing my feelings,” he said. “And I feel like the most important thing, obviously, is communicating and realizing that asking for help when you’re down and you’re feeling wobbly or when you’re depressed is actually the most powerful thing you can do. Asking for help is not a weakness. As a matter of fact, asking for help is our superpower, and men, especially us, we fall into this trap of being really adverse to vulnerability because we always want to be strong and feel like we can take on the world.
But the truth is you have to, and hopefully, over time, learn to embrace vulnerability and learn to embrace this idea that you can’t always solve everything. A lot of times in life, as you head down the road, you’re going to need help, and it’s all a part of life.”
In my own case, life has been amazing in general. I have lived a very prolific lifestyle. People believe that only billionaires can talk about a prolific life, but this is not true. I know happiness firsthand. I was born in Venezuela, and I lived there in the eighties and nineties before the economic and political crises of that beautiful country. I was a party animal and very successful with girls. Well, that was easy in a country that had ten beautiful girls per man at the parties. I visited every corner of my country, and I was successful in all my endeavors there.
But I not only know happiness firsthand, I also know depression very well. Not only because I graduated as a psychologist and worked with patients with depression. Not only because I lived on the streets of Paris, France, where 21 percent of the population suffers from clinical depression, or in Canada, where 20 percent of the population is depressed. It is because I suffered from it. And at that point in my life, it drove me to drastically change my direction in life and allow me and my family to achieve the well-being we are enjoying in our life right now. For this reason, I have dedicated time to this topic in my professional path, and I have learned from different perspectives the best ways and the best techniques to move from depression to happiness.
