The GR Factor E-Book

Jack R. Nerad

• Herausgeber: E.M. Landsea Publishers LLC
• Kategorie: Geisteswissenschaft
• Sprache: Englisch

Seitenzahl: 243

Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2019

Beschreibung

By unleashing the undeniable power of the Golden Rule you can achieve success in business…and success in life.

Das E-Book The GR Factor wird angeboten von E.M. Landsea Publishers LLC und wurde mit folgenden Begriffen kategorisiert:
Success;Customer satisfaction;Business growth;Motivation;Teamwork;Leadership;Organizational health

Leseprobe

To my brother Eric, who has supported the writing of this book every step of the way.

The GR Factor:

Unleashing the undeniable power of the Golden Rule

By

Jack R. Nerad

Copyright © 2019 by Jack R. Nerad

All rights reserved.

E.M. Landsea Publishers

Chicago | New York | Los Angeles

ISBN: 978-1-7326876-1-5

Chapter One - Establishing the Premise

Chapter Two - What this is all about

Chapter Three - How do we want to be treated?

Chapter Four - Being nice is more than just nice

Chapter Five - Integrity Builds Trust

Chapter Six - A Foundational Rule of Business

Chapter Seven - Live Life Honorably

Chapter Eight - The Customer Is (Almost) Always Right

Chapter Nine - Don’t Just Strive for the Win-Win; Expect It

Chapter Ten - Prepare for Challenges

Chapter Eleven - Who You Are Defines How You Treat Yourself

Chapter Twelve - Treat Yourself as You Would Be Treated

Chapter Thirteen - Dealing with Anger & the Angry

Chapter Fourteen - The GR Factor as Owner

Chapter Fifteen - The GR Factor as a CEO

Chapter Sixteen - The GR Factor as a Middle Manager

Chapter Seventeen - The GR Factor as an Employee/Single Contributor

Chapter Eighteen - The GR Factor as a Supplier/Vendor

Chapter Nineteen - The GR Factor as Customer

Chapter Twenty - The GR Factor as an Individual

Chapter Twenty-One - The GR Factor as a Family Member

Chapter Twenty-Two - Can it All Be This Easy?

Chapter Twenty-Three - Life Among the Piglets: A Real-Life Fable

Chapter Twenty-Four - What Success Is

Chapter Twenty-Five - Surviving Life's Challenges

Chapter Twenty-Six - Betrayal & Healing

Chapter Twenty-Seven - Missing the Point: A True-life Parable

Chapter Twenty-Eight - Justice & Mercy

Chapter Twenty-Nine - Real World Successes

Chapter Thirty - About the Author

To my brother Eric, who has supported the writing of this book every step of the way

CHAPTER ONE

Establishing the Premise

Achieving success in business is difficult.I’m not here to tell you it isn’t. And I’m not here to tell you it can be accomplished with little effort. Business is hard. Customers are demanding; competition is never-ending, and change is forever with us. It is a constant struggle.But while it may be very challenging for each individual engaged in business, for society as a whole the struggle is good because the rigors of doing business weed out poor products and the organizations who attempt to exploit customers rather than to serve them. But what is good for society makes it difficult for those engaged in commerce.

Take it from someone who has done it, starting your own business is hard. Sustaining it is even harder. And I’ve had successes and failures in my own endeavors to prove that.At the same time, working in someone else’s business is hard, because winning and keeping your superiors’ respect is an ongoing challenge. Typically they will never like you as much as they like themselves. And often maintaining your respect for them in the face of their actions that you don’t agree with is even harder.

Establishing and maintaining good relationships with co-workers is hard. Each of us is the product of our unique background and upbringing. We have different value systems. We are motivated by different things. Our worldviews can be radically askew and yet in a business context people need to work together. The rigors of business make it extremely difficult to succeed if employees of an organization can’t find common ground.

Some people are good and motivated by the best intentions. Others are evil and actively pursue evil ends. Many are somewhere in the middle, trying to do what is best for all but at the same time operating in a self-serving manner much of the time. When it comes to a decision between the best interests of the enterprise and the best interests of themselves, they will take themselves every day of the week. In some ways they can’t be blamed because in most large organizations, when it comes to a decision between the best interests of the enterprise and the best interests of the individual employees, the managers of the organization will take the enterprise’s interests — or more to the point the perceived best interests of the top managers — every day of the week. A lot is said about company loyalty, but when push comes to shove company loyalty usually means the company managers are loyal to themselves.

So with all these obstacles to success in business, how does a business owner, a CEO, a middle manager and an individual employee overcome them to prosper? How can owners, managers and employees find common ground that will enable success?

That is what I intend to reveal — at length and in practical steps — in this book. The GR Factor is that common ground. It is that transformative, “oh-yeah” doctrine that will make all else fade into the background.

If you apply the GR Factor to your business and to your life, it will be transformative. You and your business will emerge from the dark shadows of doubt and distrust and enter the light of true cooperation. You will progress from living a life of negatives to living a life of positives.

The goal is finding the good and enabling it to overcome the bad. Oh, the negatives will still be out there waiting to trip you up. The bad will continue to exist among us. But the GR Factor will give you the tools to triumph over the negatives, to float above the detractors and to achieve genuine success. In fact it will give you the vision to see what real success looks like.

For many of us, each workday is a struggle.We find ourselves in situations we don’t like, working with people we don’t care for, and we are unmotivated to do our best work and be our best selves. Deep down we picture ourselves as victims.But if we are victims we are victims of circumstances every human being faces every day. It is difficult to make the case that is genuine victimhood.

With the GR Factor in your life, you will see things differently, because you will have a deeper understanding of your most precious humanity. You will begin approaching each new day as an opportunity, not as a problem. Each day will be a new chance to realize your best potential, not just another twenty-four hours to survive.

Challenges will continue to come your way. New competitors will spring up. New hires in your organization will upset the previous norm and send shockwaves rippling through the enterprise. Natural disasters will occur without warning. You might lose your job or, more to the point, your job might lose you.

But if you follow the simple tenets of the GR Factor as I outline them, you will have an answer to all these challenges and more. You will have a toolkit filled with the keys to real success. And you will be able to face down and overcome adversity with confidence inspired by the self-respect that you have justly earned.

In business and in life, we have two stark choices before us: we can conduct ourselves as animals whose overriding instinct is self-gratification or we can conduct ourselves on the highest plane of humanity with respect, admiration and love for one another.

If you choose the latter way by applying the GR Factor in your life it will enable you to understand what others want by examining what you want. In the following pages, we’ll tell you how to do that in all of your life situations. It has the true power to bring you business success and transform your life.

“The wind blows where it wishes, and you hear the sound of it, but cannot tell where it comes from and where it goes. So is everyone who is born of the Spirit.” (John 3:6-8)

CHAPTER TWO

What this is all about

Most books that offer advice take a leisurely time getting to the key point. Typically there is a long ramp-up to the punchline. You learn a little – or a lot – about the author’s youth, hear something about his or her business experience and then get a slow waltz to the BIG MESSAGE.As has been said so frequently about so many things, there’s nothing wrong with that, but I’ve decided to spare you all the preliminaries. Instead, here it is up front.Based on my forty years of success in various aspects of business here is the essential piece of advice I have to deliver.

This is what I call The GR Factor:

Treat other people the way you want to be treated.

In fact, this is so vitally important for you to know and remember, let me repeat it for emphasis.

Treat other people the way you want to be treated.

If you apply this principle every minute of every day of your life – or as close to that as a human can muster the will to do it – I guarantee you will be successful in business.You will find success running your own business and you will find success as an executive and manager in a business owned by others. Most importantly, you will find fulfillment and joy in your personal life.Every day.

How do I know this?I know this because it has worked for me, and because I have seen it work for others as well. It is a philosophy, a way of life, that breeds success.

If you want to close the book right now, you can – as long as you take to heart the message of treating others as you’d like to be treated and, critically, don’t simply look at that precept as a tool or a technique to be turned on and off like a light switch, but instead make it a vital part of your essential being.In others words, don’t just do it – LIVE IT.

If you can do that, feel free to close the book now.You will have received untold value from the price you paid for this advice, and it might be all you need.You can save yourself the time it will take to read the rest of what I’ve written for you.

But if you are intrigued by this advice or are skeptical that guidance so simple can have a life-changing effect, then I invite you to read on. What I expect to demonstrate to you in the following pages is how this works and why this works IN A BUSINESS CONTEXT. And though you have probably read or heard this advice or something quite like it before, I doubt very much that you have heard it spelled out as a way of furthering your personal success in commerce and industry. And that is what I will concentrate on delivering in the upcoming chapters.

Certainly I am not the first to offer this advice.Those of you who are either religious and/or have studied religion have no doubt come across this counsel many times. In the widely used King James version of the Bible, Jesus Christ said, “And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise.” In the New American Standard version of the Bible, which uses our common vernacular, the same verse says, “Treat others the same way you want them to treat you.”

By way of full disclosure, I am a practicing Christian, and I have tried to abide by this rule for the past fifty years. But a study of other religions and belief systems reveals that this concept is not unique to the New Testament, Christianity or even the Judeo-Christian tradition.Old Testament Leviticus 19:34 is highly studied and often quoted by Jewish scholars. The verse says, “The stranger who resides with you shall be to you as one of your citizens; you shall love him as yourself, for you were strangers in the land of Egypt: I the LORD am your God.”Slightly earlier in Leviticus (19:18) is the message “You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against your kinsfolk. Love your neighbor as yourself: I am the LORD.”

Right now you might be saying to yourself, “I thought I was going to get advice that would help me with my business. I’m not here for Bible study.”That’s fair.But I’m not quoting the Bible for the sake of promulgating religious beliefs. I’m quoting the Bible to demonstrate how pervasive this simple idea is as a style of living.Further, I’m proposing to you that adopting this style of living in your business activities is the key to success.

I can quote you similar verses ascribed to Buddha, to Muhammad, to Confucius, to the Greeks Thales and Sextus the Pythagorean.(Yes, even Sextus the Pythagorean.)You will find similar admonitions in the Pahlavi Texts of Zoroastrianism, the Tirukkural of the Tamil Tradition, the Torah, the Talmud, the New Testament of the Bible and the Quran.There are subtle differences in the messages and perhaps less subtle differences in how the messages are understood and, importantly, practiced, but there is no doubt that many of the great philosophers, religious leaders, prophets and even the Savior Himself found the ideal of treating others as one would like to be treated as important – and often central – to the daily observation of a religious life.

You might say, “I am not religious; I don’t care who in the deep, dark past uttered this mumbo-jumbo. I live in the present.” To you I would make two observations. First, religious observance dates back to the beginning of recorded human history, and it continues to be an important part of the daily life of millions of your contemporaries. It is not an anachronism. Second, for those who do not believe in a God or in religion at all, it is important to grasp that two of the world’s most prevalent secular philosophies – Existentialism and Humanism – pay some homage to the simple entreaty to behave in a manner that promotes the greater good.The Humanist philosophy is, arguably, more explicit in suggesting that doing good for others is to be encouraged, while the Existentialists (those darn Existentialists) center their thinking around the fact (hope?) that if individuals make their choices wisely they will always trend toward what is best for the largest number.

Again, all this is cited not in the attempt to promote a single religion or philosophy, but instead to demonstrate that the guiding premise of this book, which is designed to improve your business fortunes, is a premise that has deep roots in antiquity and, at the same time, is widely expressed and believed today.Again, if at this point you say, “I got it,” and you close the book, you will reap the many benefits of adhering to this style of living IF YOU ACT ON IT DAILY.

And this is where I believe I can provide help. Many of you might be thinking, yes, I’ve heard that before, sounds reasonable, but in my daily life, and especially in my business life, I can’t act that way.I’d be nothing but a pushover; in minutes I’d be crushed by more aggressive, “me-first” competitors.But that is where I believe you would be very wrong, and the purpose of the remainder of this book is to prove that to you…and to demonstrate to you how treating others as you want to be treated is indeed the best way for business success.

“And the second, like it, is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.” (Mark 12:31)

“The work of righteousness will be peace, And the effect of righteousness, quietness and assurance forever.” (Isaiah 32:17)

CHAPTER THREE

How do we want to be treated?

To suggest to you that you “treat others as you want to be treated” begs the obvious question, “how do you want to be treated?” And the answer is not as simple as you might believe at first blush. Consider the question seriously for a moment. At first you might believe that you want to lead a stressless life of comfort and ease, a life in which no burdens are placed upon you.That way you would have all the time in the world to do what you want to do. But if you consider this for a moment, do you want to lead a life in which you are pampered, coddled, medicated and fed fresh grapes peeled by nubile virgins? No, really, do you? Yes, it might appear appealing at first glance, but how long do you think you could remain happy in a challenge-free environment?Looking at the issue through an adult lens, would you be fulfilled with a life of pure hedonism? Or is the way you’d genuinely like to live your life a manner that offers you the self-respect and self-fulfillment of contributing to a just, caring society?

While a life of narcissistic pleasure-seeking might seem desirable at first glance, psychologists will tell you that individuals who live in circumstances approximating it typically develop a lot of problems. Rather than finding fulfillment in hedonism, individuals come to feel that their lives are purposeless and empty. Studies have shown people typically discover more personal happiness from behaviors that enhance their sense of self worth, and a generally acknowledged way to improve your sense of worth is by helping others.

This is not to imply, however, that every waking minute should be devoted to the service of others with no regard for ourselves and our own well-being.That style of living won’t lead to overall happiness either, because while basing all our decisions around our personal desires is a trap that will ultimately lead to alienation from others, doing the exact opposite — basing all our efforts on pleasing others — may lead to complete loss of self.In other words, some “me-time” that doesn’t negatively impact others is good.One just needs to avoid the “all-me-all-the-time” mindset and behavior pattern that so many have adopted these days.

So how do we want to be treated? If you ask this question, many are likely to respond that they want to be treated fairly.The difficult part of that desire is to determine what is “fair.” To many it equates with being treated the same way as everyone else — no special treatment good or bad. But to others it means getting all the advantages or perceived advantages they view others are receiving.Peeling back the onion, what they seek isn’t “fairness,” it is unfair advantages that are in their favor rather than against them.

Since I was a small child I heard from my mother and father that “life is not fair,” and I’m sure I’m not alone in that.Musings on the unfairness of life abound through religious texts, the works of the great philosophers and on to the essays and screeds populating the corners of the Internet.

Since the sense of what is fair and what is not on a human scale is subjective, it seems that one’s place on the fairness/unfairness scale is equally subjective and, all other things being equal (and we know they are not) individuals will look at particular circumstances in their life as being unfair to them largely because they seem more favorable to others.

Take this example from my life. When I was a pre-teen I wanted a gasoline-powered go kart. A couple of other kids in the neighborhood had them, and I thought it would be cool to have one.I started saving up my money to buy one, perhaps with the hope that my parents would kick in a little money, too.But somewhere into this process my parents told me succinctly, “No go kart.” I’m not sure why, but I suspect now that I was told no for financial reasons; we as a family simply didn’t have the money to afford a moderately expensive toy like a go kart at that time.

So other kids in the neighborhood had go karts, and I didn’t — and couldn’t — have a go kart.I guess you could say that is unfair.I might even have told my parents I thought it was unfair to which, if parental responses follow true-to-form, they would’ve replied, “We know, and as we have told you before, life is not fair.’”

But looking back at it through the long lens of time, I now do not consider that my pre-teen inability to obtain a go kart was even mildly unfair to me. Yes, others my age had go karts and I didn’t.Seems unfair, I guess.But that is only if you consider go kart/lack of go kart to be the central issue on what one considers fairness.In those terms I was the aggrieved party.Others had go karts; I didn’t.“That’s unfair to me,” I might have claimed.

But when I look back at all the circumstances of my youth versus others, despite my heinous lack of a go kart, I have to believe that life was no more unfair to me than it was to anyone else in my circumstances and by many measures I had advantages that could be considered unfair to others. For instance, I had two loving parents with high moral principles who communicated both love and ethical boundaries to me and to my brother.In retrospect, that alone is far more valuable than having a go kart.

So, again, peering at this through the perspective gained from decades on this planet, I have come to believe two things:First, from our Earthly perch as human beings it is impossible to determine what is fair and what isn’t. Second, most people who say they are seeking fairness are actually in need of mercy.

An important thing to understand about mercy is that mercy is typically not earned; it is received as a gift. The recipient of mercy may well not deserve it based on their words and their behavior, but granting mercy has immense benefits for both the donor and the recipient. In the vernacular you might describe mercy as “giving someone the benefit of the doubt.”And I think that’s what all of us want.We want to be given the benefit of the doubt.

Many of us like to present a strong, positive, self-assured image to the world. We find it appealing to revel in our independence, make our own choices and live our own lives. The “Man of Action” has now been joined by the “Independent Woman” as the templates of preferred, admired lifestyles. While community gains lip-service from many, the “primacy of me” is the lifestyle that seems to dominate popular culture.

“I had to be true to myself.”

“When I looked at all the options, I did what I had to do.”

“You only live once.”

Certainly, having the power to make your own decisions is valuable, but if that power enables you to constantly choose yourself over others, it will soon become destructive not only to those around you, but especially to you. Selfish people sabotage their opportunities for positive long-term relationships. The few long-term relationships they do develop are very likely to be destructively co-dependent. Instead of treating others the way they want to be treated, many members of today’s society treat themselves the way they want to be treated, and they only care about others in ways that further their own selfish ends.In other words they make themselves the star of their individual biopic and all the other people in their lives are, at best, supporting players and, at worst, extras in the epic movie that revolves around them.

At first glance, that sort of life has definite appeal. Who among us has not dreamed of being a movie icon, a rock star or a sports idol? But when you scratch the surface, many of those in the limelight have not found fulfillment in their money and fame.

Would you rather be rich or fulfilled? Would you rather be famous or have your self-respect?

I admit these are not always either-or choices. Certainly you can be rich and also be fulfilled. Yes, you can be famous and maintain your self-respect. But if you confront people around you with these choices many will opt for money at the expense of fulfillment and, as is obvious by a quick glance at YouTube, they will choose fame over self-respect any day of the week.

So with these choices in mind how, really, do you want to be treated?Do you want to be treated as a child who needs constant hand-holding and self-esteem-promotion to get through the day? Or do you want to be treated as an adult who can endure a disappointment, turn the other cheek at an affront and take a punch without collapsing to the floor?

One thing we all need is encouragement.

A friend and former boss of mine frequently uttered the telling phrase, “Life is hard. Then you die.”

This double-dose of pessimism is the heart of many people’s world view.They expect the worst and in what is, perhaps, a self-fulfilling prophecy, that’s what they get.

As another former co-worker of mine frequently opined, “The difference between an optimist and a pessimist is the pessimist is better informed.”To back up his premise, this friend, who happens to be the nicest guy in the world, searches the news each day for accounts of disasters, and then spreads the bad news far and wide to his many friends.Knowing I’m a sailor, he would deliver me maritime disaster stories on an almost daily basis, while another co-worker, a pilot, got the plane crash stories.

The point of this is if you look for bad in the world, you will find it.If you look for shortfalls and tragedies in your own life, you will find them.If you look for shortcomings in your spouse, family and friends you will find them. So life is hard.

But the antidote to that hardness is encouragement. We all benefit from a pat on the back. We all enjoy a kind word or even a simple smile. Sometimes that is all it takes to shift your mood from negative to positive; it is all it takes to motivate you to move forward rather than wallowing in failure and self-pity.

Encouragement takes many forms, but many revolve around bestowing mercy — providing comfort that is unearned.

Most of us want to be treated with respect, with empathy, with sympathy, with understanding. We strive to be valued, listened to, understood, comforted, reassured, aided and abetted. We want to be part of a larger whole, be accepted for what we are. And at the same time in our heart of hearts we would like to be more than we are at this moment in time. We would like to gain greater respect, greater comfort, greater reassurance, greater peace of mind. We want to be independent yet not solitary, fulfilled yet challenged. And if we can make a positive difference in others’ lives, most of us would achieve that fulfillment for which we constantly strive.

As I’ve mentioned before, this isn’t a book about religion, but one does find endorsement for this conduct in the Bible. For example, Ephesians 4:29 intones, “Don't use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.” [New Living Translation]

By encouraging others through word and action you show them how much you value them for who they are. You will find it will make a world of difference to them and their attitude toward their lives.What you might be surprised about is the fact that it will also make a world of difference to you and your attitude toward life. Good deeds are infectious and the key symptom is improved happiness.

CHAPTER FOUR

Being nice is more than just nice

In spite of the existence and apparent success of those who do the opposite, there should be general agreement that treating others with respect, honesty and empathy is a good thing. If you are encouraging and empathetic, it will result in positive human relationships and a general betterment of one’s life. Recent research even indicates that acts of giving trigger pleasure centers in the brain.