Tough Love E-Book

Lillian Speerbrecker

• Herausgeber: BookRix
• Kategorie: Sachliteratur, Reportagen, Biografien
• Sprache: Englisch

Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2013

Beschreibung

Tough Love is about the 9 months I spent in the care of Troubled Teen Boarding Facilities and the abuse that occurred. These things and worse are happening every day to the youth of American that are locked behind the walls in these facilities. Don't ignore whats happening.

Leseprobe

Lillian Speerbrecker

Tough Love

Truth Behind The Trouble Teen Industry

This book is dedicated to all that are fighting the abuse in these types of places and the poor souls that lost their lives in the name of "experimental therapy".BookRix GmbH & Co. KG81371 Munich

Tough Love

 My name is Lillian and these are real life events that happened to me when I was placed in the care of two 'Tough Love' programs. These events took place from May 31st. 2004 to February 11th 2005. Some names have been changed along with the name of the programs I will use in this book, but if you look for these programs they are not hard to find.            

It all started with a knock on the front door around 11:00 AM in Lansing Michigan. I was up stairs on the computer talking with some friends on a chat. I did not think anything about the knock on the door because if it was for me my father would have called me down stairs. About ten minutes had past and my father called for me to come down stairs. He was standing in front of the front door as if I would run away. I did not understand what was going on. Two people walked out from behind one wall in the kitchen, I have never seen these people before in my life. They sat me down on my couch and explained to me that they were taking me to a school. They would not explain further until later. My father looked at me and smiled and then walked away. This would be the last time I saw my father for months. It was a man and a woman who both stood in front of me, as if I was going to run. They then handcuffed me to the woman and took me out to the car sitting in my driveway. I remember praying for one of my friends to drive or walk by and to see what was happening. I was confused, they did not tell me where i was going, why i was handcuffed, or why they proceeded to tell me that they rented a car with child safety locks so I couldn't open the back doors.            

Sitting in the back seat of the car with the woman still handcuffed to me I remember passing by the local ice cream parlor. I continued to ask them about were I was going and what was going on. This is when they told me that they were taking me to a school in Mexico, that it was a behavior modification program for troubled teenagers, which later was told it was run by WWASP. Naturally I freaked out. I tired to get the handcuffs off of me, when the man reached back and tightened them on me so hard I had the bruises from it for two weeks. They told me that the place was CO-ED and that it was really nice, we got desert, and if I was really good I would get out in a year, I would also catch up on my school work and get back on track. So I found myself on the way to the Detroit airport Mexico bound. 

We got on the plane in Detroit MI and headed to Phoenix AZ to transfer, we then were headed for San Diego Ca. While on the plane headed to San Diego, my escorts gave me a letter from my father. In this letter he explained how much he loved me and he had to do this for my own good. That he was afraid I was going to end up in a ditch somewhere and he needed to save me. I was so angry at him! I ran away because he beat me while my step mother watched and did nothing. I ran away because I was tired of being physically abused by a man twice my size. Once we landed in San Diego we were headed for the boarder. We went down to Ensenada Mexico which is about 2 hours or so from the boarder give or take. We came to a stop in front of a big gated building that was tan in color and had a large red gate, big enough a large truck could drive through. We went in the gates, got out of the car, and headed for a small building. While inside the building a Mexican woman tried to talk to me in Spanish. I didn't understand anything she was saying. she then escorted me to another building were 2 other Mexican woman waited. They took me in a small room and told me to strip off all my clothes and to stand naked in front of them. I told them I was on my period and was wearing a tampon so I wouldn't take my panties off because I needed to remove it. One woman told me to go into the bathroom and remove it. I cried as I did what I was told. I went into the bathroom to do what I was told while I had these strange women watching me as I removed it from my body.                      

Standing naked in front of the women was the most scary and degrading things I have ever done. I didn't have a drug problem so I didn't understand why this was needed. I cried as I stood nude in front of them. I put my clothes back on and was taken to the showers by one of the girls already enrolled in the boarding school. She told me I only had 7 minutes to shower and told me I had to strip down to my bra and panties first, then walk in the shower then take them off. I must admit it did more crying than washing. I got out, she gave me a white t-shirt and some yellow pajama capris and then took me to a room full of sleeping girls. There was a mattress at the end of the long hallway on the floor that I figured was meant for me. I was taken to the bed, told not to talk at all. The student left me there. I was dropped off at 'Casa by the Water' at 11:00PM May 31st 2004. and as I laid there on my well used mattress, I cried myself to sleep not knowing what was going to happen to me, what was going on, or when I would possibly see my family again. I didn't understand what I have done that was so bad to get me sent to a place like this. I just figured i was a normal teenager. I was having a hard time with my mother and brother heading to prison and my aunt who pretty much raised me already in prison. My father didn't understand what I was going through and when ever I tried to talk to him it always turned out to things I was doing wrong. We were fighting a lot and things ended up getting physical. I ran away from home to avoid being hit, and tried to get to a place where I was understood. I didn't think these small things were any reason to send me away to a place out of the country, I didn't understand how my father could do this to me, didn't he love me? Didn't he want me anymore? I felt unloved and unwanted, like I was just a burden on the ones I loved, so they gave up on me and just sent me away so they wouldn't have to deal with me anymore. I was hurting, my family was in prison, I wouldn't see them for years, and then I got sent away to a prison as well. a program, that seemed like a resort to my parents, but ended up being a concentration camp to me.            

The next morning I woke up before everyone, being that i was still on Michigan time which was 3 hours ahead. I sat in my bed and waited. My eyes hurt and were puffy from crying all night. I kept thinking to myself that this had to be a nightmare, there was no way that this could really be happening to me right now. There was no way that I was in Mexico in a boarding school for bad kids.            

The lights were flipped on and all the girls piled out of there beds to a line in the center of the room. The front girl shouted         

 "Glory head count! Uno!"            

The counting continued down the line of girls till they got to me, I didn't say anything for the simple fact I didn't know how to count past 6 in Spanish. After the head count the girls broke off and went to there beds. They started making their beds and grabbing there clothes for the day and there toothbrush and tooth paste. The student who took me to the showers last night showed up again to help me with what was going on. I sat down on a bed that another girl was sitting on. The girl jumped up off the bed extremely fast. My "Buddy" as she was to be called told me that only one girl can sit on a bed at a time. I turned to the girl to say I was sorry, but she covered her ears and sped walked away from me. My "buddy" then explained to me that I couldn't talk to her because that girl was a level 2 and I also didn't have a 3rd person to listen. All these rules were making my head spin. I couldn't talk to people? Levels? I had to have a 3rd person listening to my conversation? I didn't understand what was going on, I was still in shock from what happened the day before, and now I'm being told I cant talk to people. I was so confused. We lined up again at the door to the building and another head count was preformed. We then walked to what they called "Spanish class". "Spanish class" consisted of sitting down in a tiny room for a half an hour watching the same half hour soap opera everyday, in Spanish. Now since I couldn't speak any Spanish I didn't see how this was helping me learn at all. I had no idea what they were saying on the show and no one could translate for me.            

After the show was over we lined up again and did another head count. We then headed towards the "commodore" or cafeteria. The walls were extremely bright yellow and I noticed a line of ants going from the window, up across the ceiling, and down the wall on the other side. It was gross. When I got to the food I got just a small bowl, I wasn't very hungry. I then followed my buddy to a wooden picnic table in the room. I sat down and looked at my bowl. Corn Pops. I wasn't fond of them, but I wasn't hungry anyway. I just sat there and stared at my food until my buddy who was sitting across from me proceeded to tell me that if I didn't eat they would put me in R&R. I asked what R&R was, she told me it was the "restraint room", and that they would make me sit in there for a long time. I looked out the window in frustration, now I'm being forced to eat. My Buddy then informed me that we were only allowed to look out the window for 3 second at a time and if we broke that rule I would get a Category 5 consequence which also resulted in being placed in R&R for a long period of time.